UNCENSORED FROM TEXAS DEATH ROW
by Paul Colella
March 21-28, 2002
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March 21
Well the madness has started. We found out why the warden and all of them ran down here yesterday. They say they found a shank (knife) in Chitowns cell yesterday. He says it wasn't his. They found it in a crack between 2 cells. They had to pull paint and chalking out of the crack to get to it. We don't have access to paint and chalking so if they did actually get it out of his cell it's likely it's been there for a long while. I personally think they are only saying it to try and justify these harassment shakedowns. As I said the cracks in these walls go all the way through to the next cell. So even had they found it in that crack it could have been found from inside the other cell too. There is also the possibility it's been there before. Before we came here to this section it was full of administrative segregation rival gang members from population. There is any number of possibilities. I personally think that it was a plant because they are some devious guards. We are not angels this is true, but I've seen some guards who do make us look like angels. Anyway now we know why they were all down here yesterday.
Now let me try to explain a couple of things. As is apparent we here are under a sentence of death. Obvious right? Most of us have a lot of legal papers, transcripts, motions, writs, orders, etc. We have no means of keeping our legal work organized other than stacking it in order. This legal work represents our life. It is vital information which can only be replaced at a very high cost and even then some things cannot even be replaced.
So when this legal material is violated in any fashion they are in effect playing with our lives. Saying they don't mean anything to them. It might not mean anything to them, but it sure means something to me and if at any time they violate it I will go off no matter if I have TV, commissary etc. If they play with my life I will fight for it. Another thing we all feel very strongly about are our family photographs. These are our memories which we hold very dear violate at extreme risk. Both of these things were strewn about my cell yesterday like they just dumped them out of the bag and spread it all over. That was wrong on all counts with no justification whatsoever.
Today I didn't even want to move when I woke up. My whole body is sore. I got a contraband mirror (we can't even have a plastic mirror) to look at myself from someone. I have a big bruise on my forehead where I hit the ground yesterday. My eye looks awesome purple and blue and black and chest, OW!! my ribs, just all over and all because of stuff they had no business tearing up in the first place.
Just went to Kangaroo court. I now owe $30,25 for destruction of state property. I still have a few dollars left from everyone's donations last time. Again Thank you! I also got 15 days cell restriction for refusing to come off the rec yard March 16 and 4 days cell restriction for refusing to shave. Whoopee!! I'm crushed! (smile)
March 22
Now, to feed, chow, shower or go anywhere they have a video camera on at all times, for training purposes. So nothing is going on (smile). We sure don't want to be a part of helping them train their officers. Even when they give us clean clothes the camera is on. What a joke.
Today the old body just don't want to function properly. Have difficulty writing because my hand is so sore but what hurts worse is my ribs and my toe. The bruise on my big toe went all the way over to my little toe and it hurts. But it will heal in a few days.
March 23
Forgot to mention: yesterday when we showered Sgt. Poole was supervising. Of course the camera was on when they took us out to shower. Once we're in the shower they turn it off till they come to put us back in the cell. So when we shower they of course go to search our cells. I got to give Sgt. Poole, Officers Ramirez and Balaton credit. They were respectful of our property, done a thorough search without throwing stuff around or destroying property, so I'm grateful for that because I'm tired of reorganizing my legal papers and pictures (we can't buy photo albums on Level III).
Received some very heart-warming news last night in the mail. Nanon Williams, a convict here on Level I is going to try and organize a 60 day lockdown for Death Row. This will be an inmate imposed lockdown which will entail no recreation ? no showers ? no commissary except for stamps and hygiene i.e. soap, shampoo etc. And most important no communication with any guard for any reason except to show them IDs for mail, count and visits. He will be circulating an article about it. So keep your eye out for it. It will start May 1 to July 1. So please encourage your friend/loved one to take part in this non violent action to try and bring attention to this hell we live in.
We'll see who is on the harassment list today.
9:34 pm ? There's a real asshole working in the control picket tonight. He has been agitating us all night by turning this broken light on and off. All it does is Buzz "Load" like an alarm clock and he would turn the intercom system on and it goes beep every 15-30 seconds. Then sit in the picket and laugh just being a real asshole, Officer Bogosin.
