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Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison For everyone who has a husband, boyfriend or male partner incarcerated.

View Poll Results: How much do you trust your man?
100 % with NO questions asked. If he says it, I can take it to the bank. 393 52.47%
I think I can. I believe him, but there's no way to know for sure. 263 35.11%
A little bit. I know he lie's sometimes, but not about anything serious. 44 5.87%
None. I can't trust him as far as I can throw him. 49 6.54%
Voters: 749. You may not vote on this poll

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  #1  
Old 10-31-2009, 08:40 AM
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Wink How much do you trust your man?

Ok, so I am curious to see how many women trust their man. I mean he is prison, but it's still possible for him to stray. He could be writing other girls, calling them, or having visits. Are you the only one he is seeing? Are you the only one sending him money? How do you know? Share your thoughts on how much you trust your man.
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Old 10-31-2009, 09:15 AM
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Well I trust him and will continue to trust him until he proves otherwise. We have an open cummunication type relationship where we can talk about everything, and he knows about my past pains and heartbreaks and he has had similar ones. He knows the consequences of being untruthful to me even in the slightest.

Now I know he is not writing or calling anyone outside of me, his grandmother, his dude that just left, and his kids. But with that being said if some other woman want to send him money then by all mean that chica should go a head and handle hers, but there will never be anything coming from it. Because I handle my business with my man and his heart, soul, devotion, shoot his whole being is where ever I am at. And on top of that my man would tell me if and when someone else write, or send him money ... he wouldn't be able to call them because our conversations consume in the very least 255 minutues of the alloted 300 mintues per month and the rest goes to grandmom, his dude, and the kids, and if another woman was to visit him, she would be good being that I am at visit everyday visits are allowed with the exceptions of Saturdays (but then if someone visited on Saturdays I would not be able to visit on the Sundays, plus I know without a doubt I would be told on my next visit that he had a visitor *and he already know this to be fact*). But I trust HIM because I love him and he loves me, we have mutual respect for one another; and he has never given me any reason NOT to totally trust him ...

But when I think about it there is this female named FBOP that is a constant bother, but she will be out of our lives very, very soon ...
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  #3  
Old 10-31-2009, 09:22 AM
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i trust him enough to have children with him. granted thats not much now days
but for me its giving him everything i have in my life thats good and letting him
hold close to his heart. i love him deeply and risked my life to have children with
him. no there is no other, im the only one holding him down. if i find this to be
different, then we have a problem. he risks his family over another female, then
i walk away with both our sons and i wont hesitate to think twice. i dont give
2nd chances especially with my children involved. its otherwise be with me
and the boys or go be some male hooker to some dumb puta risking the
relationships of his sons.
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Old 10-31-2009, 10:01 AM
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at first i didnt trust him bc of things in our relationship that happened in the past, but hes been proving things to me which is hard from prison...but when i put money on his acct and i noticed there was more i of course would ask him and he would tel me and they get papers saying who put money on. but i talk to him everyday whether through letters or on the phone and i notice a big difference on how he handles thing like if we argue and things like that so yea i trust him now.
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Old 10-31-2009, 10:06 AM
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I trust him completely. only thing that threw me off my square was when i unexpectedly saw another member's man's ad.It took me a long time to trust him because of past hurts but it wasn't about cheating(my fears and lack of trust).
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Old 10-31-2009, 10:07 AM
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Cool I trust him as much as he trust me

I trust him...however he is human and having said that I am human also...Therefore lies can and will be told from time to time whether to hurt or protect..No one really knows anyone 100%...sometimes a lie is the only option...This is just one woman's opinion based on her experiences.
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Old 10-31-2009, 10:07 AM
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i trust him so far when it comes to this. i know i'm the only one he's calling cause he gets ten free minutes a day & i get my ten minute phonecall every day. i know i'm the only one visiting him cause he's only allowed one hour per week & i go see him every week. i know i'm the only one he's writing because getting him to write used to be like pulling teeth the first time he went away. now he writes me almost every night & i know he ain't taking the time to write anyone else. so i'm confident in this area!
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Old 10-31-2009, 10:14 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by determined823 View Post
Ok, so I am curious to see how many women trust their man. I mean he is prison, but it's still possible for him to stray. He could be writing other girls, calling them, or having visits. Are you the only one he is seeing? Are you the only one sending him money? How do you know? Share your thoughts on how much you trust your man.
If you cant trust your man your married too, what is the purpose of being married for?
If you cant trust the person your with, why be with him???
If you have doubts about your man, why you with him?

