A strange request from a new pen pal

rupert81 · #1 10-31-2019, 09:10 AM

Last week, I reached out to a new pen pal listed on a major pen pal website and sent an introductory email. He responded a couple of days later with quite a curt Jpay message which read:

"I need to know your real because someone catfished me the entire time i was on the site so please excuse me for being this way just need some conformation that your real.. maybe a number to call and take a pic drinking a cup of coffee."

I thought this a little odd, and the email was so curt that I said to myself: okay, maybe this guy doesn't really want me as a pen pal, and I am certainly not going to push myself on him. Then on reflection, I considered that perhaps he did have a negative experience, so why not see if I can bring something more positive to his life. A little reluctantly, I took a selfie of me drinking coffee in my office, as requested, and sent him my cell phone number as well.

Then this morning, I received the following response:

"Ok thank you for that i also want you to take a pic in your car or on the train or bus whatever your means of transportation you'll know why if you decide to do it very soon. i will call as soon as i get sum money on the phone thank you talk to you soon."

I am definitely not sending him this second requested photo of me in my car nor in any other vehicle. My guard is up and I see red flags here. Am I being too suspicious or unreasonable?

4Bobby · #2 10-31-2019, 09:18 AM

Maybe it's just me but I find this VERY creepy. I don't think you are being suspicious or unreasonable at all.

lolo21216 · #3 10-31-2019, 09:30 AM

Yikes!

Like I'm sure "catfishing" happens, not just in prison, but his requests seem creepy, especially since they are right off the bat. Kinda makes it seem like looks are way too important to this individual, seems shallow.

I'd keep your guard up and keep it moving, there are other potential pen-pals out there.

Ricoluv29 · #4 10-31-2019, 10:35 AM

I find this creepy as well but me being me Id probably try to enlighten his mood by taking a picture in like a childs car or something that's obviously a joke. If hes still giving weird vibes I would just not talk to him.

Stillwater · #5 10-31-2019, 10:51 AM

I would walk away. I’m sorry they had a bad experience but that is too demanding for me.
Like Lolo said, there’s 1000s more looking for pen pals. Don’t over think a red flag like this.

rupert81 · #6 10-31-2019, 11:13 AM

Thanks for all these responses -- there certainly seems agreement that all of this is bizarre and perhaps creepy, and that I should not continue to entertain these requests. That said, a more "sinister" motive crossed my mind than a pen pal who is merely being demanding and maybe a bit creepy. Is it possible that this inmate seeks out pen pals, collects "natural" looking photos/selfies of them, their cell phone numbers and then uses these to set up fake online profiles or otherwise use these identities fraudulently online? Obviously it's hard for him to do that from prison alone, but presuming they have a partner on the outside...

**maytayah** · #7 10-31-2019, 11:41 AM

Cat fishing does happen amongst penpals on both sides. Although unless there is prospects of a relationship or money is changing hands this all seems a little paranoid and creepy as well as controlling.
I would definitely not send anymore pictures or any more personal information about yourself.
If you want this person as a penpal let them know you are only interested in correspondence as a penpal and your won’t be responding to anymore demands.
I would probably look for a new penpal too many red flags here.

Ang613 · #8 10-31-2019, 01:36 PM

Maybe he just wanted a second picture of you in the background he chose just to confirm u didn’t find the first pic online somewhere? Not sure what to make of that.

studebaker71 · #9 10-31-2019, 02:29 PM

two factor authentication hahah this guys a dipshit hahahahh

MizzyMuffling · #10 10-31-2019, 03:54 PM

Tell him to shove it. He should be thankful for people writing him.

kellydavid410 · #11 10-31-2019, 04:13 PM

I agree. He can shove it. He is super creepy

**fbopnomore** · #12 10-31-2019, 05:15 PM

My advice, drop your new pen pal. Unfortunately pretty much anything is possible from inmate scammers.

rmc50 · #13 11-05-2019, 04:13 PM

I believe this line sums it up: i will call as soon as i get sum money

It looks like a ploy to get money out of you. Minimal amount of effort for the maximum amount of gain.

R. Mc.

e-Tex · #14 11-23-2019, 10:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MizzyMuffling

Tell him to shove it. He should be thankful for people writing him.

This is worth repeating.

Find a pen pal that actually likes the fact someone took time out of their day, just to brighten theirs.

redtop43 · #15 11-28-2019, 12:03 AM

I'm sympathetic to the catfishing issue, but one photo should be enough to do it. If that's what he wants, he could ask you to write his name on a piece of paper and hold it up.

Someone who has already shown they can be dangerous in one way or another should be sensitive to wanting to give you a comfort level.

Taliba00 · #16 12-02-2019, 11:14 PM

OP:

"He who, being reduced by affliction to the state of an inert and passive thing, returns, at least for a time, to the state of a human being, through the generosity of others, such a one, if he knows how to accept and feel the true essence of this generosity, receives at the very instant a soul begotten exclusively of charity. He is born from on high of water and of the Spirit... He from whom the act of generosity proceeds can only behave as he does if his thought transports him into the other. At such a moment he also consists only of water and of the Spirit."

This pen pal's response was not of water and the Spirit (give "sum money" in exchange for compassion?). Remember, affliction can rob a man of faith in any good.