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  #4501  
Old 04-09-2019, 02:16 PM
noeliz4life noeliz4life is offline
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i am at my limit of missing him. i get crabby, miserable, hate everything and everyone, i get really snappy with him too... and that's when i know its time to book that flight again! then im ok for 2-3 months max. what. a. life.!! LOL
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  #4502  
Old 04-09-2019, 04:24 PM
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i am at my limit of missing him. i get crabby, miserable, hate everything and everyone, i get really snappy with him too... and that's when i know its time to book that flight again! then im ok for 2-3 months max. what. a. life.!! LOL
I wish I had the money to do that. I see him one weekend a year because I'm also in a different state than him and I'm disabled. My mom makes sure I see him once a year, that's about it.
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  #4503  
Old 04-10-2019, 06:35 PM
Kadeejah23 Kadeejah23 is offline
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Stay strong hun 2021 isn't that far away at all. These months are flying right now and 2019 is getting close to being out. I know it has to be tough for you. But if this the man you want to spend your life with, the little wait is definitely worth it at the end. It's a reason why y'all was meant to cross each other paths again. You got this strong woman.
Thank you so much! This is one of the most difficult situations I have ever been through. I would have never thought I would be doing this but I can't get over how we reconnected. I'll get through it. You are so sweet! I can't thank you enough for the encouragement!!
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  #4504  
Old 04-11-2019, 04:37 AM
Panda70 Panda70 is offline
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I miss my fiance every day thank god he only has 1 year and a half and 3 months is all most done. I see him 2 a week but i wish i could walk out those doors with him next to my side. Although i only live a half hour away from where he is. He calls me 4 times a day 3 of the calls we keep short but the one before bed is the longest. I also didn't think i would be going through this either but it is love we choose to stick with them through hard times and good times. The say in the bible for better or worse well can't get any worse than this at least i hope not. I repeat a couple of words out of country songs in my letters everyday ( Everything is going to be okay and never leave i love you left unsaid. )
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  #4505  
Old 04-20-2019, 02:52 PM
Sweetpea1998 Sweetpea1998 is offline
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I miss my sweetie every day. I love you so much baby.
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  #4506  
Old 04-20-2019, 03:08 PM
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I just miss him the moment we hang up the phone and we are lucky cause we get to talk a few times during the day. I can't wait to get over there already
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  #4507  
Old 04-23-2019, 12:07 AM
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Originally Posted by ben's girl View Post
Missing your man? And need to just let it out to people who understand? We all go through moments where we miss our guys and just don't have anyone on the outside who understands. Who better than the H/B PTO members to help you out during your difficult time.

So, if you are missing your man and need to get your thoughts off your chest, this is YOUR thread to do so.

