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When the Relationship is Over... This forum is about discussing your thoughts, feelings and issues now that you and your incarcerated (or formerly incarcerated) loved one are no longer together. (This forum is NOT for bashing - please read the rules before posting.)

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  #26  
Old 04-08-2019, 08:18 AM
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MissOne MissOne is offline
Is in the Hizzouse!
 

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Stay strong when or if he tries to Hoover you back in.
Please believe he will If he even thinks there is more supply to be gained.
And I am sorry this happened to you.
Thanks all for the Kind words, information and encouragement has been given.
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Last edited by MissOne; 04-08-2019 at 08:20 AM..
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  #27  
Old 04-08-2019, 08:13 PM
BKQueen BKQueen is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MissOne View Post
Stay strong when or if he tries to Hoover you back in.
Please believe he will If he even thinks there is more supply to be gained.
And I am sorry this happened to you.
Thanks all for the Kind words, information and encouragement has been given.
Thank you Miss one,
He called today. It was a difficult conversation. He wants me to come see him Asap! That ain't possible and he has to deal with that. With the emails stopped, I thought he would write a letter. I was shocked to get a call. But I'm standing firm.
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  #28  
Old 04-08-2019, 08:31 PM
RaeLR RaeLR is online now
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Amen. A man who has not dealt with his stuff is emotionally immature and can't be trusted to be there for you. A real man is thoughtful and considerate and you will feel valued and cared about. There will be no doubts in your mind and heart about where you stand. Booty pics can't take the place of the real thing!!!
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  #29  
Old 04-09-2019, 06:44 PM
BKQueen BKQueen is offline
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Amen. A man who has not dealt with his stuff is emotionally immature and can't be trusted to be there for you. A real man is thoughtful and considerate and you will feel valued and cared about. There will be no doubts in your mind and heart about where you stand. Booty pics can't take the place of the real thing!!!
Yes RaeLR,

So very true. He wanted the pics to trade and sell. I tried to get him to understand that I don't want him getting into any trouble. I get that everyone has to have a hustle behind the wall but come on, I don't want to be the reason he goes to the hole. He's like just do it and let me worry about it. Smh
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  #30  
Old 04-11-2019, 03:56 AM
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PinkMarshmallow PinkMarshmallow is offline
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Hello again BKQueen. I'm glad to hear you're standing firm and acting in a manner that is in your own best interests. If you put your energy into watching your own actions and reactions, you will eventually cease having any interest in him at all.
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  #31  
Old 04-11-2019, 10:34 AM
BKQueen BKQueen is offline
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Hello again BKQueen. I'm glad to hear you're standing firm and acting in a manner that is in your own best interests. If you put your energy into watching your own actions and reactions, you will eventually cease having any interest in him at all.
Thank you PinkMarshmallow, I am trying to stay strong. The good thing is I doubt he will call again anytime soon. I'm just taking it one day at a time.
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  #32  
Old 05-23-2019, 12:20 AM
Mejramkap Mejramkap is offline
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I just introduced myself a few days ago... But it was coming. He was being distant and no longer emailing everyday. He claimed it was because if lack of money. I only sent him once ($25) and because if whatever fees / fines / court cost he owes, he said "they" took most of it.

He later suggested that I could send money to his cellie and then he could at least get some commissary. I was not comfortable with doing it. He then suggested multiple other ways. Including me printing out "suggestive" pictures of women from Instagram. I did last week and he had nerves to complain today. I haven't heard from him in 4 days. His email was basically barking orders at me and was written like he was talking down to me! I haven't been able to visit him in 2/3 months and now he totally changed on me. He even now claims that even though he was able to trade / sell some if those pics, he won't be able to respond all like that because Trulinks is expensive.

I would have given him the benefit of doubt, but my gut instinct says NO. He could have written a letter. He could have sent word like he always has even though he didn't have money. What's changed? His emails these last few weeks have been like 2 sentences. So, I wrote him. Everything including his feelings and emotions are such a secret. Like damn, you can't answer how are you doing? Are you Ok? This is on top of straight ignoring questions about his only family - his cousin (female) and he doesn't want her in his business so he hasn't told her about me. When I complained about it, it's I'm starting a fake fight. Silent treatment. Now today it was I need to stop trying to rush things and let them play out???

But he loves me. Funny how his actions and words don't seem like love. So, I wrote him back and told him that I'm done. Whatever game he's playing, he's playing it without me. But then I cancelled / deleted Corrlinks. So, I don't veven know if he can get that email. Nevertheless my mind is made up. I'm not going to be someone's option. Now I'm really believing he started kissing me and then said I love you just to try to lay the foundation to start using me. And when he realized that I'm not just going to blindly follow whatever he says he decided to put me on ice. My heart is broken but I'm not going to let this break me. Wishing everyone that still has their MWI Relationship the best. It's Super Hard, but if he / she really loves you - Go Hard. But if they are showing you that they don't care or could careless...Please move on. 8 months in hurts but I rather have realized this now instead of later. Please save your heart the pain.

This reminds me of what I have recently been through. you deserve better. I thought he was the man for me until I discovered he was doing other women. despite all his promises. and thought his account on corrlinks was locked but no longer apparently. some believe that you do not know how it is. but the truth always comes to an end
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  #33  
Old 05-23-2019, 12:44 AM
Ohyesboo55 Ohyesboo55 is offline
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send money to his cellie?? send pics of other women? barking orders?? this is NOT love. I'm sorry
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  #34  
Old 05-30-2019, 07:59 PM
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MissOne MissOne is offline
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So familiar. I'm glad you saw what was in front of you.
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  #35  
Old 05-31-2019, 04:58 AM
BKQueen BKQueen is offline
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It's really hard. I am still in contact with him. The situation is on a different level now. We have to stand our ground in this life path. I still believe that we are in Love. I had to stand firm on what my boundaries are and what I will tolerate. We are working on our communication and getting along. We literally had to take a step back and reevaluate everything. We both were moving too fast in the negative direction. I'm not going to be used or be his enabler to bad behaviors. I walked away and he came running after me. I know in my heart that we both want this but we both have our issues. We agreed to work on them together. Love is not enough. I need a commitment to positivity. So far so good. But real change doesn't happen over night. One day at a time now, no fluffed up promises, fantasies and selfishness. In this, I have truly learned my worth and I'm adding tax.
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The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to BKQueen For This Useful Post:
lovinglife30 (06-16-2019), MizzyMuffling (05-31-2019)
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