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Raising Children with Parents in Prison For the Parent left behind with children AND for the Children that have a parent inside. Discussion of unique challenges facing this group!

View Poll Results: Was ur babys daddy locked up when his baby was born?
yes 141 76.22%
no 25 13.51%
shortly after the birth 19 10.27%
Voters: 185. You may not vote on this poll

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  #51  
Old 07-02-2009, 12:25 AM
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My sons father was out but he was up to his crapola, I got a text from him the night before I went in to labor that he was out drinking. When I went into labor I chose to call my mom instead. I waited until after the baby was born and I was rested to call him. He came to the hospital and was well behaved. He stayed there with me for 2 days, bonded with the baby, it was great. I know he was upset I did not call him ahead of time, but I needed to take care of myself and the baby. I was sad he was not there, even though it was by my choice.
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  #52  
Old 07-05-2009, 08:27 PM
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Unhappy locked up 3wks for son was born, and he's still there

My husband went 3wks before my son was born in june 03, I kept telling him I had a feeling he was about to go to jail if he didn't stay home, I got a call after I came from my doctor's appt, which he was suppose to be with me and he was in jail and he's been there since that day, I Panicked when i first got the news and ended up in the hospital in the icu and died for a few mintues and ended up going into labor early from the stress, We have to kids 10 and 5 he'll be home next year, it's gonna be kinds weird because i son only knows daddy from the prison
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  #53  
Old 07-22-2009, 04:04 PM
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I'm 6 months pregnant my man will b locked up until sometime around May r son's due @ the beginning of Novemeber
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  #54  
Old 09-30-2009, 07:04 AM
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I had just found out I was pregnant with our second daughter. I had her on July 13 and tried to stay positive for everyone. I always figured others would have gone through the same thing but it is nice to see other woman there are and were in the same shoes as we were. Makes you feel not so alone. Richard has yet to be able to hold our new daughter. He has only seen her through glass. He hasn't held our 18 month old since she was 7 months...he will finally being going DOC soon so we can have contact visits...I CANT WAIT...it has will be a year since we touched in November
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  #55  
Old 10-11-2009, 08:49 AM
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just wondering if anyone knows if inmates in indiana are allowed to be escorted to the births of their children like they are allowed to for funerals?
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  #56  
Old 10-14-2009, 11:31 PM
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Default Suffering!!!!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by special_24 View Post
Was just curious as to how many women have had to go through childbirth without their baby daddys? I did and it was and very stressful. I am sure that there are more than just me to share this experience . What did he think or how did he feel?

well as we speak I'm pregnant and my labor is gonna be induce
on Nov. 8th and it hurts me so much because I'm gonna do it all alone,
but what hurts me more is that he was transferd on the 29th of Sep. from Los Angeles twin towers and has not tryed to contact me at all in any kind of way and i feel very deepress, and im stating to think that he dont care about me or his child, i dont know what to do to get his attention so he can remember that we are out here waitting for him!! and he is only like 2 hours away from me (wasco)
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  #57  
Old 11-05-2009, 07:04 PM
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I was 6 months pregnant at the time. SWAT team came and took him from our home, which was really stressful for us all. It was horrible.

The day she was born, by induction (high blood pressure), I was on the phone with him and the hospital let me talk to him until the phones turned off on his end, before they started.

The next morning, when he heard his little angel cry for the first time, he broke down completely. It's been the hardest thing our relationship has ever had to go through.

She's turning one next week, and he won't be home until Feb 1st 2011.

Its been one heck of a journey.
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  #58  
Old 11-07-2009, 08:21 PM
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Daddy got locked up dec 08 had our 1st child july09 he wont be comming home 4 a few years!
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  #59  
Old 11-07-2009, 09:14 PM
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my son was born and actually 1 week old when my hubby was arrested its hard fr me cause my son doesnt recognize him as daddy i tell him who he is and talk abot him and show him pics but hes still a little stand offish he 3 now and when i sk wheres daddy he say on the picture or at his house lol we also have 3 other boys 8 7 and 5 nd they know their dad but its still hard
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  #60  
Old 11-13-2009, 10:09 PM
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I am currently 9 months pregnant (8 More Days till my due date!!) and my hubby got locked up while I was 5 months pregnant At first it was very stressful for the both of us because it is our first child and he wanted to be out with us more than anything. When we would talk on the phone, I would put him on speaker and hold the phone on my belly and let him talk to our son while he was in the belly and sometimes he would break down saying he was sorry and that "daddy will make it up to you" which got me all emotional! We're taking it day by day now..trying to stay strong and keep my head up since I need to be strong for my son but there are days that I have an emotional breakdown. My husband can't wait till I bring him to visit and I can't wait till we're one big happy family!
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  #61  
Old 11-13-2009, 10:10 PM
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I was 4 months pregnant and in the hospital for gestational diabetes when he got locked up May 8, 2008. I had to go through the rest of a very difficult and high risk pregnancy alone, between the insulin and blood thinner I was having to give myself 6 shots a day. I was hospitalized again in August and had a c-section in October with major complications. I had to have my incision reopened 5 days after the baby was born and then it took 2-3 months for it to heal from the inside out. When I got out of the hospital I had my seven year old and a newborn to take care of with no help at all and my incision still open. It was hell. The baby just turned one and thank God he will be home in 10 more days and I'm taking a break and letting him handle it all. I'm tired.
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  #62  
Old 11-14-2009, 01:24 AM
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I was 5 weeks pregnant when he became incarcerated in March 2008. Now I'm 2 weeks away from our daughter's first birthday and he still isn't home. No fair!!! Won't be here this Christmas or New Year's again either. And he has the nerve to ask me to have another baby!!! Huh!!!
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  #63  
Old 12-21-2009, 04:13 PM
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well i got pregnant the week after he came home on parole in dec 2008 he was home for 90 days then got locked back up... i had to do it by myself and i was high risk n put on bed rest and had a 3 year old to take care of as well. our baby was born 09/09/09 n he missed it he still has 4 1/2 year left on his sentence!!
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  #64  
Old 12-21-2009, 04:33 PM
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He was released from the halfway house the day I went into labor. He had just finished moving all his things into the new apartment and was sitting down with me to relax & watch a movie when my water broke. I guess our baby was just waiting for the perfect moment. lol.
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  #65  
Old 01-05-2010, 06:54 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mandy0408 View Post
He was released from the halfway house the day I went into labor. He had just finished moving all his things into the new apartment and was sitting down with me to relax & watch a movie when my water broke. I guess our baby was just waiting for the perfect moment. lol.

