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  #51  
Old 01-02-2008, 04:04 PM
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I think its really sad and quite pathetic that people feel they must qualify their level of self esteem based on their weight.

I also think its sad that many people writing in this forum feel the need to boost their self esteem by comparing themselves to people who are overweight, or older or whatever- when the posters themselves are none of those things-
I mean really how silly to sit and write out
Oh I'm not older and I'm not overweight and I have self esteem based on what I think of someone elses body type?

ridiculous, because to those nitiwits that post like that- I have this to say, if you were really that high on the evolutionary-self-esteem scale you wouldn't be worried about it_period.
if your self-esteem was that high you wouldn't be here writing about it for the world to see- you'd be out elsewhere on your high-self esteem trip seeing the world...

what can I say- I hate nitwits and their nitwitty posts.

having said my lil ranty poo #49678 of the day,

I think if someone is involved in an MWI just to get a boost for themselves, so?
AS long as no one is getting hurt, than who cares how fat or how old or how bumpy, lumpy and ugly SHe or He (becuz men & women do it both) really are if they are happy in their lumpy-bumpy butt ugly little ways.

If being in an MWI satisifes something for the Outsider and the Insider, and neither one is getting hurt, who cares how they look?
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  #52  
Old 01-02-2008, 08:05 PM
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Honestly, I used to have low self-esteem to the point that when I'd walk and look at the floor. That was back in high school though. Nowadays I walk with my head up and my shulders back. I consider myself attractive, intelligent, with a lot to offer and give, and I'm working on believing more in myself and loving myself. It is a work in progress and I'm learning to take in the positive and brush off the negative.

But...

None of this have to do with why I write an inmate, much less have feelings for one. Do some women who have low self-esteem get involved with an inmate? Yes, it happens. There are also women who have low self-esteem who date men on the outside. It's stupid to broadbrush women in MWI relationships as having low self-esteem, being unttractive, stupid, and whatever else. People, both men and women, who have low self-esteem find themselives in all types of situations and relationships. Not just MWI.

And some people just enjoy giving to others, they love to brighten another person's day. Kindness is contagious and sometimes leads to more. I see nothing wrong with that. We need more kindness in the world.

Anyway, I enjoy writing him and I really like our connection. I strive to believe that after having the connection severed 3 years ago, and being back in touch again should mean something, that it's God's will. There's a reason why people connect. Sometimes it's temporarily, sometimes it's long lasting, but regardless of how long or short the time is, everyone happens for a reason. And the people you meet and who meet you--it all happens for a reason, even if we can't understand it. That's my .02.

Last edited by FleetingDreams; 01-02-2008 at 08:08 PM..
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  #53  
Old 01-02-2008, 09:10 PM
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Im going to reply To a few people in one post....To Sutherndreamgirl..Well I would say maybe its "safer" in a sense where maybe one has issues or abandonment issues.Your man is hot btw... James Featherwood:I recognized some of the points as I can be very controlling. Compassionate: I believe like you if its in gods plan its in Gods plan.To Howiewonderstud:If you actually took the time to read my whole post rather than throw out insults I PREFACED my post twice that that WASNT MY opinion.It was the OPINION OF A GUY that was AN INMATE NOT MINE.I had just noticed a lot of points where I saw a lot of that in myself and thought I would post it being that THAT WAS THE TOPIC.If you are going to start slewing insults at least have the decency to read the whole thing.I think I even stated that I had insecurity issues in that post.Ive even stated in here that I was overweight.
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  #54  
Old 01-03-2008, 01:37 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by howiewonderstud
I think its really sad and quite pathetic that people feel they must qualify their level of self esteem based on their weight.
I also think its sad that many people writing in this forum feel the need to boost their self esteem by comparing themselves to people who are overweight, or older or whatever- when the posters themselves are none of those things-
I mean really how silly to sit and write out
Oh I'm not older and I'm not overweight and I have self esteem based on what I think of someone elses body type?
ridiculous, because to those nitiwits that post like that- I have this to say, if you were really that high on the evolutionary-self-esteem scale you wouldn't be worried about it_period.
if your self-esteem was that high you wouldn't be here writing about it for the world to see- you'd be out elsewhere on your high-self esteem trip seeing the world...
what can I say- I hate nitwits and their nitwitty posts.
HOW RUDE! You obviously missed the entire objective of this post! The statement was made by a particular inmate that he felt that women who respond to & have romantic intrest in a prisoner fits a profile (GO BACK & READ IT). The responses here were NOT posted to boost one's self esteem or to compare one another (or to each other)...but rather say not everyone who loves an inmate FITS A "PROFILE". That's ridiculous! I never claimed to be "high on the evolutionary self esteem scale" (nor has anyone else that left a post). There's nothing wrong with being confident (& comfortable) in who you are...JUST as you are. I'm sorry if you felt intimidated by our comments...or took them personally. Why would that be a problem for you? Why wouldn't we post HERE about it? This IS WHERE the topic was posted. And WE'RE the "nitwitts" ????? Hmmmm.
About the only part of your post I agree with is "I hate nitwits and their nitwitty posts".

