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The Nimuay Domestic Violence Support Forum News and information relating to domestic violence in general. Please post here if you don't see a sub-forums that fits better.

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  #1  
Old 03-07-2006, 05:00 AM
stevenpjd stevenpjd is offline
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Lightbulb Domestic Violence Restraining Orders-Sword or Shield

On May 24, 2005 I discovered my wife was having an adulterous affair with another parent in my son's cub scout troop. I learned this when I found the emails that were going between them. I went back to my wife's apartment (we had agreed to meet and talk about things) I decided not to wait. I was angry and I was hurt. I left her a message. I took a dozen sheets of paper and wrote the letter "A" in red crayon and taped the sheets about her apartment including the front door. I went home and emailed copies of those emails to the guys wife. I told my wife that I was going to go to court and ask for custody of my children. On June 14, 2005 (3 weeks later) I was arrested by a Parole Officer and charged with burglarizing my wife's apartment and theft (stealing emails from our car) and stealing a camera (that I owned) from her apartment. Parole Board violated me gave me 10 months with half. Then Riverside County filed new riminal charges for burglary and stalking. Meanwhile my lovely ex goes to court and gets a domestic violence restraining order. On January 9, 2006 the Riverside Superior Court in Case No. RIF 124959 dismissed all charges for lack of probable cause. You see the burglary never happened and sending emails to your wife asking her to agree to marriage counseling is not stalking. But if you go into Riverside County Family Law Court and simply ask for a restraining order, you can get it. Nevermind that there has never been any domestic violence. It also helps if your Church Group will prepare your court papers and someone knows someone on the Corona Police Department that can set you up to get custody of your kids so you can continue your adulterous affair without interference from your kid's father. If you are not a victim, just pretend to be.
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  #2  
Old 03-07-2006, 05:57 AM
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AmyLynn AmyLynn is offline
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That is sad if she just did it cause she was mad and not in fear. But if she was scared then she had her reason. I'm sorry that you were hurt! Time heals all wounds.
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Old 03-07-2006, 11:35 PM
stevenpjd stevenpjd is offline
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Amylynn: She did it so she could carry on with her boyfrioend and not worry about me seeking custody of my kids. I am no longer angry about it... I am planning to go into court later this month and expose it for what it is. Thanks for your comment
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Old 03-08-2006, 05:09 AM
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that is so messed up. I hope that you get everything fixed and you get your kids back!!!
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Old 05-04-2006, 07:00 PM
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Jordanrae Jordanrae is offline
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I have questions about this, myself........A friend of a friend (yeah - I know) gets mad at her husband and goes in, files a temporary restraining order against him - gets him served - police are notified, etc......THEN - because he doesn't call her (the restraining order prohibits this!!) - SHE calls and calls, begging, crying, threatening that he will never see the kids, etc. etc. If he DOES respond - and they get into an argument - she then calls the police to get him arrested!!!

My question is.......Are there any laws - or restrictions - pertaining to the PERSON who has obtained the restraining order - to also NOT MAKE CONTACT??? We need to stop this cycle....so can anyone help on this??
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Old 11-04-2006, 11:11 PM
stevenpjd stevenpjd is offline
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Default Holder of Restraining Order Calling Restrained Person

Even if the holder of the restraining order calls, the restrained person is in violation. The caller is not restrained.... If they want to have a relationship they need to both go to court and having restraining order dismissed... FUBAR isnt it ?
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Old 11-19-2006, 09:19 AM
meganlea meganlea is offline
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I hate to say it, but there doesn't necessarily have to be violence to get a DV protection order. It falls under the DV order because you're married. Had she been just a girlfriend and you weren't living together or had any children then it wouldn't be a domestic situation and you'd receive a stalking protection order. It's just a title, don't read into it.
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Old 11-29-2006, 12:59 AM
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and as far as her making contact with him in the eyes of the law that if fine the "protected one" can make first contact but the who who the order is against can not make first con tact and even if she makes first contact and feels things are going south she can still call the cops
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