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View Poll Results: Do You Worry That When Your LO Gets Out Whether They Will Go Back In?
NO!!! Def not this is their last chance and they won't screw it up 54 49.09%
I hope not but am preparing myself 14 12.73%
I prefer not to think about this 15 13.64%
Yes I'm afraid he/she WILL end up back in prison 18 16.36%
Yes and I've already made other plans if that happens 1 0.91%
I honestly don't know 8 7.27%
Voters: 110. You may not vote on this poll

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  #1  
Old 10-12-2015, 10:47 AM
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Default Do You Worry About Your LO Going Back to Prison?

Hey all my guy has 28 months left and though we talk about EVERYTHING I wonder how it'll be when he gets out and whether he'll be able to STAY out. He has a lot of obstacles to overcome...and we're taking it day by day.
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Old 10-12-2015, 11:44 AM
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My MWI is in for murder and I am not really worried about him doing that again but he said he was dealing drugs at the time. THAT I worry about. It will be difficult for him to get a job and frankly I struggle with that too. If we end up together, money is likely to be an issue. We both have food service experience though and that is a slightly more forgiving field when it comes to felons... of course, there are also more drugs so yeah... I worry about it. I even find myself paying attention here to what people say about the prison system in their state. I want to move somewhere that is more lax than Indiana just in case... *sigh* I don't share that thought with him of course...
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Old 10-12-2015, 01:00 PM
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Do I worry about it? Nope. There's no point in expending energy to worry about things I have no control over. I just accept it. My man has been in and out since we were kids (17 yrs old). He is who he is; and he does what he does. He knows the consequences of his actions; and he accepts them if/when he gets caught. I love him for who he is to me; and I accept him...all of him.
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Old 10-12-2015, 01:50 PM
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I dont worry about it we will cross that bridge when and if we come to it. I love him without any strings or threats Ill be there at his side if he goes back.
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Old 10-12-2015, 04:16 PM
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Originally Posted by Diamond Dez View Post
Do I worry about it? Nope. There's no point in expending energy to worry about things I have no control over. I just accept it. My man has been in and out since we were kids (17 yrs old). He is who he is; and he does what he does. He knows the consequences of his actions; and he accepts them if/when he gets caught. I love him for who he is to me; and I accept him...all of him.
That's a good way to look at it Diamond Dez. True, real love is about accepting the other...the good, bad and the ugly!
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Old 10-12-2015, 06:17 PM
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I don't believe he will go back as he is in for murder. Most inmates (I said most) do not commit murder again.

If he does, he is on his own....living a prison sentence is NOT an easy thing, and IMO it is selfish to do things you know can/will put you in back in prison...new charges or not.
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Old 10-12-2015, 07:32 PM
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I don't believe he will go back as he is in for murder. Most inmates (I said most) do not commit murder again.
This actually makes me feel better.
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Old 10-12-2015, 08:03 PM
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NO my husband will definitely not be going back to prison.
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Old 10-12-2015, 10:33 PM
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I highly doubt he'll ever go back. He's finally hit that point of fatigue - he wants nothing to do with that life anymore.

He hates when the guys he's in with sit around and talk about how they can't wait to get out so they can use again, blah blah. It blows his mind that they don't seem to realize that's the very thing that has them sitting behind bars right now!

And then he remembers that used to be him and his mind is blown again lol.

