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Maryland General Prison Talk, Introductions & Chit Chat Topics & Discussions relating to Prison & the Criminal Justice System in Maryland that do not fit into any other Maryland sub-forum category. Please feel free to also introduce yourself to other members in the state and talk about whatever topics come to mind that may not have anything to do with prison.

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  #101  
Old 10-21-2009, 11:03 PM
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DOC, I'm so sorry to hear about your cat! I've lost a few dogs throughout my life, so I can definitely feel your pain. As a matter of fact, I just finished crying my eyes out while watching Marley & Me! It's good, but I don't think I can ever watch that movie again...it's too sad for me!
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  #102  
Old 10-22-2009, 04:25 AM
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Chick I love that movie but, yeah that is a one and done type of movie!!

Well I am doing good this am. Just getting ready for work. Thank god it's almost friday! One day closer til we can see out men!!!!! yippie
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  #103  
Old 10-22-2009, 07:40 AM
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Hey Ladies,

I am new to the Maryland Forum. I am addicted to this site now. I joined a couple of weeks ago and I am glad that I have found a home where there are people in my situation that can understand my struggle.

My fiance went up for parole and was supposed to come home in December but the second commissioner denied him so he won't be coming home until October 2011. The only bright side to this situation is he is still only 35 minutes away from me and I can still visit him twice a week. He took the news way better than I did. I have tried to be positive but every since his decision came back his attitude has been a little different is this something common? I have never been through this before and all he keeps saying is in 12 months I will be home in your arms but his actions are saying something totally different then his words. What do you think?
  #104  
Old 10-22-2009, 11:48 AM
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Thanks guys, yesterday was horrible, but today already seems alittle better. The rest of my little brood seems to be adjusting better today.
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  #105  
Old 10-22-2009, 04:57 PM
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Glad to hear that today was a little better DOC!

Jay's - it's hard to say! It could be a million things and since we don't really know too much about what "different" means, it's kind of hard to guess! Is he being distant? Treating you like crap? Being negative? Actin' hard? He could be feeling a little depressed because he got denied, he could be feeling afraid that you're going to leave him, he could be feeling kind of hopeless like he's done everything he needs to do and can't catch a break. He might just be settling in and getting used to the idea that he's going to be there awhile. If he hasn't been in long, he might just still be adjusting. We can guess all day, but the best thing is probably just to ask him!
  #106  
Old 10-22-2009, 05:09 PM
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Doc glad u are better!!!!!!

Jay's lady- Hi and welcome! I am addicted too. lol. I could not agree more with what chick has said. It is a roller coaster a lot of the time. One conversation they are up and full of life the next everything is wrong so wrong. It is hard to know what they are feeling. ASK HIM!!!!!!

I got to talk to him last night but, no phone call yet today. Hopefully, he will call me tonight. I missed him so much
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  #107  
Old 10-22-2009, 08:37 PM
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I know how you feel Jeffs! My man hasn't called since Monday and I'm missing him like crazy. He doesn't normally call me every day, more like two or three times a week and that's cool...but sometimes I just miss him a little more than normal.

Oh well, at least tomorrow is Friday and I have a pretty fun weekend lined up!

Hope you all have a great weekend!
  #108  
Old 10-22-2009, 11:32 PM
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Chick he did call me we had the best talk. I live for those calls. I know u know what I mean!!!!! What are u up to this weekend?

I am going to see him this weekend!!!!! Can''t wait to hug him
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  #109  
Old 10-23-2009, 11:27 AM
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Hey Ladies,

Thanks for the warm reception. He has been in for 2 1/2 years but I think he is just frustrated because everything they have asked him to do he has complied with but they denied him anyway. When I said different I mean like when he gave me the final decision that came back from the appeals office he said he was ok with it and he said he only has 12 months left until he comes home so he just wants to move to his next destination of work release but then he wrote me a letter two days later saying that he was tired of fighting and sometimes wants to give up but I am the only thing that is keeping him around. I am used to him being so strong and I have seen so many different sides to him lately I just fear that sometimes I am going to lose him and not get him back. He has never mistreated me or ever spoken to me harshly. We have never so much as had an arguement if you can believe that, but he just seems so distant sometimes. I feel his heart hardening because he feels like he is being punished for a crime he did not knowingly commit and the other party is roaming free. I am sorry for the long blog, I just needed to vent. On the upside he did call me this morning just to tell me he loves me and to have a good day, so I guess the day is looking better.

