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Friends & Families of Addicts Information for coping, dealing & living with a loved one's addictive behavior.

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  #1  
Old 07-24-2014, 05:07 PM
RBASa RBASa is offline
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Default Meth use

I have a question about meth use....and I feel silly about asking it because I use to be a user( 8 years off drugs) looking back I don't know what I put others through or how I was, so I finding my situation difficult to judge...I recently met a guy on the outside( he has been in jail before, years ago) we have just been talking and I find that I'm beginning to have feelings for him. He was very hard to get to know at first, not very open and very spar-attic with communication, lately we have been getting closer with our talking and he's opening up a lot more....there seems to be some drama with some other ladies who face-booked messaged me saying he is a meth addict, and a womanizer...this women is a ex gf who apparently is mad because he broke up with her( way to much drama for me) anyways he told me that he does drugs, and that he has a lot of problems and is at a low point in his life. He had a wife and kids, and seemed happy, but not now. Over our conversations he seemed to drop off and disappear, then he would call and message....he said that when he goes on binges he can't have contact with anyone he cares about and won't communicate for days...my question is why he does this are they excuses? And how long can they last? I'm finding myself more concerned about him as in a friend way, and I'm trying to be a positive support in his life....I'm just wondering if I'm wasting my time? Am I being played? There's been no physical touching or anything but he has told me he wants me in his life...I just don't know what to think about it.sorry this is so long, and not about an inmate.
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Old 07-24-2014, 05:29 PM
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Well iv been in them kinda places, iv used opiates for 5 years straight so i know what addiction is. and yes people who are hard on drugs they go on binges, and go missing for days meth is a hard hard drug, there was some1 recently i was seeing kind of start of the year, great guy, but he was a user and he ended up gettn locked up shop lifting at walmart, to get his fix, and i feel so bad because maybe the old me yes i would of taken on the relationship more seriously, and waited and everything and now hes doing 3-5 years and just got out, doing 3years not even a few months he got locked up again, ill never do it again, get into a relationship with a user. my ex husband was an addict thats how i fell into addiction and learning drugs, doing em. u said u were using before or clean now for 8 years? well people who use are so inconsistent not all of em, but most of em, i know some people who are better and productive while high as people because they function better they study better, the aren't strung out, some people you can tell and can't how long have you guys been dating maybe he means he wants you in his life to be there, maybe not a relationship? it seems risky. if it was me id say keep a distance between you guys. this is how bad iv seen drug uses that my bf is doing a life sentence we are MWI i met him after he got locked up, honestly i'd rather be with my bf who is clean not on drugs, than for me to be with a man in the free world on drugs. thats just me. thats how serious i am.
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Old 07-24-2014, 09:23 PM
xolady xolady is offline
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steer clear if the flags are out and they are stay away.
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Old 07-24-2014, 10:54 PM
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Heed the warnings!
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Old 07-25-2014, 12:53 AM
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Darlin' you made your escape and now you tryna be sucked back in (trust that) to the lifestyle. You know better. The crow flies straight...
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Old 07-25-2014, 04:11 AM
jadah jadah is offline
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Don't let yourself try to "fix" or "rescue"...go to a meeting instead.
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Old 07-25-2014, 07:45 AM
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Which do you prefer - your sobriety or this guy? He will drag you backward, right back to your addiction, and I guarantee that he's not worth it.

He has to get sober alone. With a group that knows all the tricks addicts have and can call him on every one. You are not a group, and obviously you don't know all the tricks, so you can't do a damned bit of good.
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Old 07-25-2014, 09:01 AM
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Thank you for you're responses, as always it helps to hear outside views from people who can see the big picture. I was falling into the "fixer" habits again. Thanks to all.
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