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Friends & Families of Addicts Information for coping, dealing & living with a loved one's addictive behavior.

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  #26  
Old 10-20-2009, 02:12 PM
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Addicted_one Addicted_one is offline
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You have heard it all before but yes... alcoholism/addiction is a family disease so it affects our loved ones. Go to http://www.celebraterecovery.com/ or Alanon.org or nar-anon.com and you start to go to meetings that, I believe, will be the best thing you can do for him or you plus like it was said that will show him you commitment to him and his recovery. Good luck girl. All three of those programs are 12 step based and they are all good. If he be an addict like I be an addict you will need all the support you and he can get!
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  #27  
Old 10-20-2009, 02:18 PM
Onedaycloser13 Onedaycloser13 is offline
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Originally Posted by tee.dot.q View Post
Bethy, Alcoholics come in many forms - not just the stereotypical every day fall-down-drunk variety. My ex was an alcoholic, the binge drinking kind. He would go days without a drink and BANG - drink 40 beers in a night (no joke). He was an alcoholic without a doubt.

If Marc feel as though he needs help for addiction then he needs help for that addiction. I agree with the other poster that said that he would need to complete most of this journey on his own. You can go to the AA for family members to learn some mechanisms to help him deal with his struggles but it's one of those things they need to stand up on their own and accomplish.

I know you only mean to do what you can, and to be there for him.
This is exactly right because sometimes you have a binge drinker that drinks only when something is going wrong in their lives and lose control. Danya is right in all her posts when it comes to the alcoholic part of it. I grew up with an alcoholic mother and father, and since as old as I can remember attended alateen meetings(yep they have them for the kids also), and was around AA and Alanon for close to two decades. Alanon will help so much with understanding the alcoholic mind and mentality. It will also help understand ways you may or may not have enabled. I agree, he needs to go on this journey alone. He has to decide that he needs help and go get it. Although, many meeting are closed meetings anyway, this means only alcholics can attend. You would only be able to attend the open meetings, which anyone can go to. Also sometimes the alcoholic is hesitant to talk if someone they love are there for fear that person may judge them etc. and they NEED to talk in the meetings. By the way when he gets in to the meetings they usually get a sponser and that is the person he would call if he gets a craving or needs encouragement. Most times the sponser will pick up for meetings and develops a very close relationship with the person they are sponsering. Help this helps!
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