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When the Relationship is Over... This forum is about discussing your thoughts, feelings and issues now that you and your incarcerated (or formerly incarcerated) loved one are no longer together. (This forum is NOT for bashing - please read the rules before posting.)

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  #1  
Old 06-09-2017, 06:57 AM
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Default She is Pregnant and I am still alive/5 month update

One of my Ex's friends made it a point to tell me that my ex's new girlfriend is pregnant. I am not sure how to feel about this. He just got out of county jail a few weeks ago. It proves (not that I needed proof) but it proves he was cheating on me (duh) when he said he wasn't. I feel bad for their baby. The ex is not working. She is not working (has no I.D. to even get a real job). I KNOW IT IS NONE OF MY BUSINESS, so no one has to tell me that. I have not contacted him and he has not contacted me. GOOD. I am going to finish my last semester of college and graduate in December. Me and the kids are doing good. I have not cried in a few weeks now. I know I dodged a huge bullet with that narcissistic, lying a$$hole. I know my kids are way better off without him in their lives. Just an update to let those who care know that I am still alive and with this baby on the way, I don't think he will come after me. But I am still keeping my guard up. Thanks for all of the prayers and concerns. I really appreciate them.
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Old 06-09-2017, 10:06 AM
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Originally Posted by Texas EZ Mom View Post
One of my Ex's friends made it a point to tell me that my ex's new girlfriend is pregnant. I am not sure how to feel about this. He just got out of county jail a few weeks ago. It proves (not that I needed proof) but it proves he was cheating on me (duh) when he said he wasn't. I feel bad for their baby. The ex is not working. She is not working (has no I.D. to even get a real job). I KNOW IT IS NONE OF MY BUSINESS, so no one has to tell me that. I have not contacted him and he has not contacted me. GOOD. I am going to finish my last semester of college and graduate in December. Me and the kids are doing good. I have not cried in a few weeks now. I know I dodged a huge bullet with that narcissistic, lying a$$hole. I know my kids are way better off without him in their lives. Just an update to let those who care know that I am still alive and with this baby on the way, I don't think he will come after me. But I am still keeping my guard up. Thanks for all of the prayers and concerns. I really appreciate them.
I would look at it as the much needed closure you need to move forward. I have been following tour posts and I'm glad you are ok. It will take time to heal and I'm sure you have learned a lot. Best wishes to you and your family.
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Old 06-09-2017, 10:21 AM
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Hey Tex,

So happy you are holding strong after the storm.

Proud of you!!

Smile!!! Hugs to You
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Old 06-09-2017, 12:29 PM
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It's good to see that you have not let this latest news set you back. You know there may be other busy bodies that want to give you "news". As long as you stay focused on yourself and your children, you will do just fine.
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Old 06-09-2017, 01:33 PM
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Originally Posted by Texas EZ Mom View Post
One of my Ex's friends made it a point to tell me that my ex's new girlfriend is pregnant. I am not sure how to feel about this. He just got out of county jail a few weeks ago. It proves (not that I needed proof) but it proves he was cheating on me (duh) when he said he wasn't. I feel bad for their baby. The ex is not working. She is not working (has no I.D. to even get a real job). I KNOW IT IS NONE OF MY BUSINESS, so no one has to tell me that. I have not contacted him and he has not contacted me. GOOD. I am going to finish my last semester of college and graduate in December. Me and the kids are doing good. I have not cried in a few weeks now. I know I dodged a huge bullet with that narcissistic, lying a$$hole. I know my kids are way better off without him in their lives. Just an update to let those who care know that I am still alive and with this baby on the way, I don't think he will come after me. But I am still keeping my guard up. Thanks for all of the prayers and concerns. I really appreciate them.
You're doing good and your strength is an inspiration . That scum and his gf deserve each other.
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Old 06-09-2017, 03:29 PM
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Originally Posted by Texas EZ Mom View Post
One of my Ex's friends made it a point to tell me that my ex's new girlfriend is pregnant. I am not sure how to feel about this. He just got out of county jail a few weeks ago. It proves (not that I needed proof) but it proves he was cheating on me (duh) when he said he wasn't. I feel bad for their baby. The ex is not working. She is not working (has no I.D. to even get a real job). I KNOW IT IS NONE OF MY BUSINESS, so no one has to tell me that. I have not contacted him and he has not contacted me. GOOD. I am going to finish my last semester of college and graduate in December. Me and the kids are doing good. I have not cried in a few weeks now. I know I dodged a huge bullet with that narcissistic, lying a$$hole. I know my kids are way better off without him in their lives. Just an update to let those who care know that I am still alive and with this baby on the way, I don't think he will come after me. But I am still keeping my guard up. Thanks for all of the prayers and concerns. I really appreciate them.


