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Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison For everyone who has a husband, boyfriend or male partner incarcerated.

View Poll Results: Proteced or Unprotected
Protected 292 21.77%
Unprotected 1,049 78.23%
Voters: 1341. You may not vote on this poll

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  #76  
Old 01-17-2007, 12:06 AM
Valentina Valentina is offline
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I would suggest a biology 1 class at your local community college. DNA has nothing to do with being a "criminal" and maybe you shouldn't have kids until you learn some stuff because that is definitely a bad and wrong attitude to pass on to a child
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  #77  
Old 01-17-2007, 12:11 AM
Valentina Valentina is offline
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GOD, I just read these posts...having all these kids with disabilities? WTF are you talking about? If anyone has some bad dna here.....well, that's all I will say lest I get banned from my only social activity. My daughter (daughter of a lifer) is in a PhD program, hardly a criminal or retarded or disabled. The others are FINE, college grads and no one in prison except their dad. I can't believe some of the sh-- I read on here.
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  #78  
Old 01-17-2007, 12:25 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Valentina
I can't believe some of the sh-- I read on here.<<< I agree!
It's amazing how thoughtless some can be. And I'm not referring to emotions!! Posts like AnitaFoxx made make me wonder were some people were when God handed out intellect.

Personally, my husband and I haven't used a Jimmy in years. He's all that I need, and I can't have any more kids (thank God! 4 is enuf) so it's all about the fun
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  #79  
Old 01-17-2007, 12:59 AM
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Wow I love when it gets exciting. But what comes to my mind for AnitaFoxx is... why are you dating a inmate? If you can't think of having kids with him because of what might happen with his DNA then why be with him?? That seems really lame. He is good enough to date, do or marry but not good enough to have kids with? Hmmmmm?

It seems to me that you may want to re-exam your relationship with your inmate. It's probably not what your looking for.

Good luck with that Ms. Anita.
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  #80  
Old 01-17-2007, 10:30 AM
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It appears this thread is straying far from the original posters poll. Which is:
Proteced or Unprotected
Protected
Unprotected

Just a friendly reminder to stay on topic.

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  #81  
Old 01-17-2007, 10:49 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AnitaFoxx
Don't you girls ever worry that your children maybe criminal because they will have their father's dna? Don't you ever think how that affects a child having a criminal father? Wouldn't you all desire a person of no criminal background to enter into parenthood with? The reason I ask because you all sound like you don't think for what minute that children take after their fathers genetic makeup. See my man wants a child but I tell him I feel God will punish me and I would have a son and he would be heavy on my heart. I fear he would be in and out of jail God forbid do time. I just can't risk having a child by a criminal minded man. But now he is going to be a good man. I am too afraid of that. But would love to have a child by him.
Are you serious? Where in God's name do you come up with this information? I have two daughters with a CONVICTED FELON who did almost 16 years. And what? Are they both going to be criminals too? Highly unlikely because criminality is not hereditary. I have uncles who are cops--two of them have sons that are in prison. Please get your facts straight before you post.
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  #82  
Old 01-17-2007, 07:15 PM
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I prefer unprotected sex. But I think when he gets home until he goes to the clinic to get a 100% negative for everything, we will use protection.
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  #83  
Old 01-17-2007, 09:22 PM
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I definitly prefer unprotected for the obvious reasons as most people have already stated, but when he first came home I made him protect himself because he had gotten some tattoos and I wanted him to get tested first before we do it bare back, but as soon as those test results come back you better believe it.

Also I wanted to be protected when he first came home because he had to go to a halfway house and I don't want to get pregnant until all of this is completely over and I am able to have him next to me every night.
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  #84  
Old 01-18-2007, 11:13 PM
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well when he wasn't locked up we use to have unprotected sex and we use to get tested often but when he gets out he will be tested for everything before I decide to have sex without a condom
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  #85  
Old 01-20-2007, 08:34 AM
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I had a special needs child from a man who owns his own business and has never even so much received a traffic violation. Where do genes play a role again? Oh wait, maybe they come from his future step father he met when he was 2 I can gurantee there isn't ONE gene that predisposes ANYONE to go to prison! And genetic diseases or anomolies can come from ANYONE in the family, not just the incarcerated father. Just an FYI

For the women in this forum that have met their men while in prison, I most certainly would ask for testing IF you see a need. Course I'm a FIRM believer of testing for anyone walking the streets or in prison nowadays You just can't be too sure anymore! It's just called being plain responsible

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  #86  
Old 01-21-2007, 03:25 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tested Love
Which do you prefer?? And why??


For some reason, baby has it stuck in his head that we are no longer using protection when he comes home. Lately, he speaks of going "bare" and I'm like WTH??? The last time I trusted a man on that level...I ended up with a STD. Luckily it was cureable, but I vowed that I would never take myself through that again. It took a toll on me emotionally. I've never mentioned the STD thing to baby, and I'm sort of afraid to because I don't want him to see me in another light.


Does whether you have (un)protected sex with a man or not equate to how much you care for him? If your man expected that from you...what would you do?


