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  #4351  
Old 08-27-2018, 09:32 PM
Yulia89 Yulia89 is offline
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Default I miss him - just having one of those days

Hi ladies,
not a whole lot to add to my thread today... itís just been a really tough week as we wait to find out whether or not my boyfriend makes bail this week. If he does, Iím flying out to london to be with him for a week before his sentencing (his trial is sep 27th). Just wanted to vent and share that Iím really fucking missing him today.
You guys are some of the strongest women Iíve ever met.

Xx
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  #4352  
Old 08-27-2018, 09:38 PM
upsetspouse upsetspouse is offline
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Hi ladies,
not a whole lot to add to my thread today... itís just been a really tough week as we wait to find out whether or not my boyfriend makes bail this week. If he does, Iím flying out to london to be with him for a week before his sentencing (his trial is sep 27th). Just wanted to vent and share that Iím really fucking missing him today.
You guys are some of the strongest women Iíve ever met.

Xx
Hope all goes well with at his bail hearing
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  #4353  
Old 08-27-2018, 11:13 PM
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Hope all goes well with at his bail hearing
Thank you, your support is much appreciated xx
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  #4354  
Old 08-31-2018, 12:08 AM
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I love when I come across threads like this when it's needed ...

I have been so overwhelmed with feelings and thoughts that I'm numb to everything lately.. I went from being an emotional wreck & feeling all sorts of ways, to feeling empty.

I had been thinking about a lot of things we been through , good & bad . We been in this situation before & I'm always hearing how he's gonna do better . This time I kept asking myself do i stay or go? Im in love him that's not uncertain, but I'm not quite sure he's in love with me. I question sometimes if he loves me or loves what I do for him..

I have all this extra time now to just think & think & think.. & they do say absence makes the heart grow fonder..

The fact that the days have gotten easier , scares me.. but it is what it is , 7 more months to go.
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  #4355  
Old 08-31-2018, 07:23 AM
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I love when I come across threads like this when it's needed ...

I have been so overwhelmed with feelings and thoughts that I'm numb to everything lately.. I went from being an emotional wreck & feeling all sorts of ways, to feeling empty.

I had been thinking about a lot of things we been through , good & bad . We been in this situation before & I'm always hearing how he's gonna do better . This time I kept asking myself do i stay or go? Im in love him that's not uncertain, but I'm not quite sure he's in love with me. I question sometimes if he loves me or loves what I do for him..

I have all this extra time now to just think & think & think.. & they do say absence makes the heart grow fonder..

The fact that the days have gotten easier , scares me.. but it is what it is , 7 more months to go.
Yes dear I know I felt the same way now what I have this big empty space in my heart all alone have been doing this for 3 years now with 2 more to go. I was so overwhelmed when he left I really don't remember the first year I won't say it's easy but you just deal with it the best way you can some days are good and some you just want to hide in bed. Just think of the good memories that you have with him and soon enough you will be back together again.

Stay strong hon.
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  #4356  
Old 09-02-2018, 08:46 PM
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It's just hard because for the last three weeks he was supposed to get out on a reinstated bail, but the judge hasn't signed off on it. I just want him back. It's been almost 2 months and at first I was fine with it, but now as time goes on I am starting to feel like I'm wasting my life away. Like I'm sitting on the sidelines of my own life. I love him so much it's just so hard. Does it ever get easier? Not only that is he still stays in contact with his ex. I mean they do have a child together, but when does their communication become too much?
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  #4357  
Old 09-02-2018, 09:10 PM
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It's just hard because for the last three weeks he was supposed to get out on a reinstated bail, but the judge hasn't signed off on it. I just want him back. It's been almost 2 months and at first I was fine with it, but now as time goes on I am starting to feel like I'm wasting my life away. Like I'm sitting on the sidelines of my own life. I love him so much it's just so hard. Does it ever get easier? Not only that is he still stays in contact with his ex. I mean they do have a child together, but when does their communication become too much?
Look at it this way: the longer he sits now, the more days of jail credit he'll have off his sentence. What sort of sentence is he looking at?

