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Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison For everyone who has a husband, boyfriend or male partner incarcerated.

View Poll Results: Does he ask for too much money?
No, not at all 333 59.25%
Sometime he does 153 27.22%
Way to much money 51 9.07%
He sends money instead 40 7.12%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 562. You may not vote on this poll

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  #51  
Old 05-14-2011, 11:38 PM
inhishands82 inhishands82 is offline
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I sent mine money and ordered things for him because I had it at the time. He feels awful asking me for anything.
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  #52  
Old 06-05-2011, 09:56 PM
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He gets money and packages, but I want and can do that. Is her ever excessive in asking... no. And the times when I couldn't he totally understood.
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  #53  
Old 06-05-2011, 11:19 PM
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He doesn't ask for money for things that aren't needed. There is a monthly budget and money to send him is included in that. If an unexpected expense comes up, we discuss that and make adjustments to the budget as needed. He just moved so he will need to get some things but he doesn't try and go overboard. In fact he just sent me this email:

U KNOW THAT I JUST GOT HERE AND IT'S SOMETHINGS I NEED SO IF ITS OK WITH U, I GO 2 THE STORE TUE. AND I NEED 2 GET SOME THINGS BUT IM NOT GOING 2 SPEND ANY MONEY THAT U SEND ME ON OTHER THINGS UNLESS U SAY ITS ALRIGHT SO I NEED U 2 LET ME KNOW. LOVE U
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  #54  
Old 06-06-2011, 08:37 AM
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My bf doesn't ask for money from me. But he does expect it to be money on the phone. And the amount that I have to spend is a pretty penny. But joke wit him that I want half back.
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  #55  
Old 06-06-2011, 05:53 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Erics4ever View Post
He doesn't ask for money for things that aren't needed. There is a monthly budget and money to send him is included in that. If an unexpected expense comes up, we discuss that and make adjustments to the budget as needed. He just moved so he will need to get some things but he doesn't try and go overboard. In fact he just sent me this email:

U KNOW THAT I JUST GOT HERE AND IT'S SOMETHINGS I NEED SO IF ITS OK WITH U, I GO 2 THE STORE TUE. AND I NEED 2 GET SOME THINGS BUT IM NOT GOING 2 SPEND ANY MONEY THAT U SEND ME ON OTHER THINGS UNLESS U SAY ITS ALRIGHT SO I NEED U 2 LET ME KNOW. LOVE U

I like that. I think that is so thoughtful that he would do that. More guys need to be like
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  #56  
Old 06-06-2011, 06:16 PM
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His mom is sending him some money; I want to, but I'm 34 weeks pregnant and I won't get any paid leave, because I've only been at my workplace for about 3 months. So my income will be frozen until I get back to work after my baby is born. He doesn't want me to send a dime, though, despite my protests at wanting to help him.

I have bought and sent him three books, though.
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  #57  
Old 06-06-2011, 06:20 PM
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If anything he only asks I try my best to keep money on the phone and I always do ....When I can I send him a care package and When I can't he understands....
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  #58  
Old 06-06-2011, 09:28 PM
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My fiance asks me to bring him 50 dollars each week (the maximum they are allowed) but from his bank account. He is on disability so he gets 600 dollars a month, which still leaves 400 dollars in the bank. We're trying to save as much as that as possible but he tells me to use it for gas (to come see him), and I'm sure soon for diapers and formula when we come to that. That being said, I wouldn't send him money for all that crazy stuff, even if it is his money! He had many chances (he left several rehabs) and finally the people who he had the contract with said no way and put his ass in jail. So he has no one to blame but himself, and i'm sorry if jail isn't fun but it's jail.
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  #59  
Old 06-06-2011, 10:46 PM
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mine does not! i am a fulltime student & he knows what i send is all i can for that month.. day to day lol!
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  #60  
Old 06-07-2011, 10:05 AM
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OMG yes he does. He acts like I'm rich or something. But I send him what I can cause his family don't help at all.

