Welcome to the Prison Talk Online Community! Take a Minute and Sign Up Today!






Go Back   Prison Talk > BREAK TIME > Continuing and Adult Education
Register Entertainment FAQ Calendar Mark Forums Read

Continuing and Adult Education Discuss college and continuing education.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 07-28-2014, 07:25 PM
CottonBall1122 CottonBall1122 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: United States
Posts: 91
Thanks: 30
Thanked 16 Times in 12 Posts
Default I hope this doesn't sound selfish. $$ question/career conflict

Hey everyone!
Not sure this is in the right section, but I'll give it a try!
So my boyfriend is in prison and he's going to be for a really really long time. (10 possibly more years).Im young and in college and im just starting to think of the future. I want to try and create something beautiful for the both of us and our future family (If it's in Gods will). Well, I was starting to think that working just wasn't for me. Not that im lazy or anything, but no career interests me. If any career does, it's Dermatology but i feel im too stupid and i'd get stressed out. 1 thing that doesn't stress me is Church and i wanted to possibly just work in the church helping people get close to God. well, that doesn't pay that much at all. And when my boyfriend comes home, I want him to come home to little stress and I know theres a huge possibility i'm going to be the provider. He tells me he wants to be, but i just know that cant happen with his record. he says he knows people that can get him into construction or something, but i don't trust that idea. But anyway, Im starting to think i should go to school to be a physician assistant. It would make a good salary and Id be able to provide for both of us until he gets back on his feet. The thing is, it's a LOTTTT of work and studying and competition. But i do have at least SOME interest in it. But my interest does lie more with the church. Im not thinking about making a lot of money for my own benefit, im thinking about the future of a family more so and having everyone taken care of and happy. I just don't know if the way im thinking is right or not and i REALLY hope i don't sound selfish. I was taught money isn't everything. But when you have a loved one that is incarcerated, I guess it kind of is part of it .Any advice would help. Thank you and God bless xoxo
Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
  #2  
Old 07-28-2014, 07:53 PM
HisBaby215's Avatar
HisBaby215 HisBaby215 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Florida, USA
Posts: 54
Thanks: 34
Thanked 38 Times in 22 Posts
Default

You said you're in college and talked about a few things, so obviously you have you're options. I doubt you're "too stupid", but if you really feel Dermatology would be too hard, I can definitely tell you a PA is so much more. You're right it is A LOT of studying. The $ might be good if you make it through, but then you're going to have a job you really don't like. And its going to be harder to get through school if you're not all that interested. Jmo..
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to HisBaby215 For This Useful Post:
David (07-29-2014)
  #3  
Old 07-28-2014, 08:24 PM
miamac's Avatar
miamac miamac is online now
Site Moderator Gone Mad on leave

Staff Superstar Winner PTO Site Moderator 

 

Join Date: May 2013
Location: ORnativeAZresCAtied
Posts: 10,885
Thanks: 14,645
Thanked 21,557 Times in 7,647 Posts
Default

Go with your passion. If that's leading folks spiritually, then the money will be there. I know a lot people don't feel that's true, but you sound like you lean that way and I'm with you.

A lot can happen in ten years and you need to be able to sustain your plan so that whatever circumstances you find yourself in, you feel confident that you're doing the right thing.

Pray about it, explore your options and go for it!
Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to miamac For This Useful Post:
David (07-29-2014), Wendy1918 (07-28-2014)
  #4  
Old 07-28-2014, 10:37 PM
xolady xolady is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: May 2014
Location: highlands, florida
Posts: 5,749
Thanks: 12,241
Thanked 5,983 Times in 3,114 Posts
Default

Your in college why not take the time and see an advisor who might be able to guide you in the right direction. Take some theology classes and really see if you want this as a career. There's nothing wrong with wanting to make enough money to build a life with someone but if your going to go to school for it make sure you really want it or have a calling as some would say. If he's going to be locked up for 10yrs or more you have plenty of time for figuring out what you want to do. Good luck!
Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to xolady For This Useful Post:
David (07-29-2014), sidewalker (07-29-2014)
  #5  
Old 07-29-2014, 12:44 AM
Psychocandy's Avatar
Psychocandy Psychocandy is offline
98% mean :)
Donation Award 
 

Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 2,211
Thanks: 1,580
Thanked 4,058 Times in 1,423 Posts
Default

Sadly in most cases you need to work to make money.
You will find something that you really love to do just dont put the financial part ahead of what really makes you happy.
__________________
Mrs Mroch
Just like the sunshine after rain
I'll come
To be with you will save the day
'Cos I know
When I'm with you again
You just steal my heart away


Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 07-29-2014, 01:27 AM
AnarchyHeart's Avatar
AnarchyHeart AnarchyHeart is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: CA
Posts: 1,619
Thanks: 975
Thanked 1,720 Times in 908 Posts
Default

I do some work in the dermatogy field. And here's one thing that always stuck out to me. Because like you there are times I don't feel like a full time gig is the right calling. But I'm sure you're familiar with MOHs surgery. Where you work on your own. So the stress is limited to the task on hand. It is the dermatology setting. And in the field of expertise that is greatly sought after. You can get licensed in specifically that area without to many additional courses. And the cool thing is, once you are licensed and certified in your field and area, there are many temp agencies that place you. So you can work full time, with one practice or many, or you can work for a bit and take time off when needed or desired. I go into many offices every week with my job and some of the top practices use temp agencies because of seasonal flow. You don't have the stressors of patients and you can have the flexibility for your schedule when you need time off for personal reasons. Not to mention that even as a temp the pay is good and you keep/gain professional references.
Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to AnarchyHeart For This Useful Post:
CottonBall1122 (07-29-2014), sidewalker (07-29-2014)
  #7  
Old 07-29-2014, 01:36 AM
AnarchyHeart's Avatar
AnarchyHeart AnarchyHeart is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: CA
Posts: 1,619
Thanks: 975
Thanked 1,720 Times in 908 Posts
Default

PS. About feeling stupid and getting stressed out... I was raised I had to be perfect. And then I grew up and realized if I tried my hardest I was already doing better than most. So if you try your best you will never be stupid. It's not possible. So many people don't even try and still make it. So by you being worried, you are setting yourself up to either do more, or do nothing. Please just realize you can do whatever it is you want to do, and then some.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 07-29-2014, 03:21 AM
mooshy's Avatar
mooshy mooshy is offline
weary
Donation Award 
 

Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: south east uk
Posts: 2,587
Thanks: 1,260
Thanked 1,850 Times in 1,020 Posts
Default

You sound young, idealistic, and a bit naive. None of which are negative things to be but unfortunately we all hit that point in life where reality kicks in and our fears about being in the big wide world have to be faced.

I doubt many people on here are doing the job they truly dreamed of, the person checking out your groceries does it because it pays the bills and keeps food on the table. I'm lucky in that I don't mind my job but it's hardly something I'm interested in but at least I get a lot of autonomy which suits me fine. Work is rarely a vocation, and more often than not a bloody big chore.

If you are one of the very lucky few who realises their dream job and makes a life doing it then that will be fantastic. But in the meantime remember the practicalities. And yes, that = $$$. Maybe your church calling could work alongside your job training? My friend had a wife and family so became a police officer, but his calling was very strong so he was a voluntary deacon at his church and ministered when and where he could. He believed his police work was part of the plan - a way to commit to a better society AND to reach people he would not have met in church.

I don't mean any harm or criticism, just some observations.
__________________
Off chocolate I am.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 07-29-2014, 04:53 AM
LillyVphoenix's Avatar
LillyVphoenix LillyVphoenix is offline
Spook's Lazy Butt
 

Join Date: May 2014
Location: Home is AZ/ my heart is in Tennessee
Posts: 1,444
Thanks: 271
Thanked 982 Times in 635 Posts
Default

this is a great time, i believe that you have lots of time to firgue out what you want to do, and get school, education out of the way. do it for your self and your future family, this is great. i know many girls whos men go in or they MWI and they wait 4 plus years or more or less and then time comes their man is getting out and they are stressing waiting til the last minute to get finances together and money. you have plenty of time to save up and get comfortable. i would do it, as far as what you want to do, i thin kits important to do something you believe in. i am lazy i feel the same way i dont really have much drive to do anything, im a musician,thats only if i get lucky i get paid but its ok i can afford to do that right now. and im happy. everyones situation is different. but do take advantage of the time apart. to better your self.
__________________
We're fearless, we're stupid, we're dealers, we're losers.
We're killers, we're orphans, we're addicts, we're stealers.
We're shooters so kill us. We are what they say we are until conformity hits us.

Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to LillyVphoenix For This Useful Post:
CottonBall1122 (07-29-2014)
  #10  
Old 07-29-2014, 05:11 AM
zephyrseas zephyrseas is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Vic Australia
Posts: 6
Thanks: 0
Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts
Default

When the guy is in for ten or more years you've easily a year to explore ultruistic work in a meaningful way where you will get a chance to grow up through what you'd see and do by going off and doing volunteer work abroad. You'd stop being lost and immature, aquire skills, surprise your self by what you'd do and give, plus it would be great for your C/V. You'd have no problems in deciding a future pathway on return. You could write to your inmate frequently who'd be better off having a fully developed friend rather than the year of visits by a lost unmotivated sheep.Were your inmate supportive of this kind if activity, your growth even if he felt it risked you'd move on from him would demonstrate he cares more for you to be happy, probably has real love of you as a person in your own right. Plus the smarts to know if your growing in doing this and still wanted to know him, he'd be dealing with a better woman and if his wife one day, a better future.
Many young women, not a wife with kids with an inmate, use the poor inmate as an excuse to avoid constructing a proper adult life because of their own deficiencies, preying on the inmates vulnerabilities and isolation via their sentence. They harm these men's potential growth more than help them unlike the positives from mature responsible partners.

