Dealing with a love one who passed away in prison

ladyev123 · #1 08-27-2017, 12:46 PM

On Aug 22nd my cousin passed away at NYSDOC Franklin CF. I'm not sure what hurts more knowing that my cousin passed away or that he passed away alone away from his family. We have no real answers as to what happen to him other then heart problems. 34 years old never had problems with his heart before. I came to this forum to see how other people were dealing with losing a loved one incarcerated.

xolady · #2 08-27-2017, 01:03 PM

I'm so sorry for your loss. I don't have much to say that will help I have gotten by by trying to find out why and how this happens. Very few answers and no help from DOC. I hate how there are so many unexplained deaths of young people in the Doc's care. I just pray no one goes thru what I have.

Curt'swife8 · #3 08-27-2017, 02:38 PM

I am so sorry for your loss!!!!

I do think that young "healthy" people can get overlooked. This happens on the street too! Medical personnel use history to make judgments and when there is no history, they don't know what to do. Did your cousin attempt medical care and get denied? Did your cousin have a drug addiction (I only ask because drugs take a toll on the heart and other internal organs unbeknownst to the addict).?

I pray that all of his friends and family find peace! I am sorry I don't have any knowledge or experience to support you with this problem.

**patchouli** · #4 08-27-2017, 03:28 PM

My heartfelt condolences on the loss of your cousin

sprits · #5 08-27-2017, 04:33 PM

I'm very sorry for your loss.

choclgs · #6 08-27-2017, 05:30 PM

My heart is with you and your loved ones for peace and comfort.

His_Queen13 · #7 08-27-2017, 05:49 PM

I am so sorry for your loss. I hope someone has some answers for you. Grieving of any type is difficult. I can't fathom losing anyone I love in prison.

**miamac** · #8 08-27-2017, 06:13 PM

I am so very sorry for the loss of your loved one. I can't imagine what your head and heart must be suffering right now.

Did they release a death certificate to the family or how was the information about his heart condition passed?

**GingerM** · #9 08-28-2017, 06:08 AM

My sympathies as well. I suggest getting a copy of the coroner's report once it's finalized, if you think the whole family would be helped by knowing exactly what the coroner said about his condition. It is a public record, though it may take some digging to get it.

It's very difficult to deal with a death in prison precisely because of what you said, we didn't know about it, it snuck up behind us, and information is difficult to obtain.

I know coroners will list "heart attack" or "heart stoppage" as cause of death for a variety of things, from stabbings (the heart stopping is what killed the person) to severe asthma attacks (not enough oxygen, the heart stops) to cancer (where the heart stops as a result of almost any part of the cancer or treatment for the cancer). The law in most states does not allow a non-medical reason to be listed as cause of death, so "run over by train" is not a cause of death, but "heart stopped beating" is (which hearts will do when crushed by a train). So a lot of people have "heart (something)" listed as their cause of death, even when that's not what truly killed them.

Meanwhile, the family reels from the blow and can't think straight.

My condolences to everyone who is dealing with the fallout from this. Much sympathy from me.