Last edited by Suthrndreamgirl; 01-03-2008 at 01:39 AM..
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Old 01-03-2008, 01:53 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ILoveLeo
To Sutherndreamgirl..Well I would say maybe its "safer" in a sense where maybe one has issues or abandonment issues.Your man is hot btw...
I agree with you. I can see how some may feel this type of relationship as "safer" in that sense.
Oh, & thank you very much by the way...not to sound "pathetic" (as some may think) by agreeing with you about my man's "looks"...but he is a hottie, isn't he! Let me assure you...He's just as beautiful on the inside, as he is on the outside.
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  #56  
Old 01-03-2008, 11:54 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Suthrndreamgirl
HOW RUDE!
I never claimed to be "high on the evolutionary self esteem scale" (nor has anyone else that left a post). There's nothing wrong with being confident (& comfortable) in who you are...JUST as you are.
I'm sorry if you felt intimidated by our comments...or took them personally. Why would that be a problem for you? Why wouldn't we post HERE about it? This IS WHERE the topic was posted. And WE'RE the "nitwitts" ????? Hmmmm.
About the only part of your post I agree with is "I hate nitwits and their nitwitty posts".
yup I am rude, never said I wasn't.
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  #57  
Old 01-03-2008, 11:38 PM
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Who DOESN'T have low self-esteem at some point in their life, relationship or not? It comes and goes for me at least....

So yeah, I guess you could say that I have low self-esteem sometimes, but not all the time.

I just don't know what that's supposed to prove though.
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Old 01-04-2008, 01:20 AM
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Originally Posted by ILoveLeo
The woman who resonds and has romantic interest in a prisoner fits a profile: Overweight,unattractive,over 40,divorced.They have low self esteem,feel inadequate,and want to feel control and power over someone..These women have trust issues,insecurities,came from relationships with mental and physical abuse,so the relationship with the prisoner is safe.Where else can a woman have a man's complete attention and need her??? .

Yer rightio lol - actually I just liked him .. you get that anywhere .. then I actually found I could love him .. that comes rarely.

The reality Is people with low self esteem could not take this lifestyle on - this Is for the pure of heart and strong. People with low self esteem ( In the form this post was meaning ) grab anyone rather then spend 3 months alone. They would not be even considering carrying a financial / lonliness burdon for years for a partner who cannot be there propping them up. They are the ones who cannot spend 7 nights alone... never mind endless years. Its not easy and those who claim It Is make me laugh as they are the ones who are at home cryin the blues as they may be effectivly living single without the support of a constant companion for a few months. These ladies are strong you will find here and will take that burdon on due to the pureness of their hearts.

If Im sinfully ugly seems a lot of people have been humouring me all my life.

The guy I write too, speak too ect ect - hes a man. He was once on these streets, and he Is still the same person today as he was 8 yrs ago. I just wasnt lucky enough to have met him at the local pub.. but whats there would be there wherever we met.
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Old 01-05-2008, 06:11 PM
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1. The only person I know personally who is in a MWI relationship is myself, and if I wrote what I think of my looks compared with people in general...then I'd come over all big-headed.

2. I had low self-esteem at a much younger age. At that time I didn't even consider writing to an inmate, instead I got with a successful corporate type to boost my esteem by hitch-hiking on his. Only when I got older and learned to love myself as I am did I find my Honey. Back in my low self-esteem days I wouldn't have had the strength or self-belief to cope with this life.

