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  #1  
Old 05-30-2012, 09:33 PM
spiffy-heart spiffy-heart is offline
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Default Grandparents rights and bringing grandchildren to visit father?

Quote:
Originally Posted by yourself
OK, you have no rights, but your husband does. He has a right to reasonable visitation. She, the children's mother, is not responsible for picking up the children, or taking them to the prison, but if you have a clean record and a decent car and a driver's license, you could very well do that.

Visitation will not get you very far. What you need to do is get CPS involved. If they're big into drugs, make sure they're holding and beef them to the cops....
yourself,
How can I get my grandchildren to the prison to visit my, their Dad? Can my sons father, or I (when I go there) have the "right" to take his children to see him, if they want to go? The ex-wife is trying to keep ALL contact from any of us on our side of my sons family. I've searched La. laws for grandparent rights, and don't think we have any rights. Hoping my son does though.

Spiffy heart

Good son in La.
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  #2  
Old 05-30-2012, 10:44 PM
yourself yourself is online now
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Grandparents rights vary widely from one state to another. In many states, grandparents have no rights. To be able to pick up your grandchild and take him to see his father, his father has to enforce custody. Now, assuming he hasn't modified custody or support since going in, he'll have to do a Petition for Modification. That petition should request specific modification for visitation (and reduction of support) while incarcerated, and an increase of visitation (and support) upon a release and change in circumstances. You can facilitate this, assuming you have POA, by having him write a letter that states he's interested in seeing his child, is incarcerated, and has asked you to help facilitate this sort of action. Take that letter and the POA to a few attorneys who specialize in family law, and go from there. Listen to what each says, and hire the one who's the best fit.
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  #3  
Old 06-01-2012, 06:55 PM
spiffy-heart spiffy-heart is offline
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Thanks yourself! I had trouble finding this thread! I have sent my sons father your response, because he is the power of attorney. I think our son has been afraid to make waves with the ex, that it might do more harm than good! My ex DIL has been VERY litigious while using her Dads money! It broke the rest of us!

[quote="spiffy-heart"]Thanks yourself! I had trouble finding this thread! I have sent my sons father your response, because my ex is my sons power of attorney, so I sent him our correspondence. He is just snowed under, handling my sons legal stuff, Taxes, bankruptcy, divorce and child custody, let alone, criminal lawyer and appellate stuff!

I got into hot water with sons atty and my ex-DIL for having a FB web site to raise money for my son. I could not find pictures that didn't have him with his kids together. So there were his and the kids pictures...really good ones, on the same site that told his story of being accused of rape, and, the accusers picture, which she had posted on public forum. DIL complained to the child court judge, etc, had her friends crash my website with ugly emails, etc. so I had to back down, which really got my goat! My son DID commit adultery, and this skanky vamp tried to use him, and when she didn't get what she wanted (her bf out of jail) she cries rape!

I am NOT giving up, trying to help get his time either shortened, or acquitted!

Spiffy heart
An AL mom, with son in god forsaken La.

Last edited by spiffy-heart; 06-01-2012 at 07:33 PM..
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  #4  
Old 06-01-2012, 07:55 PM
Broken24u Broken24u is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by yourself View Post
Grandparents rights vary widely from one state to another. In many states, grandparents have no rights. To be able to pick up your grandchild and take him to see his father, his father has to enforce custody. Now, assuming he hasn't modified custody or support since going in, he'll have to do a Petition for Modification. That petition should request specific modification for visitation (and reduction of support) while incarcerated, and an increase of visitation (and support) upon a release and change in circumstances. You can facilitate this, assuming you have POA, by having him write a letter that states he's interested in seeing his child, is incarcerated, and has asked you to help facilitate this sort of action. Take that letter and the POA to a few attorneys who specialize in family law, and go from there. Listen to what each says, and hire the one who's the best fit.

