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Loving a Long-term Sentenced Offender For those whose loved one is serving 10+ years.

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  #1  
Old 02-14-2019, 11:20 AM
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Default So many holidays without him...

If anyone would understand what I am feeling right now, it's all of you who are loving a long-term sentenced offender. Valentine's day is not that major of a holiday...but it's just a reminder of all the holidays that I spent without him. 13 Christmas's, 13 Thanksgivings. 13 Valentine's Days and 13 bdays. Then...he gets out and everything was so great. I had him for 2 years. Yet, here I am again..looking at 8 more years with out him unless his appeal goes through. I was so hurt when he went back in, I didn't have any contact with him for almost a year. He didn't give up though, I must have received 100 letters...begging me to just be his friend if nothing more. I finally broke down and decided to give him a chance with the understanding that if he wins his appeal and ends up going back in I'm done. If he loses his appeal, and get's 8 years, he will have to serve 85% in order to be considered for parole. I told him that I would have to take it one day at a time...I just don't know how many more years I can do, and how many more holidays I can spend without him...sigh
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Old 02-14-2019, 11:54 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JTsBabyGirl View Post
If anyone would understand what I am feeling right now, it's all of you who are loving a long-term sentenced offender. Valentine's day is not that major of a holiday...but it's just a reminder of all the holidays that I spent without him. 13 Christmas's, 13 Thanksgivings. 13 Valentine's Days and 13 bdays. Then...he gets out and everything was so great. I had him for 2 years. Yet, here I am again..looking at 8 more years with out him unless his appeal goes through. I was so hurt when he went back in, I didn't have any contact with him for almost a year. He didn't give up though, I must have received 100 letters...begging me to just be his friend if nothing more. I finally broke down and decided to give him a chance with the understanding that if he wins his appeal and ends up going back in I'm done. If he loses his appeal, and get's 8 years, he will have to serve 85% in order to be considered for parole. I told him that I would have to take it one day at a time...I just don't know how many more years I can do, and how many more holidays I can spend without him...sigh
I'm sorry that your going through that and yes it does take a toll. Kudos to you though for sticking it out as long as you did, just shows how much you love and care about him. I wish I could tell you that everything will be okay and it will get easier but it doesn't. Just keep your head up and stay strong, I pray that he wins the appeal so you get to have him back home with you where he should be !

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Old 02-14-2019, 01:06 PM
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Not much of a holiday person myself but I hear you....Sending you strength and also keeping my fingers crossed for his appeal to be successful
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Old 02-14-2019, 02:12 PM
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I understand what you are saying, you have missed out on so much due to your loved ones poor decision making.

Its really your call what you want to do .I hope his appeal is successful ,if not then do you want to spend 8 more years spending holidays alone.

I hope you can find peace and happiness.
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Old 04-13-2019, 01:29 PM
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Like you said it's one day at a time.
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