Chin up, ladies. We'll get through this together.
Hello- so my boyfriend is seeming distant these days as he is nt engaging with me in any intimate conversation. Our phone calls feel awkward for us, and he can't say too much in letters because his Mom has to open them and text me a picture, I live with my parents who will not let him send letters to their house. So I just wrote him a letter and told him that I really think we need som meaningful connections, the way we have always done when he serves time. I want to say somethiing when he calls but I always chicken out and end up just respondiing to the stories he tells me about his time inside. I don't want to spend 3 more years not having intimate communications because it seemd like that will permanately damage our bond, especially our normally very passionate sexual bond. Maybe he'll respond to my letter positively or perhaps I'll finally just come out and tell him how I feel the next time he calls. Anyway, I tend to worry too much so I'm open to the reality that things aren't as bad as I imagine, and he did remind me the last time he called that he loves me more than he has ever loved anyone in his life, which was nice to hear I'll admit. I'd be very pleased right now with even the occasional loving gesture like that. So that's my current concern, thanks to anyone out there who reads this post. Take care
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  #4508  
Old 04-23-2019, 04:31 AM
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I know how you feel but I don't live with my mom. We don't talk like we should on the phone I talk in my letters to him. We have this we say everything is going to be alright and I love you. Those words are in a couple of country songs. I miss him so much. If you need to talk keep posting it on here we will talk to you
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  #4509  
Old 04-24-2019, 12:47 AM
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Well usually I don't post about how much I miss my Fiance' because I be thinking okay who don't but thank you PTO for letting me get it out. Okay here it goes. I miss my Fiance' so much. I wish he was home so my tears can stop hitting my pillow and instead they would hit his shoulder or he could wash them away before they fell at all. I wish he was here to tell me that everything will be okay and he will hold me as I mourn another family member's death. I wish he was here to comb my hair as I just lay down letting the tears fall. I have not been able to talk to him since April 3rd because TDCJ for some dumb reason said that they have an old number on file so I have to reregister my phone. How is that when I have had the same number for over a year and there has been no problem. Last night I stayed awake crying and missing him so bad that I made myself sick. Now that I am letting it out I am starting to feel a little bit better thanks.
I keep writing posts and never them once I send them off, what am I doing wrong? The answer to this question is yes, I really do miss my boyfriend, and I worry that he seems distant this time because he doesn't engage in the kind of intimate conversation that we have engaged in together in previous terms. I miss connecting romantically and I'm worried that by the tiime 3 more years are over, our sex life will be ruined. Does anybody else out there worry about intimacy? I did have him tell me on our last call that he loves me more than he has ever loved anyone in his life, which was sweet and thoughtful, but I just miss hearing he would love to make love to me again. So I wrote him a letter and layed it all on the line, and I hope that was the right thing to do, I don't want to overwhelm him with another one of my concerns. I miss him so much and love him dearly
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  #4510  
Old 04-24-2019, 01:08 AM
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I know how you feel but I don't live with my mom. We don't talk like we should on the phone I talk in my letters to him. We have this we say everything is going to be alright and I love you. Those words are in a couple of country songs. I miss him so much. If you need to talk keep posting it on here we will talk to you
Thanks for the response, I found it in a round about way because once I send off my posts I can never find them again for some reason. I am at least glad other people can find my posts and are responding with supportive feedback. I'm glad you and your boyfriend have a special way to write to each other and say you love each other. I definitely write it in many ways when I write, and I am very openly affectionate and loving, and my hope is that he returns the sentiment after reading that I miss hearing it. I'll keep updates coming on this thread as I learn more from him, and any input with words of encouragment will be greatly appreciated. Thanks so much
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  #4511  
Old 04-24-2019, 09:00 AM
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Thanks for the response, I found it in a round about way because once I send off my posts I can never find them again for some reason. I am at least glad other people can find my posts and are responding with supportive feedback. I'm glad you and your boyfriend have a special way to write to each other and say you love each other. I definitely write it in many ways when I write, and I am very openly affectionate and loving, and my hope is that he returns the sentiment after reading that I miss hearing it. I'll keep updates coming on this thread as I learn more from him, and any input with words of encouragment will be greatly appreciated. Thanks so much
Hi there! If you have trouble remembering where you have posted and/or relocating your posts, you can find them by going to your profile page (click on your own username in the upper right corner of any page you are currently on here; where it says "Welcome, sm.boewer" at the very top of the page) -- once you land on your profile page, click on the tab that 'Statistics': underneath there you will see 'Find all posts by sm.boewer' and when you click that, a page will open with a list of all posts you've ever posted on here

Another helpful hint: if you want more comments & advice to your specific situation (say, wondering about lack of intimacy which you have mentioned), you might want to venture outside of this Missing Your Man -chat thread, and instead maybe start your own thread in the main section of Husbands and Boyfriends in prison, HERE is a link. While it is perfectly fine to post in this current thread as well, generally you will get more comments pertaining to your situation when it is your own thread and not a chat thread

To start a new thread in any forum click the black button in the upper left corner of the forum that says 'New thread'