I responded to this while it's years too late for this scenario, because there are often lots more of this kind of girl croping up. She who happily avoids her own life responsabilities to play with inmates. destructively.
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 07-29-2014, 05:30 AM
zephyrseas zephyrseas is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Vic Australia
Posts: 6
Thanks: 0
Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by LillyVphoenix View Post
this is a great time, i believe that you have lots of time to firgue out what you want to do, and get school, education out of the way. do it for your self and your future family, this is great. i know many girls whos men go in or they MWI and they wait 4 plus years or more or less and then time comes their man is getting out and they are stressing waiting til the last minute to get finances together and money. you have plenty of time to save up and get comfortable. i would do it, as far as what you want to do, i thin kits important to do something you believe in. i am lazy i feel the same way i dont really have much drive to do anything, im a musician,thats only if i get lucky i get paid but its ok i can afford to do that right now. and im happy. everyones situation is different. but do take advantage of the time apart. to better your self.
You've answered well. Advised well too.You have taken self responsability, know yourself well, honest with what and why you do live the way you do. Your ace, good for your guy to know. A mature adult who'd live this way regardless. No lost sheep. When I made my point earlier it was not meant to imply conventional careers were needed for all. Anyway artists are good different and must have confidence to do what they do.

You were a great example of this & worth pointing out years later.
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 07-29-2014, 09:03 AM
CottonBall1122 CottonBall1122 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: United States
Posts: 91
Thanks: 30
Thanked 16 Times in 12 Posts
Default

Thank you so much. This really helped me out. I've just been really stressing about what I should do. I already took 2 years off of school because when he got in there 2 years ago, I was just overwhelmed with everything and couldn't balance the emotional aspect of it and school. But now I'm more back in reality and I need to start moving. I saw being a physician assistant for dermatology was something that sparked my interest. But again, the competition and the work to get there really intimidates me and stresses me out. But medicine has always been interesting to me. But is it enough interest. And I just see this show called prison wives and allllll I've seen struggle financially and I don't want it to be like that. We have enough stress being apart. My only motivation is to be able to provide for my future family and make them happy and content. I was just raised in my faith as money isn't happiness and I'm not looking for it for myself, it's for others really. But I thought that was wrong too :/. So I should seek that career with dermatology?
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 07-29-2014, 09:26 AM
LillyVphoenix's Avatar
LillyVphoenix LillyVphoenix is offline
Spook's Lazy Butt
 

Join Date: May 2014
Location: Home is AZ/ my heart is in Tennessee
Posts: 1,444
Thanks: 271
Thanked 982 Times in 635 Posts
Default

I think seeking a career in dermatology is great! if thats what you want to do. you have plenty of time, but dont stay in neutral for to long, because we get comfortable in neutral if we are not established yet. yes money shouldn't be so important if thats how you were raised, but money is what we need to live, be comfortable. its already so damn hard as it is on us waiting out here, and them being in there, my bf he is my fuel , he's what keeps me going because i want better for us. i ask him to take care of him self and better him self in there and at the same time i better my self out here. time flies everything takes time.
__________________
We're fearless, we're stupid, we're dealers, we're losers.
We're killers, we're orphans, we're addicts, we're stealers.
We're shooters so kill us. We are what they say we are until conformity hits us.

Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 07-29-2014, 09:38 AM
LeBeau's Avatar
LeBeau LeBeau is offline
Registered User
Donation Award 
 

Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Oregon,at last!
Posts: 19,141
Thanks: 6,615
Thanked 23,024 Times in 7,142 Posts
Default

I've moved this thread here because it's about your education and career prospects rather than about prison.

Have you considered becoming an aesthetician?
Skin seems to be of special interest to you and as an aesthetician, you would have a fairly broad choice of work settings or work for yourself. (especially if you were to train as a massage therapist, too)
__________________

In memory of Mrs. Dragoness

Speak your mind-
Even if your voice shakes

Specializing in pest control- Site Exterminator.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 05:08 PM.
Copyright © 2001- 2017 Prison Talk Online
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Website Design & Custom vBulletin Skins by: Relivo Media
Message Board Statistics