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  #1  
Old 02-26-2010, 08:42 PM
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Default Where do banned members go? What do they do?...

Hi y'all! For those of you who don't know me, my name is Andy. And today is my first day back from 'the land of the banished'. Where do banned members go when they are banned from PTO?? What do they do? And is it possible to live without PTO in our daily lives? Well these are all good questions that I had to confront not once, but twice. Yes, I have been banned twice for arguing my point with vigor and zeal.....and both times with the same person. Was I wrong? .....maybe.

The first time I was banned back in October, I was crushed!! PTO was my whole world. I have more friends on PTO than I do on My Space. So much was happening during that time including a promotion to a managers position at work. Crushed or not, I had a shop to run...a crew to lead. And that's just what I did. I put my hurt feelings aside to run this quick lube shop to the best of my ability. Someone actually had enough faith in this middle-aged ex-con to turn over the reins. I buried myself in work; yet, I never forgot the PTO members who helped me keep pushing for bigger and better things.

The second time I was banned was a month ago. Again, I was crushed. But this time, it felt like Deja Vu all over again. This time, I felt resentful and unapologetic because I felt like I had done nothing wrong. But, whether I was wrong or in the right really isn't the point here. Because what happened next was truly amazing!! Many of you wonderful people came out of the woodwork and began 'reaching out' to me via personal email. This out pouring was enough to make me cry at times; enough to help me hold my head high with pride at other times!! I was even invited to other support sites where my views were welcomed....not seen as overzealous or over-the-top.

I guess what I'm trying to say here is Thank You to all of you wonderful people...my people...MY FRIENDS!! You rallied at my side when I needed you the most!! You see when we are cut off from our social networks, it feels like we are cut off from 'our whole world'...our whole circle. PTO is a wonderful place!! This proves that the people you befriend here ARE truly your friends. And like friends you meet anywhere else they are no different.......you CAN keep them regardless of where you chose to network socially. You see real friends are just that.....Real Friends. I want to give a big thumbsup to all of my friends...you know who you are!!:thum bsup:.......andy

Last edited by retired-37; 02-26-2010 at 09:02 PM.. Reason: grammar
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  #2  
Old 02-26-2010, 09:01 PM
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YAY, I AM GLAD you're back Andy. I was wondering where you went! I didnt think you would leave so suddenly..........

I wonder where they go as well. Some people and ALL people DO deserve a second chance. Now some of the trolls, they can go back to Wonderland or wherever. I have argued my point til Im blue in the face. I also think that some people are just a little more passionate than others.

I am guilty as sin of being a smart ass.

I dont have as much trouble as I once did. But I would like to know what warrants banning at times? Because a new member I dearly like, I seen Account closed by her name and today it says Banned. I DID go thru her posts and I seen nothing warranting being banned...... (I guess I may be on the fence with this one)

I know this thread will be monitored like sharks but really, I would like to know, too.

Glad to have you back Andy. You didnt go to the Grasshopper/Cotton field did you?
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Old 02-26-2010, 09:03 PM
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Welcome back ^_^
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Old 02-26-2010, 09:17 PM
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YAY, I AM GLAD you're back Andy. I was wondering where you went! I didnt think you would leave so suddenly..........

I wonder where they go as well. Some people and ALL people DO deserve a second chance. Now some of the trolls, they can go back to Wonderland or wherever. I have argued my point til Im blue in the face. I also think that some people are just a little more passionate than others.

I am guilty as sin of being a smart ass.

I dont have as much trouble as I once did. But I would like to know what warrants banning at times? Because a new member I dearly like, I seen Account closed by her name and today it says Banned. I DID go thru her posts and I seen nothing warranting being banned...... (I guess I may be on the fence with this one)

I know this thread will be monitored like sharks but really, I would like to know, too.

Glad to have you back Andy. You didnt go to the Grasshopper/Cotton field did you?
Thanxx Thugwife, but, I don't think you're a smart ass. I think you're outspoken. Sometimes, we speak out against the things we find to be unjust. I find no fault with you or anyone in that. It's people like you who will one day change the system. Kudos to you Thugwife!!...andy
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Old 02-26-2010, 09:17 PM
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Welcome back.