I do get to see him tomorrow as Saturday is one of our visiting days so I am really happy about this too.

Jeff's, I love those talks too, lol. I am glad you got your phone call.

Last edited by Jay'sLady; 10-23-2009 at 11:30 AM..
  #110  
Old 10-24-2009, 01:50 AM
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Jay's Like I said there will be good days and bad days for our guys. Hot one day cold the next. I don't pretend to know what he goes thru in there. I don't want to know. The little bit he tells me freaks me out. Jeff and I harldy ever fight. We talk almost everyday and I see him almost every weekend. Jeff and I have known each other forever and a day I was 17 when I met him and 33 now. WOW! Damn I am really 33 shhhessshhhh anywhoooo. We got back together last year. He was already sentenced and I knew was I was facing. LIFE!!!!! He knows I love him but, he still has his moments of what if's...... his new one is what if I never come home. It kills him that he can't do the things for me he once did. I am content in our realtionship... do I hate where he is YES!!!! That does not change the way I feel about him. He was my first love. As close as we are there is sometimes a distance between us. All we can do is support them and listen to their feelings.This too shall pass.......... Glad u are seeing him this weekend.


Well I am making that drive in about 2 hours!!!!! Can't wait to see him! Ladies who are visiting this weekend have a safe trip!!!!!
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  #111  
Old 10-24-2009, 07:57 AM
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It is common for them to act different when denied, especially if they were pumped up to go home..They can get real depressed too.
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  #112  
Old 10-24-2009, 11:22 AM
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Thanks Ladies.

All of you going on your visits this weekend be safe. My visits aren't until 7pm so I have a little time to go. I am hoping he is in a better mood today. I thank you all for the advice.

Jay's Lady Always and Forever His Not Even Death Can Make Us Part.
  #113  
Old 10-25-2009, 11:59 AM
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Hi everyone! Just checking in on you all. I think about you all often and keep you in my prayers too.

It's been a little over two months since he's been home and it's almost hard to remember what it was like for him to be gone (although some days, I'd really like to remember LOL). We're about to have a court battle with his ex for primary custody of his boys (who have been living here since before he came home). Nervous about that, but thinking positive anyway.

Hope you all are doing well!
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  #114  
Old 10-26-2009, 06:45 AM
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Good Morning Ladies,

Ok, so I went to see him Saturday and he was in a better mood but still a little distant. I took the advice from all of you and asked him what is going on and he said he is just angry. He feels like he is the only one being punished for his crime and the other party walked away free. He is frustrated because he complied with all of the stipulations they put on him and they still denied him. We are now in the process of going before the judge for a reconsideration of his sentencing but who knows if she will even grant him a hearing. I am trying to be very supportive and I have been working myself crazy taking care of home, him and me, but his moods are now taking an emotional toll on me. I am trying to be there for him but I got a bunch of craziness going on at home. I have my 15 year old son who is stressing me out with his grades in school and the fact that his stepfather is not home and he feels he can do whatever he wants. I guess things could be much worse. Sorry I just needed to vent this morning.

So how was everyone else's weekend?
  #115  
Old 10-26-2009, 06:31 PM
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Jays may I ask how much time your man has????

My weekend was fabulous!!!! Got to see him 2 days in a row. Well friday was a bad day indeed and I knew something was wrong with him. VERY VERY WRONG. He was so mad and upset and I asked him what is wrong? He is like I just need to see you. Then he got really serious and was like you love me no matter what right and you will never leave me because if you do I don't want to live!!!!! HUH???????? OMG WHAT? He never talks like that. He has been having PMS lately (prison mood swings) I was wondering what the heck was going on. He was like nothing I just need you!!! Promise, swear u won't leave me. Then Sunday I found out that he went for modification and did not get it so he has to stay 3 hours away at least for another year I was like baby I am your ride or die chick and I am not going anywhere!! They denied his request for medium security. I just am supporting him and showing him I love him and I am in it for the long haul. See ups and downs always with our men.

Ndj We miss ya!!!!

I hope all my girls are doing well. Hope you have a great week!!!!! I am going up again this weekend. I live for the weekends with him.
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  #116  
Old 10-26-2009, 07:47 PM
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Jeffs, that's no lie! I know I used to love weekends...but now I LIVE for weekends. haha. We just had a really good heart-to-heart conversation and I always hang up the phone missing him more than I did before he called!

