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Friends & Families of Addicts Information for coping, dealing & living with a loved one's addictive behavior.

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  #1  
Old 03-07-2012, 04:17 AM
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Exclamation Do they ever really learn?

Alright from experience and what I've seen with friends they get out do good for a lil and end up going right back for the same or similar situation and it's a ongoing pattern it seems my husband this is my first time going through this and he claims things he will change and all this but he says that to everytime hes gone back any advice please
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Old 03-07-2012, 04:28 AM
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They can talk a good talk and mean everything they say but only time will tell if they can get it together.
Is he making plans for the steps he will take to stay out of trouble?
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Old 03-07-2012, 05:20 AM
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get yourself to NarAnon or AlAnon meetings. They're good people and they can help you understand what's going on and provide a lot of support.
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Old 03-07-2012, 05:42 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sheryl P.
They can talk a good talk and mean everything they say but only time will tell if they can get it together.
Is he making plans for the steps he will take to stay out of trouble?
Yeah but plans he's making while he sits in county they sure do talk a good talk thank you
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Old 03-07-2012, 12:11 PM
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Rehab doesn't make people want to stop drugs, alcohol, or the like. It helps people who wwant to stop doing those things. I mean really, really, really want to stop no matter what it takes.

You can't rehab some out of doing what they want to be doing.

If someone fails at quitting, there's a good chance they aren't ready to quit.

It's not a matter of "learning." They know. They know better than you, most likely. It just probably bothers you more then it bothers them.

So now it turns to you. How much are you willing to deal with it? What might you need to learn? Do you need to be the one to quit, or are you in your own addiction?

Best of luck
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Old 03-17-2012, 03:26 AM
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I think they can learn but they have to want it bad enough to work for it. Every time my husband went off on a binge and came home I believed he wanted to stop using...in that moment. Then the urge would hit him and he would be off again. It was pretty bad last time he did the binging. His binges would usually last for 10-12 hours and he would disappear again in less than a week. At one point he was so sick I didn't know if he could take another one. Thank God he violated his probation and is receiving help. He likes his counselor and looks forward to the meetings this is a big change for him. Will he go back to using? He may, but for now I can only keep on loving and supporting his in his efforts to stay clean.
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Old 03-19-2012, 06:25 AM
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Nobody will quit drugs unless they want to quit. All I can say really is try to motivate them and show how life can be without the drugs. Don't bash them for their addiction but try to understand from their view and find out what the root of it is. My boyfriend and I both used drugs and I stopped when he got locked up. We will be doing it all together so I hope it will make it easier. I pray your husband gets through and so do you!!
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