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  #26  
Old 01-14-2013, 07:17 PM
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that's awesome Gus u can do it. We are all behind u I hope that one day my hubby gets to feel what that's like too. congratulations I agree u pray on it he will never let u down.
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  #27  
Old 01-14-2013, 10:26 PM
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Hi Gus! Keep checking in. You need support-you need a reality check. Small steps, brother. Small steps. Remember, you're in a new country now-a new world. No one expects you to master the language in a day or two. give yourself plenty of space to have some feelings-some fear, even some depression after the newness wears off. Everything you feel is okay, and it will pass. Normal takes about a year. Work will make you feel better-give you a routine. So will regular exercise and sleep. Sounds crazy, but it's like you're coming home from a war. Be sweet to yourself. Chocolate. Rest. Practice hope. Give yourself some goals-maybe write them down somewhere. Little ones. Big ones. Both kinds are important.

There is NO REASON you can't have the very best this world has to offer-the love of a good partner, the joy of meaningful work, the friendship of people who care about you, the pride that comes in a life lived honestly and responsibly. You deserve all of it. You may have forgotten that in prison, or people may have told you you didn't deserve it, but they were lying.

The Salvation Army is a great place and might have some referrals for you to..same with AA. Your challenge will be to build a healthy support network for yourself, to go to when you meet up with an obstacle or a tough time. There is hope, even in that situation. You just have to get through it, and reach out to the good people out there who are waiting to help. If you know where to look, you'll find them. They'll take your hand. You are not alone. Ever.

Clearly you have done so much right to just survive and get through what kills the body and souls of so many people. Congratulations. Pat yourself on the back. You deserve it.

KEEP POSTING HERE! You're like our Prisontalk Baby, learning everything on the outside for the first time!

Keep the faith, brother. keep the faith. We're behind you all the way!!!!

xo Bunny

Last edited by bunnybunny; 01-14-2013 at 10:32 PM..
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  #28  
Old 01-15-2013, 05:01 AM
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As part of my release I had to inform the police where I was living, which I did. They have called to my home twice in 3 days parking the cop car right out front ! I told them to stop calling as I dont want my neighbours to think I am trouble. I think they are only trying to annoy me but I will remain calm as I am calm all the time anyway.
Gus
  #29  
Old 01-15-2013, 05:45 AM
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My loved one gets hassled about every time he walks out the door.
They have him remove his shirt,check his ID and tattoos,ask him questions and it is annoying because he isn't doing anything when they stop him.
He got pretty aggravated when his PO started commenting about the number of police "contacts" he was reporting.
They will find that your no fun if you just remain cheerful,keep doing well and don't give them even the smallest reason to cause you grief.
Think of them as motivation to stay positive :-)
Your doing great but the high will wear off and you need to find things to keep you busy.
You will make it!
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  #30  
Old 01-15-2013, 11:41 AM
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Congratulations on your release !! You sound like you ae doing very well !! Try to remain positive in your thoughts even when the police are bugging you. Do you have parole ?? Have you reached out to any church or salvation army ?? Keep up the good work..
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  #31  
Old 01-15-2013, 11:57 AM
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Thank you for sharing with us Gus!! You really renew the hope in all of us for our loved ones!! Good luck to you!!
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  #32  
Old 01-15-2013, 12:06 PM
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This is a wonderful thread!!! All the best to you Gus, and I hope you enjoy every bit the world has to offer
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  #33  
Old 01-15-2013, 12:54 PM
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I really enjoy this thread, love reading your updates. I really thought it was neat reading about the dinner you made for yourself. We often take for granted the many choicYou're doing great and we have faith in you!
  #34  
Old 01-15-2013, 04:56 PM
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Sorry Gus, my post went wacky on me. What I was trying to say above is, that we often over look how fortunate we are to be able to make even the smallest choices. Thanks again for sharing!
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  #35  
Old 01-15-2013, 07:24 PM
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Another day of simple wonderful choices today. Bought a few new clothes today and some nice after shave then a hot towel shave and a haircut and I had a choice of how short I wanted it ! ! This summer I am going to do what I dreamed about for 30 years and go camping in the wilderness for a few days with a bit of fishing and a few beers around a camp fire in the evening. Small things to some but MASSIVE to me. Eventually I hope to meet some like minded outdoor type people but I must be very careful about who I befriend for obvious reasons.
I cannot afford to hang out with anyone who gets pulled over by cops on a regular basis as I have to keep my nose super clean ! ! But all these things will happen over time and I am very comfortable with my own company at the moment and everyday is like my birthday. I must learn how to download music etc as I love walking to music.
Thank you all for your support and I know if I have any questions about anything I could ask them here and somebody would point me in the right direction.
I am so much more relaxed now and sleep like a baby every night in my clean bed ! !

Thanks again
Gus x
  #36  
Old 01-15-2013, 08:20 PM
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I have really enjoyed this thread. Glad you're doing well

DougsCandy Sent from my LG-P509 using PrisonTalk
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  #37  
Old 01-17-2013, 08:24 PM
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god bless u bro. I'm an exlifer too but a short timer next to u. I just got out a little over a year ago. I was 19 too and went in for accessory to a homicide in a crime where I tried to take the gun away from the shooter and tried talking him out of it but he killed the victim anyway when I walked away wanting nothing to do with it. I didn't tell on him when I foudn out he did it. SO i got 25 to life in cali. But u really got screwed. But ur out and I'm very happy for u. i only did 16 and a half years. A miracle! enjoy ur freedom!
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  #38  
Old 01-17-2013, 09:01 PM
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This is great! Best of luck to you. Keep going forward.
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  #39  
Old 01-18-2013, 03:56 PM
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hitting a bit of a low at the moment, cant stop sleeping, shower, eat, sleep etc, bit down will check back soon
gus
  #40  
Old 01-18-2013, 04:01 PM
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And this too shall pass. Hang in there baby you've already come so far !


