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Met While Incarcerated Were you introduced by a friend or family member after he/she was incarcerated? Did you meet as Pen Pals? This Forum is for you!

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  #2451  
Old 03-15-2016, 03:51 AM
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Welcome to the "Met While Incarcerated" forum. Please tell us as much or as little as you like about yourself so we can all get to know and support one another better. Please use this thread for introductions ONLY.

Patty
Hi everyone! I'm a french woman and was looking for a non judgmental friendship since I had a lot on my plate and I also wanted to improve my english and learn about the American culture.I came across that pen-pal website and replied to an ad that appealled to me in july 2014. It turns out that that was the best idea ever.We became great friends and I went and visited him last summer..We are in love now and I'm really looking forward next year when he'll come out.I also had tons of negative comments about it, people telling me that he's taking advantage from me.I don't see it that way, he's been very loving and supportive though he's the one who is incarcerated..so, though this long distance relationship sucks, I'm very grateful that I found him.
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Old 03-15-2016, 04:38 AM
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Hi everyone! I'm a french woman and was looking for a non judgmental friendship since I had a lot on my plate and I also wanted to improve my english and learn about the American culture.I came across that pen-pal website and replied to an ad that appealled to me in july 2014. It turns out that that was the best idea ever.We became great friends and I went and visited him last summer..We are in love now and I'm really looking forward next year when he'll come out.I also had tons of negative comments about it, people telling me that he's taking advantage from me.I don't see it that way, he's been very loving and supportive though he's the one who is incarcerated..so, though this long distance relationship sucks, I'm very grateful that I found him.
It sounds like you found a good man!

I know that I feel I have found a good man as well, we have been together for over 4 1/2 years and still going strong! It's been a long time since I have loved someone this way. And he loves me as well, and was immensely worried when he found out that I had some recent health issues.

If he left me tomorrow, I would still be thankful that I have had the opportunity to have met and known him!
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Old 03-15-2016, 04:48 AM
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It sounds like you found a good man!

I know that I feel I have found a good man as well, we have been together for over 4 1/2 years and still going strong! It's been a long time since I have loved someone this way. And he loves me as well, and was immensely worried when he found out that I had some recent health issues.

If he left me tomorrow, I would still be thankful that I have had the opportunity to have met and known him!
Thank you so much Sammy's girl for your kind words! Yes, I believe that I found a gem and I intend to keep him as long as possible, though We have many obstacles to overcome Such as immigration to be together at last! Love conquers all!! Just have to be patient I guess!! I'm glad that your man supports you in difficult times too.i wish you a prompt recovery !!!
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  #2454  
Old 03-15-2016, 04:57 AM
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Oh but I just réaliséd that you were in France as well! So tell me, How many times did you actually met your man? I saw him just once and planning to go back this year...but We rarely speak on the phone Cos thats too expensive for him so its just snailmail and I miss him tremendously...Tell me, How do you do? 41/2 years is a very long relationship ! How do you plan your future? Bisous
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Old 03-29-2016, 03:57 PM
Mrsmeredithd979 Mrsmeredithd979 is offline
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Hello all,

Don't know if anyone still reads these. I'm a former correctional officer. I was on my probationary period when I was fired because I allegedly failed to maintain a professional relationship with an inmate. However they got the wrong inmate. The inmate they pinned on me was transferred to a different facility. I was told I was under investigation but it has been almost 3 months since the incident and I have not heard anything else from DoC. The inmate that I actually did have a relationship with was not even looked at, no one from the department suspected anything, he was never a suspect in their eyes. Other inmates had their suspicions but no one was ever able to know if it was true or not. Other than the letters he wrote me while I was working there, there is absolutely no physical evidence of a relationship between us. Now I'm desperate to contact my man. I have found his moms Facebook page but I'm nervous to contact her, because I don't know if he ever told her about us. We were together for 5 months but I don't know if he ever told her. He's got a little more than a year left but I still want to write him some letters. My thing is I don't want to get him into any trouble. He's been a good inmate meaning he's never actually gotten written up or locked up at least at this facility. And of course I don't want to face any trouble either. I don't know what to do. I need to hear from my baby. Any help or advice is greatly appreciated.
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Old 03-29-2016, 04:22 PM
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Hello all,
Don't know if anyone still reads these. I'm a former correctional officer. I was on my probationary period when I was fired because I allegedly failed to maintain a professional relationship with an inmate. [...] I don't know what to do. I need to hear from my baby. Any help or advice is greatly appreciated.