Chica I'm happy to see you're doing well even without him. How should you feel about it? .. It's okay if it hurts, I say, he was an important person for you, he was unfaithful while you were together, so it's normal if it stings BUT it's also good if after it stings we just brush it off. See there's a plan in everything. This man, he didn't deserve you and you're 100% correct your children and yourself are better off without him. That baby of yours that's on it's way I hope gives you that much more strength to keep moving forward chica, .. stay positive.

Blessings to you and your little family ❤️
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Old 06-11-2017, 01:04 PM
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Chica I'm happy to see you're doing well even without him. How should you feel about it? .. It's okay if it hurts, I say, he was an important person for you, he was unfaithful while you were together, so it's normal if it stings BUT it's also good if after it stings we just brush it off. See there's a plan in everything. This man, he didn't deserve you and you're 100% correct your children and yourself are better off without him. That baby of yours that's on it's way I hope gives you that much more strength to keep moving forward chica, .. stay positive.

Blessings to you and your little family ❤️
Oh no. You must have read this wrong. I am not pregnant. His Girlfriend is....There is no baby of mine on the way. Thank God. Although I love my kids very much, I do not want any more. lol. I am doing good. I am about to go on a 2 week vacation, much needed. With him, that never would have even been an option. lol. I am taking my kids back to Disney in December, with him, that never would have been an option. Hell, even going somewhere as simple as to dinner, that would never have been an option. (I am sure you can get where I am going with this.) lol. I still have my moments where I hear a certain song or see a certain place, but I don't cry anymore. I pulled my big girl panties on and I am okay. He once said that the young girls always lead him back to prison, and this one will, too. Just a matter of time....
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Old 06-11-2017, 01:06 PM
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I would look at it as the much needed closure you need to move forward. I have been following tour posts and I'm glad you are ok. It will take time to heal and I'm sure you have learned a lot. Best wishes to you and your family.
Thank you. I have learned a lot. I am doing good. Yes, this time, there was closure. There will never be another chance. I am done. But this time, I feel good about it.
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Old 06-11-2017, 01:10 PM
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Hey Tex,

So happy you are holding strong after the storm.

Proud of you!!

Smile!!! Hugs to You
Thank you. I am doing better than I thought I was going to be. I feel pretty good about things. Hell, he gave me a really good jump start on a diet. lol. He showed me just how strong I can be when needed. Thanks for the hugs.
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Old 06-11-2017, 01:13 PM
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It's good to see that you have not let this latest news set you back. You know there may be other busy bodies that want to give you "news". As long as you stay focused on yourself and your children, you will do just fine.
I have not let the latest news set me back. I am just fine. I don't even know if it is true or not (if she is pregnant). His cousin does not think it is true. But I don't even care. I feel sorry for the kid if it is true. But I am staying focused and I will be fine.
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Old 06-11-2017, 01:16 PM
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You're doing good and your strength is an inspiration . That scum and his gf deserve each other.
He did turn out to be exactly not what I thought he was. He put on a good front. Not just to me, but to a lot of people. I feel great. I am going to the beach on a 14 day vacation. He gave me a great jump start on a diet. lol. I am going to have fun with my kids this summer and just sit back and enjoy having him out of my life. Last year I planned our vacation around me visiting him. This year, I can stay gone as long as I want (and can afford). I don't have to send him any money. lol. I am FREE. It now feels like a huge weight was lifted off of me.
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Old 06-17-2017, 08:05 AM
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Thank you for giving us an update. If it were me I would kindly give those around me a warning that I did not care to hear updates about him nor his new relationship...

