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  #51  
Old 08-25-2020, 08:18 AM
Diamond4u Diamond4u is offline
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Originally Posted by MizzyMuffling View Post
Please allow me to be blunt: you are going crazy here.. he's free because you dumped him and even though you want him back, he's not giving you that vibe but rather he's keeping you "entertained" in case he wants you back at some point. He's doing all the "normal" stuff a single guy is allowed to do... getting to know new people, enjoying his freedom and moving on.
You are seriously obsessed and you have to let it go already.
U donít have to be condescendent. It is the second time and the one of two many already u act that way here! Everyone is being respectful here, if it is beyond your abilities feel free to go.
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  #52  
Old 08-25-2020, 08:21 AM
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Originally Posted by MizzyMuffling View Post
Please allow me to be blunt: you are going crazy here.. he's free because you dumped him and even though you want him back, he's not giving you that vibe but rather he's keeping you "entertained" in case he wants you back at some point. He's doing all the "normal" stuff a single guy is allowed to do... getting to know new people, enjoying his freedom and moving on.
You are seriously obsessed and you have to let it go already.
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Iím super happy you heard from him!
I know it can be worrisome when youíve known someone cut off from everyday life and then suddenly theyíre out in the world - but itís a good thing. You want to be with him on the outside, and that includes getting to know him as he engages with the outside world. Choosing you means more when he chooses you over all the other options in the world - and if he doesnít, well honey, you dodged a bullet. Do you want to be with a hostage or with someone free who continues to choose you?

Itíll all work out the way it should.
Thank u so much for your perspective and your wise words! You are absolutely right. I need to see it as the glass is half full rather than half empty.
He is telling me that since he is free we can have the future we talked about so bad.
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  #53  
Old 08-25-2020, 08:32 AM
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U donít have to be condescendent. Everyone is being respectful here. If it is beyond ur abilities feel free to go.

Hon, you posted your story on the Internet. With that, you can expect all different types of people and comments. Some will be what you want to hear. Some will not. Some will be what you need to hear, but choose not to accept. With that being said, this is like a huge buffet. Take what you like and leave the rest. You cannot tell people what and what not to post on a thread. Once you put it out there, it's out there and you can expect all kinds of responses. You can always choose to ignore the ones you don't care for.

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  #54  
Old 08-25-2020, 09:20 AM
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I think at this point maybe a letter might be best. That way you can totally explain what was going on, and is going on now.
But agree with the others..he's now called you. Its time to let him take lead.
He will still have many things he must do in order to follow *rules* in the halfway house. Probably finding a job among the most important. Possibly attending some sort of classes or programs, so his time may be even more limited now than it was while he was in prison.
Still, its time for him to take the lead.
Keep yourself busy, doing what ever things you enjoy.......work, crafts, gardening, cooking.... whatever that may be.
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  #55  
Old 08-26-2020, 08:56 AM
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Loyalty is everything for men in prison. When you choose to be with someone in prison you kinda know what you are getting yourself into. Communication might be challenging at times. Itís not going to be a walk in the park. If I were him I wouldnít deal with you. You were not consistent. Now that heís out he needs to focus on getting his life together and he doesnít need anything stressing him or distracting him. If you love him let him be and if he comes looking for you then be with him if thatís what you want. Iím not trying to be mean Iím just being honest.
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  #56  
Old 08-27-2020, 06:46 AM
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Everyday that passes by with no news from me is killing me! He has my phone number, I have a US phone number as well. I already sent him a love letter when he was in jail, I feel like If I do that again it may not impact him. I want to show him though my actions that I care. But the range of actions is very limited. He said he would call me but it doesnít seem normal I still didnít hear from him.
Youíve already written him and said he has your phone number. If he wants to talk to you then he will call. However, donít expect him wanting to run back to you. Prepare yourself is he chooses not to be with you. In the meantime, live your life. Focus on yourself.
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  #57  
Old 08-27-2020, 08:08 PM
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Even though I don't always see eye-to-eye with Mizzy, her bluntness and insight are gold.

Someone else already said what I'm about to: if a guy is interested, he will find you, even if you're stranded on Mars. It's how they're wired. They like and need a challenge. Chasing a guy is emasculating. Don't do it. Give the man some room to consider his options. If he doesn't choose you, it wasn't meant to be.

Last edited by Taliba00; 08-27-2020 at 08:23 PM..
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  #58  
Old 08-28-2020, 08:21 AM
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I just have to say one thing. Every man is different. My man legit loves my freaky stalker side, and I can honestly say I've never dated a more dominate (in a good way) man, so I am nicely disagreeing with the chasing is a bad thing opinion. To each their own. And if she's a chaser, like me apparently lol, she'll find her soul mate by being herself.
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  #59  
Old 08-28-2020, 09:32 AM
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I am kinda worried cause now he is on social media I told him so but we will see...
Social media ruins relationships especially Facebook and messenger it gives them temptations to do things i hate social media and Facebook wish they never invented it it ruins marriages its a known fact good luck with your relationship
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  #60  
Old 08-28-2020, 09:36 AM
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Iím scared he adds many girls or girls add him. I am not a jealous type of person normally but considering those circumstances where he has not a lot of proofs that he can trust me Iím worried. He says he wants to be with me tho
Well you no that's gonna happen then they start messaging and talking and one thing leads to another been there done that if it's not cheating physically it's emotionally cheating
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  #61  
Old 08-28-2020, 09:42 AM
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[quote=Taliba00;7825823]Even though I don't always see eye-to-eye with Mizzy, her bluntness and insight are gold.