We have many former staff who have dealt with investigation and moving forward with their relationship above the table. I encourage you to post an intro in the general Welcome forum as well so they may "meet" you, too.
Welcome to PTO.
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  #2457  
Old 03-30-2016, 11:41 PM
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for the sake of You & Him, You talking on here was to much.
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Hello all,

Don't know if anyone still reads these. I'm a former correctional officer. I was on my probationary period when I was fired because I allegedly failed to maintain a professional relationship with an inmate. However they got the wrong inmate. The inmate they pinned on me was transferred to a different facility. I was told I was under investigation but it has been almost 3 months since the incident and I have not heard anything else from DoC. The inmate that I actually did have a relationship with was not even looked at, no one from the department suspected anything, he was never a suspect in their eyes. Other inmates had their suspicions but no one was ever able to know if it was true or not. Other than the letters he wrote me while I was working there, there is absolutely no physical evidence of a relationship between us. Now I'm desperate to contact my man. I have found his moms Facebook page but I'm nervous to contact her, because I don't know if he ever told her about us. We were together for 5 months but I don't know if he ever told her. He's got a little more than a year left but I still want to write him some letters. My thing is I don't want to get him into any trouble. He's been a good inmate meaning he's never actually gotten written up or locked up at least at this facility. And of course I don't want to face any trouble either. I don't know what to do. I need to hear from my baby. Any help or advice is greatly appreciated.
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Old 03-31-2016, 04:11 PM
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I met him when visiting a family member. It was polite, quick and intense and I questioned my feelings because I felt the connection between us. I went on a mission to become his pen pal but he was a step ahead of me and wrote first. I began visiting 6 months later, got engaged a year afterwards and here we are still in love 10 years later. We have put in two marriage packets but as soon as we get a date, he's moved.... hmmmmm : ( life has been rough at times but we make the best of things. I don't give him money or send packages but his family does and I live far away so I'm not able to visit more than 4 times a year. He is a good man and I have hope he will be my life partner but just as with any man.... free or not.... there's work to be done and only time will tell because nothing is a guarantee. He will be home by 2020
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Old 03-31-2016, 10:02 PM
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I met him when visiting a family member. It was polite, quick and intense and I questioned my feelings because I felt the connection between us. I went on a mission to become his pen pal but he was a step ahead of me and wrote first. I began visiting 6 months later, got engaged a year afterwards and here we are still in love 10 years later. [...]
Hi Tr1quetra! I've moved your post to MWI intros.
I love hearing MWI stories with some years under the belt. Congrats on ten years!

Welcome to PTO.
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  #2460  
Old 04-05-2016, 06:58 PM
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I met my fiancé while working where is was serving. We did not have a relationship while I was there. I left. We have been together almost 2 years now, but they do not let us visit because I am a former employee. I'm sure there is a thread somewhere here more suited for me, but I find Prison Talk VERY difficult to navigate! Can anyone tell me if we will EVER be allowed to visit, or what the chances are of that... OR, would it be granted if we got married? I just got our marriage license in case that would help. We are in Georgia, BTW...

