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Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison For everyone who has a husband, boyfriend or male partner incarcerated.

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  #1  
Old 12-16-2006, 08:04 PM
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Question Ladies: First bid with your man or been there done that?

Just wondering how many ladies are going through this for the first time or how many have been there done that..back there again? My baby daddy has served a year in county only. This is his first bid behind the walls. Hopefully he's set straight this time around. To those who are going through this for the 2nd, 3rd, etc time, did you say you wouldn't stick by him if it happened again? Did you?
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Old 12-16-2006, 08:07 PM
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First, last, and only. If I get another collect call from an inmate, I am not picking up the phone!
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Old 12-16-2006, 08:16 PM
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First and last we pray!
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Old 12-16-2006, 09:26 PM
EricNLynsA EricNLynsA is offline
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This is my husbands first time in. I never want to do this again and neither does he. He had already been walking a clean line for 3 years on probation before he was put in and has been there now for almost 2 years and 1 to go. It upsets me that the only reason he his there is because he wouldn't rat out his old connection to two state troopers for 24 months so they finally pinned he with some old charges. Even after he had turned his life around for so long and I was pregnant with our 3rd child they still screwed with him. I really don't blame my husband for not being a rat. I would rather him be there than have ratted them out and risked the lives of me and the kids. Those kind of people have and would kill again.

It's better to sacrifice 3 years behind bars than the lives of your loved ones.
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Old 12-16-2006, 09:29 PM
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Well, yes and no.. My husband went to the county jail in December 05. .(That is where I found him, after 2 months of being seperated) and then he went to the pen in Jan 06 and got released in April 06.. April 06 he went back in, and he is being released December 25th 06.. So no not the 1st time being with someone in the pen, but yes, doing so from beginning to end..
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  #6  
Old 12-16-2006, 09:30 PM
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Default first timer here

this is my first bid with him...hopefully the last...but if he doesnt max out and something happens, i will be there for him.
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Old 12-16-2006, 09:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EricNLynsA
This is my husbands first time in. I never want to do this again and neither does he. He had already been walking a clean line for 3 years on probation before he was put in and has been there now for almost 2 years and 1 to go. It upsets me that the only reason he his there is because he wouldn't rat out his old connection to two state troopers for 24 months so they finally pinned he with some old charges. Even after he had turned his life around for so long and I was pregnant with our 3rd child they still screwed with him. I really don't blame my husband for not being a rat. I would rather him be there than have ratted them out and risked the lives of me and the kids. Those kind of people have and would kill again.

It's better to sacrifice 3 years behind bars than the lives of your loved ones.
Yeah..that's my opinion, as well. Ant says he would never be a snitch. You know, however, that's how he's in this time.... being at the wrong place at the wrong time and being snitched on..but at the same time he wasn't the one that was supposed to be pinned. All that mixed in with some crooked cops equals pen for him! Kinda weird, though, rumors out here about him snitching...like he says "If I were a snitch, I would be out this MF" :::sigh:::
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Old 12-16-2006, 09:44 PM
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been there done that but this is the first time weve technically been together. but ive rode the ride and will continue... i love him
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  #9  
Old 12-16-2006, 09:50 PM
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Well, it looks like I may be one of those who has done more than one shot at this.

My husband has been revoked twice & I'm still with him. I did tell him the first time around that I wouldn't wait again. Then he was revoked & I did some really hard thinking. I wanted to leave, but the more I prayed to God about it, the more I knew that leaving wasn't the right thing.

This third time he was revoked for 15 months (the second time was only 3 months). I never considered leaving him. The circumstances were different & I feel like God "purified" my heart during those 3 months when he was down the first time. I've never loved anyone except my husband. We have 3 children & I know that this time is the last one. Some may be cynical when they read through some of my previous posts, but I have seen a phenomenal change in his life. God has been good to us & when he gets home, we'll be a family again - this time for good on the outside.
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  #10  
Old 12-16-2006, 09:52 PM
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Been there done that but not so well the first time. And yes I said that I would never do it again. But shame on you the first time, shame on me the second time, There will NOT be a third for me. Life is just too short.
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  #11  
Old 12-16-2006, 10:58 PM
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This is my first and only time. My honey already understands if he gets out and doesn't want to live right then he won't be living with me. I will love him no matter what but i won't be able to stay with him if he gets out and gets into trouble again.
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Old 12-16-2006, 11:10 PM
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I've done 2 with him, he's home now might go back on some old charges, I'll be right there for him. Never said I wouldn't and I'll be damned if I let the DOC interfere with my relationship!

