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Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison For everyone who has a husband, boyfriend or male partner incarcerated.

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  #1  
Old 11-30-2006, 12:00 AM
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Exclamation DRAMA~EX Girlfriend On The Prawl~DRAMA

I have tears in my eyes and I am in desperate need of HELP!

Well heres the story.My fiancee and I have been together a little while and we have developed this honesty system that has worked so far.Lately he informed me that his ex has sent a message via friend that she wants to come visit him.This girl and I have had previous confrontations and have each others numbers,so we used to talk frequently. Now after about 5 months she wants to resurface.I'm nervous as hell and I told him to go ahead and see her(b/c I trust him)I know she wants him back.I tried contacting her and "her friend" but they both have changed their numbers.

I feel like he's leaving parts of the story out b/c why would a person pop up after so long...Unless he contacted her first or there is a middle man somewhere.I'm about 2.3 seconds from loosing my mind.I want to be snoopy and investigate behind his back but it would violate the trust.How do I handle the situation? PLEASE HELLLLLLPPPPPPPP!
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Old 11-30-2006, 12:07 AM
mylala62 mylala62 is offline
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I'm sorry to say this to you, but if he's hiding some parts, you can't trust him! But I think you did the right thing by giving the go ahead on her visiting him, it shows him that you do trust him and that you aren't trippin'! Don't panic yet girl, just kick back and see what happens!!! Good Luck!!
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Old 11-30-2006, 12:13 AM
Wobabi Wobabi is offline
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Default Be Cool

Smiley,,,Dont panic,,Be confident that if he wants you,,He will want you no matter how many Ex's come to visit and if He doesnt then You can cut your losses,,,there IS more where He came from. Let time tell all.
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Old 11-30-2006, 01:07 AM
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ilovecharles ilovecharles is offline
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Default Similiar but different

Hey~
I had a situation like this also just happen! my fiances ex told his sister that she wanted to visit/write him. i was SO uncomfortable with this scenario due to my own insecurities and past relationship experiences...i talked to my guy about it and he assured me that he didnt want anything from her and that if she could accept and respect us as a unit then she could possibly build a friendship with us.
maybe you could propose that as an idea to him. im sure the idea of you sitting down with an ex for several hours just chatting it up wouldnt be appealing to him either. just remember to keep your cool and do what you do. Exes are Exes for a reason! and that you guys are engaged so obviously there is something about YOU that makes him love YOU. ya know what im saying?
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Old 11-30-2006, 01:15 AM
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Default drama ex girlfriend on the prawl

Girl,I totally know how you're feeling right now,cause one of my boyfriends exes has tried a few times now to get back with him. The last incident was only a few weeks ago. My boyfriend and I are real honest and upfront about this kinda shit just like you and your man. I don't know if this would be appropriate in your relationship,but for me personally I insisted that he cut all ties with her!!!! He can't stand her in the first place so he has no problem with me feeling the way I do. Even before him and I got serious he used to talk mad shit about her,so I know he's not lying about his feelings for her. Anyhow,if you and your man are planning on getting married then I would just put my foot down if I were you. I would flat out tell him that you're not cool with her being involved with him,you,or your relationship. If he has nothing for her,and he truely loves you and respects you as the woman he is supposedely gonna spend his life with then he should understand your feelings,and set her ass straight.Just tell him how you feel. Calm down,and stay strong girl!!! The fact that he told you about this says alot in my opinion,so don't freak yourself out too bad! If he was gonna be shady he would've kept it a secret. Take care!
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Old 11-30-2006, 12:14 PM
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Sounds Odd, thats for shure. i can say that, but i somewhat no how you feel, b/c my hubby has a vendictive x, i cannot stand her, but she dosent do all that, but if she did, oh yeah we'd have problems, believe me, i think the trust circle breaks the minute "your man seen her" b/c visit to me is time to hold and comfort your man, so why is she there? with him?? oh no, girl put your foot down, b.c thats unfair, to you by all means, tell him ,you dont agree to these visits, and let him no, this is not for you, and you dont need this, you on the outside, just member that!!! keep you head up!
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Old 11-30-2006, 12:31 PM
HisDimples HisDimples is offline
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Well, I would not say that it was cool for her to go ahead and visit when you are obviously not comfortable with it. To not just speak your mind is manipulative. If you aren't comfortable with it, then you aren't comfortable with it and there's nothing wrong with that. If you don't feel comfortable with it, then be honest. Being honest is the biggest part of being trustworthy. So, instead of worrying about him being trustworthy, how trustworthy are you being?
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Old 12-01-2006, 05:47 AM
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I think you have to trust your man....

I think a LOT of inmates are contacted by their X's especially when they know a new woman is in the picture, not to mention you being his fiance. We both know the reason she wants to go visit him is to tempt him... and try to get back with him.

My man is the type who stays friends with his X's. One of them is so jealous of me it makes me laugh.... in fact the stuff she is trying only makes me feel more confident that I got him for real.... and he is honest and tells me all about it, which I respect. He remembers the drama, her lying and cheating and doesn't want to go back there again.... She wants to visit he says NO..... she was making his 3 ways calls but she wont do them to me.......so he found somebody else to make his calls.... he told me he can actually see right through her now.... and is surprised he never saw all this game before.

You have to trust in your realationship........if it was meant to be it will.
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