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  #1  
Old 08-26-2004, 10:03 AM
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Talking Meth & Mental Health

My son i s 25 and is bi-polar and has been addicted to Meth, his drug of choice. Now he is paying for his consequences. The past few years have been a total nightmare but the three of us (our son, his stepdad and I ) are remaining positive, desite the prison system. The majority of our families don't know what is going on with our son and don't even seem to care. My hubby & I went home for a funeral last week and only my nephew ask about our son. In a way it really irritates me as to their ignorance as they have known that all of his life he is bi-polar. I am certain that they don't ask because they don't know much about manic depression and just don't want to know because it doesn't affect them directly and they don't have to deal with it on a daily basis. It hurts though. We have 3 nieces and 1 nephew and 3 of them have children and I pray to God that they don't have to live life with any of these issues. My Father is old and not in the greatest of health and I could not begin to tell him about my son because I know his health could not withstand it!!!! Call me selfish, but he is my only living parent and I want to share my life with him, but I can't share this part of it....his health couldn't take it and I can't take that chance. Also, I don't feel it is my place to say anything to him or anyone else, that is a choice that our son will have to make. As you can see.......it is a catch 22....I want them to ask but yet I don't want to explain his time in prison. So we keep it to ourselves and life goes on.
My heart goes out to all of you and we will keep each and everyone of you in our prayers.
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  #2  
Old 08-26-2004, 07:05 PM
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Default they dont know what to say...PTO is your family, too

Thats really HARD!!! yeah people are scared to ask a lot of times. I dont think its really that they dont want to know...more like they dont know what to say...they think they are doing us a favor by not bringing the subject up to remind us...whether its the death of a loved one, a loved one that serving time...or even if your sick and been diagnosed with something terrible... so i bring the subject up myself... I say i got a letter from Gokoko today and go on to tell them what he's been up too...schooling projects, etc. thats me though, sometimes i even enjoy it when they squirm some ...
anyways, i hope your son is doing well...and dont forget you have family here now that want you to share, understand and are right beside you, 100%, 24/7

take good care...
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Old 02-26-2007, 01:55 PM
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Default Needing to be diagnosised

Hi, does anyone know how to get an evaluation in the texas system?
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Old 06-20-2007, 01:33 PM
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meth kills i have 17 yrs clean and my husband formed an addiction at 40 yrs old. he is currently in jail where he is safe with the exception that he is in need for addiction assistance. jail is not always the answer for addiction but medical help is i kicked my habit alone however there others that simply cant my husband is on depression pills and has expressed urges to kill himself. there is not an answer other than prayers at this point. god bless you and your family
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Old 06-20-2007, 01:49 PM
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rodeointx, I hate to say this, but jail is the last place to think someone is safe from drugs. They flow freely in ALL jails and prison systems. I'll keep your husband in my prayers, because if he hasn't had the opportunity to use he will and he will need all the prayers he can get.
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Old 06-20-2007, 05:43 PM
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im trully sorry and will keep your son in our prayers. my x is bipolar, and its very difficult to get along with him. dont loose hope
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Old 11-02-2007, 05:16 AM
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Default Ask his PO

Quote:
Originally Posted by rodeointx
meth kills i have 17 yrs clean and my husband formed an addiction at 40 yrs old. he is currently in jail where he is safe with the exception that he is in need for addiction assistance. jail is not always the answer for addiction but medical help is i kicked my habit alone however there others that simply cant my husband is on depression pills and has expressed urges to kill himself. there is not an answer other than prayers at this point. god bless you and your family
All inmates have a right to medical care...(didnt say it was the best).....Were his crimes drug related...he maybe sent to re-hab anyway....He can also request through his PO that he wants a mental health evaluation.....documents from his Dr on the outside can be submitted to back up that he needs these medications.....you can let his PO know that he is suicidal....however ...if they know that he may go to the hole, or PC (protective custody) just so he can be watched 24/7......probably not a good idea to send someone to a 4x4 cell with nothing other than yourself in there....all you get is paper, pen...and books to read....that has mental health issues, huh......