(Sending this to you via PM as well)
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  #4512  
Old 04-25-2019, 12:58 AM
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It was his birthday today. He wasn't able to get to the phone otherwise I would have heard from him. I haven't heard his voice since Saturday.
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  #4513  
Old 04-25-2019, 04:58 AM
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Thanks for the response, I found it in a round about way because once I send off my posts I can never find them again for some reason. I am at least glad other people can find my posts and are responding with supportive feedback. I'm glad you and your boyfriend have a special way to write to each other and say you love each other. I definitely write it in many ways when I write, and I am very openly affectionate and loving, and my hope is that he returns the sentiment after reading that I miss hearing it. I'll keep updates coming on this thread as I learn more from him, and any input with words of encouragment will be greatly appreciated. Thanks so much
There is a lot of country songs we had for each other more from him to me. My fiance has had two marriages and both weren't good. His first wife he has two kids one is 18 and the other is 17. The 18 year old has respect problems and has disowned his father because his father and grandma had rules for her house that he didn't like. The 17 year old lives with her mom out of state. The second marriage she just wanted the money he brought home every week. The song good girl he says is his song to me I changed everything with him. It also helps because we work construction sometimes together and we love the same things. I hear those songs we have and I cry. It's not easy to be away from him like this it's very hard. I had to go get help from my doctor I don't like taking pills. When he gets home I'm done taking them. Send me a message if you want to talk privately
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  #4514  
Old 05-04-2019, 11:08 AM
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My love works all day that he doesn't even get the opportunity to use the phone that much nowadays. It sucks! But he tries to call me when he can and able to get on the phone. But it can go on like that for an entire week and a couple of days before I would hear from him again. It's hard but I'm holding in there at least he's working and staying out of trouble. I'm so proud of him but at the same time sad that we can't have our phone time together.
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  #4515  
Old 05-04-2019, 07:47 PM
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There is a lot of country songs we had for each other more from him to me. My fiance has had two marriages and both weren't good. His first wife he has two kids one is 18 and the other is 17. The 18 year old has respect problems and has disowned his father because his father and grandma had rules for her house that he didn't like. The 17 year old lives with her mom out of state. The second marriage she just wanted the money he brought home every week. The song good girl he says is his song to me I changed everything with him. It also helps because we work construction sometimes together and we love the same things. I hear those songs we have and I cry. It's not easy to be away from him like this it's very hard. I had to go get help from my doctor I don't like taking pills. When he gets home I'm done taking them. Send me a message if you want to talk privately
Hi- I would love to talk privately but I'm still getting use to this forum and I don't know how to send a private message. Anyway, I have a new reason to feel worried, I missed 12 calls from my boyfriend over a two week period because my damn phone is stuck in silent mode and if I am not looking right at my screen, I don't realize I am receiving calls. I am saving up for a new phone, but in the meantime, he all of a sudden just quit trying and I'm worried he feels betrayed, or blown off, and now he's just distancing himself from me out of anger. I did have his mother explain the situation to him when he called her, so at least he knows it wasn't purposeful. I really miss him and feel very lonely at night before falling asleep and whenever I am driving for some reason. It's weird, the moment I get behind the wheel and start driving, my mind floods with memories of our 6 years together and I am overwhelmed by both love and loss. We use to spend a lot of time driving together and traveling around the state, so perhaps that is why the car is so difficult. Listening to music is an absolute no for me, any song will remind me of him and I end up in tears with mascera running down my face! So now I am super focused on what my phone is doing in case he calls but realistically, I can't stare at the screen all day long waiting for a call, so until I get a new one, it will be hit and miss. At least I can get messages to him through his mom, which helps. This is a hard situation having someone in prison you love, and I am grateful for the support of all of you women who are great examples of how to remain strong. They need us to hold it together out here because survival on the inside is a full time job, at least in the prison my boyfriend is in. It's very old, no programs, and daily racial violence to watch out for. I am learning that the best way for me to support him in there, is to remain secure, self-reliant and stable out here. He just can't be responsible for ensuring my mental health and well-being and it isn't personal, it's just how it is right now, but he does what he can when he calls to say I love you. Thanks for the great insight and feedback