Someone else already said what I'm about to: if a guy is interested, he will find you, even if you're stranded on Mars. It's how they're wired. They like and need a challenge. Chasing a guy is emasculating. Don't do it. Give the man some room to consider his options. If he doesn't choose you, it wasn't meant to be.[/QUOT

Yeah but sometimes when people say certain things it affects some people differently maybe people should say things a little differently and not so blunt and hostile
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  #62  
Old 08-28-2020, 09:44 AM
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I just have to say one thing. Every man is different. My man legit loves my freaky stalker side, and I can honestly say I've never dated a more dominate (in a good way) man, so I am nicely disagreeing with the chasing is a bad thing opinion. To each their own. And if she's a chaser, like me apparently lol, she'll find her soul mate by being herself.
Yeah i couldn't agree with you more im the same way you gotta go for what you want how ever that may be lol
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  #63  
Old 08-28-2020, 11:15 AM
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The sun shines different when you are looking out the window vs being outside.

It sounds like he is moving on with his life.

Give him the space he needs and take this one on the chin..
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  #64  
Old 08-28-2020, 11:25 AM
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I just have to say one thing. Every man is different. My man legit loves my freaky stalker side, and I can honestly say I've never dated a more dominate (in a good way) man, so I am nicely disagreeing with the chasing is a bad thing opinion. To each their own. And if she's a chaser, like me apparently lol, she'll find her soul mate by being herself.

He likes it because he likes you.

If you arenít interested in someone at the same level, itís not cute. Same for men. I might like to be pursued by someone Iím also into and think itís romantic, but if Iím not feeling it, itís creepy.
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  #65  
Old 08-28-2020, 11:46 AM
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You can chase a person all day long but it doesn't necessarily make them want to be with you. That is a decision only they can make and you can't force it. What will be will be. Tell someone you would like to be with them , make yourself available and contactable and leave the ball in their court.
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  #66  
Old 08-28-2020, 12:24 PM
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Originally Posted by WeepingWillow View Post
He likes it because he likes you.

If you arenít interested in someone at the same level, itís not cute. Same for men. I might like to be pursued by someone Iím also into and think itís romantic, but if Iím not feeling it, itís creepy.
This is true. There does come a point you need to quit, but I wouldn't be there yet if I were in her shoes.
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  #67  
Old 08-29-2020, 02:27 PM
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The sun shines different when you are looking out the window vs being outside.

It sounds like he is moving on with his life.

Give him the space he needs and take this one on the chin..
He phoned me guys, we are back together
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  #68  
Old 08-29-2020, 03:07 PM
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He phoned me guys, we are back together
Awww that's great to hear glad things worked out for you
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  #69  
Old 09-04-2020, 06:50 PM
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[quote=Diamond4u;7825489]Hi everyone,



He says he’s gonna call me when he is out. Well he is at a halfway house since last Tuesday
and


I still didn’t get any news from him! I’m feeling devastated.

__________________________________________________ ________

hola.chica.
responding to 1st post:

-Move on,til he reach you.Then, if he finally reach you, tell him how it made you feel, and you two work it out.IF it's meant to be, you're going to be just fine w/him.
-If it is REAL trust me chica,he will be showing it with ACTION not just word. I am hoping he reach out to you soon.Don't wait, meanwhile keep busy.

-If he is already showing you he can't even keep his word on reaching you and if he does later, just take it slow, and be careful.

Good luck to you. LIFE TOO SHORT 2 SETTLE.Hugs -n- Blessings! Good luck. Time to watch new epie of LOVE AFTER LOCK UP tonight. PM private msg me anytime.Adios.
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  #70  
Old 09-06-2020, 07:57 PM
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Men work for what they want; it is the way they are wired. If he truly wants to be with you, he will find the way. If you force things, then you will never really know. Live your life and he will find you if it is meant to be.
If I were the dude in this situation and I heard she left for another guy, I'd never consider for a second going back. If I wasn't good enough then, I'll never be able to be convinced I am good enough now.
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  #71  
Old 09-06-2020, 08:08 PM
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Social media ruins relationships especially Facebook and messenger it gives them temptations to do things i hate social media and Facebook wish they never invented it it ruins marriages its a known fact good luck with your relationship
... What? I got this all wrong then. Your man bashing is nauseating.
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  #72  
Old 09-07-2020, 01:46 AM
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... What? I got this all wrong then. Your man bashing is nauseating.
No body is male bashing how is that i was responding from what someone said it's a known fact that Facebook ruins relationships that's not male bashing
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  #73  
Old 09-07-2020, 07:37 AM
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No body is male bashing how is that i was responding from what someone said it's a known fact that Facebook ruins relationships that's not male bashing
Facebook does not ruin relationships its an internet based program/tool. People ruin relationships no one has to be on social media and no one has to use facebook to reach out to others for relationships behind their partners back.

If someone wants to cheat they will find a way whether they have facebook or not.
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  #74  
Old 09-07-2020, 08:19 AM
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Facebook does not ruin relationships its an internet based program/tool. People ruin relationships no one has to be on social media and no one has to use facebook to reach out to others for relationships behind their partners back.

If someone wants to cheat they will find a way whether they have facebook or not.
I see what your saying but Facebook makes it easier for partners to cheat on one another some people can't hold back temptations i googled it it said it's a known fact that it ruins relationships cause they start massaging than one thing leads to another
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Old 09-07-2020, 09:19 AM
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I see what your saying but Facebook makes it easier for partners to cheat on one another some people can't hold back temptations i googled it it said it's a known fact that it ruins relationships cause they start massaging than one thing leads to another
Flirting with someone who you work with can lead to one thing and another, so can flirting in a bar or in a shop. If someone wants to cheat they will always find away whether facebook exists or not. The fact is no one can enter through a closed door , it takes a person to be willing to open those doors. Someone who is really in love and devoted to a partner is unlikely to do that.
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