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View Poll Results: How long have you or had you used meth?
0-3months 84 7.94%
6mo-1year 75 7.09%
1year and then some 299 28.26%
why would I do that(never) 600 56.71%
Voters: 1058. You may not vote on this poll

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  #26  
Old 08-31-2004, 06:55 PM
JayandMe JayandMe is offline
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HaHa....I don't even know what meth looks like let alone tryed it! I never really hear anything about that in Canada......but I'm sure we have it here too?????
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  #27  
Old 08-31-2004, 07:00 PM
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Be very proud of the fact that your clean today. As a alcoholic/addict in recovery for 18 years now, the struggle to stay clean is easier than in the beginning, but there are times that I think hard about getting just a "hit". Maybe it's a good thing I have alot of bills, I have nice stuff and keep telling myself I don't want to lose it. I just can't afford to mess up and lose everything I've struggled for all this time. Keep up the good work girl....I'll keep you in my thoughts.
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  #28  
Old 08-31-2004, 07:01 PM
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I've been clean for about 7 years... It's really hard work, trust me, I've been there... but stay strong... life only gets better...{{{huggs}}}
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  #29  
Old 09-01-2004, 12:05 AM
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the biggest challenge is chosing your friends wisely and having enough courage to say no to people you feel really are not going to be a beneficial part of your sober recovery because once you have been caught up in that drug world for so long those kind of people are the only friends you know. Changing cities will really help and even states. Ron and I have decided to move from East Mesa to Phoenix and eventually out of state. I know it will be a huge change and hard at first but together we can do it.
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  #30  
Old 09-04-2004, 11:46 PM
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Default me too

I was clean for two weeks until tonight.... I know exactly what you're going through. That was one of many attempts to quit. I have been high for 5 years now. PM if you need anything or want to talk!
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  #31  
Old 09-20-2004, 11:43 AM
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it gets better.....pretty soon the dope dreams will afford you some gratitude, upon awakening, that it's only a dream and not reality.......(some times I have dreams I am in a meeting~smile~ most of us have drinking/using dreams for, I guess ,ever
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  #32  
Old 09-21-2004, 12:27 PM
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I have spent 22 years in addictions, about 8 total years (on and off) addicted to meth.

If you are having a hard time still, you may want to talk to a doctor and get on some medications. You may have other problems than just Post Acute Withdrawal.
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  #33  
Old 10-05-2004, 10:13 AM
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I am right with you.... I am now AGAIN back on the wagon - the longest I've made it so far was 29 days... I see what it is doing to everyone around me and to myself. I know that if I want the things I truly desire in life - I have to let it go. If not - I will not only lose myself and my family, I will lose my best friend who is in for 180 days due to it and won't be able to be around it, my hunny is clean now and he has to walk away from everything he knew before he went in or he will just end up back in - including me if I don't get my shit straight. It is a bitch to clean up from.... but I gotta do it. The difference for me this time is now I quit talking about it and I am now getting active about getting and staying clean. I have gotten rid of all my "things", dropped contact with all that are still using as they will just drag me back in right now, I quit staring at my recovery workbook from lifering.com and am now actually working it, I read my one day at a time from NA each and everyday..... I have the desire again.... sure it is easy to say as I only have a week under my belt this time.... but here's to my 30 days - then my 90 and so on and so on... better yet... here's to staying clean TODAY. Good luck to you - it is a long hard road.... but the end of this road is true freedom....
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  #34  
Old 10-05-2004, 12:23 PM
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Babylove,
Girl I understand what you are going through not from personal use but because I went through all of that with my man. When I first met him all he did was smoke bud , but gradually he fell back into old haibts and started with the meth again.
When he was on it I hated him . He was a totally diffrent person. When he was on meth I was being everybody , lying , sneeking aroung and to him I was being funny style with my ways.When we/I would be going to sleep he would wake me becuase he would be hearing noises:shake: or he would said that he would see demons:fb: in our room.He finally got his head out of his a** and relized what it was doing to himself but also to our family . He has now been clean for 5 months , and I am very proud of him .
I never used meth , but I did use speed , for about 2-2 1/2 years , but I am now clean for 3 years . If people were to ask me if I regret it , I would honestly have to say no because it was a learning experience for me and what doesn't kill you will only make you stronger.Some of us have to go through things like think I guess to learn and grow !
But you deserve a for acknowledging you had a problem and deciding to quit not just for yourself but for your baby.Good luck and don't give up nomatter how it is. If you ever need to talk PM me sometime. Keep us Posted!
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  #35  
Old 10-05-2004, 06:02 PM
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I am also a recovering drug addict and alcoholic. I quit all drugs 7 years ago and alcohol 3. Meth was never my drug of choice cuz it always made me sooo sick but I did do it for a long time. As for drugs and alcohol I too had to cut all ties, friends boyfriend everyone. I even moved to a different town cuz you cant even be in a place that you know where to get it cuz its so easy to say oh I'll just stop by and see if they have a little bit. People say you shouldnt run from your problems but if you have to run until your strong enough to say NO then so be it run forest run. I can go to my home town now without even thinking about drugs, without wanting to go to the bar I can even hang out with old friends cuz I am strong enough to say NO.
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  #36  
Old 10-17-2004, 10:16 PM
babylove babylove is offline
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I have been clean for almost 5 months now. Its been hard dealing with the strong after affects, my unstable mental illness/ personality disorders, and my fiancee in prison. I have started to taste it in my mouth as of late. I can see my self smoking it or snorting it and it takes me back. I also find my self inadversitly grinding my teeth, which was always my nasty habit when I was high. I am afraid that when my daughter is born my taste for it will grow to strong and overtake me to the point that I make myself sick without it. My fiancee will be out by then and hes an addict too, I cazn only hope we can be strong for each other and that some classes will help. Will this ever end?
Tana
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  #37  
Old 10-17-2004, 11:03 PM
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((((hugs))))
Congrats on your 5 Months!!! that is an amazing feat. It sounds like you are going through a period right around 5-6 Months which is common to have what you are describing called cravings. I am not sure if you belong to any group or not, but I would
highly recommend some type of 12 step support group. NA- Narcotics anonymous.
This support will help you get through the cravings that will come and go and
I am not sure if they will ever fully go away because even after 7 1/2 years of recovery I still once in a while still get cravings, but I have learned and picked
up tools that get me through rough spots.

