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Raising Children with Parents in Prison For the Parent left behind with children AND for the Children that have a parent inside. Discussion of unique challenges facing this group!

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  #26  
Old 04-23-2018, 10:46 AM
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This is honestly been on my mind since before he got to jail. I'm constantly thinking and going back and forth over and over.
Trying to keep my personal opinions about not having the choice to know my father, and my mom making that decision for me, how i resent her so much sometimes even though everyone says it was for the best, now i don't get that chance since from what I've been told he is no longer around.

I know people can be violent towards their partners/exs and not their kids.
I honestly think it's for the best for every one.
He can still be in her life, as another father figure to her, if he chooses and if she wants him in her life(when shes old enough to decide) but then if he goes back to how he started, i can quickly protect her from that. & later on when she's older and if he's shown he's changing in that aspect in his life, we can always come to an agreement of visitations if that's something she wants as well. I know if might seem silly to terminate his rights, if I'm going to let him be in her life, but I've heard many terrible stories, rights being terminated to late, child custody taking to long to get fixed, and it became to late.

She's my only daughter, my baby girl. I'd rather take the steps now before it becomes a chance to be "too late". The fear of him just up and leaving with her one on of his unsupervised visitations that the judge said he will eventually have, is too scary. He's threatened it before, and unfortunately our current wonderful lawyer said, he can say it but if there's no proof there's no proof of it(this was before he was in jail, so it was said face to face). & in his letters him saying "I'm coming back for you baby girl, trust me on that" just so scary. I have to protect her.
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Originally Posted by sidewalker View Post
* continues to get time added for violence*

well then it does not seem he's changed alot.
If he does have visitation its gotta be monitored. (like you said, at your home with others present, or another third party)
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  #27  
Old 04-23-2018, 12:14 PM
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If you get a protection order because of his violence to you, then you will have another tool to use if he appears at your door. If he applies for unsupervised visits, make sure to inform that judge of his threats, and his violent history.
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Old 04-23-2018, 12:46 PM
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I did have an order of protection, it expired and can't be renewed until he's about 2 months before his renewal date. But our lawyer said he was asking around and since he would be in jail for a total of 4 years they may not even entertain an order of protection since it's been so long. They said unless he gets out and comes at me, i most likely cannot get another one unless something happens.
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Originally Posted by fbopnomore View Post
If you get a protection order because of his violence to you, then you will have another tool to use if he appears at your door. If he applies for unsupervised visits, make sure to inform that judge of his threats, and his violent history.
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