Please help my step-son with his emotions

meganyg18 · #1 09-11-2003, 01:46 PM

My husband went into prison just this last week for a parole violation. His son 15 had just moved in with us to get away from the gangs in So. Cali. everything was going great until the day his dad went to jail. His son is used to it by now, all of this life his dad had been in and out until recently when they became a true father and son. My husbands family is telling him that his dad is in prison for life (because he has 2 strikes), and that he is staying with the wrong person meening me. I love having my step-son with me and i have told him that if he no longer would like to live with me i would understand (even though i would be heart broken). I tell him everyday that i love him and that his dad does also. When his dads family calls and tells him about his dad and his 3rd strike a call right then and there to county and ask for the charges just so he will know that his dad is coming back home. It breaks my heat everytime i see him cry....or when i hear him crying at night. I know that he is thinking how can my dad want me to change and he cant even change himself. It is so hard especially when he has people calling with untrue negative news. If you have any helpful hints please reply.
Megan

Amelia · #2 09-16-2003, 10:23 PM

I am not sure but maybe even though he is "used" to it he really isn't ya know...if you are someone he will talk I woto have a heart to heart with him, keep his father very involved in his life.or maybe have someone else talk with him. you may want to limit the contact between the family and your step-son and remind him that eventhough his father is going back does not mean that he doesn't want the best for him..and that he will be coming home!! I am not sure what else to tell you --my expereince is with the younger kids..I do commend you for being such a wonderful step-MOTHER!!!! Let your stepson know we are all routing for him to get his life together and stay on the right track!!

Deanna4Mom · #3 09-17-2003, 01:38 AM

Have you told these relatives that they are devastating this child? What do they have to gain by destroying his hope and plans to have a better relationship with his father? Sometimes our parents have to go through unimaginable trials to provide an example or lesson to their children Maybe seeing this he will want to try harder to change and stay out of trouble because of what he has watched his father go through. I think you are an incredible mother for taking on all of the responsibility. Be strong and tell your son all of the good things about his father as much as you can and send some proof to these relatives of the real sentence so that they can stop torturing this boy. God Bless you and you are in my prayers!!!
deanna

meganyg18 · #4 09-18-2003, 02:49 PM

thank you so much for the reply. Since I had posted the letter, i think his family has gotten my point in leaving us alone. It is hard since we have not heard from his father but we will make it.....

Megan

RubyGem91 · #5 10-14-2003, 04:17 PM

Hey Megan,

My name is katie. I am 12 years old. Okay i read your post and it brought me to tears. That is how i feel all the time. Listen i know im only 12 and hes 15 but i have alot of the same feelings he has. If its okay with him i will talk to him?? im really sweet and im always there to talk to. well if im not online then if someone emails me there guarnteed 2 get an email back within 2 hours... so PM me or post or whatever!
Let me know what he says
Love,
Katie

meganyg18 · #6 10-15-2003, 04:22 PM

i will think about it.....thank you for your reply!!!!! Since then things have become much better, i think it was the not knowing that was hardest.
megan