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Old 04-13-2016, 09:58 PM
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Hi my name is Karl. I met Amanda through write a prisoner. Well the last 15 months has been quite a ride. She is really so beautiful and everything in a woman that I have ever dreamt about. We are engaged. I've never felt the emotions this woman makes me feel. We talk everyday usually at least a phone call a day sometimes 3or 4 times a day. We do jpay too. She's about to start a 90 day SEG sentence. That sucks. I'm so used to hearing her voice and good mornings good nights. I hate to think about how I'm gonna miss her but we will make it. Back to hand writing letters everyday. I'm pretty shy and quiet. I don't talk about her to everybody but my family all knows her now. and I have older teenage kids that are all excited for me and her. My mom already loves her too. I've had the pleasure of getting to know her mom and dad. It was scary getting to know them but they are really supportive of me and her Her mom is a sweet heart we talk a lot. and she has a couple kids that I've enjoyed getting to know too. They are sweethearts too. It took some time for me to really trust in her. And at times she had some suspicions about me. But I love her so much I can't think about another woman. She trusts me too. I honestly never put too much belief in people having a soul mate. But I honestly believe now that I have really found my soul mate. It was really an odd thing for me to write her that first letter I had never wrote a single letter in my life before that day. I remember I had to look at some of my mail to make sure what corner I put her address and where to put mine. LOL It just ain't me to do something like this but I did. Gosh am I ever glad I stepped out of my box that night. She's at KCIW in Kentucky. Her max out day is 2020 but may parole out sooner. But I'm enjoying every minute I spend with her now and she makes me happy every minute of every day I can wait another 15 months 15 more times if that's what it takes. I'm glad I finally found this site. It's nice to read about others in my shoes. I look forward to reading more

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  #2462  
Old 04-14-2016, 04:23 PM
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I've been looking for others that would understand what's going on in my life and I guess this is it. I received a letter from an inmate at the local jail. He was writing to tell me that he enjoyed my Friday night radio show and after some research on his history I wrote back. After about a month of writing I finally went to visit him between the glass and a few weeks later we had our first contact visit. Sadly, I had to move to another city in Alaska a week ago and it's very expensive to travel here, especially between the islands of Southeast. I've been struggling with getting the phone to work so now all we have are our letters. It does worry me that our feelings have escalated very quickly, but I guess six months isn't out of the question... He's awaiting sentencing in May/June as he can't afford the 25K cash bail. The uncertainty of how long he will get is driving me crazy! Okay, well that's most of my MWI story. Until next time!
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  #2463  
Old 04-15-2016, 04:00 PM
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Hi everyone! I'm a french woman and was looking for a non judgmental friendship since I had a lot on my plate and I also wanted to improve my english and learn about the American culture.I came across that pen-pal website and replied to an ad that appealled to me in july 2014. It turns out that that was the best idea ever.We became great friends and I went and visited him last summer..We are in love now and I'm really looking forward next year when he'll come out.I also had tons of negative comments about it, people telling me that he's taking advantage from me.I don't see it that way, he's been very loving and supportive though he's the one who is incarcerated..so, though this long distance relationship sucks, I'm very grateful that I found him.
It is strange how it all comes out, but it is so great when it does.. follow your feelings.
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Old 04-15-2016, 04:18 PM
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Well i hope im not the only one with the crazy and complicated story i met him back in 93 94 he was a good friend of my friend, he introduced us, i went along. we wrote and spoke on the phone all the time and i would also visit him even when i had my boyfriend (whom later i married) and after 20+ years we found each other again, its a long story and i dont want to get a nasty message that i talked to much lol
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Old 04-16-2016, 03:50 AM
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I met my friend while I was a case manager at a Halfway house. We continued our friendship after I quit working there. I lost touch with him for a few years then someone told me he was in jail so I wrote him. He is now in prison and has about 7 more years to do. I didn't want to have feelings for him and I tried hard not to, but I do. I am still trying to fight it, though I think I am losing the battle LOL.
But no matter how it turns out, I will always be there for him. He would always brighten my day when I was working at the Halfway house, and I want to do the same for him.
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Old 04-16-2016, 10:01 AM
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I met my friend while I was a case manager at a Halfway house. We continued our friendship after I quit working there. I lost touch with him for a few years then someone told me he was in jail so I wrote him. He is now in prison and has about 7 more years to do. I didn't want to have feelings for him and I tried hard not to, but I do. I am still trying to fight it, though I think I am losing the battle LOL.
But no matter how it turns out, I will always be there for him. He would always brighten my day when I was working at the Halfway house, and I want to do the same for him.

