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Met While Incarcerated Were you introduced by a friend or family member after he/she was incarcerated? Did you meet as Pen Pals? This Forum is for you!

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  #26  
Old 06-08-2019, 08:25 AM
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I hope not just right now... stop talking to him altogether. This guy is a real ass and I hope you'll move on. I also have a gut-feeling you're not the only one for him... he's a player... or so it seems... Sorry this happened to you but this was cruel on his part. Move on!!
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Old 06-08-2019, 08:40 AM
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I feel like taking me off his list was extreme and I honestly donít think I want to deal with him after he did that.

I donít understand what the purpose was when 3 days later you want to reach out and tell me you love me.
I love him but I donít want to talk to him right now.
His purpose? To groom you. To play the hot/cold game with you so that you will feel exasperated yet drawn to him as he's been able to manipulate you to think deep down he's a good guy.

I must agree with what Mizzy said....for your own sake I hope you never speak to this guy again. If you feel you love him after a) knowing he uses multiple women for support and b) he treats you like trash.....maybe it would be a good idea to speak to a therapist and find out why you connect this kind of behavior to love and are considering going back for more (if you are).

I am sorry that you came across this jerk's path, but all the warning signs were there from the beginning, based on what you've shared. You decide what you do with your life but I'd leave him with his other ladies and move forward.
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  #28  
Old 06-08-2019, 12:07 PM
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but all the warning signs were there from the beginning, based on what you've shared.
Yup.
He did you a favor by blocking you first. Probably the only one you'll get from him. Accept it and move on.
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  #29  
Old 06-08-2019, 12:35 PM
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You questioned his intentions, his morals and he got caught running a game. He is now punishing you for being smart enough to sniff out the BS. He will play the victim. He is not a helpless poor soul.

Red flags were waving in the background and now they are in front of your face. Your life, your choices but you are being duped.

Next he will curse you out and make it feel like it is your fault.
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  #30  
Old 06-08-2019, 01:15 PM
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You already was aware of what this man had going on already! The warning signs and the red flags was already showing. You shouldn't of never got yourself involved with him in the first place. Because he doesn't want anything at all..you see how he's using multiple women and doesn't have a problem using women to get what he need/want. He was grooming you since day one and he had his own little way of doing it. Trust me when he took you off his visitation list he did that for a reason. He ignored you for a reason. This dude probably already grooming someone else new. He can't get anything from you that can benefit him financially. Even though he can't benefit anything from you in that way. It doesn't stop him trying to benefit in a different way. By playing on your vulnerability. You don't need this walk away and cut your lose with this one. You already felt hurt that should be enough for you to see this man is only playing mind games with you. You see how he has been acting towards you that should be way more than enough to see a lot of BS surrounding this man.. If he could do all of that to you! It shows he isn't apologetic at all. This is a way to pull you back in so he can do the same to you again. His intentions was never TRUE and he has never been TRUE or GENUINE. He doesn't love you and he never has loved you. That's a easy words to tell you (he tell's all the women he has groom this without any meaning) and make you believe that he did love you. That's apart of the game the dude is very manipulative and a serial womanizer. You don't want to be with nobody like that at all. Stop talking to him all together and don't look back. It's time to move on and learn from all of this! You already knew what it would be like or how it would end for you. Don't continue to put yourself through it though...stuff like this shouldn't be swept under the rug or ignored. A man that can manipulate women is a man you don't want in your life at all. Once he's in your head..it's hard to get him out of your head. It's like having mind control over you and your emotions. So you could do a whole lot better! Block him, ignore him and move on with your life!
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  #31  
Old 06-08-2019, 05:23 PM
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He has shown you his true colors over and over again. He is a womaniser ,a user a manipulator and an all round ass.
What more do you need to know, to him you were just another woman to use.He couldnt get you to provide money so he cut ties.