I can answer some of your questions, but if I did, I would probably get banned. (under the promoting other websites rule)
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Old 02-26-2010, 11:40 PM
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As far as why members get banned, everyone here agrees to a certain set of "terms and conditions" otherwise known as PTO policy when they join. Members who cannot abide by those policies risk their membership being in jeopardy.

At the end of the day, PTO did not become the biggest and best site for prisoner support by allowing inappropriate and/or unsupportive behaviour on the boards.

I don't know all the specific details around the ban(s) in question but I can promise that the decisions are not arbitrary or made based on emotion.

Where you work or go to school there is an expectation of decency - it is no different here or in any other reputable site. For a reminder of all PTO's governing policies please click here.
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Old 02-27-2010, 01:48 AM
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I wondered where you were! Glad you are back, Andy!
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Old 02-27-2010, 01:52 AM
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thanks for asking the questions everyone is afraid to ask.
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  #9  
Old 02-27-2010, 06:41 AM
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WELCOME BACK dear andy!!!! you were most def. missed!!!!! now BEHAVE!!!!
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Old 02-27-2010, 06:50 AM
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Reading someones posts will not neccessarily be an indicator of why anyone was banned/suspended.

All I will say is that everyone on PTO may not be who you think they are. While 99 % of members are genuine, there are those that open accounts fraudulently, many times multiple accounts, in order to fool members as well as staff. When they are found out, they are removed from the site for the protection of other members.



Quote:
Originally Posted by thugwife View Post
But I would like to know what warrants banning at times? Because a new member I dearly like, I seen Account closed by her name and today it says Banned. I DID go thru her posts and I seen nothing warranting being banned...... (I guess I may be on the fence with this one)

I know this thread will be monitored like sharks but really, I would like to know, too.
  #11  
Old 02-27-2010, 07:09 AM
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When I was banned, I went off to my other 2 message boards and watched more tv.

I learned to stay on topic, avoid certain forums, and not retaliate to perceived insults. Sometimes it is hard to bite my tongue(fingers) when people get a$$y.

I am used to posting on relatively unmoderated boards so it took me a while to figure out what is acceptable and not here. I'm used to typing exactly what I think with no gloves on. Normally, I would not post on a board moderated this heavily but I realized that I need to come here for support that I can't get anywhere else so I am trying to be good. I get the fact that this board is support so kid's gloves are required.
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Old 02-27-2010, 07:27 AM
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Welcome Back, Andy!!
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Old 02-27-2010, 08:36 AM
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welcome back Andy!

as CoNpal said
******I learned to stay on topic, avoid certain forums, and not retaliate to perceived insults. Sometimes it is hard to bite my tongue(fingers) when people get a$$y.******


If someone posts something that isnt supportive to another or down right nasty........dont respond to it. Report it if its directed at you. (or you perceive it to be)

It does no good, and fuels the flames of a fire that could be ugly.
I know I have had to step back many many times from things that I either think are crazy, rude, mean spirited or downright hurtful.
I still feel like I need a roll of duct tape for the fingers sometimes.

I really like this site, and its purpose. It feels like its literally saved my life sometimes.

anyway.......glad your back Andy!
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Old 02-27-2010, 03:24 PM
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Welcome back Andy!
I Love You to pieces!
xo!
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Old 02-27-2010, 03:31 PM
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Reading the posts definitely won't explain a banning to you, Andy. The offending posts would have been removed from member sight. Besides the multiple accounts, the constant arguing, etc., that one can be banned for, you wouldn't believe some of the PMs sent both to other members and to staff by some of those who have been banned. The insulting, foul, threatening, obscene PMs. You don't want to know how badly some people can behave.
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Old 02-27-2010, 04:12 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nimuay View Post
Reading the posts definitely won't explain a banning to you, Andy. The offending posts would have been removed from member sight. Besides the multiple accounts, the constant arguing, etc., that one can be banned for, you wouldn't believe some of the PMs sent both to other members and to staff by some of those who have been banned. The insulting, foul, threatening, obscene PMs. You don't want to know how badly some people can behave.
Amen to the bit that I highlighted- When I was still on the staff (I resigned due to personal time issues, no drama or hard feelings were involved) I was amazed at some of the PMs I got... and oddly, it was the simplest situations that seemed to provoke the most venom.