You sound very young, so let an old woman give ya some advice....don't sit home feeling like you're wasting you life because if you've put your life on hold, you really are wasting it and life's too short for that Besides, staying busy helps the time go by.

No, it doesn't get any easier. Especially before sentencing. That's one of the hardest parts of this journey. Once sentencing is over you'll know what kind of time you're dealing with, you'll get into a routine & you will get stronger. Right now take it one day at a time.

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  #4358  
Old 09-02-2018, 09:24 PM
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Look at it this way: the longer he sits now, the more days of jail credit he'll have off his sentence. What sort of sentence is he looking at?

You sound very young, so let an old woman give ya some advice....don't sit home feeling like you're wasting you life because if you've put your life on hold, you really are wasting it and life's too short for that Besides, staying busy helps the time go by.

No, it doesn't get any easier. Especially before sentencing. That's one of the hardest parts of this journey. Once sentencing is over you'll know what kind of time you're dealing with, you'll get into a routine & you will get stronger. Right now take it one day at a time.

Welcome to PTO
We're only looking at 3 years, but its still a lot because I am barely out of high school and trying to start my life on my own. When he was arrested it kind of blindsided me because everything was fine. Although he calls me daily (almost daily when he isn't on lockdown from fighting) It's still hard though. I got so use to seeing him daily and having him that now I don't. And I try to stay busy, but it seems the thought he won't be home when I get home still creeps into my mind.
And I really don't have anyone to go out with because a lot of my friends left me when I stayed with him when all this began.
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  #4359  
Old 09-03-2018, 06:23 PM
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We're only looking at 3 years, but its still a lot because I am barely out of high school and trying to start my life on my own. When he was arrested it kind of blindsided me because everything was fine. Although he calls me daily (almost daily when he isn't on lockdown from fighting) It's still hard though. I got so use to seeing him daily and having him that now I don't. And I try to stay busy, but it seems the thought he won't be home when I get home still creeps into my mind.
And I really don't have anyone to go out with because a lot of my friends left me when I stayed with him when all this began.
I know it's easier said than done , but continue to go about your day . Like you said you just got out of high school & are starting life on your own . Focus on that .

It honestly doesn't get any easier, I think you just get used to it . & I totally feel you about not having friends , I didn't have nobody to talk to when my man went in and keeping everything bottled up made it worse . . Message me if you need too
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  #4360  
Old 09-03-2018, 07:30 PM
onedayatatime13 onedayatatime13 is online now
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I have post visit blues. We had such a great time yesterday. Hopefully next year we will get good news and a program to come. I still cannot believe this journey started 18 months ago. Officially sentenced last year.

Time is moving, but still feels forever at times.
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  #4361  
Old 09-03-2018, 07:34 PM
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Originally Posted by TuggBoat View Post
We're only looking at 3 years, but its still a lot because I am barely out of high school and trying to start my life on my own. When he was arrested it kind of blindsided me because everything was fine. Although he calls me daily (almost daily when he isn't on lockdown from fighting) It's still hard though. I got so use to seeing him daily and having him that now I don't. And I try to stay busy, but it seems the thought he won't be home when I get home still creeps into my mind.
And I really don't have anyone to go out with because a lot of my friends left me when I stayed with him when all this began.
Sometimes I think it is easier if they know they will do time. The yoyo of being home has got to be hard and maybe in some ways harder. If there is stuff to be taken care of it is the responsible thing to do. If they stay, that time counts toward their sentence.

Also, can they stay out of trouble while on bail? Will they make their situation worse?

