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  #126  
Old 04-28-2011, 10:26 AM
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The most terrifying rumor about prison is rape. I can’t believe they guards can not control this, but from what I hear it happens to everybody. What is the truth about prison rape. Why do they do this, and most importantly, how can I avoid getting raped?

any links/advice
Prison rapes are very common, and is often not reported. Just like the prison relationships aren't ever discussed, it's understood that these things just happen. The married/straight man in prison with a "prison wife" they both understand that it is only because of the situation and they aren't planing on getting out and living happily ever after. Now keep in mind certain convictions in prison are taboo (child molesters and rapists) are at the bottom of the "food chain so to speak, and are usually the primary targets, but it could happen to anyone. Just like on the outside, how often do you see a man reporting a rape?! Rules in prison are different, like in prison if your pants are saggin' it means you are "open" for sex but on the outside you a gangsta'!
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  #127  
Old 09-19-2013, 01:29 PM
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I spent time in the late 90's and I believe rape was ignored more by staff then. I haven't been in a while now, but from those I have talked to, staff are far more aware of it now because of PREA. it is helping, I believe. I think there will always be prison rape, but if it decreases, that is a good start. when I was in, it was basically ignored and small white guys were getting raped and sold all the time. I was one of them...took me a long time to talk about it, but my mind is clear and finally ready to discuss it. But, like I said, I think its much more on the radar of staff now.
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  #128  
Old 09-22-2013, 10:24 PM
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I think it mostly depends on the place you're at. If you'd told me it happened at Yazoo City Low - I'd have said you were nuts. Too many CO's around - even in the middle of the night.

However, I do know of a guy that got raped at a place called Fountain, a state prison in Alabama. He was a guy whose family looked out for him. They sent him 50 to 100 bucks every week. He gambled on the outside, and the inside was no different. He was comfortable running up a debt after losing while gambling because he expected that money order in the mail. Then, one week - his family cut him off - they'd heard from someone elses relative of one of the other inmates how he was gambling. So, they finally exercised some tough love. Long story short - he couldn't pay his debt, so one of the guys he owed sold the debt to someone else and that someone else raped him. They made a punk out of him for the rest of his time there until by the grace of God, he got transferred and turned things around. No more gambling for him!

So - even though this thread is 8 years old, my advice is to mind your own business and never accept any favors from anyone. Don't accept someone's dessert, don't eat any candy bars left on your bed and politely but firmly, insist that noone sit on your bed, ever.
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  #129  
Old 01-05-2014, 11:12 PM
Wendy1918 Wendy1918 is offline
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My question is regardless of whatever smashing my husband may or may not be involved in while he's inside, how is this gunna effect our sex life when he comes home!?

He told me it does happen where he is for various reasons, but he can hold his own he is ok. I have never brought it up again and I can't imagine even bringing up the subject once he is out. I just want to let it go, and I know that he will too. I worry though, let's say it does happen to him, how do I support him in emotionally recovering from such a horrific trauma? I want him to feel masculine and loved. As his wife I'm unbelievably jealous about this issue and I hate that I am powerless to stop it.

I don't want him to feel like damaged goods ya know? And it sucks not being able to talk about it. Some sick, selfish part of me feels betrayed... almost like he cheated, but he didn't. This is different. He told me he hasn't been smashed and won't smash anyone... but I feel in my gut that this is one war story that he wouldn't share with me anyway.

I'm thankful for this thread. My emotions are really intense and I haven't talked to anyone about it.
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  #130  
Old 01-06-2014, 03:56 AM
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Wendy I asked my boyfriend about this .He did 2 years when he was 18 and he was considered a sex offender (he had consensual sex with a 14 year old when he was 17..got 2 years ..10 years probation and 10 years sex offender registry and they call it justice ) he is not little 6 feet 200 lbs ..but he is a pretty white boy and was certainly a cutie back then ..he said he was never sexually assaulted ..he was approached and said no and was left alone . He said the only thing he ever got into a fight over was his sneakers and he got an ass whooping over them ..he said his mom said just give them your damn sneakers I'll get you another pair but he said no I had to fight or else no one would respect me there .. He told me that the guys who got it on together it was mutual for the most part . He did admit he got a ticket once because he got caught masturbating ..like what 18 or 19 year old guy doesn't do that ? Apparently they call it self mutilation..something I think a lot of us are guilty of ..just sayin"
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  #131  
Old 01-06-2014, 06:27 AM
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Originally Posted by Wendy1918 View Post
My question is regardless of whatever smashing my husband may or may not be involved in while he's inside, how is this gunna effect our sex life when he comes home!?