We visited on Saturday and had a really great visit, then I went to a family party and a party with some friends. On Sunday, his son called me bright and early and wanted to "hang out" for the day and then go visit his father...so I went and picked him up and we spent a bunch of time (and money! haha) at an arcade and got lunch and stuff. My man was SOOO surprised to see his son when he walked into the visiting room - the look on his face was priceless! Totally worth all of the "entertainment" I had to do all day. haha. I'm still pretty tired from the weekend, but already counting down until next weekend!

Hopefully my guy will be on his way home soon - he submitted a request for the box back in September and his paperwork finally made it to the Home Detention Unit. I called up there today and they said that his paperwork is "in process". I don't want to get my hopes up too much, but he's telling me that he thinks he'll be home in less than 2 weeks and he's getting me all excited...I was at the grocery store tonight and I even started buying up some of his favorite food for some reason! haha. I hate getting my hopes up, but he wants me to think positive so I guess I might as well! He's getting impatient (of course), but I keep reminding him that coming home early on home detention would be a PLUS and he needs to be thankful for what he DOES have right now - but it would be great to have my man home! (Can you tell I feel a little excited about the prospect??)

Jeffs, sorry to hear about the outcome of your man's modification! In the grand scheme of things, a year isn't THAT long...right? (Positivity anyone??) haha.

Jays - vent all you want...if the PTO ladies don't understand, then who will? : ) We've all been down those roads before, and (to be honest - sorry!), it sounds like your man needs a little tough love from you. I mean, you guys can't control who is being punished and who isn't being punished so he just needs to suck it up and deal with the consequences - meanwhile, you're holding down everything! (This kind of reminds me of when I was a kid and my brother and I would both do something wrong...he would get caught and I wouldn't, then he would tell on me but that didn't make his punishment any easier!) Try not to stress yourself out too much mama!

NDJS - Good luck in the court battle...I know all too well how crazy that stuff can get! Once you guys get all of this settled, you need a vacation or something...you've been through a lot this year!

Have a great week ladies!
  #117  
Old 10-27-2009, 05:08 AM
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Chick- That is awesome!!!! 2 weeks will be awesome!!!! I will be praying for you guys! Yeap when you were in the store must have been something telling u to buy his favorite stuff! Something great is going to happen. Good luck!!!!!

Jays- Yup vent all you want. We are all here for ya and we are like a family!!!!


Something really strange happened. I called up to the jail to ask his case worker a question that Jeff wanted to know about his test results and what is going on with school. I have spoken to him a few times since he has been there. He was like ummm I know we have spoke before but, I don't know if you know that he is serving LIFE and I am assuming he did not tell you that. WHAT?????? I was very nice and said ummmm yes I do know. To this his next question was WHY? Why I am with a lifer? I said something you could never understand and hung up. Jeff later told me that when he met with him, he was loke have u not put your family thru enough? You need to start thinking about what you do. Ok needless to say Jeff was pissed. I was like baby everyone will always judge it's their problem not ours!!!!! I hate some people I swear!!!!! He had some big nerve. Oh well this too shall pass.


Getting ready for work.. Have a great day ladies!!!!
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  #118  
Old 10-27-2009, 09:49 AM
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Jeff's - He has 5 years and has already served 30 months. He is supposed to come home in October 2010 if he doesn't get into any trouble.

Chick - I have been giving him tough love and I think now he may be looking for some sympathy. I have given him the you can't help what other people do speech. He is going through as Jeff's called it PMS this last week.

I am going to see him today so hopefully he is in a better mood.

Have a great day ladies and thanks for the support.
  #119  
Old 10-28-2009, 04:52 AM
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Jay's I hope your visit went well!!!! Yup the pms can be bad. Just listen and love- sometimes tough love.

FINALLY SOME GOOD NEWS!!!!!!!
I got a message from Jeffs lawyer last night. We are trying to get a sentence reduction and he was not sure that it was put in by his former lawyer from 14 years ago. It was put in!!!!! So he can have a court date very soon. He wants a few more weeks to review the file and see what the next move should be. He did say this is really good news. I have not told Jeff yet. I talked to his Mom and she was like it's your call but, I would not tell him unless you know what is going on because all he is going to do is worry and ask you everyday if you talked to the lawyer. I agreed plus since his bad news I am not rocking the boat. So I am just waiting.

