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GPT Phones, Mail, and Visitation Discussions Please post topics or discussions here that do not fit in the appropriate state or federal forums.

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  #1  
Old 12-08-2019, 01:45 PM
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Default Visitation hiccups or gas

Interesting weekend to say the least. Things have been going great this past week and because of our holiday schedule at work, I ended up having a shorter work week. I managed to be able to get some time for myself yesterday and planned to go visit my love. This was my second time going to this place and the travel is longer so I had to leave first thing in the morning.

Everything went well. I didn't get lost like I did the last time I went there, and despite arriving an hour after visitation had begun, the line was short and moving along. That's when it stopped being so great for me. I'd worn hoodies to visitation before but never here. This place is notorious for interpreting the rules their way. Long story short, the CO told me my hoodie was considered a jacket and my shirt underneath was indecent (a ladies undershirt). I didn't know what to say, so I gathered myself and left. The other CO looked conflicted by her coworker's explanation of the dress code because clearly I was wearing the hoodie as a top, not a jacket but I think she didn't want to ruffle feathers so she handed me back my things without questioning her. The CO who denied my visit was trying to have small talk after she told me I couldn't see him, but I'd already turned her voice into Charlie Brown adult tone after telling her no other prison I'd visited interpreted the dress code like that. I could have asked to speak to the admin on duty but I wasn't thinking. I just wanted to leave.

I always say, if these men and women walked our paths, many would have a different heart. There are good COs but those like the ones at this particular prison reach beyond explanation. It's as if they wait for the moment to feel powerful because you're at their will.

Sadly I don't know when I'll have the time off to see my love again and the smile in his voice when he called earlier in the week and I shared with him that everything had worked out for me to come, made that drive back without seeing him harder.

He's due for another transfer soon and after yesterday morning, I look forward to him leaving there. The lockdown and chaos is just too much to push through any longer.
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Old 12-08-2019, 03:58 PM
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Ok... from the title I legit thought this was going to be about you ripping a smelly one during visit so I was confused. Sorry you had a disappointment.
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Old 12-08-2019, 04:58 PM
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Sorry to hear about your visit.

As a CO I always give this advice. Carry a change of clothes in the car if possible. You never know who you are going to have in the front lobby.

You should also request to speak to a supervisor, let them make the call. I will tell you though, in my prison we don't allow hoodies in the visiting room. We allow jackets, but really its because there is no where to store them outside of the visiting room.

Well good luck next time.
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Old 12-08-2019, 10:26 PM
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Aww, man. That stinks. I've had the same shirt I've worn for three years turned away. When I asked to speak to the visiting sergeant things went from bad to unbelievably ridiculous. Thankfully I had a bag of clothes to be donated in my car and grabbed an old shirt to wear. I've wasted gas and had hiccups, too. I'm glad to hear he'll be moved soon. ❤❤
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Old 12-09-2019, 12:34 AM
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I'm sorry for your disappointing visitation but honestly the visitors dress code should be standard across all prisons in all counties.
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Old 12-09-2019, 03:47 AM
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Sorry to hear about your visit.

As a CO I always give this advice. Carry a change of clothes in the car if possible. You never know who you are going to have in the front lobby.

You should also request to speak to a supervisor, let them make the call. I will tell you though, in my prison we don't allow hoodies in the visiting room. We allow jackets, but really its because there is no where to store them outside of the visiting room.

Well good luck next time.
I concur. I have a small suitcase and have even given away three black tee shirts to ladies who had dress code issues. You just never know.
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Old 12-09-2019, 10:17 AM
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At SQ when hub was in reception, I wore the wrong bra. lol. It had undewires in it, and I'd thought they were plastic, not metal.
So I had to go up to a Friends Outside shack and borrow one.
Super embarrassing.
And actually pretty stupid. Visits in reception are behind glass. No way to get him an underwire to use as a weapon.
(tho I wouldnt have passed the metal detector I suppose)
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Old 12-09-2019, 10:52 AM
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Originally Posted by Bikerguy View Post
Sorry to hear about your visit.

As a CO I always give this advice. Carry a change of clothes in the car if possible. You never know who you are going to have in the front lobby.

You should also request to speak to a supervisor, let them make the call. I will tell you though, in my prison we don't allow hoodies in the visiting room. We allow jackets, but really its because there is no where to store them outside of the visiting room.

Well good luck next time.
That's the problem with South Carolina prisons Bikerguy, you're not allowed to leave and change clothes. Your visit is cancelled for the day and many of us travel at least 100 miles from home to see our loved ones and going back to visitation the next day isn't always an option.