If he does go back, I can't say if I'd stay or not. I'm going to assume I probably wouldn't, considering how unlikely it was this time around.
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Old 10-13-2015, 02:06 AM
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If we can make it through this time I know for a fact that he'll never go back. The challenge is going to be keeping me out because of the anger problems I've developed due to this.
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Old 10-13-2015, 04:18 AM
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He told me that was the first time he screwed up and will be his last. But he just landed in the hole for 15 days (still in it) and I'm wondering if he can cope with being outside after 20+ years. Different dynamics out here than on the inside. I don't think he'll kill someone again but I'm not sure about him and this attitude "pushing the envelope" will help him. I'm mad at him because with this stuff he's screwing up his chances of release next year. But it's his life and he knows if he screws up again I'm gone. He's never been in trouble before he came to prison so I can only hope this will be his first and last time.
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Old 10-13-2015, 05:01 AM
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My son comes home soon, we talk about it all of the time, he tells me that he is never going back, but only time will tell, I believe him and if I do not believe in him, who will? Everyone else is thinking that he will, so I am all he has. If he does, it will be by himself as I am too old and tired of this ride to do it all again.
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Old 10-13-2015, 12:46 PM
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He is so sick and tired of being incarcerated that he has absolutely no intention of being caught up in anything that may lead him back there. He's now 12 years into his sentence, he's had a lot of time to think that over so I don't really think reoffending will be an issue. He's matured a lot, I can tell he's really chill now and enjoys simpler things rather than the fast life that got him there in the first place. He wants to relocate too so he doesn't have to deal with people he used to hang with. That alone tells me he's pretty much over it.
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Old 10-13-2015, 10:42 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by icj357 View Post
My son comes home soon, we talk about it all of the time, he tells me that he is never going back, but only time will tell, I believe him and if I do not believe in him, who will? Everyone else is thinking that he will, so I am all he has. If he does, it will be by himself as I am too old and tired of this ride to do it all again.
There was a woman (on staff) at the facility I worked who said she something like "oh he'll be back in 3 weeks" when I mentioned an inmate getting to go home soon. I thought that was horrible and told her so. Her response was "they're all like that." But here's the truth: 30% recidivism in first 6 months, 60% in 2 years. Even that two year mark has a good portion of success stories. Not enough, I'll grant you but to automatically assume someone will fail is really doing them a disservice. He is lucky to have you as a momma!
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Old 10-14-2015, 01:36 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sweetfla View Post
Hey all my guy has 28 months left and though we talk about EVERYTHING I wonder how it'll be when he gets out and whether he'll be able to STAY out. He has a lot of obstacles to overcome...and we're taking it day by day.
Im right with you my husband is out in 24..... soooo close but so far away lol I can't wait
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Old 10-14-2015, 06:28 PM
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Unfortunately frauding and so forth a "way of life" for my man so most likely he will in effect be -going back in, at some point. W e have discussed some things already pertauining to this matter and I am confident we can handle it together IF AND WHEN.
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Old 10-14-2015, 10:14 PM
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26 months before my Girl gets out
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Old 10-18-2015, 07:38 AM
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To be honest...because we will be much older when he gets out I don't fear this as much. I have had it cross my mind but I have dispelled it. I think he's making the positive changes to come home and stay home. I can't wait for him to come home!
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Old 10-19-2015, 06:21 AM
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Most every inmate in prison swears they will never go back.
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Old 10-19-2015, 09:11 PM
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I pretty confident that he won't be returning. He is in on a murder charge. Really, he helped a friend. Somebody died. He didn't kill anyone, and he's more than capable of taking care of himself and his family without resorting to criminal behavior.
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Old 10-23-2015, 02:44 PM
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He says he never wants to repeat this experience and has no desire to be a revolving door kind of guy. I don't doubt that but I worry how he will cope in the outside world as he has some obstacles to overcome. I know if he does go back due to more poor choices I will need to move ahead without him. He knows this too.
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Old 10-25-2015, 10:00 AM
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I do sometimes because he will be on parole and you can get sent back to prison for the smallest thing. Just for a traffic stop or being around illegal activity that you're not even involved in. So that sometimes makes me anxious I don't want to act like a parole officer once he gets home
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Old 10-26-2015, 02:08 PM
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LOL if I had a penny for everyone who ever said never!!!!
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Old 10-26-2015, 07:43 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MariaFairmaiden View Post
My MWI is in for murder and I am not really worried about him doing that again but he said he was dealing drugs at the time. THAT I worry about. ... I want to move somewhere that is more lax than Indiana just in case... *sigh* I don't share that thought with him of course...
Hoping for the best but preparing for the worst is evidence of a smart and caring woman.
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Old 05-15-2019, 02:05 AM
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No, I don't worry at all about him returning back to prison. He made it clear he's not going back! This is it for him.He realize being incarcerated isn't for him. He's seen a lot since being incarcerated. He ready for it to be finally over.
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