Hope this helps.....you get some good advice on here.....
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Old 10-07-2009, 03:52 PM
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It is sad but true that drugs run rampant in the system! And in most casses is easier to get than medical care when they are inside. My Boo is addicted to meth, and is bipolar. He has been trying to kick the habit and asked to be put in the hole to avoid the temptation. So far that is helping him not use, but what about when he comes home!? Avoiding it, is not kicking it!!!!!Not having access is different than saying no when the temptation is in your face! Most of his family uses and we live close to all of them. Trust me they don't help the situation. When he was sentenced they offered Prop 1000, would have been great send him to rehab!! But at the last moment pull it off the table. He was elegable because it was his only drug related arrest, but has been in for other reasons. So instead of 18 months rehab he got 4 years in. With no conditions towards rehab. Will be glad to have him home but it will be a challenge to keep him clean. He says he wants to kick it and I am willing to do whatever I have to, to help any advice would be greatly appriciated!
God be with all of you and your families I understand your strugles!
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Old 11-23-2009, 04:55 PM
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I'm curious - are there any type of programs he can take while he's incarcerated in your state? I know it isn't the same as being in a therapeutic program but it's a beginning.


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Old 12-08-2009, 10:19 PM
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I have bi polar, ive been off meth 18 months, but it aint easy.
It seems like it set my mind back 30 years..I`m 45 now.
But good anti depresants, and mood stabalizers help me alot, I couldnt function without them.
I surround myself with drug prevention for kids,,I even like na meetings now.
But its starting all over now,for me.
I have to be trying to help someone thes days..Total opposite of what I used to be.
So with that and help from Jesus is how I make it these days.
But thats just me,.....Best of luck to all.
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Old 02-07-2010, 06:16 PM
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Default My husband too

My husband(me) has also been dealing with meth and mental illness.He is bipolar and schizophrenic. It has been a very long and hard road, but I wouldn't change it because there is always hope.Which is a very sharp, double edged sword. I heard a line the other day and it fits so perfectly."the ones who are the hardest to love,need it the most" I read this browsing one day and it saved me.


This post is for husbands/wives of users. It is not for boyfriends and girlfriends or anyone else. If you are someone else, feel free to read and maybe something will help. However, my experience is as a wife with an addicted husband.
For all of you that are married to an addict: I assume you have all been given much of the same advice I had been given when I first started looking for help. I was told to leave him. I was told that I was enabling him. I was told that by staying, it meant I was codependent and I could never help him, that if I stayed, things would only get worse. I was told that our marriage would not survive. I was told to run away now while I could still have a life of my own. Among other things, good and bad, of course.
They were wrong.
I stayed. I helped. Yes, I suffered, but it was worth it. It was worth it because I have a clean husband, because my marriage survived, because we are both happy. It has been the hardest experience of my life, but I would do it again to get where we are now. Absolutely. Without a doubt.
If your decision is to stay, you need to know what you are getting into. Read, listen, study, learn all you can about meth, addiction, and recovery. Understand that the battle ahead is going to SUCK! Understand that it is going to hurt, that you will have to make sacrifices and that it will be the worst thing you have ever gone through. But like I said, I would do it again.
Yes, you can help. Yes, you can stay without enabling and being codependent. Yes, your marriage can survive.
Also, as yet another disclaimer, this advice is for those whose problem is meth. If there are other problems in your marriage, problems from before there was meth, then those are problems that will have to be solved or worked out otherwise. This advice concerns the present problem; meth.
Why didnt I leave my husband?
Because I dont believe in divorce.
Because I love him.
Because I was going to stay true to my vows.
Why face a decision that I have already made? On my wedding day I vowed that I would stay in this situation. I said I do, not I do if he does. I already made my choice.
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  #12  
Old 07-22-2010, 02:01 PM
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Just letting you know; I have been where your son is now. I used meth intravenously for 25 years, I am 53 now. I have been clean for 5 1/2 years now. I can understand why your son's drug of choice is meth; being bi-polar myself.

I want you to know there is hope for him; if HE wants it. I am starting a group where I live called Dual Diagnosis.
I am very excited about beginning a group here; it can help my small community a lot. The thing is, and this is very important, people HAVE to want this step for THEMSELVES before they take that step. Just support him, show your love, above all do not become his enabler. Learn what Manic - Depressive (bi-polar) is about and all that comes under its huge umbrella.

