Being eligible for drug court AGAIN?

Abjnj123 · #1 02-01-2020, 12:54 PM

My s/o finished up a 5 year bid that could of been 1 but because of continuing to use drugs, turned into 7...

He’s back on drugs and hating life...

We’ve joked about him getting arrested again for possession just so he’s forced into rehab ( because he keeps leaving / no willnpower) and courts are the only thing that forced him clean eventually ..

So my question is - if you’ve been on drug court in the past - failed out and eventually maxed out..

Could you be eligible for drug court AGAIN on new charges? Never had any violent charges... just drug related stuff he finished in the past..

Straight · #2 02-01-2020, 01:05 PM

You cannot force someone to rehab. If he doesn't want to get clean on the streets, he won't get clean in prison.

The courts clearly did not force him clean.

Everyone wants the prison to do what they cannot - make their LO rehab. then they want to get mad at the prison for not running their LO through a big Rehab-O-Matic out in back of the prison and send you back a clean, sober person who wants to work all day and stay home all night.

It just doesn't work like that.

Abjnj123 · #3 02-01-2020, 01:09 PM

So I def said that WE meaning both he and I consider this option because he says himself his willpower is not there unless forced and moving back to our old town where he used for years caused his relapse after 2 years..

HE wants to get locked up so he’s forced to get clean..

Straight · #4 02-01-2020, 03:04 PM

And again, that doesn't work. Isn't that what already failed?

You cannot force someone to get or stay clean. If you could do that, then YOU could do that to him.

You can't, prison can't, Oprah can't, the Pope can't... the only one that can make himself clean is him, and he has far more options available to him as resources on the street than he has in prison.

Ms Sunny · #5 02-01-2020, 04:18 PM

It would be at the judge’s discretion.

yourself · #6 02-01-2020, 07:28 PM

You should start going to al anon and narc anon so that you can deal with his addiction.

He may be able to get clean in prison, but he will not stay clean. Chances are, he wasn't all that clean in prison since most drugs are available there, not just on the streets. I kinda assume that that is part of the reason he maxed out.

Judges look at the offense, the offense history, his history in jail and any court ordered rehab, and make a decision that way. This does not mean he will get clean or stay clean. It will not motivate him to sobriety.

As an example, my brother has been doing the addiction dance with the courts for more than 30 years. He will do just enough rehab to get the jail credit or get parole off his back and then he is right back there, smoking, snorting, drinking (his preferred cocktail is alcohol, pot, and coke). He does not want to get sober. Every time in front of the judge, he says exactly what he needs to to get programming. He then does just the bare minimum necessary to get the credits so he can get out and back to using. When my parents were alive, he told them exactly what they wanted to get their hopes up that this time he was serious about getting clean and sober. It was all bullshit.

He needs to quit blaming a weak will and decide. If he is hating life, he needs to commit himself to getting clean and sober. Temptation will ALWAYS be there. Always. If he cannot stomach a bit of temptation, he will never be successful at maintaining any level of sobriety. He needs to actually develop the tools to deal with temptation and cravings. He can do it in prison, or outside of prison. There are more options to find a program that fits his needs outside.

But the fact of the matter is you can help him by doing some Al Anon and Narc Anon - the support groups (free) for people who love alcoholics or addicts.

He has to find it in himself to get clean and embrace sobriety or he will never be out of the prison system. My brother has 30 years with that dance. Your LO can decide if that is what he wants for life, or if he wants to do something different. If he wants to do something different, he needs to come up with a plan, investigate available rehabs, and take an active role in getting clean and sober.

Abjnj123 · #7 02-01-2020, 08:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Straight

And again, that doesn't work. Isn't that what already failed?

You cannot force someone to get or stay clean. If you could do that, then YOU could do that to him.

You can't, prison can't, Oprah can't, the Pope can't... the only one that can make himself clean is him, and he has far more options available to him as resources on the street than he has in prison.

This isn’t a Naranon or alanon post - it’s not what made him fail it’s what had him succeed last time.

Abjnj123 · #8 02-01-2020, 08:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by yourself

You should start going to al anon and narc anon so that you can deal with his addiction.

He may be able to get clean in prison, but he will not stay clean. Chances are, he wasn't all that clean in prison since most drugs are available there, not just on the streets. I kinda assume that that is part of the reason he maxed out.

Judges look at the offense, the offense history, his history in jail and any court ordered rehab, and make a decision that way. This does not mean he will get clean or stay clean. It will not motivate him to sobriety.

As an example, my brother has been doing the addiction dance with the courts for more than 30 years. He will do just enough rehab to get the jail credit or get parole off his back and then he is right back there, smoking, snorting, drinking (his preferred cocktail is alcohol, pot, and coke). He does not want to get sober. Every time in front of the judge, he says exactly what he needs to to get programming. He then does just the bare minimum necessary to get the credits so he can get out and back to using. When my parents were alive, he told them exactly what they wanted to get their hopes up that this time he was serious about getting clean and sober. It was all bullshit.

He needs to quit blaming a weak will and decide. If he is hating life, he needs to commit himself to getting clean and sober. Temptation will ALWAYS be there. Always. If he cannot stomach a bit of temptation, he will never be successful at maintaining any level of sobriety. He needs to actually develop the tools to deal with temptation and cravings. He can do it in prison, or outside of prison. There are more options to find a program that fits his needs outside.

But the fact of the matter is you can help him by doing some Al Anon and Narc Anon - the support groups (free) for people who love alcoholics or addicts.

He has to find it in himself to get clean and embrace sobriety or he will never be out of the prison system. My brother has 30 years with that dance. Your LO can decide if that is what he wants for life, or if he wants to do something different. If he wants to do something different, he needs to come up with a plan, investigate available rehabs, and take an active role in getting clean and sober.

I appreciate it but I despised the Naranon / alanon approach. I attend Smart / Craft method which I agree with much much more & statistically has better success rates..

yourself · #9 02-01-2020, 08:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Abjnj123

I appreciate it but I despised the Naranon / alanon approach. I attend Smart / Craft method which I agree with much much more & statistically has better success rates..

Then use it. Use it to help set limits and figure out what is him speaking v. What is his addiction speaking.

Sounds like he needs a lot of resiliency training if willpower is his big issue. Might want to find a program commensurate with the approach you are taking, his resiliency issue, and get a commitment from him with a bit of tough love mixed in that he will give such a rehab a specific amount of time, along with an agreement that he will do OTC UAs while he is with you.

And remind him - lots of people fail rehab, and fail it something like 8 times before getting sober. 8 should not be his goal, but it is a process, and a part of the process.

Btw, getting clean in prison is not fun, nor medically all that helpful. And the rehab offerings are usually 12 step based.

NJDevil5 · #10 06-23-2020, 06:04 AM

Actually, the jails and prisons should be doing more to help addicts recover. It's been all over the news about how the state is pushing Medication Assisted Treatment for incarcerated addicts. Individuals suffering from addiction should not have to detox after arrest. They should be offered a medically (including medication) supervised treatment. Generally the treatment includes Methadone, Buprenorphine or Naltrexone (Suboxone) along with intense therapy. And this treatment should follow the individual into release. Nobody should have to suffer through detox and face the prospect of turning back to drugs upon release. I would be curious to hear about any experiences about addicted persons entering the justice system.