Now moving forward how will you continue to be successful and never enter a relationship like this again? What steps are you taking to learn about the power and control wheel to better understand warning signs or red flags? How are you going to continue to get your smile back? Your happiness factor? Focus on that
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Old 06-19-2017, 11:36 AM
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I am going to go to counseling and learn self-worth and I know I am worth a lot more than I let him convince me that I am worth. (If that makes any sense).Warning signs, OMG, they were there and I ignored them. I did not want to believe he could be so cruel. I loved this man and it made me feel like what is wrong with ME, that I could love someone so nasty and cruel. I gave him my all and what he did to me, that is not a reflection of who I am, it is a reflection of who HE is. I now know that he is narcissistic and his actions and behaviors will not change. He needs help. I need help because of what he did to me and I need to learn how to love myself more. I will get there. It may take a little time, but I will be fine.
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Old 06-21-2017, 11:00 PM
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Oh no.

but I don't cry anymore. I pulled my big girl panties on


and I am okay. He once said that the young girls always lead him

back to prison, and this one will, too. Just a matter of time...
.

the "young girls?"I assume you're how old chica, over thirty or over forty?either way you're still young yourself, older woman now but young enough to have a great life, so GO and HAVE A GREAT LIFE, as it is way too short not to. Hugs -n- Blessings to you tonight, and "some ex-friends" told you this?I do not get why they would. I sure wouldn't care if my ex loser(s)were having kids with older women younger or adopting or a surrogate. Just wouldn't be MY biz at all. I hope you're really moving on. Let the tears fall as you've done,then realize YES! you're better off without such azzhole narcissistic POS. He shall get his bad dose of karma, sooner than later. Meanwhile, you BLOSSOM/BE HAPPY and live a good God-Blessed life,while he receive eventually his bad dose of Karma.
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Old 06-21-2017, 11:08 PM
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I am going to go to counseling and learn self-worth and I know I am worth a lot more than I let him convince me that I am worth. (If that makes any sense).Warning signs, OMG, they were there and I ignored them. I did not want to believe he could be so cruel. I loved this man and it made me feel like what is wrong with ME, that I could love someone so nasty and cruel. I gave him my all and what he did to me, that is not a reflection of who I am, it is a reflection of who HE is.

and chica, remember:
Never
give any guy your all. Men are great actors when they wanna be. Prison?Even "better." Remember that.

I've learned a few bad relationships ago,this was a huge problem that only led to more agony/pain heartache and bullsh-t.No more."


Never will i give any man my "all." Always remember, they are just a J.A.M. (Just another man...)
KNOW your worth. LEARN IT. OWN IT...PROTECT IT, with your life. He is clearly not a real man. Let him sit in his own waste on his way back to a violation turning into prison time. Any chick who IMO get knocked up the way she did so fast, is obtuse.JMHO on this and i am sticking to it..NEVER again, give a man so much "power"over you by saying, "i've given him my all."I've been learned from doing that... I am much happier now. At least you're getting help.Some do not.You're going to be just fine. Just fine.
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Old 07-17-2017, 11:27 AM
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Default Update...No A.B. after me so far.....