Hope this helps you; I am here if you need anything.
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Old 02-27-2011, 11:57 PM
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Default sad in sbdo.worried bout my baby

My boyfreind has had mentalevaluations and they say he is bipolar and has depression to the point of suicied attempts and cutting himself .since we been together I thought thangs were really starting to look better for him cuz he stoped the cutting and talkin in his sleep like he was having nightmares to the point hewould be sweating and man I would just hold on to him and pray to god to make it better.and I would just tell him I loved him and everythang was going to be ok/and the sweating twicthing and even the accasional outburst like he was arguing with someone had stopped.since I been with him they had him on seriqual and depokoate and other medication.seemed to me when he would take it he would just sleep like forever and couldn't be awokened.he stopped taking his meds and started using meth and I would.ask him babe do you need your medication and he said no im ok.well when his po came on the 27th of jan and arrested him I read her report and it said he was a danger to himself and others.byhim not taking his meds she said he was adanger to himself and using meth made him a danger to others.well his been in chino in the hole at first and now in pc.he wrote.me and said he had been relesed as of the 24th but was waitting for his po to come get him tuesday the1st of march cause the board said he had to go intoa treatment program.he says he is coming home first before going to the community based housing.is this possible can he come home for what ever reason or will sshe just be picking him up and dropping him off?

Last edited by missroxanne; 02-28-2011 at 12:35 AM..
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Old 08-18-2011, 04:31 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by purpletaz1956 View Post
My son i s 25 and is bi-polar and has been addicted to Meth, his drug of choice. Now he is paying for his consequences. The past few years have been a total nightmare but the three of us (our son, his stepdad and I ) are remaining positive, desite the prison system. The majority of our families don't know what is going on with our son and don't even seem to care. My hubby & I went home for a funeral last week and only my nephew ask about our son. In a way it really irritates me as to their ignorance as they have known that all of his life he is bi-polar. I am certain that they don't ask because they don't know much about manic depression and just don't want to know because it doesn't affect them directly and they don't have to deal with it on a daily basis. It hurts though. We have 3 nieces and 1 nephew and 3 of them have children and I pray to God that they don't have to live life with any of these issues. My Father is old and not in the greatest of health and I could not begin to tell him about my son because I know his health could not withstand it!!!! Call me selfish, but he is my only living parent and I want to share my life with him, but I can't share this part of it....his health couldn't take it and I can't take that chance. Also, I don't feel it is my place to say anything to him or anyone else, that is a choice that our son will have to make. As you can see.......it is a catch 22....I want them to ask but yet I don't want to explain his time in prison. So we keep it to ourselves and life goes on.
My heart goes out to all of you and we will keep each and everyone of you in our prayers.
I am a recovering crystal meth addict and I suffer from bipolar I. If I can be of any assistance, even just a listening ear I'd be happy to try to help.
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Old 08-18-2011, 04:34 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maryalice1956 View Post
Just letting you know; I have been where your son is now. I used meth intravenously for 25 years, I am 53 now. I have been clean for 5 1/2 years now. I can understand why your son's drug of choice is meth; being bi-polar myself.

I want you to know there is hope for him; if HE wants it. I am starting a group where I live called Dual Diagnosis.
I am very excited about beginning a group here; it can help my small community a lot. The thing is, and this is very important, people HAVE to want this step for THEMSELVES before they take that step. Just support him, show your love, above all do not become his enabler. Learn what Manic - Depressive (bi-polar) is about and all that comes under its huge umbrella.

Hope this helps you; I am here if you need anything.
MaryAlice, I wish I lived closer, I'd be the first to join you group. Its a daily struggle to stay clean with bipolar disorder. If you have any suggestions to help I'd appreciate them. Right now it's one day at a time, just harder with my biggest support system gone for awhile.
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Old 08-18-2011, 04:43 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by missroxanne View Post
My boyfreind has had mentalevaluations and they say he is bipolar and has depression to the point of suicied attempts and cutting himself .since we been together I thought thangs were really starting to look better for him cuz he stoped the cutting and talkin in his sleep like he was having nightmares to the point hewould be sweating and man I would just hold on to him and pray to god to make it better.and I would just tell him I loved him and everythang was going to be ok/and the sweating twicthing and even the accasional outburst like he was arguing with someone had stopped.since I been with him they had him on seriqual and depokoate and other medication.seemed to me when he would take it he would just sleep like forever and couldn't be awokened.he stopped taking his meds and started using meth and I would.ask him babe do you need your medication and he said no im ok.well when his po came on the 27th of jan and arrested him I read her report and it said he was a danger to himself and others.byhim not taking his meds she said he was adanger to himself and using meth made him a danger to others.well his been in chino in the hole at first and now in pc.he wrote.me and said he had been relesed as of the 24th but was waitting for his po to come get him tuesday the1st of march cause the board said he had to go intoa treatment program.he says he is coming home first before going to the community based housing.is this possible can he come home for what ever reason or will sshe just be picking him up and dropping him off?
Mental illness is hard on the individual as well as the loved ones, being both mentally ill, with a co-occuring addiction that is under control at this point. Ive been on both depakote and seroquel, but those meds have to be taken as directed and if they arent working a psychiatrist is going to be required to adjust the medication or dosage
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Old 08-18-2011, 04:56 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by karenacooper View Post
My husband(me) has also been dealing with meth and mental illness.He is bipolar and schizophrenic. It has been a very long and hard road, but I wouldn't change it because there is always hope.Which is a very sharp, double edged sword. I heard a line the other day and it fits so perfectly."the ones who are the hardest to love,need it the most" I read this browsing one day and it saved me.