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hitting a bit of a low at the moment, cant stop sleeping, shower, eat, sleep etc, bit down will check back soon
gus
  #41  
Old 01-18-2013, 04:09 PM
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I am sure that your low moment will pass. Just keep your chin up, the way you have been doing it so far. I just love your thread. It is inspiring just to read how you make the most of your days. Good luck!
  #42  
Old 01-18-2013, 04:36 PM
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This is a great thread. Just take one day at a time, Gus. Congratulations on your freedom
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  #43  
Old 01-19-2013, 04:15 AM
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Hi Gus.
Remember we told you that after the high of finally having freedom after so many years,you would come down to a kind of low?
This is where the reality that life has it's share of things to tackle out here too hits you.It's nomal.
Time to get to meetings,look for work,donate your skills somewhere,etc...
This is a normal part of your transition so don't worry,just drag yourself out of the funk and look for thigs to do that will keep you moving forward.
You are doing great so no worries!
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  #44  
Old 01-19-2013, 05:16 AM
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Do not hesitate to go talk this out with someone. Start at the Salvation Army. They will help. There is a legitimate syndrome call post incarceration syndrome. Sort of a prison version of ptsd. Not saying you have it just saying this is a big adjustment for anyone. Please go talk to someone.
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  #45  
Old 01-19-2013, 08:18 AM
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Mood Lifted, Back on track ! Bought a stove yesterday for my trip to the hills, Nearly bought a knife but freaked out a bit if I was stopped with a hunting knife so I left it ! Looking for a tent next !
Gus
  #46  
Old 01-19-2013, 08:34 AM
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Ahhh...there ya go Gus, good to hear! You know I got a little giggle after reading about your trip to the hills. At first I thought, why the heck after 30 yrs of being without any luxurys would someone choose to "rough it in the wild" and seem so excited about it! Lol After giving it some more thought, it sounds like a very peacful journey. Connecting with nature can really fill the soul. I look forward to hearing more from you... Thanks Gus for giving us a peek into your world.
  #47  
Old 01-19-2013, 09:49 AM
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All the best to you, Gus from across the ocean. It has been a long time and it will take time to adjust and it is just so much easier with the support of family and/or friends. But none the less, this here is like family where you can always find support and there was some good advice already in the thread about how to reach out to some people like church and salvation army. It sure is nice that you can go and buy your own food and household articles and get what you want and need and like. I wish you all the best and all the strength needed to start your new life. I had a penpal who got released and I can watch on Facebook how he has started enjoying his life and it warms my heart to see that he got a job and a car and got to go to places where he wanted to and you will have all of that as well. You sound very sensible as far as avoiding to get into any bad situation is concerned, such as deciding not to get that knife for yourself, which I think was a wise decision just since now you are checked on so much. In my country they cannot afford to check on people on such a basis but that is not necessary anyway. And I think over there they are putting their money into the wrong things. Instead of helping people to stay out of trouble they seem to be anxious to catch you with something you are not allowed doing so they can put you back in. Somehow makes me think like they feel good about that instead of seing that those overcrowded prisons are getting emptier. Anyway, just keep your cool like you did so far and try to make the most of everything. All the best.
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Old 01-20-2013, 09:22 PM
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Change and Courage. I agree the Salvation Army helps so many coming back! Please keep us posted and know we are here. This is not easy but You can do it after what You already been thru. We will keep yOU IN OUR PRAYERS. REMEBER libraries have internet. WE are here.
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Sitting here in Florida, after 30 years inside and I am So Scared. No Family anymore, Have enough Money for a few weeks but dont know what to do. I have to wait 2 weeks for my new passport. Got a good deal in a Motel on a weekly basis but am afraid to go outside. I could go anywhere in the world, Help ! Ps No Family or Friends so I am as free as the bird I dreamt about all those years !
Gus x
  #49  
Old 01-21-2013, 03:39 AM
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Thanks for the hope you give us too Ex- Lifer ( a release date does actually come around!)... My hubby is on his 2nd bid 20+ years and sometimes I imagine for him the baby steps you are taking now. Congratulations and your success. We are all proud of you. Hang in there and keep us posted.
  #50  
Old 01-21-2013, 10:19 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ex lifer View Post
Hi All, Things good. Cooked my first meal in 30 years last night and was it good, Pork chops, roast potatoes, white cabbage, carrots and lots of gravy. I always was a good cook and really you dont forget how to do it. A few beers clean bed...bliss !
I still wake in the morning and cant believe I am free but the silence soon confirms it. No shouting, no banging doors etc !
Onwards and upwards. Thank you all so much for your good wishes, It means a lot to me.
Gus
Im so happy for you!! My fianceé has been in for 20 yrs, and will be home next year. I think about how hard the transition will be for him, for us. Keepin u in prayer. One day at a time, keep moving forward! God bless.
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