I was on shakedown, it came out peacefully so it's overall been a quiet day.
Thought to go to sleep on:
"Without courage, all other virtues lose their meaning."
- Winston Churchill -
March 24
10:00 a.m. ? I think they are just trying to piss me off. Lunchtime. Johnny. I get 2 peanut butter sandwiches and 4 prunes while the other 3 got 2 hot dogs on buns and 1 peanut butter sandwich and a handful of prunes, so I show Sgt. Poole and he gets it right. Goes himself and gets me 2 hot dogs.
Now for some reason they put our names on the bags. That's a sure sign they want each individual to get a certain sack. Why if all sacks are suppose to be the same? Could it be they have diabolic plans for one of us? Am I just paranoid? I don't think so because I know they are some vindictive people that work here.
I have been reading 2 very interesting books. One is called "Prison Madness" by Dr. Terry Kupers. It's a clinical insight into our penal system use of units like this which drive men over the edge of sanity. He details why a lot of prisoners loose their minds and what can be done to avoid it. Very, very interesting. The other book is called "Prison Masculinities". It deals with the male in prison, his thought process and why he does the things he does. It's a very disturbing but real look at the world inside prison BUT I saw/experienced very little of what's talked about here on D/R. This is/has been a world in itself and the whole male structure of thinking is different. Don't get me wrong a lot of what he (Don Sabo and contributing authors) speak about has went on but not on the same level. It's more subtle. The books are very good though, recommended reading to anyone who wants a fairly accurate insight into prison life. Parental discretion is advised.
We found out something else they have been screwing us on. From the Disciplinary rules and procedures Pg. 8 # 3 Death row Once the 90 day limit is reached, additional cell restriction and/or loss of recreation privileges may not be imposed until after the cumulative 90 day term has been served or lifted. They have been stacking more on top of the 90. I have been on restriction since Dec. 13. Hank has been on it since last September. Chi, DW, Rick, SoulJA, all of us. Well I pointed it out to the substitute counsel and he says I'm right. Now they must recalculate all of our cell restriction. I don't know how it will work but I'll let you know.
March 25
I just got my hands on a copy of a reply from the TDCJ Ombudsman's office and it took all my willpower to keep from just cussing and yelling. These are some lowlife lying people who need to be stuck on Death Row to experience the hell we live.
Every day a work program is not in effect TDCJ is violating a court order period. No shortage of staff, would be up to the board. They are violating a court order.
It says "It is the policy of the TDCJ to provide a NON PUNITIVE status for D/R offenders. Yet we are housed in a building designed for punitive segregation. Population has TV, why don't we? Because we're under punitive ad seg status, population has arts and crafts. Why don't we? Population gets "hot" meals, "clean" clothes, access to educational programs, religious services, why don't we? Because we are under punitive ad seg. Non Punitive, my ass. Non Punitive.
That's got to be the joke of the century. The letter also says: "While offenders can choose to create a disturbance, this does not mean that they will receive privileges/conditions they are wanting. The agency does monitor the medical well being of these offenders, however the offenders do not set policy within the agency." For one thing IF DEATH ROW all Death Row would put aside fear of retaliation and speak up, create disturbances (hypothetically), something would change. They are full of it to think not. Those of us who are creating a disturbance are not asking for any special treatment. We want what we're suppose to have. We don't want to make or set policy. We want existing policy to be followed. These people don't monitor our well being. That's bullcrap. Ask why they are so quick to snap photos after a use of force. Because bruises don't show up that fast. They don't monitor anything.
"Lockdowns are not initiated to punish offenders but to insure the safety of offenders and staff." BULLSHIT! And more bullshit. This unit has been open about 10 years or so??? In that time people have jacked the recreation yards about 1 time a day on average. The only reason we were locked down is because they were punishing us for protesting. There has been only 2 acts of violence on our part and that was me on January 31, when they beat Rick. We haven't been violent at all just a pain in their hypocritical asses. At no time had we been a threat to the security of the institution or the safety of the officers. All of our actions had been to simply refuse to move which caused them to resort to violence, not us. There has never been a serious disruption in the operation of the unit. We were locked in a cage behind a steal door, that's in a cage, that's behind two more steel doors, two gates and a control picket and yet another steel door, two chain link fences and hundreds of guards before we even have access to another gate that leads to the rest of the institution. Where is the threat??? This is strictly a punishment lockdown.