How in the world do I handle this????
Have him go through an examiniation (check for all std's) once he gets out, and if you plan on marrying him and having his children and he is CLEAN, sure you can go "bare" but just make sure to take all necessary precautions first. Better to be safe than sorry.
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  #87  
Old 01-21-2007, 08:45 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by venicespirit
For everyone that is set on not bagging when their man gets out - Don't be foolish - Protect yourself and make him test first!
I feel you, but last time my man was down he came out with a clean bill
(on paper) I expect they'll test him again this next time before he comes home.
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  #88  
Old 01-21-2007, 11:21 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AnitaFoxx
Don't you girls ever worry that your children maybe criminal because they will have their father's dna? Don't you ever think how that affects a child having a criminal father? Wouldn't you all desire a person of no criminal background to enter into parenthood with? The reason I ask because you all sound like you don't think for what minute that children take after their fathers genetic makeup. See my man wants a child but I tell him I feel God will punish me and I would have a son and he would be heavy on my heart. I fear he would be in and out of jail God forbid do time. I just can't risk having a child by a criminal minded man. But now he is going to be a good man. I am too afraid of that. But would love to have a child by him.
Genetic make up gives us the bodies we have not the thought process!!!! Just because you have a child with a "criminal" doesn't mean that they are going to turn out to be a crazed serial killer! This would have to be one of the most absurd things I've ever heard.
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  #89  
Old 01-21-2007, 11:58 AM
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Cool Unprotected

I voted unprotected, me and my man never used protection , but we both have a clean bill, no STD's here. We trust each other and I know he hasn't cheated on me and he knows I haven't cheated on him. That's enough for us. I had my tubes tied 13 years ago. So no kids for us. We already had kids in our previous relationships. It's not that I wouldn't have his baby, we are just older now and we want to do the selfish thing now. We both had kids at a young age and are ready for our life together, just the two of us.
Now if you don't plan on marrying your bf, than yeah I would say use protection, and even if you do, you protection if thats what you want. Its your body, he needs to respect your decision. At least until you can see the lab work and know for sure he's clean. Then you can make an educated decision. Remember, its what your comfortable with. It doesn't have anything to do with how much you care about your man, if that's what you want to do, he should respect and care enough about you, and do it that way until you are comfortable enough to ride bareback.
Good luck in your decision.......best wishes to the both of you.....

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  #90  
Old 01-21-2007, 06:21 PM
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I didn't vote. Cause all honestly I dont think it's right to have unprotected sex, But Travis is the man, Im going to marry and have kids with. So with him we wont be protected. it all depends how u feel about this man and where your relationship is at.
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  #91  
Old 01-28-2007, 03:30 PM
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Hes the only man I was never protected with, ever. I have always used protection unless or until the man was tested. Better safe then sorry I guess. When Jeremy comes home he will have to be tested before we can go unprotected again, thats just my own personal rule.. not just with him but for anyone, period.
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  #92  
Old 01-28-2007, 04:44 PM
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i agree with majority of the females before, i want us to both get tested before we have unprotected sex. although i know he wouldn't agree with it but i want us to get tested every three to six months so we'll both know we don't have anything eventhough we'll be faithful to each other. i work in medical records at a health department and i have to call the patients when their results come back positive on their std-hiv test. so i started getting tested regurlarly but he didn't like going too often when he was out especially since we're married
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  #93  
Old 01-29-2007, 06:19 PM
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We are starting our family when he gets out so i voted unprotected. I would have voted that way anyways because we are married and i just don't see the point in having protected . Plus its more fun bareback.
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  #94  
Old 01-29-2007, 06:23 PM
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monogamy is my protection.
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  #95  
Old 01-30-2007, 09:16 PM
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Once he comes home it's gonna be skin on skin (with depo or whatever) Heck, I'll be a married woman, I ain't having none of that comdom business
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  #96  
Old 02-15-2007, 07:35 AM
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Monogomy is also my protection......
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  #97  
Old 02-15-2007, 08:39 AM
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Getting Tested is My protection,,along with condoms
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  #98  
Old 02-15-2007, 11:16 AM
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When my man comes home we will be using protection. We have 3 kids already and we don't need another at this point. Maybe after we are a little more settled and it wouldn't matter if i would end up pregnant then we will definitely do the bareback thing but until then protection all the way.
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  #99  
Old 02-15-2007, 01:50 PM
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Well first things first, I think some ppl (very few) who post here are some of the DUMBEST ppl I've seen in a long time. I understand having your own opinion, but to just be stupid and expose it is something else. I just shake my head.
But for me I would prefer unprotected, it just feels better, lets face it. But my health requires protected. He said they get an exit exam when they get paroled out. I want to see it, just as I'm sure he wants to see a copy of my exam. What good it us planning a life together if neither of us are going to be around to enjoy it.
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  #100  
Old 02-15-2007, 03:34 PM
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I think if you are 2 people who are in a mon. relationship, then it should be alright to go "bareback" (only if theres true trust) but if your not sure then bag it, you can catch stuff even clorox wont scrub off
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