I think you dodged a bullet I would get well away and stay away
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Old 06-10-2019, 11:46 PM
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He has been sending me emails for the past few days asking me to forgive him. He says he loves me and he wants to make it up to me. I ignored him for a while but I responded to one of his emails and told him I don’t want to be with him. He keeps asking me to forgive him. He told me he knows he’s messed up but he really loves me. He’s not getting anything out of me so I’m not sure why he’s begging like this. I just don’t want to be bothered with this right now. I love him but I just want to focus on me.
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  #33  
Old 06-11-2019, 12:18 AM
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He has been sending me emails for the past few days asking me to forgive him. He says he loves me and he wants to make it up to me. I ignored him for a while but I responded to one of his emails and told him I don’t want to be with him. He keeps asking me to forgive him. He told me he knows he’s messed up but he really loves me. He’s not getting anything out of me so I’m not sure why he’s begging like this. I just don’t want to be bothered with this right now. I love him but I just want to focus on me.
This reminds me of an old joke...A narcissist and a sociopath walk into a bar...
Do really expect someone to come on here and confirm that he adores you and that is why he is messaging you?

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  #34  
Old 06-11-2019, 03:42 AM
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He has been sending me emails for the past few days asking me to forgive him. He says he loves me and he wants to make it up to me. I ignored him for a while but I responded to one of his emails and told him I donít want to be with him. He keeps asking me to forgive him. He told me he knows heís messed up but he really loves me. Heís not getting anything out of me so Iím not sure why heís begging like this. I just donít want to be bothered with this right now. I love him but I just want to focus on me.
I'm sorry. I have been a little harsh with you. Everyone wants to be loved for who they are, not for just what they provide. And this man will never have anything but contempt, for those who condone his game. And you did. Nor does this man want to join any club that would want to have him as a member. And you do. You need something from him, he cannot give. The die is cast. It was already set up that way by both of you. And you know it. This isn't about love. It's about validation and winning.
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  #35  
Old 06-11-2019, 03:14 PM
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FOCUS ON YOU, YOU, YOU AND YOU!!!!!!!! When a man no longer has control and loses control over you and the entire situation. He'll do all sorts of things and say all sorts of things to try to gain CONTROL AGAIN! He's the controlling type..girl you just saved yourself a lot of BS and missed the BIGGEST missile of your life!! Love isn't supposed to come with strings attached to your heart to control your heart (you) as a puppet. You don't need no one that wants to have the upper hand! That wants to have full control over how he wants to do things, how he wants to mistreat you and hurt you. He's controlling and manipulative. You can do BETTER and you deserve BETTER!!!
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  #36  
Old 06-11-2019, 09:34 PM
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He has been sending me emails for the past few days asking me to forgive him. He says he loves me and he wants to make it up to me. I ignored him for a while but I responded to one of his emails and told him I donít want to be with him. He keeps asking me to forgive him. He told me he knows heís messed up but he really loves me. Heís not getting anything out of me so Iím not sure why heís begging like this. I just donít want to be bothered with this right now. I love him but I just want to focus on me.
He was doing hot and cold on you to teach you a lesson- he took his attention and affection away abruptly so youíd be like an addict and cone begging for it back, and possibly start sending money etc so you didnít lose his affection again.
You played him by not doing that lolol- he thought he had you hooked enough, but he overplayed his hand.
Good work- now stay away from him
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  #37  
Old 06-11-2019, 11:33 PM
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One possible reason he took you off his visitation list is so you wouldn’t show up unannounced and mess up a visit with one of his other women. And you did show up unannounced, so he may be glad he took that precaution. It may be that for the time being he’s had his fill of the other woman and is now ready to talk to you again, hence the attempts to contact you. And, he’s full of remorse now because he knows exactly what he did to you.
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  #38  
Old 06-11-2019, 11:52 PM
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I know other women visit him. He tells me. He says thatís not the reason. He said that I threatened him with messing things up for him. Which is true I did do that. We got into an argument the last week we talked and I told him if I found out he was lying to me I was going to mess it up for him. He told me he got scared cause he knows when Iím mad Iím hot tempered. I mean I can get crazy sometimes so I kinda get it if thatís the real reason but iím not fully convinced. I really donít know what to think. I think he thought I was going to act crazy when I found out he took me off the list but I actually did the opposite. I left him alone. Maybe thatís why now heís tripping because he knows iím Hot headed so me being this calmed and quiet is not what he was expecting. I guess sooner or later the truth will come out.

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One possible reason he took you off his visitation list is so you wouldnít show up unannounced and mess up a visit with one of his other women. And you did show up unannounced, so he may be glad he took that precaution. It may be that for the time being heís had his fill of the other woman and is now ready to talk to you again, hence the attempts to contact you. And, heís full of remorse now because he knows exactly what he did to you.
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  #39  
Old 06-12-2019, 01:35 AM
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I guess sooner or later the truth will come out.
What do you mean, sooner or later? The truth is out. He values his relationships with the other women more than he values you.