Patty
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  #13  
Old 12-16-2006, 11:15 PM
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This is his first time going to prison and his last I will do everything in my power to keep him from going back.
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Old 12-16-2006, 11:32 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HotLatinaMILF4U
I've done 2 with him, he's home now might go back on some old charges, I'll be right there for him. Never said I wouldn't and I'll be damned if I let the DOC interfere with my relationship!

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Old 12-16-2006, 11:38 PM
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This is the first and last. I have said I would never do this again and mean it minus one exception. That would be a violation of parole due to something out of his control i.e. Psycho Ex-girlfriend. But I really can't do this again it is unfair to me to do this again.
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Old 12-17-2006, 09:31 AM
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this is my mans 3rd time in prison but all of the other times he was only there for a year or so not real long and this time all together he will have been there 5 years so if this isnt the last time I have already told him time and time again that he will be doing the next trip on his own!
not saying that I wont still be his friend but I wont put my life on hold relationship wise anymore!
I love him with all of my heart I have been with him since I was 17 and I turned 24 today but if he doesnt love hiself or me enough to be done with the prison life than thats on him!!
dont mean to sound bitchy but its the truth!!

Amanda
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Old 12-17-2006, 09:38 AM
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My sweetie was in before we met, but this is the last time he'll be in, cause I'd kill him first. (joke) I'll always be here for him.
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Old 12-17-2006, 10:42 AM
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First bid and only bid.

He has no intention of going back, and he is determined to get his life on track and succeed in his goals.
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Old 12-17-2006, 11:40 AM
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This is the first one I've done with him... and hopefully the last! I already told him I can't do this sh*t again if he catches another charge or long bid (a technical parole violation I could probably deal with, depends on the circumstances)... he keeps telling me not to worry about it, that he could never put me through this again, etc etc... but only time will tell, so we'll see what happens.
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  #20  
Old 12-17-2006, 02:07 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by waitingon2009
this is my mans 3rd time in prison but all of the other times he was only there for a year or so not real long and this time all together he will have been there 5 years so if this isnt the last time I have already told him time and time again that he will be doing the next trip on his own!
not saying that I wont still be his friend but I wont put my life on hold relationship wise anymore!
I love him with all of my heart I have been with him since I was 17 and I turned 24 today but if he doesnt love hiself or me enough to be done with the prison life than thats on him!!
dont mean to sound bitchy but its the truth!!

Amanda
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  #21  
Old 12-17-2006, 02:11 PM
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Wink Been there done that....and back again!

This is my 2nd time behind prison walls, but I've also done 3 months in county with him last year at this time. Yes I told him I wouldn't do it again, but what can I do, I LOVE HIM MORE AND MORE EVERY SECOND OF EVERYDAY! I guess I'm just weak. I do hate this more than anything, because I can't even visit this time, because I'm in Idaho and he's in California. But that's my soul mate, I'm lost without him. I can't live without him in my life, period.

Froggyz Girl:love:
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  #22  
Old 12-17-2006, 02:16 PM
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Hey, we all love our inmates on here! FYI My question referring to anybody saying they wouldn't do it again is pure curiosity on my part...if you said you weren't and now are... and vice versa!!! No judgements intended by me!
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  #23  
Old 12-17-2006, 02:17 PM
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Red face Been there

Been in and out a couple of months in then get out but know this is his first long bid 5 years. this is the second one I'm doing with him last year july and this one here he got arrested last year dec. he did a year at the county now he has to do the 4 at state level.
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  #24  
Old 12-17-2006, 03:42 PM
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I met him while he was in, so yes, this is my first time. Hopefully when he comes home he will never go back. But I stand by him again if I have to. I love him that much and could not see myself with anyone else.
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  #25  
Old 12-23-2006, 01:54 PM
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Does anybody THINK it will have to be done again? As in, do you believe he'll be out and be straight?
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