He told me it does happen where he is for various reasons, but he can hold his own he is ok. I have never brought it up again and I can't imagine even bringing up the subject once he is out. I just want to let it go, and I know that he will too. I worry though, let's say it does happen to him, how do I support him in emotionally recovering from such a horrific trauma? I want him to feel masculine and loved. As his wife I'm unbelievably jealous about this issue and I hate that I am powerless to stop it.

I don't want him to feel like damaged goods ya know? And it sucks not being able to talk about it. Some sick, selfish part of me feels betrayed... almost like he cheated, but he didn't. This is different. He told me he hasn't been smashed and won't smash anyone... but I feel in my gut that this is one war story that he wouldn't share with me anyway.

I'm thankful for this thread. My emotions are really intense and I haven't talked to anyone about it.

It is natural to worry bout their safety is any prison. Turning yourself inside out about this issue will not do you or him any good. Such things do happen in the higher security facilities, but it doesn't happen to everyone. As long as they mind their own bussines, don't borrow or gamble, and don't wear their hearts on their sleeve, they should be ok... You will find that spending your time being encouraging to him about the future and his own ability to rise above the situation is a much better use of your emotional energy.
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  #132  
Old 01-12-2014, 04:54 AM
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In all the years I spent incarcerated (over a decade) I never heard of or witnessed a single prison rape. I was on several Texas prison units, a couple of them so-called "hard core". I am not saying it doesn't happen, only that it was never part of my personal experience. I should point out that I DEFINITELY HAVE seen on several occasions an otherwise straight man manipulated into sexual favors ... but not through physical force. It is also my observation that unwanted sexual encounters are more prevalent in the county jails than in prison. Not sure why that is, but that is the perception I had.
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  #133  
Old 01-12-2014, 06:16 AM
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In all the years I spent incarcerated (over a decade) I never heard of or witnessed a single prison rape. I was on several Texas prison units, a couple of them so-called "hard core". I am not saying it doesn't happen, only that it was never part of my personal experience.
Yep, that was my experience in various Idaho prisons as well.

Way too easy for prisoners to find someone willing to consent to sex, there was no need for anyone to force it on anyone else.

Although its fair to question whether people are really consenting when they voluntarily engage in sex to pay off debts and what not... but that's pretty preventable: don't gamble.
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  #134  
Old 01-16-2014, 03:02 PM
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... I should point out that I DEFINITELY HAVE seen on several occasions an otherwise straight man manipulated into sexual favors ... but not through physical force. It is also my observation that unwanted sexual encounters are more prevalent in the county jails than in prison. Not sure why that is, but that is the perception I had.
I spent my time in county and I saw what you describe. I had one guy try to manipulate me but I wasn't having it and he backed off. I was in minimum (def not "hardcore") and guys don't wanna fuck that up and end up somewhere worse. We also had several dudes in there for CP, they had it rough and would generally not shower much to keep dudes away
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  #135  
Old 01-17-2014, 04:25 PM
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Never seen rape happen in prison. Gay relationships happened often though. It's one of those movie myths again.
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  #136  
Old 01-22-2014, 06:08 AM
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I have someone who has been in federal for a number of years. He started in high security facilities and worked hard to get his score reduced to medium. He told me that in the high/max security facilities the myths about 'turned out' do happen. In the lower security facilities, not so much because getting caught means transfer to the high security facilities, where they can become the victims.
In, general, if you don't act like a victim, use your head, and keep a low profile, you won't wind up a victim.
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  #137  
Old 01-22-2014, 06:30 AM
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Hey, just want to add, my son says the same thing, there are too many who will give it up, rape doesn't happen, he is in a correctional facility in Florida (19-24 yr olds), he says too much other stuff goes on.
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  #138  
Old 03-01-2014, 02:24 AM
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My baby says what everyone else has said.. no rape.. lots of consensual sex.. also there are a lot of predators (old heads) sizing up newbies and young boys..
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  #139  
Old 03-27-2014, 03:09 PM
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low security - 1 percent chance
medium security - 5 percent chance
Medium/high - 30 percent chance
High security - 5 percent chance
Super Max - no chance
Rarely happens, just add 50 percent prior to 1995
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  #140  
Old 03-27-2014, 03:32 PM
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There's only one incident that my LO told me about and that was like 3-4 years ago. So, it doesn't happen as often as media would lead you to believe.
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