Well, I just thought I would update those who care....I am doing good. Just got back from South Padre Island vacation and it was awesome. My ex's sister messaged me and gave me his address that I need for child support papers. I am not sure if it is the right address, but I will find out. I also found out that his new girlfriend is not really pregnant (not that I really care). His friend said that he told him to tell me in order to mess with me. He refused to play that game with him and told me what he said. No one from the A.B. has come after me and I was told that no one will. They are very pissed at HIM. Other than that, I am enrolled in what should be my last year of college. Yay. I seem to have put the harder classes off til the end, not thinking things through. So, 5 hard classes.. Algebra, American Government, Technical Writing, Biology and Geology. I will make it through, some how. The kids are doing good. 2nd and 4th graders this year. I finally came to the realization that what I thought I saw in him, it was no longer there. He changed, or maybe it never really was there. I think years ago, he was different. He became this cold hearted asshole after being locked up most of his life. I just saw what I thought was still there. Thinking back on things, I should have seen him for who he really is years ago. I am fine. I still have moments where I think about "what could have been" but he was not who I thought he was.
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Old 07-17-2017, 12:53 PM
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Happy to see your update and that things are moving forward in your life.
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Old 07-17-2017, 03:14 PM
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Good to hear you are gone with his games and moving forward.
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Old 07-17-2017, 03:29 PM
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Things are looking up! It sounds like you're healing and moving on while you leave him behind in his own mess. GOOD FOR YOU!!!!
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Old 07-17-2017, 05:07 PM
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At least YOU are moving forward. THAT is what is important. YOU and the children. Carry on, Lady. You appear to be moving ahead just fine, and I'm happy to hear it!
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Old 07-19-2017, 01:57 PM
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Originally Posted by Texas EZ Mom View Post
Well, I just thought I would update those who care....I am doing good. Just got back from South Padre Island vacation and it was awesome. My ex's sister messaged me and gave me his address that I need for child support papers. I am not sure if it is the right address, but I will find out. I also found out that his new girlfriend is not really pregnant (not that I really care). His friend said that he told him to tell me in order to mess with me. He refused to play that game with him and told me what he said. No one from the A.B. has come after me and I was told that no one will. They are very pissed at HIM. Other than that, I am enrolled in what should be my last year of college. Yay. I seem to have put the harder classes off til the end, not thinking things through. So, 5 hard classes.. Algebra, American Government, Technical Writing, Biology and Geology. I will make it through, some how. The kids are doing good. 2nd and 4th graders this year. I finally came to the realization that what I thought I saw in him, it was no longer there. He changed, or maybe it never really was there. I think years ago, he was different. He became this cold hearted asshole after being locked up most of his life. I just saw what I thought was still there. Thinking back on things, I should have seen him for who he really is years ago. I am fine. I still have moments where I think about "what could have been" but he was not who I thought he was.
Thanks for the update! I have been wondering about you and am glad to hear you are doing well and moving forward.

The fact that he lied about the pregnancy in order to get to you shows he is still in his game playing mode and is not being an adult.

Sounds like he knows by him exiting your life, he has taken the trash out of your life but still wants to throw trash at you from afar. How very pathetic of him.

He just wants to steal your sunshine and make you unhappy. I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of seeing me unhappy or even stressed by his petty childish BS.

I hope you can see that he has handed you the keys to freedom and can see that each ugly thing he does should be used as a stepping stone for you to walk out of his life with no guilt or worries.

Consider it this way. Some people in life are bricks and some are balloons. The balloons are destined to be happy and to move up in life. Bricks are those you stay in place and never progress and never get anywhere in life unless someone picks them up and puts them in a better place.

Now that you have unhitched yourself from this brick of a man, you are free to soar and explore and achieve your dreams.

I just went thru the breakup of my marriage due to his cheating and other crap. I took my lil balloon self and life has just gotten better and better. i am THANKFUL he cheated because it has just led me to find a better and happier place in life (where all my money is MINE to do with as I please).

Within a few months an amazing man asked me out and we have now been together over 5 months and are completely happy and building a wonderful life together. he is everything my ex never was and never could be. I just sit and laugh thinking about my ex and his gf. They got exactly what they deserve which is each other. i can't think of anything worse than being with either of them with their user/loser ways.

I do so hope you find a real and lasting love with a man who respects you and adores you. Then you will be able to see what a blessing this breakup really is and you will laugh at how stressed out it made you and you will know all the hell he put you thru was worth it to get to be in a place where you met a REAL man who wants a real life with you.
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Old 08-17-2017, 02:34 PM
Texas EZ Mom Texas EZ Mom is offline
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Default He got out 5 months ago.....

Hey yall. I just thought I would give yall an update and let yall know that I am good. I have not talked to him in months. A friend of his sent me a picture of him and man, he got fat. lol. He must be eating like a damn pig. (ok, that is not nice). I know. lol. I sound vindictive. lol. Me. I am about to start my last year of college and I will have my degree in May. I am thrilled. I am buying my books tomorrow and school starts in 10 days. yay. I have 7 classes and an internship and I am done. My kids are doing good. They are ready to start back to school. I just paid the deposit to go to Disneyworld as a graduation present to myself. I am excited. I know I will be just fine. Every once in a while I will hear a certain song or see a certain place and it takes me back to "what could have been", but I know what could have been is not really what would have ever happened. He is a narcissistic a-hole and needs professional help. Thanks for everything and for the good wishes. They are appreciated.
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