Keep up the good work.
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  #38  
Old 10-18-2004, 07:43 AM
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Congrats on making 5 months!! I hope I can make it there... it seems lately I do good to make it 5 days!! But it does give me hope to see others who are going through similar... unless you've been there specifically with this demon you don't understand it... sucks. I've done other things before and been around people who have and this one is all its own..... With a 98% return rate it seems the odds are stacked against us... but when I see those who have and are recovering from it...it speaks louder than statistics!! Congratulations to you and I wish you the very best. I hope one day I can join the ranks!! Fingers crossed!!
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  #39  
Old 10-18-2004, 08:06 AM
itscindergirl itscindergirl is offline
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I am an ex offender from texas and went down for meth. I can tell you that before i went to prison i weighed 99 lbs and am 5'4" not good. but I thought i looked great. My ex was a cook it was everywhere. When I went to prison and got my head back on i realized just what I had done. Well i ask not to be paroled back to my home because of that reason and guess what that is just where they sent me. So once again it was there everywhere I went to my parole officer and ask to move but before i could get out they busted the house and once again i was caught up in the mess. Luckily my parole office kept me out of prison but I am doing a 3 years probation after doing my parole. Nothing is worth your freedom NOTHING not love not promises NOTHING and that is what you will lose if you start again. Move forward and be a mother your child can be prous of and always remember where you came from and get help with the problem that took you to drugs and there is one believe me you just have to get into counseling to find out what it is, good luck and god bless
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  #40  
Old 10-18-2004, 08:30 PM
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First let me say...I am VERY proud of you, I too am a recovering addict! I promise you it will eventually get better, meth affects everyone differently so, maybe you should seek professional help, they will be able to determine the best method for your recovery. I sincerely hope you are not anywhere near anybody that chooses to use, putting it down and leaving it alone is the hardest part. The urge is strong, it controls your will. I had to leave all the "old" friends and the "old" places just to stay away from it. I hope you have a strong support group, because love, you will need it.
I will pray for you and your baby, PLEASE PM if you wanna talk......
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  #41  
Old 10-18-2004, 08:56 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by babylove
Relapsing after the baby is born is gonna be the hardest thing not to do and the scariest thought, also my fiancee has been struggling with this drug since he was 15 and hes 21 now, keeping him sober through support will help.
I am a recovering crack addict and when I found out I was pregnant I tried to quit and relapsed a few times during my pregnancy and went to treatment during my last tri-mester with true intentioions for success, I had hit rock-bottom. In all the world I never thought I would hurt my unborn child in that way, of course that was before I picked up the pipe for the first time. Everyone said my challanges lie ahead when the baby is born. That baby has been a miracle and my blessing from God. I still think about using but all I have to do is look at that face and my urge goes away. Don't get me wrong I have to work at it to by going to meetings..... I know if I relapse, I will loose my precious little girl, the most important thing in my life and I will fight those deamons with everything I have. I have been clean for 11 months and am very lucky to have a beautiful, healthy baby.

