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Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison For everyone who has a husband, boyfriend or male partner incarcerated.

View Poll Results: Whats your BIGGEST fear that you have?
That he will cheat (either on the inside or after) 153 15.79%
That he will re-offend 245 25.28%
That he will get hurt in prison 280 28.90%
Other 291 30.03%
Voters: 969. You may not vote on this poll

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  #51  
Old 03-18-2009, 09:32 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Savvy Sista View Post
My biggest fear right now is that GOD forbid . . . my mother in- law is really sick, older and going through alot . . . and something will happen before my husband gets a chance to come home and spend some time with her and I'm not sure how he will handle that mentally . . . he is really hard on himself for not being here in her time of need and I sometimes have to tell him that I hope that motivates him to do better . . . . . .
I'm sorry to hear about your mother in law. She will be added to my prayer list Hun!!!

God Bless
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  #52  
Old 03-18-2009, 11:38 PM
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I didn't vote because honestly all 3 of the choices available are almost equal to what fears me the most.. he cheated on me in the past, and that of course is a number one fear when he comes home again, that god forbid something happens to him in there, that he may not make parole, that he may have some of his old ways when he comes home.
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  #53  
Old 03-18-2009, 11:53 PM
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my biggest fear in life is to grow old by myself and I fear once he comes out he will go back to his old ways and my biggest fear will come true...
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  #54  
Old 03-19-2009, 01:34 AM
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My only fear is none....We have God as our head so fear does not reside with us....! Be Blessed Mrs Favors....
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  #55  
Old 03-19-2009, 07:16 AM
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Default Not sure if I have any "fears"

I'm not sure if I have any "fears' per say. JT's been down for a long time now and I think that he has made some really solid goals for when he get's out. Some of which he as put into place now.

I live with the motto to "Hope for the best...Prepare for the worst" As long as I do my part by loving him with all of my heart and being as supportive as I can....then if something goes wrong, I can at least say that I gave it my all....
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  #56  
Old 03-19-2009, 08:36 AM
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I think that motto is definitely to be admired. That is exactly how I feel; as long as I have done my part then I am at peace with that.

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I'm not sure if I have any "fears' per say. JT's been down for a long time now and I think that he has made some really solid goals for when he get's out. Some of which he as put into place now.

I live with the motto to "Hope for the best...Prepare for the worst" As long as I do my part by loving him with all of my heart and being as supportive as I can....then if something goes wrong, I can at least say that I gave it my all....
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  #57  
Old 03-19-2009, 09:41 AM
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There is so much i'm scared about. I scared he will fall out of love with me or he won't be the same person when he gets out. and i hate to say this but i am scared someone will hurt him in a very bad way. and i know he would stand up for himself and im afraid he will get in more trouble or even more hurt maybe thats because i watch to much tv now and i am scared he may catch something and i know if something like that happened he would be to ashamed to tell me. I know no one around he would ever think of messin with him but in prison someone is always bigger badder or stronger. and i am also scared to ask him for a std test because he would be afriad i would see him as less of a man if something did happen to him even though i know i woudn't i know he won't reoffend so that thought doesn;t cross my mind.
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  #58  
Old 03-19-2009, 09:49 AM
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Ok, you made some very strong statements in this post especially regarding the STD test. I don't think there is anything wrong with asking him to take one. I am not sure if you guys were together before he went in but you would want to know if he had anything from then if you weren't. STDs can lie dormant in men for many many years. My girlfriend met her guy while in jail and when he got out they both took STD and HIV tests before being intimiate with each other. You should never be afraid to ask someone something when it concerns your life. If he truly loves you then he knows that you aren't thinking that he is less than a man or anything like that. So yall need to have that talk and you can strike that one off your "fears" list.

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There is so much i'm scared about. I scared he will fall out of love with me or he won't be the same person when he gets out. and i hate to say this but i am scared someone will hurt him in a very bad way. and i know he would stand up for himself and im afraid he will get in more trouble or even more hurt maybe thats because i watch to much tv now and i am scared he may catch something and i know if something like that happened he would be to ashamed to tell me. I know no one around he would ever think of messin with him but in prison someone is always bigger badder or stronger. and i am also scared to ask him for a std test because he would be afriad i would see him as less of a man if something did happen to him even though i know i woudn't i know he won't reoffend so that thought doesn;t cross my mind.
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  #59  
Old 03-19-2009, 11:04 AM
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Red face re-offend