Hoodies aren't a problem here. Because the rooms are far from being comfortable whether its warm or cold, you dress for comfort because of being unable to change or remove clothing to avoid being accused of misconduct.
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Old 12-09-2019, 10:58 AM
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I'm sorry for your disappointing visitation but honestly the visitors dress code should be standard across all prisons in all counties.
The rules are standard, it's interpretation of the rules that are conflicting. I've visited nearly all of the prisons here. I was surprised one allowed sundresses and sandals and others I've been to require you wear closed in shoes. That's the problem and it's going to take people notifying headquarters of what's taking place.

In the moment you're not thinking of asking for a supervisor after you've been standing outside in the elements and just want to get inside and get comfortable, especially if you've been waiting for an hour or so.

A lesson I've learned after enduring this process for years, but again I cannot have that day back nor the money spent for visitation arrangements (food and pictures) for a while.

Because of their modified lockdown, I'm not sure when I'll hear from my love to find out what they told him because again, this place is notorious for making their own rules unless you go above their heads. I'm still disappointed but it's not going to change what's already taken place.
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Old 12-10-2019, 06:46 PM
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My first visit is in three weeks and I'm nervous about what I wear. I bought a bra that doesn't have underwire, but I HATE it. So I'm gonna take a strapless bra and take the underwire out of that and use my clear plastic straps for it to keep my twins up. Luckily I've got some pants and a sweatshirt/long sleeve shirt I can wear. His sister is also bringing me some clothes she's getting rid of. I'm gonna have her pick out my outfit so I make sure I'm dressed appropriately. It's also my choice of shoes that I worry about. I mainly wear flip flops and my Chuck Taylors. But I can't for the visits. So all that's left is my heeled boots and my Vans.
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Old 12-10-2019, 07:37 PM
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My first visit is in three weeks and I'm nervous about what I wear. I bought a bra that doesn't have underwire, but I HATE it. So I'm gonna take a strapless bra and take the underwire out of that and use my clear plastic straps for it to keep my twins up. Luckily I've got some pants and a sweatshirt/long sleeve shirt I can wear. His sister is also bringing me some clothes she's getting rid of. I'm gonna have her pick out my outfit so I make sure I'm dressed appropriately. It's also my choice of shoes that I worry about. I mainly wear flip flops and my Chuck Taylors. But I can't for the visits. So all that's left is my heeled boots and my Vans.
You can wear an underwire! Dress like you’re meeting his grandma for the first time and you’ll be fine. No white... ever. Chucks are fine!
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Old 12-10-2019, 08:42 PM
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If the underwire is metal you could and probably will have trouble getting past the metal detector.
Not sure about the shoes but heck, I'd just wear the Vans. Just in case.
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Old 12-10-2019, 11:28 PM
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Yeah it's metal underwire. So I'm just taking it all out. And my Chucks are white with pink polka dots, my Vans are the black and white checkered classic ones.
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Old 12-11-2019, 02:47 PM
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That's the problem with South Carolina prisons Bikerguy, you're not allowed to leave and change clothes. Your visit is cancelled for the day and many of us travel at least 100 miles from home to see our loved ones and going back to visitation the next day isn't always an option.

Hoodies aren't a problem here. Because the rooms are far from being comfortable whether its warm or cold, you dress for comfort because of being unable to change or remove clothing to avoid being accused of misconduct.
Sorry to hear that they do not allow you to change clothes.

We allow folks to leave and comeback with something else. We even direct people to the closest Walmart if they need to buy something else. It keeps the complaints to a minimum especially if people travel from far away.
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Old 12-11-2019, 06:16 PM
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My husband's in federal and I read the visitation rules and attire probably 12 times before I left the house to make sure I was good. It specifically says no hoodies so I knew that part. I think it also mentioned the underwire thing. The latter got several people when I was there and they had to go to Walmart to buy new ones.

I didn't care how "shabby" I looked,... my goal was to get through the line. On my second day there I was floored. There was a woman with I swear 4 inch stiletto heels!!! I was convinced there was NO way she'd get in... I mean hell that is more of a weapon than an underwire!! Yes it would have been more obvious but a "weapon" is a "weapon" imo.
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Old 12-12-2019, 05:43 AM
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Regardless of the visiting rules, what you experience when checking into visitation depends on the actual COs who are in charge at that moment.
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Old 12-12-2019, 08:32 AM
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Regardless of the visiting rules, what you experience when checking into visitation depends on the actual COs who are in charge at that moment.
This has become the truest factor I've learned over the last ten plus years.
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Old 12-12-2019, 08:48 AM
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Even within the states guidelines each prison could have different *rules*
Its pretty frustrating. I know several people who wear the same exact thing everytime they visit, and was sent to change one time.
In SQ you cannot wear a jacket, or any layers.
at CCI coats were allowed.
So it really IS up to the staff when you go visit. All you can do is try to find something they allow in.