Dear Yourself, you are wonderful to answer all the questions you do for those of us who are suffering at home! Thank you so much! I live in TN and my son has not seen his son in 4 years. His ex-wife would not allow him to even get his correspondence until a year ago. He is 7 years old. His dad will be in prison 6 more years. Is the process the same for TN? He has never asked to modifiy his child support in fear she will not let him talk to his child. She is a bitter woman and will retaliate. Thank you for your insight!
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  #5  
Old 06-01-2012, 10:23 PM
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Dear Yourself, you are wonderful to answer all the questions you do for those of us who are suffering at home! Thank you so much! I live in TN and my son has not seen his son in 4 years. His ex-wife would not allow him to even get his correspondence until a year ago. He is 7 years old. His dad will be in prison 6 more years. Is the process the same for TN? He has never asked to modifiy his child support in fear she will not let him talk to his child. She is a bitter woman and will retaliate. Thank you for your insight!
No problem. All I can say is you should check with a good family law attorney. Ask about grandparent's rights in TN. Ask about modification of support and visitation to include visitation during incarceration and beyond. Do explain that DIL has withheld ALL contact - mail and phone, not just visitation.

Visitation becomes a really big issue when the home prison is too far away (i.e. it's going to take an overnight to get a 1 hour visitation - courts will generally find that a bit unreasonable).

Note, anything you start will be met with, "I'm going to terminate his parental rights", so you really need to ask questions about TPR, and get a good sense of how likely that will be - whether it's an empty threat or something with a bit of teeth to it.

Good luck with this. A child should know his/her father, even if incarcerated. DILs who don't understand that are doing a huge disservice to their kid. They generally paint the father as evil incarnate, and when the kid finally gets contact with dad, even as an adult, they find out that's not the case. It turns around and the kid usually winds up with bitter feelings towards his/her mother. I try to tell people, if the parent is an ass, the kid will figure it out for him/herself. Your job is to be there when that child figures it out, and help the child cope. Your job is not to bad mouth the other parent. Kids know; they come from 2 parents, so anything bad you say about 1 parent, is something bad you're saying about the child him/herself. Kids get very black and white like that, and it's not good.

Anyway, check around for a good family lawyer. Lots of times you can get a first visit free. If you can't afford a lawyer, check with legal aid in your area - they handle civil matters pro bono or for a sliding fee. Also check the law schools. Some have family law clinics where you'll meet with students, but those students are overseen by a licensed attorney who's also a law school professor specializing in family law. You can also ask around with your friends, especially those who've gone through divorce, about their experiences with various attorneys, and you can do that without talking about why you really need one, if that's a sticking point. Most people LOVE to talk about their experiences in divorce, whether they loved or hated their attorney.
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  #6  
Old 06-06-2012, 03:37 PM
Broken24u Broken24u is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by yourself View Post
No problem. All I can say is you should check with a good family law attorney. Ask about grandparent's rights in TN. Ask about modification of support and visitation to include visitation during incarceration and beyond. Do explain that DIL has withheld ALL contact - mail and phone, not just visitation.

Visitation becomes a really big issue when the home prison is too far away (i.e. it's going to take an overnight to get a 1 hour visitation - courts will generally find that a bit unreasonable).

Note, anything you start will be met with, "I'm going to terminate his parental rights", so you really need to ask questions about TPR, and get a good sense of how likely that will be - whether it's an empty threat or something with a bit of teeth to it.

Good luck with this. A child should know his/her father, even if incarcerated. DILs who don't understand that are doing a huge disservice to their kid. They generally paint the father as evil incarnate, and when the kid finally gets contact with dad, even as an adult, they find out that's not the case. It turns around and the kid usually winds up with bitter feelings towards his/her mother. I try to tell people, if the parent is an ass, the kid will figure it out for him/herself. Your job is to be there when that child figures it out, and help the child cope. Your job is not to bad mouth the other parent. Kids know; they come from 2 parents, so anything bad you say about 1 parent, is something bad you're saying about the child him/herself. Kids get very black and white like that, and it's not good.

Anyway, check around for a good family lawyer. Lots of times you can get a first visit free. If you can't afford a lawyer, check with legal aid in your area - they handle civil matters pro bono or for a sliding fee. Also check the law schools. Some have family law clinics where you'll meet with students, but those students are overseen by a licensed attorney who's also a law school professor specializing in family law. You can also ask around with your friends, especially those who've gone through divorce, about their experiences with various attorneys, and you can do that without talking about why you really need one, if that's a sticking point. Most people LOVE to talk about their experiences in divorce, whether they loved or hated their attorney.

I can't tell you how much I appreciate your advice! I have selected a family law attorney and plan to meet with him soon. I agree totally with what you said about either parent, should they choose to disallow visitation. It will always come back to "bite them".

God bless you for the hope and advice you have given to so many of us!
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