How long will my daddy be in prison?

RubyGem91 · #1 09-06-2003, 07:38 PM

Hey Everyone,

Its Katie.... My stepdaddy is in prison for being a supposdly sex offender.... well i was wondering if he was gonna even serve out the whole 5-15 years... Alot of people are saying he isnt even gonna serve 5.. but my mom thinks he is gonna get the maximum. I dont know which 1 to think becausE i am only 12 and im still tryin to cope with him being in prison for something he didnt do. I wish he was here right now. But if someone you know was a sex offender how long was s/he in for?? did they serve out the minimum or the maximum??

PLEASE POST BACK!!!!
thanks,
Katie:fb:

Mommy
+
Daddy B
4-ever

Zelda50 · #2 09-08-2003, 07:23 PM

I know a lot of people in your situation and I wish there were an easy answer but there is not! Some people serve the minimum. Some serve the maximum. It's difficult not knowing exactly when he'll be home. You might ask your family who it is who decides how long it will be. A parole board? Parole boards sometimes decide and you could find out when they meet to decide. That would give you some idea maybe. What I've found is to just take it a day or month at a time and not worry too much about how long it will be. Write letters or send drawings and the time goes by. I know people always ask me "how long" before my husband comes home. I don't know how long so the question makes me feel uncomfortable. It helps to find someone you can trust to talk with about your feelings. A teacher, a friend, a counselor. Or write in a journal - that might help too. Good luck! You sound like a very caring person. Zelda

RubyGem91 · #3 09-08-2003, 07:35 PM

Zelda,

Hello!! Thanks for the information. I have been writing to the prole boards alot. My mommy said it makes Brian look good because im writing about how good of a father he was to me and how im still gonna change my last name to his because of how much i love him. I still believe he didnt do ANY of this i KNOW he didnt do any of this!!! its not fair that he is going through this. I know usually Kids hate there stepparents from start to end. But my sisters and I have a STRONG bond with Brian and we LOVE him he is a diffrent kind of stepdad he was nice and generous. and no matter howmuch we got on his nerves he never yelled...
Katie

fabulous · #4 09-08-2003, 11:48 PM

Zelda has some good advice for you. I just wanted to say hang in there and he is lucky to have you in his life.

QQin4meboo · #5 09-09-2003, 01:06 AM

okay i am not sure , if mommy is writing for her or not !

but i have kids , we have folks we know , ect in jail or prison , i am 36 three kids , and my kids would never access this site , ( nothing wrong with site my kids are 10~~8~6~~ i watch all they do , if i was typing what one said i would state that ,,

i was concieved and born while my mom visited my dada , blood test proved it , IN CALI AT DA SQ ]
I HAVE BEEN TO DA ROCK QUEENS , I HAVE BEEN HERE AND THERE ,

BUT NOW I AM HOME WITH MY KIDS , WHOM I CHOSE AFTER I , GOT MY SHEEESH 2 GETHER !! AND I AM A PRODUCTIVE CITIZEN , ( TAXIN ME YEP THEY ARE )

MY KIDS HAVE NO INTERNET ACCESS , UNLESS I AM HERE AND WILL FULL STATE , MY KID IS TYPING WITH ME ,

shell021001 · #6 09-09-2003, 05:43 AM

QQ,

so are you calling me a liar and that my mom is writing this for me..

Zelda50 · #7 09-09-2003, 11:34 AM

I think that pre-teens and teens do access sites like this and are often unsupervised on the internet. Hopefully, they have been taught the "safety rules" of not sharing personal information with strangers and reporting any inappropriate comments that are made to them. Whether or not a parent is with them while they type doesn't really have to be disclosed, I don't think. It all depends upon the parents' rules and trust of the youth. I would hope we would all respond to a young person respectfully and report anyone posting inappropriate comments to them. And to the youth posting here - you don't have to tell people whether your parent is doing this with you or not. It's none of their business. Let them guess all they want. (It may be their way of finding out if you're doing this alone, which they don't need to know.) Zelda

shell021001 · #8 09-09-2003, 01:51 PM

***QQ Looks like Katie accidentally posted under my name in her last post...but just to clarify things, I am Katie's mom. Yes I know she is on this site and that she posted this. She asked me questions, and I told her to post and maybe get some support and some answers to her questions. I don't expect people to talk down to her or treat her with disrespect because she is a preteen. You now have my Screen name, so feel free to PM me personally if you have a problem with my daughter using this site. She is going thru alot and just looking for some support from people who are in her situation (or one similar).