3. Sounds like a great story to tell the grand-kids.

Howiewonderstud, in my case my weight was a direct measure of my self-esteem. I don't say that's the case for everybody, but I weighed about 50lbs more when I felt bad about myself than I do today. And I don't feel better because I lost weight, I lost weight because I started to love and respect myself.
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Old 01-06-2008, 02:48 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Suthrndreamgirl
HOW RUDE! You obviously missed the entire objective of this post! The statement was made by a particular inmate that he felt that women who respond to & have romantic intrest in a prisoner fits a profile (GO BACK & READ IT). The responses here were NOT posted to boost one's self esteem or to compare one another (or to each other)...but rather say not everyone who loves an inmate FITS A "PROFILE". That's ridiculous! I never claimed to be "high on the evolutionary self esteem scale" (nor has anyone else that left a post). There's nothing wrong with being confident (& comfortable) in who you are...JUST as you are. I'm sorry if you felt intimidated by our comments...or took them personally. Why would that be a problem for you? Why wouldn't we post HERE about it? This IS WHERE the topic was posted. And WE'RE the "nitwitts" ????? Hmmmm.
About the only part of your post I agree with is "I hate nitwits and their nitwitty posts".
I've met a LOT of nice people from Canada but fortunately the ones I have met have had some class.She didnt even read my whole post and just attacked me like that.And shes proud of being rude too.
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Old 01-06-2008, 03:11 AM
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The weight issue: In response to Stormchild I think everyone feels differently about themselves when it comes to weight.There are some women that absolutely LOVE themselves at any weight and it shows.I personally feel Id have higher self esteem if I was leaner but that could just be me saying that. To StormFlower: I partly agree with you as far as being with someone during the "longhaul" they need to be strong but I DO believe there are women that have low self-seteem that can fall for any line that an inmate tells them.And I know i've read enough stories on here of women who do.Wether you have high self esteem,low self esteem who DOESNT like getting letters and compliments etc???I think at some point after the "newness" wears out reality sets in and someone not too strong or needy cant handle it.I have gone through the "what ifs" of wishing wondering Id met the current person I write to on the outside cause I'm quite sure he was going to some of the same bars/clubs i was going to when I was going out a lot.I think a lot of us have gone through the "what ifs" especially if they lived close to us.You realize what a small world it is when you start talking about that stuff and then you wonder why you never met.
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Old 01-06-2008, 01:30 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ILoveLeo
I've met a LOT of nice people from Canada but fortunately the ones I have met have had some class.She didnt even read my whole post and just attacked me like that.And shes proud of being rude too.
I know...some people! That's not a quality I'd be proud of. Maybe she has some insecurity issues herself...for her to be so judgemental & say those things. To take our personal opinions & thoughts about generalizing women who are with inmates as being "insecure"...& turn it around that way...sounds personal to me. There's no sense in that. ???? But to each his (or her) own. I've learned a long time ago to pick my battles. Some things (people) are just not worth it to me.
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Old 01-06-2008, 02:09 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ILoveLeo
I think at some point after the "newness" wears out reality sets in and someone not too strong or needy cant handle it.
This is very true. And surprisingly enough, that's exactly what happens with people who meet on the outside.

My belief is that if people have unresolved issues in their past and they drag it into a new relationship things will eventually fall apart. The question will be, will the founation be strong enough to work through it?

Self-esteem always has something to do with how relationships work out, inside and outside of prison. Women who get involved with inmates may fit a profile of some sort - just like women who get involved with rich men fit a profile of some sort (just speaking generally here).

But the question - women in prison relationships have low self esteem? I would have to say yes they do. But I also think most people have self-esteem problems in all walks of life... no one goes through life without those problems. It just depends on how people handle those problems how the relationship plays out... does the problematic partner lean on his SO and rely on him/her to SOLVE the problems? Or be a band-aid on those problems? If that's the case, the relationship is doomed from the start. Inside AND outside of prison.

What I don't get is why it's such a no-no to admit to self-esteem problems... everyone has them to some extent. What's so difficult to admit? And why are so many people in denial about it? Life would be just perfect if we could all find someone without problems... and that's actually what some people expect and LOOK for - and of course they will never ever find it... because it doesn't exist. Everyone has a past - everyone has some baggage. It always boils down to how that baggage is dealt with - it's not really a question about whether that baggage exists or not (it certainly does exist).

Personally I wouldn't even want to be with someone "problem- or past free". That means no life experience and no experience means no maturity and life would simply be BORING with a person like that.
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Old 01-06-2008, 03:30 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ILoveLeo
I've met a LOT of nice people from Canada but fortunately the ones I have met have had some class.She didnt even read my whole post and just attacked me like that.And shes proud of being rude too.
I made no comment about who in particular made the posts-
YOU chose to be offended.
By taking it to heart about whether or nto that post what meant for you.