Reading through the posts will never tell you the whole story and only in the case of the most obvious, cruel trolls or spammers (those peddling "designer" handbags) are folks banned without having been advised, usually more than once or twice that whatever they were doing was NOT cool and why.
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Old 02-27-2010, 04:53 PM
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back Andy, your friends have missed your interesting dialog, your input and your general all around good friendship, your a gem of a decent person

Last edited by Mayone; 02-27-2010 at 04:55 PM..
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Old 02-28-2010, 09:43 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nimuay View Post
Reading the posts definitely won't explain a banning to you, Andy. The offending posts would have been removed from member sight. Besides the multiple accounts, the constant arguing, etc., that one can be banned for, you wouldn't believe some of the PMs sent both to other members and to staff by some of those who have been banned. The insulting, foul, threatening, obscene PMs. You don't want to know how badly some people can behave.
Believe it or not this started over me receiving hateful PM's by a certain member. I forwarded his ugly PM's to a blue moderator. This person was told to stop this. That is when he started to to send ugly emails to my email account. I again reported this to several moderators under the rule that if you start trouble on other websites and it follows you back to PTO, you will be banned and he was. But much to my dismay so was I. All I did was try to stop this. I was banned out of the blue(several days after this happened). And the banned message said, "You and your sparring partner can take a month off to cool down."

As I've said before, I think this is a wonderful site. I have met some wonderful people who have helped me get my life together after prison. However, I have also run into bullies, trolls, and my first online stalker. Because this person who I have been banned over twice is still harrassing me via private email. Just as soon as I block his email address he opens another so he can send me more ugly harrassing messages. Pto is a wonderful place but we might want to keep our personal information private. The only reason this person had my email address is because he was my friend here........or so I thought.......andy

Last edited by retired-37; 02-28-2010 at 09:45 AM.. Reason: add content
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Old 02-28-2010, 10:43 AM
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keep your email private.
achapinguy, is there anyway you can change your email addy?
just a thought. maybe.
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Old 02-28-2010, 02:46 PM
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keep your email private.
achapinguy, is there anyway you can change your email addy?
just a thought. maybe.
Yes, I've just not done it because just about everyone I know has this as my email address not just the people listed in my email contacts. I also have a box of business cards with that email address on them. It is also tied into other social network sites. As much of a nightmare that this PTO member has turned out to be, it would be an even bigger nightmare to change that email address. Yes folks, I've learned my lesson. Sometimes you don't know who the crazy ones are until they flip!...andy
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Old 02-28-2010, 05:49 PM
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I think the good lesson in this is that while you might *think* you know people you meet online, the truth is you really don't. I have no idea if your name is really Andy, if you are really a man or if you work in a oil change company. For all I know your name is Penelope, are a female and work in a bicycle repair shop. I'm not saying YOu are lying Andy, I'm just illustrating a point.

There are LESS than a handful of people here that I would give me personal information to and even then, it's a secondary email that my outside life wouldn't be impacted by if I shut it down. My name is TEE for all intensive purposes and straight up... that's all people here need to know.

Sorry but, you never know who you are dealing with online. I hope this person moves on and leaves you alone eventually - you seem like a very nice person and you don't deserve the drama...
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Old 02-28-2010, 08:59 PM
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Andy, I've been on PTO for years and years, and there are only 5 or 6 people I've given contact info to. I trust relatively few, and most of what needs to be done can be done here, without further exposure. There have been many who have given me their real names and info, but only because I have needed it to send books to. And I don't even keep those.
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Old 03-01-2010, 10:19 AM
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I understand what your saying Andy. I too do not want to change email accts even tho if I got a different internet provider my costs would be cheaper. Ive had the one I have now, since forever.
(probably about 10 yrs!)
Well, its too bad this happened.
Hopefully they will get tired of the game.
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Old 03-01-2010, 06:12 PM
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So, let's drag this all out in the open shall we?

People get banned or suspended for things that are very serious. We do not just exclude people willy nilly for trivial matters.
Andy you paint a slightly different picture to the one we perceived.

I suggest that you let this matter drop now. Your posting privileges have been restored. Your friends are gathered around you and all is good.

Let's move on.

Thank you.

Rachel
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Old 03-01-2010, 09:47 PM
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Welcome back Andy. I was wondering what happened to you. My son gave me an update.
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