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Coming Home Dedicated to discussions about our loved ones that are coming home soon. Discussions here should not fit any other category.

View Poll Results: How would you "deal"with your coming home partner admitting they're scared?
I would get him mental help immediate asap!!!Right into therapy at home." 16 25.40%
I would try to talk with him til'day of coming home/and after the best i can... 33 52.38%
NOPE.This is a sign of him/her being too "messed up mentally."Too much work..." 1 1.59%
I am not sure.My partner was HAPPY getting out,so he never was frightened etc.al., 5 7.94%
Sad to say but some men are just too damaged,mentally to get their "mind right." 3 4.76%
I wouldn't abandon him/her UNLESS i really had to. 7 11.11%
Other...Please comment below.Thank you,PTO members." 8 12.70%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 63. You may not vote on this poll

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  #1  
Old 09-08-2017, 04:03 PM
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Unhappy Coming Home in 9 weeks.Do all men get out of prison "frightened to death?"

I've been so happy with him getting out.Still am. .I am a happy lady either way lol I have a nice positive God-Blessed safe healthy life.God is good.But my loved one is going through something mentally that i have not seen the entire almost 5 long happy years i've known him.More than anything we are bestie's,and i love him.
However, i now really do need PTO (real/genuine advice now)about coming "home." Ok, so my sweetie just called as always, right on time.He sound so miserable on "some days,sad and happy as can be, like a kid in the candy store on other days and nights." Today he said, "Sweetness, i am not sure i can do the whole "release from prison/freedom etc., after almost eleven years if they are shipping me off to a halfway house in the same bad hood area i am from. I was not expecting this.I am overwhelmed with NOT you sweetness, so we are sgood,we really are.But i'm frightened ma.I am "frighten to death." I am so scared. He has not sounded this way, mind you, prior to what his new counselor said 2 days or so ago. (See M.W.I. forum gracia) thank you.

(I wrote a lengthy new update a day ago, on our journey-latest hurdle.)Now,i post in "COMING HOME"as he is just about out finally, or so i thought.Mentally he is really going through it in a way i am not used of,but i do know some signs in the "real world"of Bi-Polar et.al., and i am just sad for him right now.I pray for him as i pray to GOD and have prayer studies 4x a week. His nice counselor who is new(she care enough to call me 2x this week)and she told me what he said, and she is really trying to get him into one near me by thanksgiving weekend(that friday he is released or thanksgiving evening before midnight.) She said to me, he look "bad" when he was telling me this, almost to the point they assume he might try to "do something?"She did not say what though.But then he told her,"I will be ok when i go call my sweetness.(his nickname for me) His halfway house will be in same bad area. (smh) Counselor agreed,as i do that he do need this for his own good), i.e., drug program/family abuse(trauma)program et.al.,however being in the same bad area, he is sure to fail.(maybe)but now he is even saying he will today to the counselor IF he is forced back in the same location he did his crimes in and drugs on each corner et.al.., troubled family member near by.
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My loved one, for the first time has now admit something he never said to me or any one before.For the past few days since we learn the bad news of him having to stay in his old stomping ground to start his halfway house stay for (3)months, then he can re-apply to come home with me in a suburban safe residential area 1 state over and or in NC by end of year.
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He informed his counselor (2x now) "I will not be able to make it if i do,it will RUIN me, because i planned on going home to my fiancee' house,away "from all that is bad for me."I will write more below soon.But, how would you deal with this?I never ever seen his "mental issues"this deep and at weeks prior to release? Is this NORMAL?He literally again utilized the words, "I am frighten to death,of the real world.The "perfect"world."I tell him,"The world is not perfect.He said, "I am just not sure i want to go home now meaning to the "halfway house,near his way."But he said,"We are still good."I will not lose you to what i am "battling in my head." I am just scared/frightened to death. I am not able to "make it" in the perfect world et.al.,"but then he smile and say,"i am ok."it's all good. I have you,sweetness." I am concerned now,because he never said it like that before,so sad.depressed etc., and he never said any of this before...Never.
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#snuggling each wknd,til home.
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Old 09-08-2017, 05:05 PM
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It's a major life change. It's normal to be scared about major life changes even when they're positive like getting married or getting released from prison.

