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  #1  
Old 09-06-2012, 03:28 PM
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Question Should I go back to work for DOC with an MWI relationship?

I am a former DOC staff member, currently unemployed, that has been offered the opportunity to interview for another position with DOC thru an outside contractor. If I opt to interview and take this position I would have to be honest and let them know that I "correspond" with an "inmate" and probably have to give his information.

The issue is my loved one obviously doesn't want me to interview or accept a position with DOC again as it will effect visitation (I wouldn't be able to apply for visitation) and him being transferred back to the area in which the facility is located and where I'd be employed, his hometown, for the duration of my employment.

I'm completely at a loss. On one hand - I need the job/money. Since my unemployment it's the only thing being offered. On the other - there's him. I know the easy/obvious response would be to do what's best for myself. I get that and at the end of the day that's precisely what I intend to do. But I'm wondering what would you all do in this situation.

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Old 09-06-2012, 03:42 PM
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If you don't accept the offer won't the unemployment end? You can't take care of yourself and responsibility by having visitation.I know being able to visit is important for our relationships but jobs aren't always easy to come by.I'm sure you not being stressed and being strong mentally and emotionally is important and a job will provide that.Not being able to visit will cause an imbalance but you don't have worried of how you're going to eat,or pay your light bill. Have you had offers for any other type of work? How much longer does he have. Do you have kids,is it only affecting you? You have to be realistic with yourself. I choose to eat and have a roof over my head vs inconvience of not being able to visit..Good luck

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Old 09-06-2012, 03:43 PM
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Cannot risk being caught in a lie. State DOCs are not looking kindly upon relationships between staff and inmates especially if staff member lied on the application. Repercussions are getting harsher, too. Plus, if caught, it leaves a big skid mark on job history.

I would either end the relationship and answer the question truthfully if asked for time period or just look for another job.

I worked for the DOC as a CO a long time ago; and I'd rather cook fries and sling burgers than go back. In any position.

Last edited by OneOfMany; 09-06-2012 at 03:44 PM..
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Old 09-06-2012, 04:00 PM
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Ive had one other possible, still waiting to hear back from them. It's my first choice, the job with DOC just happened to call while Im waiting. He has 3 more years, no kids, and it would effect him because accepting the position would mean that I would have to tell DOC that we correspond and he wouldn't be transferred back to this area which is his hometown/where his family lives. Currently he's 12 hours away.


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If you don't accept the offer won't the unemployment end? You can't take care of yourself and responsibility by having visitation.I know being able to visit is important for our relationships but jobs aren't always easy to come by.I'm sure you not being stressed and being strong mentally and emotionally is important and a job will provide that.Not being able to visit will cause an imbalance but you don't have worried of how you're going to eat,or pay your light bill. Have you had offers for any other type of work? How much longer does he have. Do you have kids,is it only affecting you? You have to be realistic with yourself. I choose to eat and have a roof over my head vs inconvience of not being able to visit..Good luck

LoveMeSomeHim .... God gives 2nd chances... 2ndchance4DO
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Old 09-06-2012, 04:03 PM
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I wouldn't lie. All DOC asks is if you correspond with an inmate to which I would tell them yes. The details aren't their business and I would maintain that.

I felt the same way about going back to DOC and I wasn't even an officer lol. I never want to go back BUT in light of my current job situation - it may be my only option so I have to consider it.

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Cannot risk being caught in a lie. State DOCs are not looking kindly upon relationships between staff and inmates especially if staff member lied on the application. Repercussions are getting harsher, too. Plus, if caught, it leaves a big skid mark on job history.

I would either end the relationship and answer the question truthfully if asked for time period or just look for another job.

I worked for the DOC as a CO a long time ago; and I'd rather cook fries and sling burgers than go back. In any position.
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Old 09-06-2012, 04:04 PM
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I did not meet my husband while I worked in the system. However I quit a job and went to work in a better paying job outside of the system. I was laid off due to budget cuts. I applied for a case manangement position in DOC and was upfront anad honest about my husband. They interviewed me and did my background check and reference check. I was still not given the job.
It is my belief that they will not hire you because of your relationship. This has happened twice to me. And like I said, I did not meet him while working for DOC. I understand your situation. Jobs are hard to come by. Good luck.
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Old 09-06-2012, 04:08 PM
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Originally Posted by Beelasoul View Post
Ive had one other possible, still waiting to hear back from them. It's my first choice, the job with DOC just happened to call while Im waiting. He has 3 more years, no kids, and it would effect him because accepting the position would mean that I would have to tell DOC that we correspond and he wouldn't be transferred back to this area which is his hometown/where his family lives. Currently he's 12 hours away.
Bee, are you willing to take a job that you know could be a problem on so many levels?