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  #4516  
Old 05-04-2019, 08:06 PM
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My love works all day that he doesn't even get the opportunity to use the phone that much nowadays. It sucks! But he tries to call me when he can and able to get on the phone. But it can go on like that for an entire week and a couple of days before I would hear from him again. It's hard but I'm holding in there at least he's working and staying out of trouble. I'm so proud of him but at the same time sad that we can't have our phone time together.
I can so relate to what you are going through, as I often have to wait a week or more for my boyfriend to get on a phone. Sometimes it's as much as a month if they are on lockdown due to racial violence and riots on the yard. Then I don't hear from him and have to worry about his safety on top of all of my other worries. I agree that that phone time makes such a difference and just hearing his voice puts my mind at ease. I am so gled for this forum and having a place to talk about things that most people can't relate to, and usually have judgements about it that aren't very nice either. Most people I talk to about it can't understand how I can stay with someone in prison, and feel I am settling for less, but I disagree obviously. He has many amazing qualities but does stupid things when he relapses on heroin. Everytime he gets busted for some type of pety theft, burglary tools or the last time stealing a car and stripping it, very stupid when he's high and hopefully he's learned his lesson finally. This time out I will have my own boundaries as I have been going to NarAnon meetings and won't be enabling a drug habit the way I always have, I hope! Sorry to write so much, thanks for caring
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  #4517  
Old 05-04-2019, 09:11 PM
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I can so relate to what you are going through, as I often have to wait a week or more for my boyfriend to get on a phone. Sometimes it's as much as a month if they are on lockdown due to racial violence and riots on the yard. Then I don't hear from him and have to worry about his safety on top of all of my other worries. I agree that that phone time makes such a difference and just hearing his voice puts my mind at ease. I am so gled for this forum and having a place to talk about things that most people can't relate to, and usually have judgements about it that aren't very nice either. Most people I talk to about it can't understand how I can stay with someone in prison, and feel I am settling for less, but I disagree obviously. He has many amazing qualities but does stupid things when he relapses on heroin. Everytime he gets busted for some type of pety theft, burglary tools or the last time stealing a car and stripping it, very stupid when he's high and hopefully he's learned his lesson finally. This time out I will have my own boundaries as I have been going to NarAnon meetings and won't be enabling a drug habit the way I always have, I hope! Sorry to write so much, thanks for caring
Hun never apologize it's fine and you're welcome. Sometimes others want to judge of us on the decision we make. But this how I feel about it you like what you like and love who you love. Everyone comes with some sort of baggage. It takes the right person to come along and be more accepting and willing to be with you as you are. I've found it to be better to talk to people that understand my choice better instead talking to someone that doesn't. Have to grow thicker skin with folks!!! I'm hoping your love gets it right and stay out of trouble as well. Glad to find someone that can relate. keep your head up hun be strong and take good care of yourself Queen.
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  #4518  
Old 05-05-2019, 08:12 AM
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Hi- I would love to talk privately but I'm still getting use to this forum and I don't know how to send a private message.
Hey - the way to send a private message to another member is to just click on their username (in this thread for example): a window opens up with several choices for what to do, one of which says "send a private message to X". Alternatively, when you are on your own profile page, click on "User CP" in the upper left corner of your page --> you will see your Control Panel appearing on the left hand side, scroll down there and you will come across Private Messages and the option Send New Message. Once you click that a message window opens up, and you can start typing the name of the recipient in the "Recipient Username(s)" field.