This post is for husbands/wives of users. It is not for boyfriends and girlfriends or anyone else. If you are someone else, feel free to read and maybe something will help. However, my experience is as a wife with an addicted husband.
For all of you that are married to an addict: I assume you have all been given much of the same advice I had been given when I first started looking for help. I was told to leave him. I was told that I was enabling him. I was told that by staying, it meant I was codependent and I could never help him, that if I stayed, things would only get worse. I was told that our marriage would not survive. I was told to run away now while I could still have a life of my own. Among other things, good and bad, of course.
They were wrong.
I stayed. I helped. Yes, I suffered, but it was worth it. It was worth it because I have a clean husband, because my marriage survived, because we are both happy. It has been the hardest experience of my life, but I would do it again to get where we are now. Absolutely. Without a doubt.
If your decision is to stay, you need to know what you are getting into. Read, listen, study, learn all you can about meth, addiction, and recovery. Understand that the battle ahead is going to SUCK! Understand that it is going to hurt, that you will have to make sacrifices and that it will be the worst thing you have ever gone through. But like I said, I would do it again.
Yes, you can help. Yes, you can stay without enabling and being codependent. Yes, your marriage can survive.
Also, as yet another disclaimer, this advice is for those whose problem is meth. If there are other problems in your marriage, problems from before there was meth, then those are problems that will have to be solved or worked out otherwise. This advice concerns the present problem; meth.
Why didnt I leave my husband?
Because I dont believe in divorce.
Because I love him.
Because I was going to stay true to my vows.
Why face a decision that I have already made? On my wedding day I vowed that I would stay in this situation. I said I do, not I do if he does. I already made my choice.
I was an addicted wife, and I ruined our life due to meth. I've been clean 8 years now and all we have is hope to stay clean. One quote that sticks with me is... "In all things it is better to hope than to despair” ~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

its very admirable to stick by his side. I don't think I would have ever gotten in so deep if my husband hadn't left me. Luckily I found a great guy, even if he is an inmate right now...its only temporary
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Old 08-18-2011, 04:59 AM
MissLexy MissLexy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by neighbor View Post
I have bi polar, ive been off meth 18 months, but it aint easy.
It seems like it set my mind back 30 years..I`m 45 now.
But good anti depresants, and mood stabalizers help me alot, I couldnt function without them.
I surround myself with drug prevention for kids,,I even like na meetings now.
But its starting all over now,for me.
I have to be trying to help someone thes days..Total opposite of what I used to be.
So with that and help from Jesus is how I make it these days.
But thats just me,.....Best of luck to all.
Congrats on 18 mo...it gets easier over time..just keep taking your meds and you will be in good shape in no time. I'm 8 years clean from meth and bipolar
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Old 08-18-2011, 05:01 AM
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Originally Posted by mamajmg View Post
I'm curious - are there any type of programs he can take while he's incarcerated in your state? I know it isn't the same as being in a therapeutic program but it's a beginning.