Wow thats crrazy!!

And yes i gave birth to my lil princess while he was in =(** shes now 3 and hes still locked up...luckily for my lil girl he'll be out in a few months
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  #66  
Old 01-06-2010, 01:35 AM
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My boyfriend got arrested when I was 6 months pregnant. It was for the best. He had a serious drug problem and caused too much stress to me while I was pregnant (ended up in the hospital a few times during my pregnancy). It also saved his life. He didnt get to see his first baby girl get born and it seemed to be an eye opener for him. Seems to have changed him for the better. And I hope he makes some big changes when he gets out because she deserves a good father.
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  #67  
Old 01-06-2010, 01:41 AM
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YUPZ ii WAS 6 MONtHZ PREGNANt WEN MY MAN GOt LOCkEd UP ON MAY 9 TH 2009... HE WASNt PHYSiiCALLY tHERE bt HE WAS REALLY SUPPORtiiVE AND WOULd ALWAYS tELL ME tO bE StRONG! MY WAtER bROkE AUG.7 tH AND ii GAVE biiRtH TO MY BEAUtiifULL bAbY GiiRL ON SAtURdAY, AUG. 8 tH 2009.... MY bAbY iiZ NOW 5 MONtHZ AND HE Hasn't bEEN ABlE tO HOLD HER At LEASt ONCE.. I HOPE dAt dA NEXt tiiME ii GEt tO ViiSiit EM iiN PRiiSON HE GEtZ tO HOLD HER.... HE StiiLL HAS 13 MONtHZ LEft tO SERVE BEfORE HE COMES HOME...
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  #68  
Old 01-06-2010, 09:38 AM
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No, thank goodness..... he was locked up and sent to prison 2 weeks before our daughters 1st Birthday!!!!!! Which was very tough but I'm so thankfull he was home for her birth, he also has missed her 2nd Birthday but thankfully he will be home for her 3rd.......
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  #69  
Old 01-06-2010, 07:39 PM
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FOund out i was pregnant while he was on the run... Begged him to turn himself in WHICH HE REFUSED to do! ended up missing my daughter birth by less than a month FUCKER! and i guess that was harbinger of things to come.. cuz he is no longer in my daughters life!
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  #70  
Old 01-06-2010, 08:41 PM
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I was 7 weeks pregnant when he went in and had to do it all by myself.I still believe that if we had known that he would've slowed his role and would still be here now.
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  #71  
Old 01-12-2010, 01:21 AM
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He went to court monday, was locked up.

I gave birth wednesday the same week.

We have a friend whose incarceration was delayed so he could finish his school program.

oh well....its done.
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  #72  
Old 01-20-2010, 11:58 AM
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yes and it sucks :-(
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  #73  
Old 02-08-2010, 08:03 AM
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My fiance is getting locked up today....im schedueled to be induced tomorrow morning at 6:30am, bright and early. Crazy timing huh? This will be my first child, and im just really scared. I know its supposed to be a beautiful, happy time.But will i be happy? of course becuase ill finally meet my daughter and start a life with her. Would i give anything for him to be there? yes. Mixed emotions everywhere.
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  #74  
Old 03-31-2010, 09:52 PM
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I haven't given birth yet, but when I do I will be doing it without my huband. Right now it doesn't bother me that much but I think its cause I have so many friends/family supporting me. I am sure once the day arrives, ill be extremely happy and sad all in one...very emotional I am sure.
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  #75  
Old 04-14-2010, 10:52 AM
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Two of my children were born while Dada was on a parole violation. It was the hardest time of my life. Especially the second birth, having two little ones so close in age. I just took lots of photos and sent him a congratulations it's a girl card. The second one was a long letter because I was supposed to have a boy but had a girl instead, so he felt like he was there when I wrote everything down. I took photos of everything, all my visitors, cards, balloons, flowers, gifts, baby shower stuff.. although he thought the baby shower was weird, but he was happy I got so many nice things. I tried to include him in as much as possible. Of course it couldn't replace him not being there.
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