I've sent you couple of private messages myself in order to offer you advice for navigating this forum, it appears you have read them --- please feel free to contact any of the staff (with colored usernames) with other questions you might have

Also as a friendly reminder: you have your own thread about the issues you are going through in your relationship, a link to that thread HERE.
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Old 05-15-2019, 11:36 AM
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My baby has been in lockup the last 3 days because of some stuff his cellie did and I just miss him so much. I know that stuff like this happens but I just miss his voice. I need a hug
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Old 05-19-2019, 07:55 PM
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He is in transit. I got to speak to him for 2 min yesterday to know he is ok. Today nothing as they prepare for tomorrow. This new place is 6 1/2 hrs away. It has me a tad bit bummed out because it adds 2 hrs of travel each way.

Big plus is that he will have a stove and a refrigerator to use, so he can cook healthier meals.

He is so hungry that all he wants is chicken and coffee. The 2 months all he had was state food and easily dropped over 20 pounds.

I hope it is a decent place and he sees a counselor quickly to get his work release application in.

I miss him so much. The last 2 months haven't been the easiest. We will get into a new routine and figure out our next steps.

Still wish he could come home this year, but also God has other plans.
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Old 05-20-2019, 12:06 AM
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This resonates with me a lot today, so I’ll post. My hubby got transferred a month ago to begin his parole violation sentence. He was in receiving for 57 days it was horrendous on us both. We’ve had a major adjustment this time becuz well 1-he should’ve never caused this result, it’s been extremely hard emotionally on us both. His guilt is eating him alive. I’ve forghven & accepted. But 2-his moods have been a lot to handle & he got outta pocket last week while I was OMW to see him so I turned around and went home. Didn’t answer his calls for 3 days... were finally back on track tonight and it feels so much better. Aside from all my other shit going on, I needed him back to normal, it makes life easier. I cried SO MUCH this last 2 weeks I was a hot mess. I love him SO MUCH, and this stint is gonna be rough. Our second and LAST. But a long way to go. He’s in a higher security facility and is only out 2 hours a day. The phones are insane. 8 for 150 inmates, only an hour so that’s 16 calls. He calls every day but it’s only for like 5 min. I really need a 30 minute to just lay and talk and have some phone sex.... :-) but tonight im really feeling warm and fuzzies and so in love.... and I miss him so much. Buying a new house without him is so depressing. Hope you ladies are well, and I’m so glad for this site and support to vent, feel understood and never judged. XO Sweet dreams all
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Old 05-24-2019, 03:48 PM
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My man is currently in the process of being moved to a minimum and I havenít heard from him since Wednesday morning(which I realize wasnít that long ago) but it feels so weird to go from talking to him everyday and seeing him every other weekend and now hardly hearing from him. I miss and love him a lot and I just want to hear that wonderful voice of his soon.
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Old 05-24-2019, 05:14 PM
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My man is currently in the process of being moved to a minimum and I havenít heard from him since Wednesday morning(which I realize wasnít that long ago) but it feels so weird to go from talking to him everyday and seeing him every other weekend and now hardly hearing from him. I miss and love him a lot and I just want to hear that wonderful voice of his soon.
I feel you girl. Hopefully when he settles in at the minimum he will be able to call even more!!
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Old 05-24-2019, 11:05 PM
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so my boyfriend did about 5 months in Florence & 2 weeks ago today he was moved to FCI Phoenix. i had to find out because he missed a day of calling home. i checked the next day & it told me he was here at the Phoenix location. itís been two weeks since iíve heard from him. no call or mail so iím worried and just hoping heís doing okay/safe. iím so used to his calls every day & now nothing. i called the last place he was at & they were also helpful locating him for me and letting me know his $ from commissary would be transferred over to the new facility. but it could take up to 30 days before it would be added to the new location. hardest part is not really having anyone to fully understand what iím going through. i have my family who have been supportive but his family seems to care less about anything. this is his first doing time in prison, so this is all new for the both of us. after reading through everyoneís posts i know iím not the only one going through this.

i donít know anything about the place. i was told by a few family/friends that i probably wonít hear from him till heís settled in. i called the facility and they keep telling me everything is on the website and just have to wait till he contacts me. i donít know how true any of what my friend or family member has said. iím just missing him and hoping/praying i hear from him soon.
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Old 05-25-2019, 01:07 AM
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Originally Posted by Cookzter View Post
so my boyfriend did about 5 months in Florence & 2 weeks ago today he was moved to FCI Phoenix. i had to find out because he missed a day of calling home. i checked the next day & it told me he was here at the Phoenix location. itís been two weeks since iíve heard from him. no call or mail so iím worried and just hoping heís doing okay/safe. iím so used to his calls every day & now nothing. i called the last place he was at & they were also helpful locating him for me and letting me know his $ from commissary would be transferred over to the new facility. but it could take up to 30 days before it would be added to the new location. hardest part is not really having anyone to fully understand what iím going through. i have my family who have been supportive but his family seems to care less about anything. this is his first doing time in prison, so this is all new for the both of us. after reading through everyoneís posts i know iím not the only one going through this.

i donít know anything about the place. i was told by a few family/friends that i probably wonít hear from him till heís settled in. i called the facility and they keep telling me everything is on the website and just have to wait till he contacts me. i donít know how true any of what my friend or family member has said. iím just missing him and hoping/praying i hear from him soon.
Iím so sorry youíre going thru this! I hope heís able to contact you soon! The struggle is real, be strong and remember this is temporary!
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corcoran state prison, determination, fiance, georgia, husband in prison, husbands & boyfriends, jail, love, missing him, satf, wilcox, young

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