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View Poll Results: Do you have an "official" day you got together?
Yes, the day we said we loved each other 9 13.85%
Yes, we decided on a date 20 30.77%
Yes, other 16 24.62%
No, we do not have an official day 7 10.77%
No, it's just understood that we are 6 9.23%
No, we're not together yet 7 10.77%
Voters: 65. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 05-20-2018, 06:21 PM
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Default MWI and RWI: Mini anniversaries

RWI= Reconnected While Incarcerated

I knew my husband before he went to prison, but we had lost touch for ten years before I found him again. As such, in some ways, at least for the purposes of this thread/poll, I feel like I would identify more here.

You know how most couples have those mini anniversaries? Like the day they started dating. The day they became exclusive. I don't really have those, and I'd imagine a lot of MWI relationships don't have those either.

M literally wrote saying he loved me a couple of letters before he asked me to marry him. As we are RWI not MWI I did accept then, though my unusual circumstances of being married at the time to a terminally ill man meant that I accepted for him to be my next husband (my late husband was fine with this.) But we were doing some thinking and wondering WHEN our relationship could be considered as having started. My late husband didn't die until about three and a half years after M told me he loved me. We married 14 months after my late husband died and a LOT of people got on my case about it. Those who were in the know did not.

For he and I, and our families, we consider it to be from he got the letter where I responded that I loved him back. That would make us having been together since late December 2012.

To people who would not be understanding as much, we basically say April 2016 (when my late husband died.)

But this got me thinking: Do you MWI people have any particular dates to use for when you got together? Did you ever literally just decide to be a couple, or was it more of a mutual understanding?
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Sarianna (05-21-2018)
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Old 05-20-2018, 09:48 PM
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We probably do have a date, but neither of us know it. We just say that we got together after a phone call that put everything out there. But after five years and "first phone call", "first visit", "engagement" first this, first that dates, we pretty much scrapped them all and only celebrate our wedding anniversary. In fact, sometimes it gets hard to remember exactly when what happened because we wrote for over a year before we brought up dating. Phone calls happened before that and visit shortly after. So it's all a bit soupy.
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xolady (06-01-2018)
Old 05-21-2018, 12:29 AM
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I picked the date where he told me for the first time "I'm so in love with you"... so that's my date
Follow your heart but take your brain with you...
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Old 05-21-2018, 04:16 AM
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We have our wedding anniversary but also the date our proper r'ship started
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Old 05-25-2018, 05:03 AM
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This thread made me smile. We have our 'first met' date which is actually next week. This is the date A got my first email from the writeaprisoner website. And then we have our official start of a romantic relationship which is September 25th 2017. We had been writing for around 4 months, talking on the phone for about a month and then had a phone call one night after I came home from a holiday where he told me what I already knew in my heart.....he was an innocent man wrongfully convicted of a horrible crime. I knew I had to tell him that night how I felt about him. It was pretty intense and very very emotional for both of us. A couple of days later I got an e-message from him saying...."So does this mean you're my girlfriend now?" Haha and I responded..."YES I'd love to be your girlfriend." He always says that's not the question he asked hahaha fecker.... but he's so happy I answered that way. The innocence project are investigating his case and although they haven't officially accepted to represent him yet we have a lot of hope for his exoneration. He's currently serving LWOP :-( but I've made it so that I can visit at least 4 times a year. X
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maytayah (05-30-2018)
Old 05-25-2018, 06:16 AM
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Billy and I are also RWI, since we knew each other before his incarceration. We reunited back in November of last year and have been happy with our relationship ever since. I don't really know that we have an exact date that we decided to commit to each other fully, it was just kind of understood. I am planning on moving to the state he is in to make things easier and we are planning on spending the rest of our lives together.

We both have some issues that needs to be handled though before marriage is possible, but it's understood between us that it will happen, just not sure when. He has not officially proposed, but already refers to me as his "wife" most times. Everyone that we know including family and friends know that we are a couple and will remain so regardless of their opinions. Some are accepting, others not so much. We just don't let it get to us.

For now though, I'm able to get out there about twice a year to see him, my next visit should be in July barring anything happening. My daughter is due to deliver my grandson mid July, so if all goes well by the end of the month I'll be visiting Billy again after his birth.
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maytayah (05-30-2018)
Old 05-25-2018, 09:16 PM
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He came into my life in March of 2011, but we didn't become a couple until May of 2012. We couldn't remember which day exactly, so we picked today. But this day has fallen by the wayside the last couple of years. I totally forgot about it last year as did he (It was June before I realized) and I almost forgot about it this year until I read your thread. We didn't do anything for one another and we didn't talk on the phone. Sounds depressing, I suppose, but it's really no big deal. Which is funny because I used to lose my mind if he forgot.
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Sarianna (05-26-2018)
Old 05-26-2018, 02:35 AM
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I popped into his life with a Christmas Card in December 2014 - we became a couple somewhere in late 2015, went through some stuff and back-pedalled to being "just friends" a couple of months later....and then back to the relationship status with serious commitment I guess in spring 2016. Well, this is my story anyway - I think he's always figured our date is 12/2015

We don't really celebrate any dates except that around Christmas time every years we're like "ooh, can you believe it's X amount of years already?". We did get engaged in November last year so that's a more official date that I guess we'll see if either one of us will remember this coming November Not really fussy about these dates myself, although if and when we get married THAT will be a date I will want to celebrate

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Old 06-03-2018, 03:22 AM
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Five months yesterday! We made our relationship official January 2, 2018.
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Old 06-13-2018, 10:54 PM
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We started our friendship around Christmas. I sent him a Hanukkah card to cheer him up. No, we don’t celebrate Hanukkah but he always hated Christmas so I sent him something different to make him smile.

Anyway, up until we got married we celebrated our anniversary as “Christmukkah” every year. Now we can celebrate our wedding anniversary
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Old 06-27-2018, 08:40 AM
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We have a date, the date of our first visit, we had been writing for a few months, feelings were there but during our first visit, our first kiss and the first time we said I love you.. that is our date!
When we get married that will be our new date
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