In her last paragraph Donna Brown says "TDCJ-ID strives to hire competent, responsible, ethical staff."
HA! HA! HA!
Hire anyone who don't have a SERIOUS criminal record. They hire out of the welfare lines and one officer I spoke to said he was homeless and saw a notice at the Salvation Army soup line that TDCJ was hiring. Guards do not even have to have a high school diploma to work
here. TDCJ will school them. Their training academy is 6 weeks where they DON'T receive any special training to deal with death row. There is no background check other than a criminal history check. This woman is insane to spout such complaints to the office of the inspector generals office. Those people all work for the state and are not going to be individuals. Puppets on a string. They will do what they are told to do and like it.They don't have any choice.
Okay, gotta stop here, I'm upset. More later.
2:37 pm ? Okay, I've had a bit of time to cool off but it didn't do much good at all. Grin and bear it. I just reread the letter again. I can't believe how these people lie to cover their butts. At one point on Donna Browns letter she mentions staffing being so low. Now we go into prison bureaucracy. The reason staff is so low is because Warden Zeller has pissed a bunch of them off with his B.S. Then we must look at the low pay rate. The Texas prison system is a billion dollar industry founded on inmate/slave labor. Since there is no one to pay to do all the work, where does all the $$$$ go? The money goes into the bureaucrats pockets, that's where. It
sure isn't going to hire staff. With such low pay rates it's a wonder any guards work here. A billion dollar self sustaining profitable industry that doesn't pay the ones who make them all the money can not adequately pay guards ? I don't understand that at all.
I just got my classification level paper, signed by Major Lester, Lt. Price and Lt. Roach. "Remain L-3 for recent staff assault." I haven't had a staff assault in almost 2 months. Last months paper said "Remain L-3 for recent disciplinary violations." Who determines "recent"?
6:11 pm ? Seems Warden Massey isn't a man of his word. He told us he would call us out and talk to us today and he hasn't called any one out. Guess he just said it to say it.
7:01 pm ? They just moved Bronco Bobby Hopkins back to Level III.
Here is a list of all Level III:
F-Section
83 ? Douglas Feldman
81 ? Rich Cartwright
80 ? Hank Skinner
79 ? Daryl Wheatfall
78 ? Kenny Parr
76 ? Paul Colella
74 ? Tommie Hughes
73 ? Leon Dorsey IV
72 ? Rick Rhoades
E-Section
70 ? Raymond Martinez
69 ? Victor Saldano
66 ? Lonnie Pursley
65 ? Michael Blue
62 ? Bobby Hopkins
61 ? Charles Mines
59 ? Gilmar Guevera
58 ? Robert Thompson
57 ? Elkie Taylor
I'll try to keep this list updated. I cant keep up with L-Z.
March 26
Today me, Rick, Chi Town are on week 2, day 2. They let DW off lockdown status so there are only three of us left now. Quiet day, nothing to report.
Tomorrow is shower day. Thought so. We shall see what transpires. Just had a brief visit from Warden Zeller. He stopped by my cell to let me know that a friend of mine, Diane in England, called to check up my well being yesterday. He told me he didn't have to let me know but that he told her he would. Turned and walked away.
Today is the last protest day for outside. We have finally made some people mad, made a lot glad but the main thing is we have shown unity where none was seen before and that's very important.
7:50 am ? Officer Brown and another officer just came to get Rick to talk to Warden Massey. The officer in the picket stopped them and said they needed a supervisor and a camera to take him out. Brown said the warden sent him down here. Blah Blah. So Brown left and came back with Captain Bacon and they took Rick out. Let ya all know what's said later. I'm glad Massey kept his appointment. Even if it is a couple of days late. A line of communication needs to be open at all times because communication is imperative to any type of resolutions to our problems. Even when one of them top people come down here during an incident it's hard to get a decent dialogue going because we're already aggravated and they come down with an attitude so nothing is ever resolved like that. Two angry men butting heads will never get anything positive done.