my biggest fear is that he may re-offend and end up in prison again, he is about to finish a ten year term in aug. I have to admitt that paroling to the county he got in trouble in isn't the best and brightest idea. But i really hope that our family is enough support and of importance for him to stay focused and out of trouble.
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  #60  
Old 03-19-2009, 11:05 AM
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My Biggest Fear is having my heart broken
After a few bad relationships, I tend to think and believe that the next one is out to hurt me as well, so when I decided to committ fully to this relationship, I out my heart on the line, and to have it broken again, I don't know what I would do?
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  #61  
Old 03-19-2009, 11:09 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AB's wife View Post
Ok, you made some very strong statements in this post especially regarding the STD test. I don't think there is anything wrong with asking him to take one. I am not sure if you guys were together before he went in but you would want to know if he had anything from then if you weren't. STDs can lie dormant in men for many many years. My girlfriend met her guy while in jail and when he got out they both took STD and HIV tests before being intimiate with each other. You should never be afraid to ask someone something when it concerns your life. If he truly loves you then he knows that you aren't thinking that he is less than a man or anything like that. So yall need to have that talk and you can strike that one off your "fears" list.
I actually agree 100% with you...if he loves you he will not have any qualms over taking a std test. It is the best and safest way to make sure and for you to be worry free.
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  #62  
Old 03-19-2009, 02:50 PM
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Mine would be that he'll get out and do something stupid and be back in there...I doubt it would happen but I'm still worried about it!!
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  #63  
Old 03-19-2009, 03:59 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PEN PAL 2 FEW View Post
My Biggest Fear is having my heart broken
After a few bad relationships, I tend to think and believe that the next one is out to hurt me as well, so when I decided to committ fully to this relationship, I out my heart on the line, and to have it broken again, I don't know what I would do?

That is exactly the same as me. I'm so insecure and scared of getting hurt again.
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  #64  
Old 10-10-2009, 12:13 AM
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i fear losing him to death
i fear him walking away from us

my heart would shatter & my sons would cry
(cryin while typing. it hurts that bad thinking about it)
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  #65  
Old 10-10-2009, 12:54 AM
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My biggest greatest fear is that he would walk away from US. After riding with him thru thick and thin that he could leave it all behind to pursue all he'd missed out on while doing his time, time that we did together.
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  #66  
Old 10-10-2009, 02:16 AM
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My biggest fear is that I lose him , either because he re-offends or cheats.

Last edited by Johanna Denise; 10-10-2009 at 02:20 AM..
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  #67  
Old 10-10-2009, 02:54 AM
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My biggest fear is that I'll never see him again.
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  #68  
Old 10-10-2009, 02:40 PM
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Since we are both a little older, and he has a history of heart problems in his family, and has had issues with blood pressure while he has been in. My biggest fear is that something will happen medically, and I will never see him free again. I don't know what I would do.
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Old 10-10-2009, 02:51 PM
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My husband is 69 years old and has C O P D my fear is he wil die behind prison walls and myself or my Children will never see him alive again
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  #70  
Old 10-10-2009, 08:22 PM
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My biggest fear is that he will come home and hurt me again...

Not just by cheating again or going back to jail..but by just turning into the true butthole he was for a while..going back to the street life...

This is his second time around, the first time he didn't really do alot of the "jailhouse talk" alot of people do in there. But this time he is, because we were not doing good when he got locked up..he stepped out and it really affected the whole family. I could not believe it, and b/c we were still working on us when he got locked up he is trying everything he can to hold on to me. I honestly just dont know if hes saying the stuff b/c he really had realized how stupid he was and really wants us to be together or if hes just saying it to keep his comfort around..ya know what I mean.
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  #71  
Old 10-10-2009, 08:43 PM
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My biggest fear is him coming home to being someone totally different and us just not clicking. It'll be 5 years by the time he's home so I hope prison life didn't damage the person I love (being cold hearted and selfish from always having to watch his back). Also since I've been w/out him so long, I'm use to being by myself. So I also fear that he will bother me and see him as an inconvenience and in the way. I love my husband, but I also can't help what I feel.
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  #72  
Old 10-10-2009, 08:44 PM
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I'm 31 years old and this is the first relationship I've ever put my heart into! I've never been in love before him, and I don't plan on loving anyone other than him! He's my everything! He says he's been in love before, but he's never been in love like this. He said he never thought it was possible. He even talks about marriage...which he has never EVER considered before! He's even gone so far as to say he would never marry anyone and would laugh at anyone who had plans of marrying! He says he wants to spend forever with me, and he wants to wake up with me by his side in 50 years!
My biggest fear is one of us falling out of love with the other, and this perfect relationship/family falls apart! We are soulmates, and our family means everything to both of us!!!
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  #73  
Old 10-10-2009, 10:06 PM
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my husband is in on a second strike so my biggest fear is him catching a third strike inside.

he has never and will never cheat---if he knows what is good for him
i know that once he makes it home we will be fine...he will not re-offend!
there is concern of him getting hurt but not a fear
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  #74  
Old 10-10-2009, 10:42 PM
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my biggest fear in all this is me, not him.
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  #75  
Old 10-10-2009, 11:24 PM
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my fear is hes going to get a lot of time....im still waiting on his pending charges, and then when he does get out if hes going to be the same he was before or if he really will settle down, move away and get his life together so we can start a family...
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