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  #61  
Old 06-07-2011, 12:28 PM
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Tony dosent ask for anything. He told me not to send him money because he doesn't want me to feel like he's using me. I insisted though that when I have some extra money I will send it to him. My reasons for sending money though are kinda selfish. I want to send him money for phone calls so that I can talk to him more often, and for picture tickets so that we can get our picture taken at visitation. I also want him to be comfortable.. I know that I shouldn't spoil him because I don't want him to be comfortable there, but I also want to be supportive. Right now he is getting stamps from the poker table.. and I dont know how comfortable I am with that..
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  #62  
Old 06-07-2011, 02:38 PM
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When my fiance went in (about 4 mos ago) he didn't ask for anything..but when I got my income tax he wanted tennis shoes, long sleeve shirts, a radio, lots of coffee, soups and snacks. I've also paid for his attorney, contacts shipped to the jail, plus a ton of phone calls. Now that I'm back to payday to payday he gets very little and he's ok with that. He's already given me permission to sell his truck and any belongings if I need to. I know he's spoiled, but he takes care of me when he's home and that's what relationships are..one gives when one has. JMO
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  #63  
Old 06-07-2011, 02:47 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ejandcgirl View Post
My fiance asks me to bring him 50 dollars each week (the maximum they are allowed) but from his bank account. He is on disability so he gets 600 dollars a month, which still leaves 400 dollars in the bank. We're trying to save as much as that as possible but he tells me to use it for gas (to come see him), and I'm sure soon for diapers and formula when we come to that. That being said, I wouldn't send him money for all that crazy stuff, even if it is his money! He had many chances (he left several rehabs) and finally the people who he had the contract with said no way and put his ass in jail. So he has no one to blame but himself, and i'm sorry if jail isn't fun but it's jail.
Just an FYI: If that's SSI or SSDI once the government finds out he's locked up they'll cut him off and charge him with an overpayment for the months he received while inside.
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  #64  
Old 06-07-2011, 03:12 PM
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My guy told me music...free downloaded and burned on my laptop....and food....the microwave kind... is all he will allow me to send him. Oh and my poems!! He knows I have a daughter to care for and doesn't want to take away from her. I think that says a lot about him.
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  #65  
Old 06-07-2011, 07:38 PM
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He doesn't ask. Luckily his job pays pretty good for in there, and his mom sends money monthly his mamaw does about every 3 months. Since I'm barely making my bills that is a load of me. I send him money at tax time and a package at christmas.
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  #66  
Old 06-07-2011, 08:26 PM
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The only time he's ever asked me for money was when he had nothing and hadn't gotten anything from his mom, sister or dad. Otherwise he acts like he doesn't want me to give him money. He doesn't even want me to send him books and insists he doesn't need them. Whenever I do give him money he thanks me for it. I love that he appreciates it rather than expects it, it makes me want to spoil him more and surprise him with a couple books because I know it will make his day
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  #67  
Old 06-23-2011, 12:52 AM
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My man has his own money. He keeps his own money. He did very well before he went away. He supports his daughter from in there and he takes care of himself. He tried to even send me money to get an apt a few months ago. What kind of bum 'B' would I be accepting money from my man thats locked up? It would be different if I had children with him or something. But I dont. So he is good.
But if he did need things. I would help if I could. But all that mess with playstations and all that. Never. I didnt know they had that in lock up.
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  #68  
Old 06-23-2011, 01:09 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TyronesWife View Post
Just an FYI: If that's SSI or SSDI once the government finds out he's locked up they'll cut him off and charge him with an overpayment for the months he received while inside.
yea that very well could happen but they don't always find out...i know someone whos down right now and they still getting their SSI checks and it's been awhile already.
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  #69  
Old 06-23-2011, 09:26 AM
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Where my hubby is there are no jobs to have, no playstations, or portable tv's. You can't send a care package, all you can send is money for food, hygiene, stamps ect. I try to send him $100.00 a month so he can eat better and have lots of paper to write me. I keep money on the phones so we can talk everyday. There is def not any lavish luxuries available in this prison, if there were I would let him have them.
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  #70  
Old 06-23-2011, 10:08 AM
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He has friends and family who put money on his books, but his mom lost his job so he asked if I could, he understands if I can't. I send what be can for stamps, and writhing supplies, hygiene, and some food. He is happy if I can send anything. But I know he hates to ask. He even offers to send me the receipts so I know what he spent on. But I trust him.
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  #71  
Old 06-23-2011, 01:21 PM
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"He wants new shoes, and he just went in 3 months ago. He wants monies for a TV, PlayStation, Shorts, new sweats.
He also calls everyday, more then once. She sends money for him to be able to write, and get snacks, and hygiene items."


I'm still stuck on the TV and PlayStation - where is he at that you get all those fun things...to yourself? And I know I'm going to get in trouble for this next statement but...at what point did prison become a place to go and sit on your booty and play video games all day?
I'm should tell my step brother...I'm sure he'd be thrilled and ask where he could sign up.

Anyways...V. doesn't ask for much...so I'm more than willing to give it when I can...but even I would start drawing the line at all of that and say you're there for a reason - why don't you tough it out for a little bit and think about what you did....while I provide for our family. Just saying....
Poor girl. That sucks.
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  #72  
Old 06-23-2011, 05:46 PM
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He doesn't ask. I send what I can when I can. Plus these phone calls isn't cheap. We have five kids to care for also.
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  #73  
Old 06-24-2011, 10:41 AM
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Nope.. I have sent a total of 50 dollars in 4 1/2 years. And that was actually just a couple weeks ago because his mother died. He had a paying job and his parents sent him a little money.
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  #74  
Old 06-24-2011, 02:33 PM
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he only asks for money when he is out of money for stamps & food lol the last time i sent was , i dont even remember lol :P
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  #75  
Old 06-28-2011, 07:55 PM
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Funny my man is getting out in less then 6 months. Why today he asked me for a favor. Thinking he would ask me to call someone for a cell mate. Oh no, I was totally wrong. He asked for a $100 to get a tv. What? He was the one to say, he didn't need something like that. I was shocked, and asked if he was serious. I mean you already did 6 months and 6 to go. Why now you need a tv? I was heated....
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