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Loving a Long-term Sentenced Offender For those whose loved one is serving 10+ years.

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  #1  
Old 02-06-2018, 08:59 PM
mrsag mrsag is offline
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Default Anyone else who has to wait 10 years before your man comes out?

I need support ladies. My man is eligible for parole in 2028. I need advises on how to NOT loose my mind before then. What if hes not granted a parole? I love him to death, but Im really concerned about the possibility of him never coming out again. How do you cope with this? How do you stay focused?
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Old 02-06-2018, 09:02 PM
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Mine has parole in 2034 I cope with it by knowing that one day all the things Im doing on the outside without him will be worth it in the end and most of all I try to keep myself busy. Writing and visiting are sort of therapeutic to me as he is always there to listen to me. My advice would be to find a hobby or something that you enjoy and go from there. Good luck !
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Old 02-06-2018, 09:12 PM
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Do not, then, worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow shall have its own worries. Each day has enough evil of itself." Matthew 6:34

It is easy to get overwhelmed looking at the big picture, so I choose to focus on today only, taking it one day at a time. We can always get through one day. Tomorrow is not even guaranteed.
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Old 02-06-2018, 09:48 PM
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My husband will be going on 8 years on the 10th of this month rn. And has 8 more to go on a 20 year sentence. So no, your not alone. It gets hard and there are days when you just want to scream, but when you look at the smile on their faces it just reminds you how you can’t leave them behind.
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Old 02-07-2018, 11:11 AM
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May 2026
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Old 02-07-2018, 11:12 AM
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You ladies are simply amazing
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Old 02-10-2018, 02:45 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mrsag View Post
I need support ladies. My man is eligible for parole in 2028. I need advises on how to NOT loose my mind before then. What if hes not granted a parole? I love him to death, but Im really concerned about the possibility of him never coming out again. How do you cope with this? How do you stay focused?
Stay strong and keep yourself busy. Pray that he does get paroled, and don't worry about the other option til that time comes... You'll feel what to do then. I actually met mine while he's in. He has 12 more years, with a possibility that's cut in half if he gets the correct paperwork through. So I was asking myself the same thing. Good luck love... You'll be okay.
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Old 02-10-2018, 03:49 AM
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I will have waited exactly 10 years when my husband gets out
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Old 02-10-2018, 04:04 AM
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Mine has 2 consecutive life sentences but has spent already 24+ years in and they are getting him ready for release or at least Minimum, the light at the end of the tunnel is getting pretty bright... I've been in his life for "only" 3+ years though... let's hope he get's out before I'm on a walker
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Old 02-10-2018, 11:01 PM
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Hello. This is the first time that I write anything here, but I wanted to say that I understand. It's not my husband's first time being away, but he does have a longer sentence this time. So far (this time), he's been away almost 7 yrs & has more to go before he is released. We are getting older, & our children are grown. Work keeps me busy. I also pray everyday. Writing can help. A hobby can help if you have one. I try to stay positive. Also, try not to think about the "what if's" - try not to worry about the unknown. & Your feelings are valid! It's ok to be sad, happy, mad, upset. & Thanks to the other people who are sharing on here because it's helpful to know that others understand!
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Old 02-11-2018, 12:36 PM
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Feb 2062
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Old 02-11-2018, 12:50 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MizzyMuffling View Post
Mine has 2 consecutive life sentences but has spent already 24+ years in and they are getting him ready for release or at least Minimum, the light at the end of the tunnel is getting pretty bright... I've been in his life for "only" 3+ years though... let's hope he get's out before I'm on a walker
No walker should be needed. It should be his pleasure and honor to carry you in his arms.
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Old 02-11-2018, 01:42 PM
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Quote:
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Feb 2062


Holy shi***
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Old 02-11-2018, 04:23 PM
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Yep Feb 2062...drug crime... done 17 already
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Old 02-12-2018, 11:16 AM
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The last time my guy was incarcerated he was sentenced to 57 years for a drug crime. We got his sentence modified and he served 10 years. It was rough but we were able to get through it.


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Yep Feb 2062...drug crime... done 17 already
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Old 02-12-2018, 12:46 PM
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I am so sorry.... Being from Scandinavia these sentences never cease to horrify me Not saying that to be holier than thou, just that it feels so damn inhumane

Sending you all loads of strength
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Old 04-08-2018, 04:30 AM
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Just keep positive, stay busy and pray that the time goes by faster than what it really is.

I have until 2068, so I know there are some days that are harder than others but if you weren't strong enough to handle it, you wouldn't have been put thru this test,


You got this!!
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Old 05-19-2018, 04:45 PM
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My Love One has 6 more years tp go.. He already has 13 years in... This is my first time dating someone who has the long of a time.. I always said I wouldn't date anybody facing this long of time.. but here I am in love and waiting for my love.. Its hard everyday because I'm not used to going through ...I just finished obtaining my associates degree and he is my biggest fan .. Through our letters and phones I'm able to get through it day by day
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Old 05-22-2018, 04:55 PM
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We're on year 14.5. Yes, 14.5! As you already know, being a prison wife is hardest thing to endure. But I love that man with every fiber in my being. He'll be out in less than 4 years and hopefully sooner than that with all these milestone credits and possible law changes. My advice is to keep as busy as possible, visit as much as possible, write, and accept calls. I've had my hard days and my "I GOT THIS" days, needless to say that bad days outweigh the "I GOT IT" days. I've had a great family support system and a good group of friends that keep me sane. My faith is in Jesus that everything will be ok.

Be strong love! He needs you the most right now.

Prayers and hugs!
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Old 05-22-2018, 06:13 PM
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We are on year 11 with 3 years to go. Faith, communication, trust, honesty, patience and love are key. Pray everyday! Good luck doll
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Old 05-26-2018, 02:57 PM
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OMG that's damn near 50 years! Have you known him the entire time he's been incarcerated?

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Yep Feb 2062...drug crime... done 17 already
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Old 05-27-2018, 12:41 AM
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My husband has been in 16 years on a to life sentence. He has had a couple of tries at community corrections but failed both times. He can try again in 3 months.

I've walked this road with him for the past almost 8 years. He was my childhood sweetheart. I was married to a terminally ill man at the time, but I knew that I wanted to be with him next. We have been married a year (in 9 hours.)

I may never have him home to me, but he is the ONE for me. I will do his life until whenever he leaves, no matter how he leaves.
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