I tried meth once when I got out of highschool about 15 years ago and had an allergic reaction to it and vowed I would never put anything up my nose ever again including cocaine which after the meth experience I was scared to death to ever try, I kept that promise not to put anything up my nose, it took me 13 years to come accross coke and so I thought smoking wouldn't be that bad to try once or twice......

I wish you the best of luck, hang in there. A program does work, you just have to go - please feel free to PM me if you need to talk, vent or need someone to listen.
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  #42  
Old 10-18-2004, 10:38 PM
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PrincessMeagan PrincessMeagan is offline
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I hope you are strong enough to stay away from meth. If not for yourself at least for your baby. My boyfriend's legal problems all have to do with meth in one way or the other. He's been bangin meth since he was 15 (he's 21 now). I HATE THAT DRUG. It is evil and people don't understand that the first time you do meth is the only time you will ever get that "high", from then on you just have to keep doing more and more of it hoping to get that first high once again. I am 24 and am very proud to say that I have never done a single drug in my life (even though some say smoking is a drug.) I recomend getting the book "Clear body, clear mind" by L. Ron Hubbord. My boyfriend finally got clean because of that book. It tells you what you need to do to get the meth out of your system. Most people think that once you stop doing it, it's gone but in reality it isn't and it stays in your system and thats why people relapse.

If you want the book, I have a copy that belongs to my boyfriend and will send it to you. PM me if you'd like the book or just to talk.

Congrats on your being clean and I hope you stay that way. God bless.
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  #43  
Old 10-19-2004, 12:37 AM
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Thanks everyone for believing in me and I will keep all those still struggling in my prayers and hope for the best..love you all
Tana
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  #44  
Old 10-19-2004, 07:23 AM
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Thumbs down Meth the monster

My first wife and I did meth with her brother in law. He was the meth monster. Meth tore our relationship to hell. Speed freaks have a hard time communicating and we both turned into monsters. Meth sent me to prison for robbery. 10 out of the last 14 years of my life has been spent paying the consequences for my meth habit. We used the needle, and I'll be affected for the rest of my life.

I've been clean since 1/19/90, but it wasn't easy. I really think it was more mental than physical, even though I battled physically too, and still am after all these years. I take life one day at a time.

Meth caused us to rob, steal, lie, lose jobs, lose friends, and eventually we lost each other. My brother in law was in and out of prison, and in 1991 he made a man deep throat a shotgun and pulled both barrels. He was sent to TDCJ-ID for 25 years, and after serving 10 flat he died of cancer in his spine. All of his hair and teeth were gone, he looked like an old man at 48.

I am a firm believer that the 12 step programs saved my life. Step one taught me to realize I was lost and outta control, step two took awhile. First I came, then I came to, then I came to believe that a power greater than myself could restore my sanity. Step 3 is spiritual, and for those who don't believe in God, you can still get to know g.o.d. Good orderly direction. Spend time in the group, trust the group conscience! Talk or share. Allow time for the demon to go away. Life isn't fair, and I've never read anywhere that it is supposed to be, but there is life after meth.
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  #45  
Old 10-25-2004, 03:52 PM
BigDawgsBabyGrl BigDawgsBabyGrl is offline
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Smile Re: Meth Use(Abuse)