It is not easy which ever way you look at it. Just adapt and find routine. Have to keep going.
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  #4362  
Old 09-09-2018, 07:51 AM
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I miss my fiancť very much I havenít been able to visit in 8 months and although heís due to be released a few month itís hard. I was recently told that many landlords wonít rent to me because of his felony which is very disappointing everyone deserves a second chance.
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  #4363  
Old 09-09-2018, 04:28 PM
Mrs.Parker<3 Mrs.Parker<3 is offline
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Default i miss my everything

i miss my bf so bad its making me sick. hes been in jail for over 2 years already .. during that time he has prepared for trial, lost trial, has been waiting to be sentenced and is now waiting to see if we will get a retrial. looking back over the past 2 years and it seems like we have been through so much; ive been under so much stress with his situation and with other things going on in my life..it has been very very hard without my best friend by my side.. i try to tell myself to hang on and that things will get better and i wont be so sad and that tomorrow will bring a better day...but the truth is everyday gets worse an worse for me, the truth is i dont believe there is a light at the end of this tunnel, the truth is he isnt coming home i usually try to stay in my own lil fairly tale/ alternate reality in my head where he isnt gone, and hes here everyday a free man an happy, we're together living life to the fullest, where hes here to raise our son an teach him all the things a dad is supposed to teach their son, where we have our dream house and house full of kids like we always talked about before this nightmare began...thats how i usually make it through the day by jus making myself believe that we WILL actually get to do all those things when he comes home but not today, today im faced with the reality that the soonest my love will be home is 25 years from now, im in the beginning of a very very long road without him. i miss him so bad it hurts, he is my everything and has been for 9 years ..we were supposed to do this together forever..dont get me wrong im still here an ill never leave him, i will marry him one day even if it will be behind bars, ill be there for him everyday of his 25 years and thats a promise. i love this man more than anything so im not at all questioning if i can do this or not im just scared for myself and im definitely not looking forward to the many more days feeling this heartbroken empty numb hurting devastated hopeless longing for him filled days that i know lie ahead for me.

** my love knows me so well, he called me while i was writing this...he always knows what to say to make things a lil better for me, he really is my rock he is the best man i have ever met and for that ill wait for him forever!!! LaQuan Parker i love you soooooooo much baby I wish you cud be with me **

i do feel a little relief after hearing his voice but of course the sting never fully goes away. I know so many of you can relate, thank you for letting me share my thoughts

Last edited by Mrs.Parker<3; 09-09-2018 at 04:37 PM.. Reason: typo
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  #4364  
Old 09-09-2018, 04:57 PM
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This has been a great weekend. My man finally got approved for parole. And will be home next month. Eeekk!!
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  #4365  
Old 09-09-2018, 06:21 PM
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I missed my baby so much today. I think itís because I was suppose to talk to him last night and ended up falling asleep and missing his call. I get to see him on Tuesday and we all know that when youíre missing someone Tuesday is far lol. Iím hanging in there but I cannot wait to see his gazing eyes this week!
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  #4366  
Old 09-09-2018, 11:06 PM
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This has been a great weekend. My man finally got approved for parole. And will be home next month. Eeekk!!
Congrats!! I know you both will be so excited for him to be home.
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  #4367  
Old 09-10-2018, 11:35 AM
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The father of my daughter and my boyfriend cause we are not engaged and when he got locked up we were not living together because he got lost in drugs sad to say it took a toll on my 6 year old and of course on myself as well!!! We lost our apartment where we lived for 4 years and he went back to his moms and I moved in with my parents.
We would see each like a boyfriend girlfriend type of relationship and we were civil for the sake of our daughter.
He has been locked up since April/2018 he has missed a lot of important milestones for our daughter and itís hard!
Sheís at the age where she understands and she does not know where her dad is and I donít think I want to cause that damage to her because heís expected to be released October 2019
Sheís under the impression that heís working.
We get a monthly 15 Minute phone call and itís not long enough!
I havenít visit because this is not our first time last time he was locked up it was for about 6 months and he was at NCCF And now heís at Wasco State Prison Reception because he Violated his Parole for a Non Violent Crime
Well I had warned him and said I was not going to visit if it were to happen again and here I am having second thoughts thinking that maybe I should visit because Iím really missing him!
Iím not sure how I long I can keep calm lol
these last couple of weeks Iíve been soo anxious cause last week I did not get a letter and I thought maybe cause of Labor Day mail is backed up.
I have been feeling really lonely and missing him soo bad!!!
He has not seen his counselor in Reception but does anyone know if itís true that after they go to mainline depending on their points is what time they will actually complete of their sentence? Also that once they are out of Reception they are allowed more phone time?
Thank you for taking the time to read this and any feedback is very much appreciated.
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Old 09-10-2018, 12:11 PM
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Hey lpalmas - just a quick comment as this thread is for thoughts when you miss your man....but, you will find more information about Wasco in our Wasco State Prison forum HERE.. Basically though, yes - once he sees his counselor at reception he will then mainline (can take a few weeks) and he'll be sent to his "home prison" based on his classification, among other things. When he is out of reception he will be able to use the phone regularly (unless he has restrictions on him).
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  #4369  
Old 09-10-2018, 01:35 PM
lpalmas lpalmas is offline
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Thank yo for the info.