Getting released after a long sentence means having to get along in a world where you don't know how to pump gas or make a phone call or apply for a job any more. That's scary.
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Old 09-08-2017, 09:02 PM
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It is normal for them to be scared of release. The closer they get to that release date, the MORE SCARED they get. They feel almost like impending doom is getting closer and closer. He has been locked up on the inside for many years. He is institutionalized. He has been told what and when to eat, when to sleep, how to dress, how to make his bed. Coming out into the "real world" where you dont have that, a lot of them feel like they dont know what to do with themselves. They have gotten so use to being inside, the outside scares them. They feel there is too many options, so many things they have to accomplish right away, they feel they have to get "back on their feet" and be "normal" again right away the second they step outside those gates. Its very overwhelming. (I am not saying that I know these things from personal experience of being in prison, but I have 2 exes who have been to prison and they both said the same thing. The things I am sharing with you.) They put a lot of pressure on themselves to "succeed" right away. They dont allow themselves time to adjust. Because it is a HUGE ADJUSTMENT.

I feel all you can do is be there for your man. Listen to him and listen to his fears. Acknowledge that his fears are real. Tell him it is ok that he feels that way, and he isnt "stupid or dumb" for feeling that way.
Let him know that you acknowledge his fears. Let him know that you are going to do everything in your power to try to help him so that those fears don't come to a reality and come true. That you are here for him. Let him know how much you believe in him. Let him know that you are a safe place for him to express these fears. That he doesnt have to hide them from you. Best advice I can give.. like I said above, just be there for him. Dont make it seem like his fears are irrational. I do not believe that this is a "mental illness" issue. This is a true, legitimate fear. Its like if you move to a brand new country and dont know the people or the language, but you have to figure out how to live and work and get by. Its all strange and new. Thats what it is like for them when they get out.
I have rambled on enough here I believe.
PM me anytime!!
I am praying for you and your fiance!!! I hope everything turns out the best. xoxo
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Old 09-09-2017, 11:06 PM
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It is good that he is expressing his feelings to you because he is allowing himself to be vulnerable. He is letting you know he needs you. I agree with Jennyjo. Validate his feelings and let him know those feelings are normal and okay. It is hard for men, especially, to share feelings other than the basic happiness and anger. Many times their feelings of fear, disappointment, frustration, sadness, etc. present as anger because that is easier and they can still feel strong and manly.

Remind him that he has had to deal with disappointments, unfamiliar situations, temptations, etc. over his entire incarceration and he has developed strategies to deal with those things. He may have used the idea of "consequences" to help "control" his choices/behavior on the inside and he can still think in that way. Try to remind him that there is no rush and he only needs to take his growth one day at a time. If that feels too overwhelming, he can take it one hour at a time. Remind him that you are there for him when he feels like he needs to be reeled in from the the outside forces that are tugging on him/stressing him.

I think you should celebrate the fact that he is expressing his very raw emotions. My husband can talk to me about anything! Anything! Anything except feelings that make him feel like he is fragile or less of a man. It frustrates me sometimes, but he swears he really is okay and doesn't have those fears/insecurities/sadness, etc. I think he'll feel some better about these kinds of expressions when he no longer confined and surrounded by tons of testosterone, but until then I let him be comfortable with the man he has to be in there. He may actually always be this way because he really is his father's son in that aspect.