If you don't think I am nice, than don't-
I am not worried about whether or not people think I am nice
-you're pretty much a stranger to me-so here's something to learn about me-
I call things the way I see them- rudely sometimes, and kind sometimes too;
youa re quite obviously insecure about many things in this posting of yours
I say that because the very fact that you took it upon yourself to respond in such a hurt manner tells me alot about you.

The very fact that you go to others in the same forum looking for them to back you up, against My post also says something about your insecurities as well.

stand up for yourself - if you want to attack someone- not jsut me here, but anyone, than try to get other people to do it for you.

to make generalizations about Canadians- not all Canadianas are nice, not all of us are stupid and few of us are naive. I am sure there are alot of us who do and will stand up for ourselves.
Just like not all Americans or Englishmen or Swedes or any other people from other parts of the world- are always nice, smart or have high self esteem.
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Old 01-06-2008, 03:40 PM
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OKAY FRIENDS time for a gentle reminder:

We will get back on topic and we will no longer welcome any off topic comments especially those that refer back to any already included in this thread.

Back to the original topic now, PLEASE...

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Old 01-06-2008, 06:51 PM
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Old 01-06-2008, 07:37 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rox73
My belief is that if people have unresolved issues in their past and they drag it into a new relationship things will eventually fall apart. The question will be, will the founation be strong enough to work through it?
I totally AGREE with having to have a strong foundation to build a relationship on. If not...it can fall apart. Leaving alot of room for resentment. If a relationship is started off with deception & secrets....or a whole load of baggage (not known from the get go)...you spend all your time sorting back trough what should've been laid out in the beginning.
Self-esteem always has something to do with how relationships work out, inside and outside of prison. Women who get involved with inmates may fit a profile of some sort - just like women who get involved with rich men fit a profile of some sort (just speaking generally here). I believe many are drawn to a particular "type" of person. Some like the "bad boy" image (not a better place to find them than prison). What one see's attractive (whether it be with looks, qualities, etc...) someone else might not. I personally don't see the need to stereotype. I have a friend that will ONLY date black men. Another that will ONLY date hispanic men. That's their preference....their choice. I personally have dated men from different races...my guy now is Guamanian. I'm attracted to the person...for WHO they are...not by their skin color, nationality, where they live or what they have. But that's just me.
But the question - women in prison relationships have low self esteem? I would have to say yes they do. But I also think most people have self-esteem problems in all walks of life... no one goes through life without those problems. It just depends on how people handle those problems how the relationship plays out... does the problematic partner lean on his SO and rely on him/her to SOLVE the problems? Or be a band-aid on those problems? If that's the case, the relationship is doomed from the start. Inside AND outside of prison. Mmmm, I personally still don't agree with that (my opinion) about women in prison relationships have low self esteems. To say it in that way would make it appear as ALL women do. I'm sure there may be some...but not all. Again...to me that's strereotyping. I do agree we all have some issues about ourselves at some level...we wouldn't be human if we didn't. I remember turning 30 & sitting at the stop sign for 15 minutes crying! Then I realized, I'm blessed to have made it to 30! Almost 10 years later, yes, I cringe when I see a new wrinkle or grey hair...but I have decided to be comfortable with myself...& age gracefully. I don't need to look for validation (or an estem boost) by looking for or starting a relationship from a man in prison. Just me personally...my opinion. I do agree it's how you choose to handle things. It's not what the issue or situation, but how you coose to deal with them.
What I don't get is why it's such a no-no to admit to self-esteem problems... everyone has them to some extent. What's so difficult to admit? And why are so many people in denial about it? Life would be just perfect if we could all find someone without problems... and that's actually what some people expect and LOOK for - and of course they will never ever find it... because it doesn't exist. Everyone has a past - everyone has some baggage. It always boils down to how that baggage is dealt with - it's not really a question about whether that baggage exists or not (it certainly does exist). Yes, I agree with that. Just like an addict is always in search of the same high as the first hit. You just can't get it. Relationships can be the same way. People always are looking for "the perfect" relationship, or expect it to be the same always as from the beginning...when they're in that euphoric stage. When the "new" wears off...you're left with the person (& all that comes with them).
Personally I wouldn't even want to be with someone "problem- or past free". That means no life experience and no experience means no maturity and life would simply be BORING with a person like that. I've got enough life experience to pass around to anyone that doesn't have enough of their own! LOL. I've lived a "colorful" life...but don't have regrets...that's what's helped to shape me in to who I am today.