I trust my husband to the fullest with no hesitation...
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Old 10-31-2009, 10:27 AM
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I guess you are talking about trusting in the area of cheating since those are the examples you give? I don't believe he is going to do anything to break my trust in that area. I darn well know he doesn't get visits. Everytime I go to visit him his visitors list is MIA at the front desk, so he sent me his copy so I wouldn't get denied anymore. This is how it all plays out for me....

He can play me for the fool all he wants, but if he does....he's going to get caught and lose me. Not that I'm perfect, but I'm a darn good, scratch that, GREAT woman to him. (He knows it and says it all the time.) Sure it would hurt if he cheated on me, but I will hold my head high, knowing I was a good woman to him and did everything in the name of love. I have nothing to be ashamed of! His loss if he wants to go there!!!

I don't think I could ever trust anyone 100%. Let's face it, we all fall short in areas. To me, trust comes from making your actions match up with your words. I know I've said tons of things and then not did them, but the vast majority I do. Simple things like saying, "I'm going to call the dr today" and then not doing that..... Plus, my man is in prison for something I don't approve of, so to say I trust him 100.....obviously he broke it in the past. I'll give him a 98%. lol....
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Old 10-31-2009, 10:32 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by prodicaldaugter View Post
Well I trust him and will continue to trust him until he proves otherwise. We have an open cummunication type relationship where we can talk about everything, and he knows about my past pains and heartbreaks and he has had similar ones. He knows the consequences of being untruthful to me even in the slightest.

Now I know he is not writing or calling anyone outside of me, his grandmother, his dude that just left, and his kids. But with that being said if some other woman want to send him money then by all mean that chica should go a head and handle hers, but there will never be anything coming from it. Because I handle my business with my man and his heart, soul, devotion, shoot his whole being is where ever I am at. And on top of that my man would tell me if and when someone else write, or send him money ... he wouldn't be able to call them because our conversations consume in the very least 255 minutues of the alloted 300 mintues per month and the rest goes to grandmom, his dude, and the kids, and if another woman was to visit him, she would be good being that I am at visit everyday visits are allowed with the exceptions of Saturdays (but then if someone visited on Saturdays I would not be able to visit on the Sundays, plus I know without a doubt I would be told on my next visit that he had a visitor *and he already know this to be fact*). But I trust HIM because I love him and he loves me, we have mutual respect for one another; and he has never given me any reason NOT to totally trust him ...

But when I think about it there is this female named FBOP that is a constant bother, but she will be out of our lives very, very soon ...
Yep this is the case for me to. I am the only visitor on every visit, every week. I used to worry about other women sending heim money but whatever. If she wants to send money go ahead and help me out and that's how I look at it. I was also having some trust issues due to my past but we have been working together to make it the best relationship ever considering the current situation. I love him soooo much!!!

sisnik
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Old 10-31-2009, 10:36 AM
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I don't think I could standy by him and give him all the support I do if I didn't trust him in return and know that he would do the same for me. It's hard enough to be in a relationship with someone incarcerated, but it keeps me going knowing that he would do the same for me if he needed too.
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Old 10-31-2009, 10:49 AM
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I agree with you ... I don't believe any of us do what we do simply out of not having anything else to do. It take a strong love and commitment to 100% stand by your man or woman in this type of situation. Often times when I am at visit and there is usual a new person visit her loved one and the question would come up about how often I visit and how long I have been doing this. And when I tell them the response is usualy now that is love, but for me I am not doing anything new I am not the first and definitely not the last. There are women who have been down for their man for decades faithfully and there is a strong mutual trust on both parts,, and these are the women I look up to and if and when I need that extra boost of outter strenght I turn to them (whether they know it or not) ... This journey is not for everyone ... it takes a very strong couple to get through this with the relationship still very much intacted.

***I know I got a little off topic, for that I humbly apologize***

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I don't think I could standy by him and give him all the support I do if I didn't trust him in return and know that he would do the same for me. It's hard enough to be in a relationship with someone incarcerated, but it keeps me going knowing that he would do the same for me if he needed too.
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Old 10-31-2009, 11:03 AM
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it was hard to @ first given the BS i went thru with "T" but Patrick has proven 10 fold that he's mine and im his
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Old 10-31-2009, 11:20 AM
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Trust did not come easy to me in the beginning but his actions have proven his words to me. I have no doubts that he is completely faithful to me. I know that, with rare exception, he gets no other money on his account and when he does, he tells me. Geographically, visits are difficult to accomplish for me and for his family but I know who is on the visitor's list, who comes and when he comes. Without this trust, I never have stuck it out this far.