In my opinion, if you really love your man, don't take the job and risk the relationship.....or the issues that will come up.

I also believe that if you continue to look, you will find something that is not DOC oriented....taking care of any problems that could arise.

I know people will say jobs are hard to come by, but sometimes we sacrifice....it is part of life.

As you stated yourself, do what is best for you. I hope it all works out for you either way.

Peace~
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Old 09-06-2012, 04:23 PM
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in some states if you are married to an iate you cannot work for the DOC they definately frown upon relationships with inmates. When I worked in corrections there was an inmate in af seg waiting to be transfered because his niece was a new CO and was going to be working in the facility. He was transferred ad far away as humanly posiible.
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Old 09-07-2012, 08:10 AM
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I wouldn't lie. ...

BUT in light of my current job situation - it may be my only option so I have to consider it.
I hear you. Bills do have to be paid after all.
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Old 09-07-2012, 08:27 AM
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It is an issue that he will not be able to be colse to home if you take the job.
The thng that stands out is that he only has three years left.
My man is in shu for a little over three more years and IF that was the only job I could find then he would probably encourage me to take it.
Will this affect his parole too?
Have you exausted all other options such as perhaps working at a casno (if your area has them) or other semi-related position?If that should apply to your skill set.
I would not lie and would also look very hard at other options first.
Still,bills have to get paid and he has a roof over his head,
Does he want to stick it out with you if you take this job?
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Old 09-07-2012, 09:07 AM
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My dad was transferred to another state when my aunt started working at chino
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Old 09-07-2012, 09:44 AM
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I would say find another job. There has to be something else you can do/are qualified for.
If you were in the secretarial/clerk position then why not apply at a hospital as a clerk or a similar job?
I would do what your man is asking of you and not apply.
It would mean more to me that he get visits from his family and is closer to home.
I am sorry you are in this position. Why not pray about the situation. Prayer moves mountains.
Thinking of you and wishing you the best.
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Old 09-07-2012, 01:20 PM
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There are no easy answers here....

On the one hand, it is easy to say take the job because jobs are hard to come by these days but in so doing you sacrafice important elements of your relationship and it also affects him in terms of where he is housed for the duration of his sentence. It would be difficult for me to make a decision that would affect another person in that way.

On the other hand, how would you feel if you passed up a job opportunity and this relationship doesn't work out? I know you don't want to consider that notion, noone does but if you are to consider all of the possibilities this is one of them.

I don't envy your position. Best of luck with whatever you decide.
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Old 09-07-2012, 01:52 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by InmateLover67

Bee, are you willing to take a job that you know could be a problem on so many levels?

In my opinion, if you really love your man, don't take the job and risk the relationship.....or the issues that will come up.

I also believe that if you continue to look, you will find something that is not DOC oriented....taking care of any problems that could arise.

I know people will say jobs are hard to come by, but sometimes we sacrifice....it is part of life.

As you stated yourself, do what is best for you. I hope it all works out for you either way.

Peace~
I agree with inmatelover67...If you love him then maybe you should consider not working for DOC...There will be problems....

Hope all balances itself out for you
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Old 09-07-2012, 04:46 PM
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I can tell you what I would do with the benefit of hindsight (no, I was not in your situation) - take the job. Letters will have to do. It wasn't all that long ago that if people were more than a few miles apart they couldn't talk at all, and yet relationships survived. Whaling-ship captains still had wives when they came home from a year at sea, during which there was no communication at all!
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Old 09-07-2012, 08:44 PM
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As a former DOC employee, I can tell you that when you apply they will ask on the application if you know of anyone that has been incarcerated in the past five years. You have to be upfront, I was and I was offered the job..however, you will have to go through the Warden to request permission to visit, write and even talk to the individual. Until you get permission if you are caught, it is grounds for immediate termination. It is up to the Warden and depending on what state you are in, their home office, for example in VA it is Richmond. That is a choice that you have to make, I know it's not fair but the DOC, whether we want to believe it or not has power...good luck to you!!
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Old 09-07-2012, 08:54 PM
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Thank you all for the feedback. After much thought and prayer I have decided that it's in the best interest of both of us that I not pursue the position. Mainly because once I left DOC I told myself that I would never go back. That's how much I hated it, and for reasons far beyond him. It's a system that I don't agree with; how they treat the inmates, the policies and procedures in place, I was against it all, thus making it a pretty miserable work environment. Granted I am in need of a job but I have to have faith and believe that my Higher Power will provide something better. Also I couldn't make such a selfish decision when literally everything he does involves "US" and not "I". He deserves better than that. I have to start thinking along those same lines.

I will keep applying and something else will come along.
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