Whatever. Itís only a matter of time and youíll be back to being putty in his hands. Donít say we didnít warn you.
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  #40  
Old 06-12-2019, 02:03 AM
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I know other women visit him. He tells me. He says thatís not the reason. He said that I threatened him with messing things up for him. Which is true I did do that. We got into an argument the last week we talked and I told him if I found out he was lying to me I was going to mess it up for him. He told me he got scared cause he knows when Iím mad Iím hot tempered. I mean I can get crazy sometimes so I kinda get it if thatís the real reason but iím not fully convinced. I really donít know what to think. I think he thought I was going to act crazy when I found out he took me off the list but I actually did the opposite. I left him alone. Maybe thatís why now heís tripping because he knows iím Hot headed so me being this calmed and quiet is not what he was expecting. I guess sooner or later the truth will come out.
Hahaha. Do you ever tell the truth?
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Old 06-12-2019, 02:05 AM
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What do you mean, sooner or later? The truth is out. He values his relationships with the other women more than he values you.

Whatever. Itís only a matter of time and youíll be back to being putty in his hands. Donít say we didnít warn you.

He's not playing her; she's playing him, herself and posters on this forum.
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  #42  
Old 06-12-2019, 06:11 AM
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I guess sooner or later the truth will come out.
If all the 'truth' you've seen so far isn't enough for you to stay away from this one-- and I mean this without any malice, you're getting exactly what you signed up for every step of the way. Best of luck to ya.
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  #43  
Old 06-12-2019, 07:16 AM
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This got toxic all over it! The truth has been OUT it didn't have to come out sooner or later. It came out early, early, early in the beginning. He's not that truthful so it's nothing to come out about. Whatever you know already is all you need to know now. I don't know but it sounds like you'll go right back to him once you've come down from a 100 and go back to 0 again. To each is their own.
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Old 06-12-2019, 07:42 AM
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Does anyone else wonder if this is a troll post...
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Old 06-12-2019, 03:48 PM
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Does anyone else wonder if this is a troll post...
I have; because of all the drama, obvious lies, attention seeking. Although, if any of this is genuine, the guy should be afraid of her.
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Old 06-12-2019, 04:03 PM
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Mine calls almost every day.. (5 years now)
If he misses, it is because of lockdown .
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Old 06-12-2019, 04:05 PM
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He admits he's got other women that he writes to, phones and visits with and he abuses them for money and goodness knows what else. He has taken you off his visit list. He has told you that he wants you to step up and send money for a lawyer. Yet you are still looking for him to tell you the truth as none of this is enough for you to leave him.

What more truth do you want? What more do you want to hear? That he sunk the Titanic? He poisoned Snow Whites apple? That he danced with the devil at a fiddle contest?

Nothing is going to make you see this guy for what he is so good luck to you.
I have nothing more to add.
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  #48  
Old 06-12-2019, 06:53 PM
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I know other women visit him. He tells me. He says thatís not the reason. He said that I threatened him with messing things up for him. Which is true I did do that. We got into an argument the last week we talked and I told him if I found out he was lying to me I was going to mess it up for him. He told me he got scared cause he knows when Iím mad Iím hot tempered. I mean I can get crazy sometimes so I kinda get it if thatís the real reason but iím not fully convinced. I really donít know what to think. I think he thought I was going to act crazy when I found out he took me off the list but I actually did the opposite. I left him alone. Maybe thatís why now heís tripping because he knows iím Hot headed so me being this calmed and quiet is not what he was expecting. I guess sooner or later the truth will come out.

Iím hearing a lot of ďhe says,Ē ďhe tells me,Ē ďhe said.Ē This is MWI, right? If you want to continue believing things that he tells you, thatís up to you, but at this point, Iíd be finished with taking much of anything he says seriously. I actually would have been done with his ridiculousness long before he had a chance to do something to me like remove me from his visitation list (without telling me), leaving me open to making a 5-hour drive to see him, only to be turned away at the gate. (Though, I wouldnít have made a 5-hour drive without talking to the person first.)
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Old 06-13-2019, 10:21 AM
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Old 06-13-2019, 01:18 PM
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Does anyone else wonder if this is a troll post...
Yup. Sounds like the plot of a cheesy b movie
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