All that being said, I am a realist. I have never and will never put 100 percent trust in anyone but myself. Humans, by our very nature, are fallible. Blind faith and sticking my head in the sand are two things I've never done well...
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Old 10-31-2009, 11:38 AM
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I trust him because I know him. I trust him because not only am I his wife but his best friend. My husband is old school and loyalty, honor and respect are the very core of who he is and how he lives his life. Cheating in any aspect would violate all 3. I didn't worry about it when he was home and I don't worry about it now.
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Old 10-31-2009, 11:39 AM
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Right now I trust him. I've been told that he doesn't seem like he would be "that kind" & I tend to agree. His actions so far have shown me that he likely isn't the kind to cheat. But it also doesn't mean that I'm going to be complacent on the subject either. I don't request visitor & phone lists, etc., but I do pay attention. I agree with KensBrawd that you can't ever really know a person 100%. Communication can break down, ish can happen to change the dynamics of a relationship & the next thing you know......there's a problem. I don't think I'll ever be 100% confident about this and yanno, I'm not so sure that's a bad thing.
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Old 10-31-2009, 12:54 PM
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I trust my man. Other girls wouldn't have time to visit I am there all the time.. He has never given me a reason to doubt him. So until he proves me otherwise I will continue to have his back unconditionally.
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Old 10-31-2009, 01:34 PM
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I trust my baby 100% and wouldn't be with him if I had a doubt. We went through a rough patch not too long ago but my trust has never even wavered. I love him and can't wait to spend the rest of my life with him.
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Old 10-31-2009, 02:17 PM
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I trust him with my life, no questions, no concerns.
I don't believe that there can be a relationship with no trust. He never have me a reason not to trust him, so I'm not going to add prison to the equation and change the trust I have in him.
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Old 10-31-2009, 05:17 PM
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We trust each other equally (100%) and are fully committed to this relationship.

He knows he can go if and when ever he feels unfulfilled or has the desire to check out the grass on the other side of the fence.

Honesty and open communication is a must, which we have and which leads me to trust him with my life.
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Old 10-31-2009, 05:39 PM
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I trust him more and more each day. I dont know why, but this expierence has brought us closer and more "in tune" with each other. We're always 100% honest with one another and share everything, so why wouldnt I trust him?
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Old 10-31-2009, 06:01 PM
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I trust him but I am still worried that he may cheat only because of my insecurities (weight issues and other stuff) I cheated on him once during his last bid and I told him abt it he forgave me and we are still together BUT my ? to him is: If I cheated on you, why are u still with me? He says because he loves me and that he would never cheat but to me UNLESS he was a cheater himself he would have bounced once I told him. I am working on trusting him 100% because that's how much he trusts me
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Old 10-31-2009, 06:31 PM
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Thumbs up Of course I do!

I most certainly trust my boo, our union thrives off of loyalty,trust, and committment,if u don't have that,then the union is for a reason or season,and not for a lifetime. I love and trust mines wholeheartedly,Im getting what
I give and that's "Loyalty,trust and committment! Toodles!
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Old 10-31-2009, 07:43 PM
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Trust is earned and once it is broke it is not freely given. Having said this I also must say I am married to an addict. Trust will have to be earned and there is nothing I would like more but until he is free and shows me he is trustworthy again, hell no I dont trust him 100%.
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Old 10-31-2009, 08:23 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by akaptrosa View Post
i guess you are talking about trusting in the area of cheating since those are the examples you give? I don't believe he is going to do anything to break my trust in that area. I darn well know he doesn't get visits. Everytime i go to visit him his visitors list is mia at the front desk, so he sent me his copy so i wouldn't get denied anymore. This is how it all plays out for me....

He can play me for the fool all he wants, but if he does....he's going to get caught and lose me. Not that i'm perfect, but i'm a darn good, scratch that, great woman to him. (he knows it and says it all the time.) sure it would hurt if he cheated on me, but i will hold my head high, knowing i was a good woman to him and did everything in the name of love. I have nothing to be ashamed of! His loss if he wants to go there!!!

I don't think i could ever trust anyone 100%. Let's face it, we all fall short in areas. To me, trust comes from making your actions match up with your words. I know i've said tons of things and then not did them, but the vast majority i do. Simple things like saying, "i'm going to call the dr today" and then not doing that..... Plus, my man is in prison for something i don't approve of, so to say i trust him 100.....obviously he broke it in the past. I'll give him a 98%. Lol....


everything she said!!!!!!!!!!
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