Narcotics Anonymous and a good psychologist to talk to
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Old 08-18-2011, 05:24 AM
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Originally Posted by boosgirl View Post
It is sad but true that drugs run rampant in the system! And in most casses is easier to get than medical care when they are inside. My Boo is addicted to meth, and is bipolar. He has been trying to kick the habit and asked to be put in the hole to avoid the temptation. So far that is helping him not use, but what about when he comes home!? Avoiding it, is not kicking it!!!!!Not having access is different than saying no when the temptation is in your face! Most of his family uses and we live close to all of them. Trust me they don't help the situation. When he was sentenced they offered Prop 1000, would have been great send him to rehab!! But at the last moment pull it off the table. He was elegable because it was his only drug related arrest, but has been in for other reasons. So instead of 18 months rehab he got 4 years in. With no conditions towards rehab. Will be glad to have him home but it will be a challenge to keep him clean. He says he wants to kick it and I am willing to do whatever I have to, to help any advice would be greatly appriciated!
God be with all of you and your families I understand your strugles!
Thats just sad when all they really need is some good psychological help. I guess thats why im working on my degree in psychology
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Old 08-18-2011, 03:25 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MissLexy View Post
I was an addicted wife, and I ruined our life due to meth. I've been clean 8 years now and all we have is hope to stay clean. One quote that sticks with me is... "In all things it is better to hope than to despair” ~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

its very admirable to stick by his side. I don't think I would have ever gotten in so deep if my husband hadn't left me. Luckily I found a great guy, even if he is an inmate right now...its only temporary
I am an ex-wife of an inmate and meth addict, i didnt leave him he left me and his daughter. we are in daily contact now and im trying to help him through the ordeal of prison. Our daughter was recently diagnosed with bi-polar so this has been 10yrs of hell
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Old 08-18-2011, 03:36 PM
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im a newly registered member so bear with me, meth has destroyed our family for 10 yrs my ex is an addict and inmate our daughter was just diagnosed with bi-polar help
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Old 08-19-2011, 11:21 PM
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I've been in an on again/off again relationship for 20 years with my ex who is ADHD/bi-polar/meth addict. I've tried my hardest to stay strong and stick by his side...We have a 16 year old daughter together that has given up hope on her dad. I love this man like no other. He did 86 months...was home & living the family life with us for 5 months, until he decided that was enough. He left one night & was gone for a month until I received that dreaded collect call. He ended up with another drug charge and got 24 months. He has been nothing but mean and disrespectful to me since he got sentenced. I tried to give him his space & the other day I got a letter from him. It was one of the most disrespectful, degrading letters I have EVER read in my life.He said things that I have NEVER heard him say to me & NEVER thought he'd say to me. I feel so hurt and taken advantage of. I've been the only one that has stuck by his side through all of this & this is the way he is going to treat me?? the letter before this, he told me that every time he thinks about me he gets angry. I really don't know what I've done so bad to him, to make him dislike me so much...but I will say one thing, I have learned a few things in this past month. I have to remove myself from his negative ways of thinking. It just kills me to see him this way. I know I can't fix him & I have to continue on with life for the sake of our daughter and me. Love him...but I gotta go thanks for letting me vent....

Last edited by lifeshard; 08-19-2011 at 11:24 PM..
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Old 10-03-2011, 11:33 PM
Danyalgrace Danyalgrace is offline
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You are right about one thing.. you have to stop the negative feelings. Negativity has a way of breaking you down. Miseary loves company and negativity is the devil. More then likely he is mad at himself for ending up back behind bars and he has no one to take it out on. Im sure he hasnt thought about the way it made you feel abandonded when he left. He can only change and help himself when he is ready... and clearly he isnt ready. Just know it isnt your fault, keep a smile on your face and make TODAY the best that it can be.
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Old 10-09-2011, 01:13 AM
foreveralone foreveralone is offline
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Default My husband is bi-polar and he is a meth addict....

My husband is 37 yrs old, is bi-polar and has benn addicted to Meth for most of his adult life. When i met and fell in love with him he was clean. However at the time, I was coming off of my own addiction and little did i know about the road that i was about to go down. About six months into our relationship, he began using again. I didnt know much about Bi-polar illness until it was mixed with active addiction. While my husband used Meth he did't take his medication and "our" fight for his life was on. Not only did he act in the most violent and hurtful ways, but he did the most violent and hurtful things. I often tried to reason with my self to explain away the things he said and did. But soon realized that even in his moments of clarity, even he couldn't even explain the whys. I researched Bi-polar illness and Meth. It was then that I started finding the answers. Meth destroys lives but topped with mental illness, creates a battle that many do not win. Which leads me to the present. My husband has been clean since May 4, 2011 only with the help of the Idaho Dept. of Corrections. He will be released in late May 2012. I have faith that he will once again be the man that I fell in love with. Even when odds are against him, i will be there.

Last edited by foreveralone; 10-09-2011 at 01:22 AM..
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