I am quite sure it will not only turn out well, but will be a heartfelt adventure while you get there.

I am sort of noticing a trend with many of the people here who share their stories. We seem to start off with an empathy for someone who is restricted in their lives and we have it in us to care and the desire to make someone's life better.. a desire to be a ray of sunshine in a grey world. Just sayin'
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Old 04-16-2016, 10:05 AM
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Well i hope im not the only one with the crazy and complicated story i met him back in 93 94 he was a good friend of my friend, he introduced us, i went along. we wrote and spoke on the phone all the time and i would also visit him even when i had my boyfriend (whom later i married) and after 20+ years we found each other again, its a long story and i dont want to get a nasty message that i talked to much lol


you won't get any negative feedback here for sharing your story and feelings. We all share parts of other's stories and we are here to share and to listen to the stories of others, regardless of how long or complex. You won't find a better or more understanding audience than here. We do care and only wish to assist each other and offer a shoulder to each other while we wait for our loved ones to come home.
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  #2468  
Old 04-23-2016, 10:13 PM
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Hi, I'm Joy. I met her through a tv show that I saw and reached out to say hello back in 2013, letters came and we struck up a great friendship. I developed feelings and went and met her in prison. Scared her by telling her how i felt, but we worked through it. She got scared again and tried to cut communication off, but came back and told me how much she missed me and had been thinking of me. Phone calls three times a day lead to her starting to fall for me and we began "planning" for when she gets out and everything. Then phone calls stopped for a few months, but still received letters apologizing for not calling, but that she was thinking of me everyday. Came back again last year in April, then stopped again in May. August got a "goodbye" letter. Now I'm lost, I don't understand, Im trying to deal with it, but I miss her so much and I just want her back in my life. Does this sound pathetic? She still has 20+ years and yet I'd wait for every single day just to be there for her when she does get released because I love her and genuinely care about her. If she can only handle friendship I am perfectly willing to give that to her, but to just cut me off like that with that cold one page letter after everything we had been through, the connection that we have. I don't accept that. People have told me to write to her, but I am scared and I don't think she wants to hear from me.

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Old 04-23-2016, 11:08 PM
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Hi, I'm Joy. I met her through a tv show that I saw and reached out to say hello back in 2013, letters came and we struck up a great friendship. I developed feelings and went and met her in prison....Then phone calls stopped for a few months, but still received letters apologizing for not calling, but that she was thinking of me everyday. Came back again last year in April, then stopped again in May. August got a "goodbye" letter. Now I'm lost, I don't understand, Im trying to deal with it, but I miss her so much and I just want her back in my life. Does this sound pathetic? ....
It's not pathetic to love someone. You were brave when you visited and told her the feelings you had for her. And...you were honest. your incarcerated friend is having some mixed thoughts and emotions obviously. Others have told you to continue to write to her and that might be a good thing to do. Be friendly but not the begging "please come back" kind of letter that you know could scare her. So write to her...and if you're allowed to do it, enclose a SASE so she can reply more easily to you. Keep the letter friendly and let her know what you've been doing since August. There are so many reasons she could have for cutting off communications and thinking about them all will drive you friggin' batty. BTDT. Ahem. Imagination is a great thing but it often gets out of hand. So write a friendly letter and don't have any great expectations. Hopefully she'll see that you're being her friend and will respond. You can't get a response if you don't send a letter first. I am with those that said to write...but I will also say keep it on a friend level and give her news about what you've done lately and leave it at that. Best of luck Joy.

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Old 05-05-2016, 07:01 PM
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Cool I am new and../....

My name is Iris.. I met him online while viewing photos of inmates on one of the inmate social websites.

We have been talking over the phone and via mail for almost a year but....i am planning on visiting him on sat. May 7.

I really want to meet him but I am a bit nervous. He is already speaking of marriage and to be honest with you... I want to marry him too because I am a 60 year old lady and don't want to be alone anymore.. I have been divorced over 6 years... I know he has baggage, but who doesn't..