Itís soo hard when your missing your loved one and canít talk to them when you would like!
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  #4370  
Old 09-11-2018, 12:40 PM
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I am going through it hard today. I am usually the strong one but today I am in pieces. His EPRD is 9/19 I know its not the final date he still has credits they need to add and I see a lot of women who's LO has longer time to serve but damn I know it hurts just as bad! We all learn from this process, learn hard lessons and realize how much we need our LO out here with us. I for one realize how much I need him and all the little things I took for granted that are more important now than ever! This lesson goes both ways as we both do time.
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  #4371  
Old 09-11-2018, 12:44 PM
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Thank yo for the info.

Itís soo hard when your missing your loved one and canít talk to them when you would like!
Hell I just miss mine period
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  #4372  
Old 09-11-2018, 12:48 PM
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Hell I just miss mine period
Me too!!
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  #4373  
Old 09-11-2018, 04:45 PM
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Today has been 400 days since we last saw each other.

But we only have 17 to go until we see each other again. Then I'll see him three days straight. After that? I don't know. I'm disabled, we live in separate states, my mom just retired, and money to see him is limited. This trip is costing over $1,000 because he's in the middle of nowhere.

He's a lifer and I may only get to see him three days a year from here on out.
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  #4374  
Old 09-14-2018, 01:28 PM
NE030418 NE030418 is offline
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I am new to my relationship. I have known him my entire life (an i mean entire life my mother an his father grew up together an their families were friends) so I have known him my whole life. He was sentenced back in 2009 an we kept in touch with calls an letters an even their text messaging system at Menard Correctional since he has been gone but he just recently made it official back in March. I began to fall for him An developed feelings back in december of 2016. Now he is the love of my life an my best friend. I know I was made to love him An him love me. I can't picture my life without him but man it hurts to miss him An worry about him. Its crazy because growing up with him we would flirt back an forth at times. We would always hang out because we had the same group of friends too but we never really crossed the friend lines. We messed around a couple times (no sex just fooling around) an I always thought he might have feelings for me but I was never wanting to risk messing up our friendship or make it awkward for our families to be friends. Plus truth be told he wasn't my type physically. When he was locked up he stated working out an over the last almost 10 years he has grown up (he was arrested at 22 so he looked young an was a little heavy) now he lost some weight an he just grew up. I REGRET MORE THAN ANYTHING not having sex with him because we can't now. But mostly I just wish I could have him home where he belongs. I want to wake up to him An fall asleep in his arms. I want to kiss him anytime I want except 2x a visit. Does anything make just the hurting an wanting him any better?
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Old 09-15-2018, 07:38 PM
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Today I went for my weekly visit today, and I was granted a contact visit. I'm not sure if it was a mistake, or if the warden finally granted my request. But, It was absolutely perfect and so needed.
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