This morning at breakfast they told DW he was still on lockdown. He has been off lockdown for 2 days. So tempers flare words are exchanged. Ends up the paperwork which they see as god (infallible) was wrong. They finally got it right after a couple of hours.
They brought Rick back and came to get me. I went down there and we discussed several issues which can be taken care of on unit level such as food, classification, clothes, phone calls, special visits. He assured me that he would check into all we discussed and make sure that if we were cool that classification will be run by policy and they wouldn't keep their foot on our necks. When we decide to be good. That is yet to be seen. He mainly just wanted to pacify us. There's not a lot he can do personally. He has two wardens above him but he seemed sincere in saying he would look into the thing we discussed. He talked to Chitowns also.
After speaking to Chi and Rick it's obvious that he used the same lines on all of us. Chitown asked him about mirrors and he said the reason we can't have them is because shanks (knifes) can be made out of them. It's a lame excuse because even if it were big enough to make a knife out of so could a spoon or a pen. There are many potential weapons and mirrors rank very low on the list. Then again they used to sell us mirrors that were not much thicker than a couple pieces of paper. Don't know why TDCJ stopped selling them. (frown)
Yesterday and today they shut down recreation for all Death Row. Why? Because a maintenance crew is on the building, fixing lights and doors. Now lets check this out. The maintenance crew can only be on one pod at a time, yet all six pods are shut down. It makes no sense at all because maintenance is always on the building at sometime or another so they have just messed over everyone on recreation and will not make it up. Since maintenance can only be on one pod at a time, why are all pods shut down? Makes TDCJ sense. Per Major Lester. We are told.
I also received an I-60 back from substitute Counsel Kunkle. I wrote and asked: "Mr. Kunkle. How is this recalculation of cell restriction going to work? I've been on it continually since December 2001. Some others also. Can you explain?
His replay:
We have been advised that effective 8 April 02. Those who have exceeded 90 days recreation/cell restriction will have punishment set aside and start fresh from there. 0 to 90 use all of it and then do it over again. Reason for 8 April 02 is change has to be made to the program for the future so that takes a little time or so I'm told.
Stay cool. R. Kunkle CSI
So it seems that on April 8 me, Chi Town, Rick, Hank and DW should have our restrictions lifted and start fresh. We shall see what April 8 holds. That's a Monday, Level III normal recreation day so we should get it.
I'm also putting a couple of grievances I filed so you can see the responses we get:
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Now this is a dead issue because I won't do anything yet. There's no one higher to appeal to.
Also I am ending with a letter to Warden Chance. It is a public apology for my actions on January 12, 2002. One man is not the cause of our hardships, only a part of the system that is and though I don't like his attitude, my actions were wrong. I'm man enough to admit that.
That's it for this time
In struggle and solidarity
Paul Colella
# 999045
Polunsky Unit
3872 FM 350 South
Livingston, Texas 77351
USA
Email:
paul@deathrow.at
Warden Chance,
First of all I want to say I have no personal animosity towards you as a man. It is the system you represent and are a part of that my anger and frustration is at ends with. Some people think I was not sincere in my article "Animal Instincts" when I spoke of my shame at my actions. I truly am sorry to have went to that level and it's taken some very deep self reflection to realize just how low I stooped because for one you had not personally done anything to me. For that I apologize. # 2 I look back and realize you were on your way to talk to me. For that I apologize. And then to antagonize you publicly was wrong and I apologize.
Your not a stupid man or you wouldn't be where you are so I know that you understand my anger and frustration at my situation. I cannot expect you to forgive or even put aside your resentment at my actions but I do ask you to understand the why of it. Your definitely a better man than I am because if it had been me I would not have been able to control myself as you did. Your anger was well founded.
I am making this a public apology simply for the fact I humiliated you and derided you publicly. As I said all I ask for is your understanding of the situation.
Sincere in an apology
Paul Richard Colella
"Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable."
- John F. Kennedy -
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Paul Colella # 999045
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Uncensored From Death Row #13
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