OK i'll step down off my soap box for now.

Thanks Zelda for sticking up for my daughter, I do appreciate it!!!

Michelle

RubyGem91 · #9 09-09-2003, 03:14 PM

Fabulous,

Hey Thanks for the comment. Yes I think he is really lucky to have my sisters and my mom as well. I have been trying to hang in there.. Thats what everyone is tellingme. I mean i know i should. But its really hard!! I dont see why Brian has to be in for something he didnt do... its not fair to him, to us, or to my mom just because his ex wife is the way she is. My mom has only been married not even a year before this all happend to him... it was there 1st year anniversry on Sunday September 7. What a great way to start off a marriage huh??

Katie

QQin4meboo · #10 09-09-2003, 03:28 PM

I ASSURE U MY COMMENTS WERE SINCERE , I have three children of my own , and i am very cautious about what they do , NOT because i dont teach them right and wrong , BUT because others ARE SOME BAD FOLKS !!

OF COURSE ,, I applaud the fact that she ( or u and both ) are trying to have open honest discussions , about the situation with brian , i commend her for standing up ,

but i still think , openly reading some of the things on this board , are not for children , if they are unsupervised ,
thats my opinion , o

RubyGem91 · #11 09-09-2003, 09:45 PM

QQ,

yeah well thats you opinion. i know u were just stating it.. But maybe opinions like that can get people mad.. so its better to keep comments like that to yourself. Yeah so what i am a pre-teen. Does it matteR? i only go onto "children with parents in prison" its not like i go into others, even though im aloud to i dont. I mean i guess that if you have a problem with me posting. talk to my mom about it. because i dont appreciate being looked down on and mis treated like that. Ya know its not like im gonna stop just because you are very cautious about YOUR children being online. but you dont need to be cautious about me because IM NOT YOUR CHILD. Well i guess thats all i should say for right now..

Katie

P.S. Zelda Thank you so much for sticking up for me!!!!! i reallly appreciate it!

Zelda50 · #12 09-10-2003, 07:19 PM

I know it must be an awful feeling when you think about your stepdad being in prison for something he didn't do. I know I feel the worst about things that I just have no control over. My mom used to say that sometimes it is not a matter of understanding - just acceptance that we can't change it. Meaning we just have to accept sometimes things we cannot control and leave it up to the grownups to work on changing things. The one things we DO have control over is ourselves and changing the way we react to circumstances. Like, instead of being mad about what's happened, we can try to see what we can do today, just today, to help ourselves. Like you can list four things each day, for five days, that you are thankful for. Then send your lists to your stepdad after five days. He will see 20 things you're thankful for and that will make him happy when you share that with him. Then maybe he'll think of things he's thankful for. Or spend 20 minutes with your mom, making funny hair styles with your hair and making her laugh. It won't change the big problem of your stepdad being in prison but you can't change that anyway. You can change what you do with YOUR life. Hope this helps. Zelda

louise1120 · #13 10-04-2003, 10:53 PM

Hi Katie,
It was refreshing to read your posts. I have 2 children and my brother is in a texas prison. My brother wants to see me and his niece and newphew, but he put me through alot of hurt and I dont know yet if we will visit. But i commend you for doing what your doing, keep writing those letters, I know your Moms very proud of you and hopefully your Dad will be home soon.

Love, Louise

RubyGem91 · #14 10-05-2003, 08:18 AM

Louise1120,

Hi, Im sure you know my mom... shell021001 right? Thats my mommy!!! Anyways thanks for the support. how old are your children? Yes i could understand not going if he put you through alot.. what did he put you through? if you dont want to tell me thats alright. i will understand.

Love,
KaTiE

Amelia · #15 10-06-2003, 12:11 PM

just wanted to remind everyone to keep a supportive and loving attitude...no matter what we are all here to lvoe and support eachother in our time of need and everyone is entilted to an opinion.

Love to All,
Amelia