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Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison For everyone who has a husband, boyfriend or male partner incarcerated.

View Poll Results: Is your man just using you?
No,I know he loves me 337 89.39%
He only pays attention to me when he needs things 15 3.98%
He always needs money & favors or sex,then leaves 12 3.18%
family & friends say he's using me but they are liars 21 5.57%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 377. You may not vote on this poll

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  #101  
Old 03-18-2013, 06:14 PM
HarlemsHart HarlemsHart is offline
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^^^ What she said.
I have my fair share of friends in Prison, so I get the "friend" side of it because they have no reason to lie to me, Im just a friend. One friend of mine is talking to 5 women, and he tells them all the same story so that he can get money. Some men, have all these women sending them money so when theyre free their books are nice and fat and are sent home with a nice pocket of change. You really just have to pay attn to the signs. I think everyone situtation is unique and different but you honestly just have to pay attn.
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  #102  
Old 05-05-2013, 10:36 PM
Since120208 Since120208 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HarlemsHart View Post
^^^ What she said.
I have my fair share of friends in Prison, so I get the "friend" side of it because they have no reason to lie to me, Im just a friend. One friend of mine is talking to 5 women, and he tells them all the same story so that he can get money. Some men, have all these women sending them money so when theyre free their books are nice and fat and are sent home with a nice pocket of change. You really just have to pay attn to the signs. I think everyone situtation is unique and different but you honestly just have to pay attn.
So what do you think the signs are?
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  #103  
Old 05-05-2013, 10:44 PM
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Miss_A Miss_A is offline
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Is he just using me? Duh! Of course he is!
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  #104  
Old 05-08-2013, 01:49 AM
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Sleepyslady Sleepyslady is offline
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I feel like he is :/ Im not gonna send him money or books anymore, if he doesnt like it then he really doesnt love me as much as he says he does
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  #105  
Old 05-08-2013, 01:56 AM
NGS_lAdY NGS_lAdY is offline
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Originally Posted by Sleepyslady View Post
I feel like he is :/ Im not gonna send him money or books anymore, if he doesnt like it then he really doesnt love me as much as he says he does
Aw, that sucks I'm sorry you feeling that way. If you don't want to send him money or books anymore than you should stop doing it and if he really does love you than he should understand.

Maybe you are just feeling unappreciated by him rather than feeling "used".

Best of luck.
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  #106  
Old 05-08-2013, 02:13 AM
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Sleepyslady Sleepyslady is offline
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Originally Posted by a&jalways View Post
Aw, that sucks I'm sorry you feeling that way. If you don't want to send him money or books anymore than you should stop doing it and if he really does love you than he should understand.

Maybe you are just feeling unappreciated by him rather than feeling "used".

Best of luck.
Thanks no hes appreciative we just have history and
im scared to do too much for him.
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  #107  
Old 05-18-2013, 05:01 PM
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bienb bienb is offline
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i had a similar post and i know your trouble i wish i was as sure as other girls here, but as you said some people are better at fooling than others. I still sometimes have worries and im afraid to relax. i know that is not the way to go on this journey but i have many mean people around me. What I have realized is that people, even your closest ones are jealous of the love you have for each other. Many of them know deep inside that if they are in the same situation as your man, they wouldnt have some girl being there for them and that hurts their ego, so they say stuff to break you. my man will be there for at least 4ys, one has pased. First, his best friend told me he is just using me. He said that based on my boyfriend past relationship experiences. We have talked about it and he said all his friends are not really his true friends. after a year, im pretty sure he is right. He is a great man, very considerate. never done anything to hurt me, always there to talk, solve things out. my advice to you is to talk to him about it and watch very closesly how he reacts, what he says. if you look very intensly you can spot a liar. if not your relationship will grow and you will love him even more than you already do.
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  #108  
Old 07-08-2013, 10:34 PM
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Challenger Challenger is offline
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Wink He's not using me

I know my man not using me we were together before he went in and now that he's there I send him $100 a month. He don't ask me for money I send it cause I know it's hard in prison and it would be harder for him if he couldn't get the things he want and need. Just to give him a little comfort.
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  #109  
Old 07-28-2013, 01:11 AM
1991court 1991court is offline
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I don't know how to answer this question because I don't know what the truth is.. Background history is that him and I were together in the past got into a huge fight went separate ways, in December we reconnected. January 2013 I was so excited to have him back in my life (first love) but then I learned things that he was using drugs and doing things that I totally disagree with but thinking I could help him I stayed by him.. end of January he stole my car and took it on a High Speed Police Chase. He ended up in a Jail about 1 hour and 30 mins away from my home.. In may I got a letter from him apologizing like crazy.. So we started writing..

Now its the end of July and I just received a letter form him after a visit a week ago, at the visit he said "I Love You". in this letter he talks about how he has avoided saying those words to anyone else, that he says them out of Habit for his mom (strained relationship) that he has only ever said those words to his son knowing the full extent of those words for his child, but for know one else..

I am still in love with him, but I have been hurt by him in the past.. I don't know if he is going to hurt me again, I don't know if this is just because he literally only has 3 people in his life (mom, son, me), I don't know if he is being sincere.. He has asked for money but when I say I can't afford it right now he is ok with that..

I don't know, if he is just using me or if he really does love me.
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  #110  
Old 08-03-2013, 07:40 PM
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lullabys lullabys is offline
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Default How do you know?

I want to believe he's not using me. He doesn't ask me for money or anything. He calls me with his own money, but I do spend money on him during visits (once or twice a month) for food. I do worry that he's using me to pass the time. He used to write twice a week and call twice a day. Now he writes once a week and calls once a day. I cant tell if I'm smart to question his love or just damaged. He tells me every day how much he loves me, but I can't get out of my head all of the stories I hear about men in prison using women for companionship. Some days I'm more secure than others. But really.... How do you know? I really want to believe him. I'd be lying if I said i wasn't afraid things will change when he gets home. I'd never tell him that, but I'm so nervous.
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