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Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison For everyone who has a husband, boyfriend or male partner incarcerated.

View Poll Results: Would you take his punishment for him?
I'd take a beating if it meant he could get out sooner! 31 24.41%
I'd let him take a beating to get out sooner. 24 18.90%
I'd do his time for him. 4 3.15%
He did the crime, he's gotta do the time. 68 53.54%
Voters: 127. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 02-03-2009, 03:12 PM
PTO-110524 PTO-110524 is offline
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Oh Hell no. He needs to accept personal accountability for his choices and actions (which he has). He got screwed by the 3 strikes law, but he did the petty crime knowing he was a 2-striker. To me that proves he's not real bright.

Bailing these people out from them being held accountable does nothing positive for them. If they are ever going to learn to fly right - they have to suffer the consequences of their actions!

Just my 2 cents, but I also know my hubby would never expect anyone to do his time for his guilty ass.
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Old 02-06-2009, 09:59 AM
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No and no again... There is no way I would take the punishment for his crime,, what so he can be in the world, not learning from his wrongs while i sit in prison and think about why i was a dummy and took his wrap... take beating for him,,, HELL NO. i DID THAT WHEN HE WAS OUT. Sorry, he can do every minute of his sentance,, dont get me wrong I love that man,,, but he has got to learn that he can not disrespect people and hurt people.... if he doesnt learn im sure he will be right back in prison, this time without me.......... i know that seems harsh but ladies the reality of it is this... i have spend almost 2 and half years waiting on him to come home,,, i have stood by his side, sent him money,,, and been there emotionally, yea i divorced him because he was understanding my worth to him, after three months no contact he finally got it,, so we are back together,,, but no way will i do his time,,,,
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Old 02-06-2009, 10:52 AM
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Originally Posted by Savvy Sista View Post
This is a crazy question . . . .

NO . . . I would not do the time . . . . why because I'm too cute to go to prison and I can't wear my cute shoes and clothes . . . . . . .

NO . . . I would not take any lashings or beating for him . . . why because that hurts and leaves scars . . . I have four children and I have enough war wounds of my own . . . . . . .

NO . . . I would not want him to take a lashing / or beating to get out early . . . why because he may not survive that . . . . . .

This sentence has been a reality check for him and he regrets being away from me and the kids because he is missing some inportant things in our lives . . . . so there is a lesson to be learned . . . . . .

I tell him all the time . . . GOD sat him down in stead of laying him down and he should feel BLESSED . . . . . . .
LOL, LOL, LOL my sentiments exactly...

And yes I realize that this is a hypothetical thread, but lashings? Maybe as a African-Canadian with very deep roots in North America (Slavery), and being mindful of the "cross my ancestors had to bear in the not so distant past", with thought of lashings and linching, just doesn't seem like an appropriate solution.

If he was dying, needed a lung, or a kidney, I'd give him my right arm, he already has my whole heart. But, all those sacrifices would be for the purpose of saving his life, for me sacrifice, myself and him to not benefit (learn anything from it), NOT.
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Old 03-01-2009, 09:33 AM
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I would take the lashes. He wouldn't want me to- he would forbid it. Me taking the lashes would be a worse punishment for him than serving his time- everytime he looked at me he would remember why it happened and he would think about it and he would feel guilty. I don't think he would do anything to put himself in that situation ever again. I think it would be very effective at teaching several lessons.
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Old 03-01-2009, 11:13 AM
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Oh hell no i'm not letting anyone beat me or going to prison for 8.5 years for his crime. I never did anything and still we're both doing the time.
Waitin' on 2014

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Old 03-02-2009, 10:14 PM
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if anyone would get a beating in order for him to get out early, it sure wouldnt be me!
but seriously he can do the time, theres no easy way out
that mentality is what got him in there in the first place