I am sending you prayers and positive energy!
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Old 09-10-2017, 07:56 PM
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Mine gets released in 2 months. I will pray for you.
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Old 09-10-2017, 08:21 PM
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Also its probably normal to be scared of coming home to freedom. Just one day at a time. Its all about choices. Stay away from situations that will make you fall down. Im sure things have changed since he was home.
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Old 09-11-2017, 09:26 AM
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Half of it is the other inmates telling him how bad the halfway house is going to be. It happens all the time with other inmates talking about how bad the halfway house is. In my experience it wasnt as bad as they made it out to be but still wasn't great. Its really all about how u choose to deal with it.
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Old 09-11-2017, 04:49 PM
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I would be very surprised of he was scared, but I would do anything I can to make him comfortable, never leave him alone, whatever he needs or asks for. Build a nest he can come home to.
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Old 09-11-2017, 08:44 PM
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The ones I worry about most are the ones who have no fear of release. Many of those guys have no intentions of changing the behavior that got them in prison in the first place.
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Old 09-11-2017, 10:04 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jennyjo2210 View Post
It is normal for them to be scared of release. The closer they get to that release date, the MORE SCARED they get. They feel almost like impending doom is getting closer and closer. He has been locked up on the inside for many years. He is institutionalized. He has been told what and when to eat, when to sleep, how to dress, how to make his bed. Coming out into the "real world" where you dont have that, a lot of them feel like they dont know what to do with themselves. They have gotten so use to being inside, the outside scares them. They feel there is too many options, so many things they have to accomplish right away, they feel they have to get "back on their feet" and be "normal" again right away the second they step outside those gates. Its very overwhelming. (I am not saying that I know these things from personal experience of being in prison, but I have 2 exes who have been to prison and they both said the same thing. The things I am sharing with you.) They put a lot of pressure on themselves to "succeed" right away. They dont allow themselves time to adjust. Because it is a HUGE ADJUSTMENT.

I feel all you can do is be there for your man. Listen to him and listen to his fears. Acknowledge that his fears are real. Tell him it is ok that he feels that way, and he isnt "stupid or dumb" for feeling that way.

Let him know that you acknowledge his fears. Let him know that you are going to do everything in your power to try to help him so that those fears don't come to a reality and come true. That you are here for him. Let him know how much you believe in him. Let him know that you are a safe place for him to express these fears. That he doesnt have to hide them from you. Best advice I can give.. like I said above, just be there for him. Dont make it seem like his fears are irrational. I do not believe that this is a "mental illness" issue. This is a true, legitimate fear. Its like if you move to a brand new country and dont know the people or the language, but you have to figure out how to live and work and get by. Its all strange and new. Thats what it is like for them when they get out.
I have rambled on enough here I believe.
PM me anytime!!
I am praying for you and your fiance!!! I hope everything turns out the best. xoxo
Nope.I love reading longer post.and i used to not write much here,so now i love writing mi own longer post at times too or responses ... LOL hi there again chica.
Yes....I am spending more time online researching on bipolar and manic depressive,other things, disorder(s)in men and especially who did time in the prison so long.
-Oh.and chica, si.(yes)with mi fiancee/bff it's a med issue too.(He was diagnose with alot of things, and bipolar is at the top of the list,however i know now it is a real fear too.He is"once again quite jovial, on "cloud 9 he said."He is again switchin/changing up,and the prison dr.,was saying how he is "going up and down,mood swings for years." But yep. The "fear"is definitely real. He is so used to getting out of jail.prison and going to sell drugs/rob/hold up a bank or store (SMH)CHILL,UNTIL CAUGHT.Now,he really want to change,and says,"I am so ready to change each day,you will see Sweetness."He has not altered on how "we feel."HECK,he wanna put our pix here on PTO LMFAO(he keep saying that)2 show how happy we are in the "real world."ha ha. I told him calm down cutie,lol Maybe.He is again really happy again."--