As to going all the way to visit and NOT letting you go change into permitted clothing? Bull crap. You would still have to go thru the metal detectors assuming.
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Old 12-12-2019, 09:14 AM
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Even within the states guidelines each prison could have different *rules*
Its pretty frustrating. I know several people who wear the same exact thing everytime they visit, and was sent to change one time.
In SQ you cannot wear a jacket, or any layers.
at CCI coats were allowed.
So it really IS up to the staff when you go visit. All you can do is try to find something they allow in.


As to going all the way to visit and NOT letting you go change into permitted clothing? Bull crap. You would still have to go thru the metal detectors assuming.
Correct! At this prison, they have updated equipment so you have to endure the ride on the ion scanner.

My love didn't find out why I wasn't allowed to visit until Tuesday. The old him would have raised so much hell, but we both had the same attitude. Karma will serve it's due.

I truly wish they did have leeway where they allowed us to change here, but it could be another 20 years before that policy is considered an option.
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Old 12-14-2019, 08:10 PM
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If the underwire is metal you could and probably will have trouble getting past the metal detector.
Not sure about the shoes but heck, I'd just wear the Vans. Just in case.
Here the metal clasps or clips will set the metal detector off even if there is no underwire. I bought a tree dried and true sports bra. Smashes you down, but there are no issues.

Here they allow you to remove your bra in a bathroom and go through then put it back on. Humiliating, but you have other options.
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Old 12-15-2019, 02:55 AM
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Here the metal clasps or clips will set the metal detector off even if there is no underwire. I bought a tree dried and true sports bra. Smashes you down, but there are no issues.

Here they allow you to remove your bra in a bathroom and go through then put it back on. Humiliating, but you have other options.
Oh shoot. I didn't even think about the clasp in the back. Damn. Guess it'll be a sports bra. My twins aren't comfortable in those. Oh well.

His mom gave me a huge list of visiting rules and stuff. Told her what shoes I have and she was like those will be fine (my black and white checkered Vans)
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Old 12-25-2019, 12:38 PM
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Default Second times a charm

I wasn't sure if I'd be able to travel 2+ hours after working a 12 hour shift, but I figured if I'm not able to see him for the rest of the year, it's worth a try!

I arrived in the town about a half hour after visitation began, assuming I was late! Nope, there's a line and I'm not upset at that beautiful sight because visitation is a gift to our families all year long, but especially during these six weeks of the year.

This time, I wore a new long sleeved t-shirt and a light jacket. The same CO was there, but she wasn't managing the check-in, she had a different role during the process. There were 3 of them all together. Later during the visit I found out from my love, that officer that denied the visit the last time was one of the contraband officers when she came into the visitation area and he pointed her out.

We had a wonderful two hour visit

Holiday visitation here is 3 hours, but they don't begin letting in visitors until the time begins...example it's from 1-4, they don't start the check-in process until 1:00. I wasn't seated until after an hour when visitation began, and at 15 minutes before it was to end, they announced for our men to remain seated because visitation was over.

We said our good-byes with smiles and he immediately asked when I was coming back and I don't know.

My recent schedule for work was so disappointing. One of the perks of me being the one the longest employed on my shift, I'm no longer required to work weekends. I'd decided to try and work as many shifts Monday-Thursday and a few Sundays to help with the short staff issues. Well one of the new hires (she hasn't been there a year), went to management and demanded certain days of the week or she'll quit! So the schedule I requested (we do self-scheduling) was denied and it may be 2-3 months before I can make arrangements to see him again because of that.

I'm working New Year's Day, so I won't be able to visit him because it's my required holiday to work.

I don't dwell on my coworkers not understanding that everyone's family life isn't the same as theirs. I've had to adapt to a new staff and it's miserable but I'm a few years from 20 and preparing for retiring in my patient way.

I'm just so grateful everything went well, yet I hope I do not have to have another 28 hour day to be able to spend time with him
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Old 12-25-2019, 11:03 PM
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I'm so glad you were able to visit. 🎄
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