He says really nice things to me... do all inmates say the nicest things and make you feel loved?? I wonder.. Help!!
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Old 05-10-2016, 06:55 PM
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Hi there!
I was going through a real rough time, and just needed somebody to talk to! I honestly don't know what drew me in, to one of those prison pen pal sites, but it just happened one night. I guess I just kind of poked around to see what it was like, thinking a pen pal would be fun. I clicked his ad and read it a few times and thought to myself "oh gosh, he's just so cute!!! he'd never write me back, I bet he gets a million letters a day!!" a co-worker told me to go for it, because what's the worst that could happen? he could just not write back! lol so I went for it!!!!! we hit it off. it went like a wild fire. i kept telling myself "he's just a friend. he's just a friend. he's just a friend..." then a week long lock down went on. I couldn't sleep, I was so stressed out, anxiety set in. "when's he gonna call me?!?!" I started thinking I did something wrong, and I just wanted him to call me! Finally the call came through, I realized my feelings, and he did too.. a couple months after that, we exchanged "I love you's" and still 2-3 phone calls a night (a bit expensive, but hey, its totally worth it) and he's coming home in August! ^_^
We have yet to actually meet, because I'm so far away, but we've both discussed it, and what we would do if things happen to not work out. Everything is lined up, and ready. And now I just have to wait, in the final stretch!!
Wish I would have found this forum a lot sooner!! But still glad to be a part of it! Better late than never!
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Old 05-10-2016, 07:25 PM
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Hi there!
I was going through a real rough time, and just needed somebody to talk to! .......We have yet to actually meet, because I'm so far away, but we've both discussed it, and what we would do if things happen to not work out. Everything is lined up, and ready. And now I just have to wait, in the final stretch!!
Wish I would have found this forum a lot sooner!! But still glad to be a part of it! Better late than never!
Congrats. You sound like you have it all figured out and you are very much organized. I wish you luck. Meeting for the first time is going to be a bit different for you but it sounds like you're both excited to meet. Enjoy and whenever you feel like typing...we're here.
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CemeteryGates (05-17-2016)
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Old 05-15-2016, 09:26 PM
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Hello everyone...my inmate and I started as penpals...which led to phone calls...that was October 2013....we still are going strong...we decided to be committed to one another about a year ago...recently he told me he loves me...and I didn't hesitate to say it back....he will be released within in 2 years....my concern is what will he be like once he comes home....any thoughts...suggestions or insight....thanks in advance
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fbopnomore (05-16-2016)
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Old 05-16-2016, 06:56 AM
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Default Meeting Chris

Hi I met my fiance, my man through penpal. I was watching lockup raw and was going through a divorce, I was miserable. I wanted to talk to someone that was as miserable as me, that needed to talk and without judgement. It was Dec 23, 2013 12:30 am I was strolling through friends beyond walls. All the pictures looked scary ugh... I saw his pic he looked familiar. I opened his letter and he wrote what I was looking for. Im miserable, I want to be happy, I dont want to look back, I dont like liars and I know who is my Creator. I wrote and he wrote back. Jan 22,2013 he called me. I heard his voice and it was as if I knew him all my life. Im in MD he was in Ky. I went on a visit,May 2013. I wanted to see the voice, the letters that captured my heart. We clicked right away. Ive met his mother, his granny who he adores. It has been a Blessing. He will be home in 2-3 years. Hopefully with the 85% He will be free. He is a gentleman, His charge is a gun charge. He better stay away from guns. I love him <3 TE ADORO CHRISTOPHER
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fbopnomore (05-16-2016)
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Old 05-20-2016, 02:38 PM
MissMoto MissMoto is offline
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Default My Story?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Patty View Post
Welcome to the "Met While Incarcerated" forum. Please tell us as much or as little as you like about yourself so we can all get to know and support one another better. Please use this thread for introductions ONLY.

Patty
I met my sweetie over a pen pal site.. we started emailing, and his first email to me he told me he knew I was in love with him and we should just get married. (How Sweet, right?)

He's LWOP so it will be interesting to see how everything unfolds... but I am here to be his #1 support person.

His calls and emails get me through my days, that is for sure!
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