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Old 01-06-2008, 08:05 PM
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Default A long response to questions that hit close to home.

1. Do you think women who met their men while he was incarcerated, is less attractive than the average woman?

Not at all!!! Some of the people I've seen around here have posted pictures of themselves and they're all absolutely beautiful inside and out. This question insinuates that women who meet men while they're incarcerated are acting out of desperation, perhaps because they feel they can't get a man any other way. That assumption is not only absolutely wrong, but it's also a sign of ignorance so gross that it disgusts me. The truth is that it takes a very special bond to see two people through a prison sentence. Every woman on this forum could abandon their man and find someone who's already free, but we won't. We love our men so deeply that nothing in this world could ever break that bond. Not time apart, not transfers, not lonliness and certainly not anyone who's narrow-minded and cruel enough to make such assumptions. Women who can see past a man's mistakes and love him for the man he has become have more heart than those who are so judgemental. In my opinion that makes these women _more_ attractive than average.

2. Do you think that a woman who writes to a man as a penpal has low self esteem and is searching for trouble? Why would any human take the time and write to a man while he's incarcerated?

Everyone has different reasons for writing to a man as a penpal. Mine have nothing to do with low self esteem, it was all about compassion. I looked through the pen pal site because I know how hard it can be for men to be locked away for years. I also knew that the men posting there most likely don't have anyone left, they've probably been abandoned by all of their loved ones and all of their friends, and they're just trying to reach out and show people that they're not bad human beings, they've learned their lessons and they just need someone to believe in them. What's the point of living if we're never given a chance to learn from our mistakes and to redeam ourselves? I realize that some men never want to change their ways and they're perfectly fine with being in and out of prison for the rest of their lives (more often "in" than "out"). I knew that I couldn't befriend all the lonely souls, but I felt like maybe I could reach out to just one and make a difference that way. When I saw Gabriel's face and I read his ad I knew he'd be an awesome pen pal. He was light- hearted and fun in the ad, honest without sounding needy or shadey. So I wrote to him and when he wrote back he told me that he spent time living in my home town - I had no idea! We had so much to write about then; he talked about places that I hang out at all the time, it was the perfect ice breaker. It was so easy for me to be completely open and honest with him, I've told him things that I've never told anyone else before. I cherish the way we got to know each other from the inside out - I feel closer to him than I ever have to anyone else, and I can't wait until we can truly be together forever.

3. What about the women who met their men from that accidental phone call. Why would you accept a call from a man who is in prison when we all know the games that inmates play with the phone?

You accept phone calls in case it sounds like someone you know, or if you want to tell the man that he has the wrong number instead of just being rude and hanging up. Women who met their men from that accidental phone call know themselves and trust their judgement - if the guy turns out to be a creep it most likely wouldn't be too hard to cut him out of her life forever, especially if all he has to contact her by is a phone number. And if he turns out to be amazing that's just proof that her judgement was right on the money.
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Old 01-06-2008, 08:49 PM
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Everyone involved within an MWI relationship has their own reasons for getting involved in the first place, but down the road those reasons may change.

As for attractiveness being a factor-
pertaining to the post about the inmate who had an opinion about what he sees in particular- Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
All over the palce you see a huge variety couples, not just in MWI relationships- some where one may be largely obese & the partner not, some with the huge age differences; soewhere one may be asthetically pleasing and the partner less so- Yet those relationships work.