Hmmmm waiting....... It seems like all we do is wait. Wait for answers, wait for phone calls, wait for letters.....shhhesssshhhh this can be so hard.

I am going to see him this weekend YAH!!!! Come on friday Lol. Have a great day ladies!!!
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  #120  
Old 10-29-2009, 04:54 PM
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Hello ladies. The weekend is almost here. I hope everyone has had a good week and love ones doing well.

Jeffs- Keep us posted on the sentence modification and what the lawyer suggestions are, we are going through the same thing.
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Old 10-29-2009, 08:13 PM
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Hi ladies! Just checking on you all.

Jays - girl, vent all you want here. We're here for you! ((hugs))
Chick - two weeks! I hope it happens for you guys! Fingers are crossed and prayers being said! You deserve to have your man home - well you all do!
Jeffs - keeping everything crossed for your man as well. Hope the sentence reduction goes in his favor! I'm sorry that is modification didn't work out.

My man's ex wife has failed (so far) to file an Answer to the custody modification papers. She was served almost 4 weeks ago and only has until next Tuesday to file an answer. Hopefully she doesn't and we'll just have a quick hearing to make it all official. We also have a hearing about his child support, but not till January. In the meantime, he's paying her over $500 a month AND the kids are living here and we're supporting them. We filed our petition to close the CS case in September and they schedule a hearing for January. Nice.

Anyway, that's my news. Hope you all have a wonderful weekend!
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Old 10-30-2009, 05:07 AM
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Ms- I will deff keep you guys updated!!!! This is the first step that we have done since he was locked up 14 years ago. His new lawyer is suppose to be a mirical worker who sat on the parole board. I don't want to get my hopes all up but, I have this really good feeling! No I don't think he is comming home tomm, but it is a step closer in our race.

Ndj- I will be praying for you guys as well. I am so happy you are still checking in with us.

Well it's FRIDAY!!!!!! Yah I am going up to see him tomm. They thought I had pink eye but, turns out it's a bad eye allergey and I can't wear make up! Plus my eye is red and puffy. I told him to be prepared. He was like baby if you think u without make up bothers me your crazy..... I love you in sickness and health remember. He said would you love me or look at me different if I had a red eye? Good point baby...lol. I forget just how much he loves me sometimes.

On another note. I am a Social worker in a nursing home and we are all dressing up. I am being a lady bug and Jeff was like I SOOOOOOO WANT PICS. Oh good grief. I guess you know it's love when you don't care how silly you look you will still send the pics! Hope everyone is doing great. Enjoy your friday ladies. Hope we all get to see our guys this weekend!
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  #123  
Old 10-30-2009, 10:16 AM
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Hello Ladies,

Well it's one day closer to me seeing the love of my life.

Jeff's - the visit was great on Tuesday he was in a really good mood then but we are back to the PMS today. My phone call this morning was bittersweet. He is missing his kids and their mothers will not let him see them and everyone around him is going home so he is down in the dumps. But I am taking our Goddaughter to see him tomorrow so that should brighten up his spirits. I am praying for you and your man. I have my fingers, eyes and toes crossed for you. I hope your allergy clears up.

NDJ - Thanks girl.

I hope everyone has a good visit with their man. As for me I am going to pray for some good news from his lawyer about his reconsideration of his sentencing.
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Old 10-30-2009, 09:10 PM
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Hey Ladies-
so much chatter since I last checked in- im loving it!
The baby and I have been up to see big Jeb 5 times in the last 3 weeks of his new life and I have to be honest- its been really great and really hard at the same time as you can probably imagine. Jeb and I are struggling being apart with the new baby here but are endlessly greatful for our miracle baby
Other than that, not much is going on, we're still waiting on his case manager to see him. How can guys that came to the prison after him see their case manager before my guy? Frustrating.
As for me my days are filled with trying to read a crying baby's mind and then adhere to his demands Tiring but well worth it.
Take it easy ladies!
Happy Halloween!
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  #125  
Old 10-31-2009, 07:15 AM
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Jebs: You will eventually be able to read minds, and by next year have eyes in the back of your head :-)
Always frustrating waiting for something positive when waiting on "DOC time".

Jays: Denials really can mess with a guy, then on top of it, being in a place where everyone seems to be going home? That makes it doubly hard for him and it could be a while until he gets back to "normal".

As for us, we keep on, keeping on.
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