I am learning this more now about the "more they are closer to the home date,after a long time in prison, they get yes, "more frighten/scared." I am learning and understanding more also about his "medical issues too.It took him a very long time to open up,admit that and show me papers from his teen juvenile stints,experts diagnose him as that,and other things,so yes.I guess this play a part too.I am trying to sustain,and i am still thrilled he is coming home/i am picking him up.He is seemingly "happy/non-scared again,past few days,i have not been here,as we were talking much more as i been also talking to his counselor."I will yes continue to be right there for him.Thank you,so much everyone at the PTO. and JEN si...yes chica, i am doing that. .I been thank for great advice here with many and now i NEED it, didn't think i would too much,9 or 8 weeks prior to driving to get him. But i am glad i ask this and openly shared what he is going through. I know that he said also,"The real world is way too perfect,Sweetness." I'm always telling him. Nope.You're going to see it is far from it."However, i seem to make him feel "re-assured"he saying when i tell him this,and "remind him"we will be OK.
-
I am not expecting him to get out, go to 1/2 way house then start paying bills/doing it all ya know."(Even though he still offer to take any job)and hopefully the 1/2 way house will be helping him,or so they say get a job,et.al., but i know from my bro doing time that it take time,even at a 1/2 way house for some and especially with medical instability et.al., he might need to get on meds. i don't know/and or SSI his counselor did say this to me earlier.

-"I tell him, I am going to have him take it "day by day" and enjoy our days -n- nights, holding each other,through it all,and when he feel he is really "ready"to go into the "real world?"(Meaning work and all that needed stuff,to gain some independence for himself,then i will support it.but NO RUSH.)He smiled and he really need re-assurance from me it seem more now,and i am giving him that. I just never heard him say,"I'm frighten to leave prison/i m "not ready"then he switch back on "next call"after that sounding "happy again"re-assured,and ready to get out.Definitely his medical diagnosis the counselor saying too playing a part in it ya know."He is SO physically beautiful.but do NOT believe he is,from bad childhood,really bad. and he is more beautiful in his heart,and clearly just want to be held and loved he said,and care for,and did become a christian so he remind me of this,and i tell him, i WILL not let you down/going to be right here with him.and he said, "Please go to therapy with me."You been my medication for years,and now we can both go,so i can see if i need meds,and i told him, i will take him to begin with yes therapy."
-
-
He truly is a wonderful young man,who was dealt a really bad raw beginning in life.I've already shared some here about his own mom sharing drugs with him since pre-teen.just a mess and he deserve better,and he know that,and he do believe this is why GOD sent me him for long time now.We are truly both happy he is coming home.I just never heard him say "I'm not ready to get out"and i am frighten/scared to death,Sweetness.So that made me a lil nervous,for him but not for our beautiful journey.

-
I look forward(still)to updating you all when he is out this November.
I pray to GOD he will be ok.He "offer"to be put on meds, saying, "You been mi only medication in life,for almost 30 years.No 1 ever help him,get better or no 1 ever really care for him,or how he sound/act,how he was ruining his life since pre-teen 12,til' me. I told him, "Just by him saying this prove alot to me."We will take it day by day,that is all we can do and let GOD lead the way... Good night,jenny and every body thank you. Thanks again PTO."adios. hugs n blessings.Thank you for caring enough to answer this most relevant thread.
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True/Real love wins each time. Lead with you MIND.(not your heart.)
-
-Halfway house til' Interstate C.is approved.
Pero, we will still have our cold winter nights each weekend.
#snuggling each wknd,til home.
-



Last edited by a.rare.love; 09-11-2017 at 10:22 PM..
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Old 09-12-2017, 05:26 AM
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Some of them have grandiose ideas upon release and then when "life" happens, shit hits the fan.
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Old 09-12-2017, 04:46 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Texasflower08 View Post
Mine gets released in 2 months. I will pray for you.
That is a sweet, y' chica, gracia.(thank you) Texas. I am happy your loved one, like mine es si.(is yes) almost out of the prison DOC, that is, (well except mine on probation 1 or lil longer.)I am happy, just he never said that before,so i open up here 1st time on it scare me to hear him sound well "not really suicidal" well not really, however, pero(but)just so severely deeply intensely sad,miserable 1st time with me,and so deeply depressed,now i am learning here and on net, research this is a prevalent thing amongst "many inmates about to get released."He fall into the category of them. So now he is "again jovial happier than i've ever heard him(his mood swings again are 100% smiling happy,saying happy things,and "trying to he said to remain strong like i am in life so, we BOTH going to get through it "together" even IF he has to stay in the bad area the half-way program only a short time,while we put in for the transfer once he is there,with the nice lady counselor,so we will get through this either way,God-willing, as a team ya know.We will. God-willing. 8 weeks to go now."Hugs -n- Blessings to you all.
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True/Real love wins each time. Lead with you MIND.(not your heart.)
-
-Halfway house til' Interstate C.is approved.
Pero, we will still have our cold winter nights each weekend.
#snuggling each wknd,til home.
-