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Old 03-03-2009, 06:40 PM
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Oh no. He bought the ticket so he can take the ride.
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Old 07-19-2010, 11:20 AM
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I'd be willing to take them for him, but he wouldnt have it like that. he'd take them himself.
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Old 07-19-2010, 03:21 PM
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i would do ANYTHING for my man not to suffer... it hurts me more to see him hurt than actually hurting. does that make sense? lol
Being punished isn’t enjoyable while it is happening -- it hurts! But afterwards we can see the result, a quiet growth in grace and character. Hebrews 12: 11
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Old 07-19-2010, 05:25 PM
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Yes i would. My husband deserves to be home with me and our son. I would do whatever it took to get him home sooner! i love him with all my heart and would do anything to have our family back!
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Old 07-20-2010, 12:27 AM
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I would take some of his time/lashings to help him because I love him but not all. I didnt do the crime... he did. No one is perfect and I dont blame him at all.. his buttons were pushed BIG time and he didnt do 95% of what he was accused of. His charges are insane.. but the actual time in jail is very low for that charge. He got time like he has a misdemeanor and really he got a felony strike. He will have to live with that for the rest of his life and it will affect him and he doesnt deserve that.... but neither do I and just being with him I risk something bad happening because his ex is a bitter devious woman. All I can do is pray for safety from her and that she will have conviction in her life for her actions and straighten up
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Old 07-20-2010, 12:20 PM
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Default id take the lashings if he could take some too

yeah i'd take the lashings if that would mean he could be with me tonight. i agree with don't do the crime if you cant do the time but i didn't commit any crime other than love him and even though I'm not in prison I'm still doing the time with him
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Old 12-22-2015, 06:57 AM
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Hell no!
Follow your heart but take your brain with you...
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Old 12-22-2015, 11:18 AM
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Heck No! If I would have been the one who broke the law then I would but I've got a life and two kids and him being absolutely stupid had nothing to do with me. I'm a firm believer in you reap what you sow. His sentence is overboard but that's another subject. However, he would never ask me to either. He tells me all the time that if he could bear all the pain from me he would. Missing him is my punishment. And that's enough.
'I exist in two places. Here and where you are.'
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Old 12-22-2015, 05:12 PM
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No, I would not take lashings or do his time. He made his bed, now he must lay in it. I am not saying he should still be doing time, but he DID commit the crime.
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Old 12-22-2015, 07:08 PM
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Uh...No. Lol
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Old 12-22-2015, 07:20 PM
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I would not do any of his time and I didnt do any of his crime.
He wouldnt ask me to and I wouldnt offer to.
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Old 12-22-2015, 07:42 PM
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Originally Posted by IAmForeverHis View Post
I just had a visit with my guy tonight, and he said something that caught my attention. He said if he could he'd take lashings with a whip if it meant he could get out tomorrow. I said I'd take the lashings for him to get him out(he didn't like that at all).
I was just curious what you guys would do if given the option. Would you let him take some lashings instead of the prison time? Take the lashings for him?
Not in a million years. If he is dumb enough to get into this kind of trouble, then as for my husband he has to learn the hard way. We have children together, and all the emotional issues that came with what he did to land in prison, and what it did to our children you do the crime you do the time.
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Old 12-23-2015, 08:03 PM
GabesWifeyBoo GabesWifeyBoo is offline
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I love my man but hell no I'm not taking lashes for something I didn't commit. And it would be his choice whether he'd take the prison sentence or the lashes, I'd just do my job of being there helping him through either one.
Together Since: 1/2008
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Old 12-23-2015, 09:50 PM
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Nope would never do it nor offer. He made the mistake so he can take the punishment. But I know he would never ask or even if I was crazy enough to offer allow me to do it.
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Old 05-17-2019, 06:49 PM
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Oh Hell NOOOOO!!!! He did his crime and he has to do the time! I'm not taking any beatings to get him out early, I'm not doing his time for him and surely as hell not going to let him take a beating to get out sooner lol (he's not going for that...he isn't about to let no one put hands on him just to come home sooner...). He wouldn't even allow anyone else do his time or take a beat down to get him out sooner.
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Old 05-18-2019, 02:24 PM
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Considering the fact that I feel he paid for his "crime" long ago (and the other person involved got nothing) if a beating meant he could come home tomorrow, I would take it 100%.

Unfortunately as it stands he may never come home.
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Old 05-19-2019, 03:44 PM
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I would walk through Hell and half of Georgia to get him home sooner, so a beating I can heal from, yes, I'd do it in a heartbeat if given the chance. He's been there too long already, and for something he didn't do.
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Old 07-11-2019, 03:11 PM
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Absolutely not. I am convinced that getting locked up saved his life. As much as it breaks my heart, he is where he needs to be for now.

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Old 07-14-2019, 12:08 AM
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I wouldn't do his time for him, as he did the crime.... but in many ways I already feel as if I'm taking his punishments. My life has totally been thrown into chaos already and he hasn't even started serving his sentence. Today I received an email from an app that I use telling me that my account is disabled because someone, although they knew it wasn't me, has registered as a SO and their policy is to ban all people at that address.
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