[quote=babylove]I am a recovering meth user. I have been clean from meth for almost 3 months.
Babylove,
I was addicted to meth, for years! It completely destroyed my family and (nearly), destroyed my life! :shake: I was a real mess! I wanted to commit suicide and I wanted to hurt anyone that tried to help me. It is a horrible drug! (and although) it "NEARLY" destroyed me... operative word here is... "Nearly"... it didn't!!! I survived this horrible nightmare! It took me over 3 years to recover (completely). And although the withdrawl symptoms are bad! I believe that you can get through this ordeal. I had used other drugs (as well), mainly Cocaine, but when I tried meth, I fell in Love (Horrible, but true statement). I tried to go "Cold Turkey" and felt like I was going to die! But little by little, I started wanting it less & less. As I recovered I became very desprssed so, Doctors prescribed 7 Anti-Depressants & 3 Anti-Psychotic medications, the medicines worked for a little while, but not for long! The only way that I (personally) found relief, was by turning to God. I had nowhere else left to turn and no one seemed to understand what I was going through. Only then, was I able to find "real relief". When you feel at your lowest (know in your heart), that this is part of the "process" of getting clean and know that you will survive. Keep yourself busy and be around people, as much as possible (yeah! that is easier said than done, huh!) Believe me, I know! But it is the best thing that you can do for yourself! (Now, this is going to sound kinda dumb!) but (if your not doing so already) try keeping a diet that includes lots and lots of fruits and veggies and taking a good multi-vitamin. This also helped my overall system get back "on track". Sugar was something that I craved (in massive quantities), when I was recovering (but try) to keep away from any form of sugar. If you have a good friend that you can confide in, call them if (and or) when you are feeling "weak". Its hard but not impossible to survive this, addiction. I will be praying for you and I know that you can make it through this! Don't Give Up! Take Care!
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  #46  
Old 10-25-2004, 10:28 PM
MookieCollins MookieCollins is offline
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Congrats on your recovery and welcome to PTO, I really relate to your experiences to meth (and sugar )
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  #47  
Old 10-26-2004, 09:26 PM
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I'm 3 1/2 years sober after riding that addiction train for roughly 6 years. Eddy's in for manufacturing, for 8 1/2 to 13 years. I've done a lot of different drugs - meth is the only one that ever grabbed on and I couldn't shake, no matter how bad I wanted to quit. It took getting so far gone on the crap that I was craving health and wellness and sanity for me and my family more than I was wanting the dope. Since he was a cook it was available 24/7 anytime I wanted, as much as I wanted. I got sick of it. I wanted to feel normal again, and I just quit. Well, I can't say I "just quit", what I did is leave with the kids and begged Eddy to stop what he was doing. He wasn't quite at that place yet though, and several months later he was busted. I never went to treatment or even NA....the one time I tried before, I relapsed hardcore after 3 months. Just wasn't ready. Now I've moved far away from the HUGE circle of friends/co-users/customers that we had, and I choose who I associate with very carefully.
The withdrawal period was one of severe depression/anxiety/cravings/fear. I still have many effects of having been addicted to such a powerful, insidious drug. My memory isn't what it was. My ability to communicate thoughts verbally isn't what it was. I am an administrative assistant for a living, and deal with professional people on the phone and in the office daily. Sometimes I'll form a rational thought in my head, open my mouth, and stumbling bumbling nonsense comes out. It's like something's been short-circuited in there. I work on this all the time and am slowly starting to improve, but I have to really concentrate when I speak.
My creativity is shot, as is my imagination. I cannot make plans without writing them down everywhere and having a couple of people remind me, my memory is terrible! I also have a touch of agoraphobia, which was WAY worse in my first year or two of sobriety...I couldn't fathom holding a job where I'd deal with "the suits" of the world. I still have a morbid fear of law enforcement which I'm slowly overcoming.
I'm terribly moody yet, but compared to where I was even a year ago I've made huge strides there as well. Recovery is happening but it's certainly slow.....
Oh and one more thing. Meth users get skinny. Well I was thin to start with, so you can imagine - anyway, since I've been sober I've put on 50+ lbs that absolutely will NOT come off no matter what I do. I exercise, I diet. Still it stays. A friend of mine told me that meth will completely screw up the metabolism. You are literally starving yourself on meth and your metabolism like all other body processes, is jacked way up. You get off the meth, and the metabolism plummets in its activity level and it's preserving all the calories you take in. It takes a LONG time for the metabolism to realize that it needn't be in "survival" mode, hanging onto all those calories, and it will even itself out. I sure hope so, I'm a size 14 to 16 when for years, I was a 5/6 without even TRYING (and less when I was spun all that time).
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  #48  
Old 10-27-2004, 06:24 AM
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Congrads on three months.. that is great.. hold on for the ride of your life ,, what you are experiencing is very normal when detoxing off the drugs.. i too could not put sentences together when i first got clean 12 years ago .. now clean/sober 11years.. i've had my relapses.. and i had to hit my own bottom ... my love was heroin.. and i enjoyed meth.. however it was not that popular with my crowd or area .. of hangin out.. ONE DAY AT A TIME.. baby..


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Old 10-27-2004, 09:51 PM
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I appreciate everyones stories and prayers and gratitude. It really helps me in the long journey I have ahead.
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  #50  
Old 11-10-2004, 05:21 AM
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A warning for all current meth users: My 30 yr old brother has a condition directly related to his previous meth use. His brain is deteroriating and there is no way to stop it. He has had a stroke. The doctors say that within a couple of years he will be a vegetable and he has 2 little kids. This stuff is poison, literally. When I was a teenager, meth was my recreational drug of choice. I am drug free, as an adult. Only take advil and benadryl. You can kick the habit!
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