Last edited by a.rare.love; 09-12-2017 at 04:48 PM..
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Old 09-12-2017, 04:52 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Texasflower08 View Post
Mine gets released in 2 months. I will pray for you.
Quote:
Originally Posted by yourself View Post
The ones I worry about most are the ones who have no fear of release. Many of those guys have no intentions of changing the behavior that got them in prison in the first place.

I neer looked at it that way, chica, (Thanks!) Yourself.I never looked at it this way. Interesting.i ask my bro other night,and he say, "he nervous as f---k sis lol"smh(he curse alot)but he said something similar to your post yourself,so we will be alright."I feel confident about it,and i am keeping mi fiancee/bff feeling the same, for years."Just the first time he admit,he is literally frighten to his counselor,and i,and now he is back to his old self.(While trying his hardest to avoid "drugs/weed being offered to him his last sixty days in prison!)So far he is avoiding it.and i keep reminding him to stay focus,and strong,and think positive,i sure am.Got a beautiful condo and home he is coming home to,after halfway house and weekends away from 1/2 WAY HOUSE...A loving God-loving "positive-strengthening home"with nothing but happiness await him.The nest is built,been built a while and he smile each time we talk about such house,i am openly welcoming him to."He is so happy again,and i love hearing him this way, more stronger/positive."
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True/Real love wins each time. Lead with you MIND.(not your heart.)
-
-Halfway house til' Interstate C.is approved.
Pero, we will still have our cold winter nights each weekend.
#snuggling each wknd,til home.
-


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Old 09-12-2017, 04:55 PM
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Quote:
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Some of them have grandiose ideas upon release and then when "life" happens, shit hits the fan.


Oh i know.
and i recall chica, when i was here @ PTO, i started a thread to see if other men or women here, experience a narcissist trait(grandiose fantasies/big time dream star struck stuff thinkin the real world is so "easy" ya know.)and now? he is no longer "soundin this way."He admit, It was some of what he was going thru in his head,thinking life was that"perfect"in late 20s out here,and i am glad he is finally seeing it is not like that.But with PRAYER/GOD's work,and me, and a good positive strong mindset,he will be ok. i am keeping the faith,and glad when he is just OUT of prison,ya know. Thanks for your post ...
hugs -n-blessing Just Being Me.
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True/Real love wins each time. Lead with you MIND.(not your heart.)
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-Halfway house til' Interstate C.is approved.
Pero, we will still have our cold winter nights each weekend.
#snuggling each wknd,til home.
-


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Old 10-05-2017, 08:44 PM
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I will NOT abandoned him.I Will help him ANY way i possibly can.Our vows said better or worse til death do we part. He has my heart and SOUL.He is my EVERYTHING.
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Old 10-06-2017, 09:14 AM
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Mine wasterrfied when he realized he was going to have to go to a halfway house full of people he'd been locked up with. A week before he got out, one of his associates inside found out they were paroling to the same place and told him he'd have drugs waiting for him in the parking lot after they met with their POs. Even better, he informed him that his dealer works at the halfway house and could keep him adequately supplied. When my LO declined he was told "ill get you to change your mind. Don't worry."

He went from confident to petrified in that one conversation. But I don't see it as a bad thing as long as it doesn't turn into a negative, self-defeating attitude. The reality is it probably WILL be really hard. Things won't go perfectly as planned and there will be bumps in the road.
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