It takes a unique combination of strengths to maintain an MWI relationship for a long period of time- stamina, willpower, patience and hope- as opposed to desparation, which is weakness and very few weak people ever maintain long-term relationships.
Not just weak as in desparate- but weak as in greedy, selfish, arrogant- any one of those weak characteristics will undermine and destroy a relationship after awhile.
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  #70  
Old 01-08-2008, 04:06 AM
princssabsinthe princssabsinthe is offline
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I myself am not in a MWI relationship, but thought i'd chime in anyway...
Women in MWI relationships have low self esteem? WTF?? Whatever small minded moron is making statements like that, has OBVIOUSLY never been in a relationship with someone who is incarcerated. This sh!t isn't pleasent & it's surely no joke... it takes onehelluva strong woman to soldier through having their man locked up. Personally, i don't know a single woman with low self esteem that would last a week in a MWI relationship. It takes some serious love & trust to make a relationship with a inmate work, if you knew each other on the streets or not is irrelevant. I have nothing but admiration & respect for those of you who go the distance with your MWI relationships. Low self esteem my a$$... you saw what you wanted & you went for it, good for all of you!!
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  #71  
Old 01-10-2008, 02:08 PM
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I Can Have Any Man That I Choose To, But I Chose Him, I Am Sexy, Men Love And Want Me, But I Choose Him Because He Makes Me Feel Good About Myself
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  #72  
Old 01-10-2008, 04:45 PM
tweedybird tweedybird is offline
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I think we'd have to do a real statisical survey to come up with whether the women who met a man MWI are less secure or less attractive. One thing I know is, if we have it in our mind that something is so, we tend to only "see" that which reinforces our beliefs. In other words if you believe that you would only remember the women in the visit room who aren't that attractive or seem insecure.

In many age groups there are lots more single women than single men. That might be one explanation for people hooking up with an inmate!

Why would anyone write a stranger? Not because they are looking for a man! They do so because they are compassionate people. Maybe sometimes it's to add a little interest to their life.

I have gotten wrong numbers from local prisons and never accepted the call.
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  #73  
Old 01-10-2008, 08:11 PM
AmazingA AmazingA is offline
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I just got into it with a friend of mine today on the phone. I get so tired of hearing how I am making a mistake with my man. How do you know he isn't going to leave you when he gets out? Once a person is sick they are always sick. Those kinds of things. I never ment to fall in love with my man it just happened. I don't all of them are sick. What really gets me is when someone who use to or still does have a drug problem can turn their nose up at my man. The only difference is he was cought and they weren't or not as of yet. WTF!
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  #74  
Old 01-10-2008, 08:45 PM
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GabesGirl GabesGirl is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AmazingA
I just got into it with a friend of mine today on the phone. I get so tired of hearing how I am making a mistake with my man. How do you know he isn't going to leave you when he gets out? Once a person is sick they are always sick. Those kinds of things. I never ment to fall in love with my man it just happened. I don't all of them are sick. What really gets me is when someone who use to or still does have a drug problem can turn their nose up at my man. The only difference is he was cought and they weren't or not as of yet. WTF!
I've learned in life that there are three different types of nay-sayers: those who are scared/worried/concerned, those who are ignorent and those who are simple being cruel. A lot of times I encounter a mix of the three in people who lash out at me for decisions that I make in life, but for the most part I think people turn all negative and mean for those three main reasons. The question, "How do you know he isn't going to leave you when he gets out?" sounds like concern, even if whomever's asking is asking with a nasty attitude. Whomever asks such a quesiton needs to remember that all relationships have risk involved. "Once a person is sick they are always sick", sounds like ignorence and close-mindedness to me. I've seen many people turn their lives around and I will always believe in redemption, second chances, faith and hope. Without all that life isn't really worth living. You say you never meant to fall in love with your man...some of the best relationships I've ever wittnessed have happened when neither person was expecting to fall in love. You don't owe the world an explanation for how you feel and loving your man is not a bad thing. I think it's beautiful. Take care, and don't let the nay-sayers make you feel bad.
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  #75  
Old 01-10-2008, 10:51 PM
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Just thinking outloud...

When I was involved in the MWI part of my relationship the MWI forum did not exist.

We met by accident, a misdialed phone call. I was involved in a dating around scenario that was outstanding and suited my lifestyle. I didn't need him to "boost" my esteem or for any other reason.

I fell in love with him though, even while in the beginning dating wonderful young men that were enamored of me.

Low self esteem is an unfortunate fact for some. It may even lead them into less than desirable relationships with less than desirable mates some of whom may OR may NOT be incarcerated individuals. Please bear in mind that messed up people are all around us you see them at work, in the store, at the post office, church, so on and so forth. One need not go looking in the DOC files to find someone if that is what they are looking for.

Throughout this journey I have come in contact with a great many MWI's on and off PTO and I have to say that the overwhelming number tends to tilt in the direction of savvy, self assured, outstanding in their own right type of women. I'm not discounting that percentage that have issues and fall into a not so great relationship with someone who happens to be incarcerated, I just happen to believe that incarceration was not necessarily the determing factor. As with all things there are exceptions to the rule, I accept that.

When push comes to shove if you feel esteemed and happen to find yourself in a MWI relationship why even concern yourself with what others think?

Patty
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