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Old 03-13-2010, 11:48 PM
HesMyForever's Avatar
HesMyForever HesMyForever is offline
His Wife, عاكِفة
 

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Default Sex as sadaqa (charity)

Quote:
Now, every man knows what sexual things please him--but some men, particularly those who have not been married before and are therefore lacking experience, don't seem to know much about how to give the same pleasure to the woman; even worse, some men do know but they can't be bothered to make the effort. Yet this is vital if a marriage is to succeed and not just be a disappointing burden for the woman, and it is a vital part of one's Islamic duty.


It is not acceptable for a Muslim man just to satisfy himself while ignoring his wife's needs. Experts agree that the basic psychological need of a man is respect, while that of a woman is love. Neither respect nor love are things that can be forced--they have to be worked for, and earned. The Prophet (s) stated that in one's sexual intimacy with one's life partner there is sadaqa (worship through giving):


Allah's Messenger (pbuh) said: "In the sexual act of each of you there is a sadaqa." The Companions replied: "O Messenger of Allah! When one of us fulfils his sexual desire, will he be given a reward for that?" And he said, "Do you not think that were he to act upon it unlawfully, he would be sinning? Likewise, if he acts upon it lawfully he will be rewarded." (Muslim)
Quote:
A Muslim wife is not merely a lump of flesh without emotions or feelings, just there to satisfy a man's natural urges. On the contrary, her body contains a soul no less important in God's sight than her husband's. Her heart is very tender and delicate, and crude or rough manners would hurt her feelings and drive away love. The husband would be both foolish and immoral to act in any way unpalatable to her natural temperament, and a man selfishly seeking his own satisfaction without considering that of his wife is a selfish boor.
http://www.zawaj.com/articles/sex_sadaqa.html
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"Time as a measurement of love is eternal.
It extends beyond the borders of forever into the depths of infinity.
I love you this and much more."
~~M'love


Finally, happily married to m'love: 1/25/13.

Jeg lærer dansk (for et år) og norsk (for ti uger).

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