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Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison For everyone who has a husband, boyfriend or male partner incarcerated.

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  #1  
Old 03-12-2012, 10:52 PM
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Default Anyone tried to talk you out of your relationship?

At tha begining certain ppl did not want me waitn for him..it messed wit me sooo much that I myself was havn second thoughts ..but I came to realize this is who I wana spend my life with...and if i have to wait then so be it.....thats wat im gonna do..this is my life not theirs...
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Old 03-12-2012, 10:54 PM
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thats good. nobody should mk you feel that way, if they can than ur bond was never strong enough.
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Old 03-12-2012, 10:55 PM
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Almost everyone. But this is my life not theirs. They don't know how I really feel. People wi always have something to say but it all changes when they are in situation. As long as you both are happy no one else matters
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Old 03-12-2012, 10:55 PM
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There are only two people in your relationship: you and your man. Other opinions are irrelevant, I had to accept that before I could accept him as other half. People tried to put their two cents in, but I made it very clear from day one: don't give me advice on my relationship if you don't have one of your own that I can respect.
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Old 03-12-2012, 10:58 PM
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everyone even his dad tried to talk me otu of it. haha now they are happy i waited for him
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Old 03-12-2012, 10:59 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Freethadonfella View Post
At tha begining certain ppl did not want me waitn for him..it messed wit me sooo much that I myself was havn second thoughts ..but I came to realize this is who I wana spend my life with...and if i have to wait then so be it.....thats wat im gonna do..this is my life not theirs...
Nobody talks me out of anything. I live my life for me and if those around do not like it, so be it. I am not about to live my life to make others happy.

If my man makes me happy, there is not a sole in the world that is going to change that, except he and I. Our love is based on communication, trust, love and respect.

Do not let others dictate how you live your life, or who you choose to love. Be true to yourself and life will treat you kind, well for the most part. We all have ups and downs, but I believe everything we go through is designed to teach us something.

Peace~
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  #7  
Old 03-12-2012, 11:00 PM
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I have only had one person try to talk me out of my relationship and can't believe he even had the nerve to contact me. That was my uncle who molested me as a child. I simply told him that his opinion didn't matter and my position of not wanting anything to do with him hasn't changed. I am blessed that all of the people I love and care about support the relationship and say that as long as I am happy they will be happy.
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Old 03-12-2012, 11:00 PM
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Yeah in a way. My ex friend katie and her fiance jennifer. He is not the reason that we are no longer friends though. Others either not there preference or are actually being supportive whether accepting or again not there preference.
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Old 03-12-2012, 11:17 PM
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people her prison or jail and automatically think loser and think they have the right to put in their 2 cents. will always be that way. all that matters is that you do what u want and whats best for u.
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  #10  
Old 03-13-2012, 12:17 AM
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Yeah at first some people in my family tried and some friends tried to talk me out of it. But only because they want to see me happy, but ultimately as time went on they realized he was what made me happy and learned to accept it.
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Old 03-13-2012, 12:31 AM
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My sister tried but hell whats new. She know I don't listen to her at all. You don't get to sleep with my boyfriends then have an opinion about who I should and shouldn't be with. I think she finally understand he is going to be in my life but even still sometimes she is caught saying something under her breathe when he comes up. Like I tell her though you need to stop trying to taste my cat and go find a man of your own. She is definitely one of them that loves misery and don't want to see no one happy. She feel she is the oldest so she is suppose to be the first one to get married and stuff like that.
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Old 03-13-2012, 12:40 AM
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Time and time again.. Buuuut what's new, I used to feel that way havin second thoughts but what it all boiled down to was my happiness, I don't see anyone who cares to hear my problems the way he does, he takes all my imperfections & loves me unconditionally, he was there for me maybe not in the beginning but through time our relationship formed to an everlasting friendship.. People who don't know what it is we deal with will never fully understand our situations as women with these men locked up.. Just because they messed up it shouldn't define who they are for the struggles or mishaps they're facing.. My family knows I won't take their perspective into consideration cause they don't know him the way I do.. As long as I know where his heart, love & loyalties lie thats all that matters to me at the end of the day..

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Old 03-13-2012, 01:22 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Freethadonfella
At tha begining certain ppl did not want me waitn for him..it messed wit me sooo much that I myself was havn second thoughts ..but I came to realize this is who I wana spend my life with...and if i have to wait then so be it.....thats wat im gonna do..this is my life not theirs...
I said the same thing...if its a mistake then its mine to make...i will have to deal with the consequences...
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Old 03-13-2012, 01:56 AM
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Not when he's locked up, but when he's out certain family members on both sides try to talk us out of being with the other. I'm not sure why they would when they claim to be happy with their lives. People do some say some crazy crap though, but that's only if you listen to them. I've learned to tune out most of the garbage that flies out of peoples mouth when it's not coming from a good place. Trust me, you'll know when someone is being sincere. I'm sure even non-DOC relationships go through that too, there always has to be a "hater."
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  #15  
Old 03-13-2012, 04:04 AM
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Yes and for the most part I cut those people out of my life or limit my contact with them.
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  #16  
Old 03-13-2012, 05:59 AM
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Yes, my parents, sister and some friends do all the time. Its nice to have the few that do support us!
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  #17  
Old 03-13-2012, 07:05 AM
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Yup, everyone around me. Took a couple of months to realize this was real, and I wasn't leaving him NO matter what!! It's nice knowing my relationship is doing better than some of my friends. I don't say anything but I see!

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Old 03-13-2012, 07:24 AM
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A lot of people did, from my good friends to my parents. However once I put my foot down and explained to them that I wasn't leaving him no matter what and why on earth would they talk me out of something that made me so happy if they loved me made them rethink their words. It doesn't come up anymore despite their opinions. All I get from them is encouragement and that helps out a lot.
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Old 03-13-2012, 08:27 AM
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I am pretty lucky when it comes to my family and close friends because they have not tried to talk me out of anything in regards to my man. It's probably because they know me so well that trying to talk me out of anything is a waste of time and their breath and not only that but bad talking my man will result in the wrath of my fury LOL Only me and his mama can talk bad about him, better leave my man alone!
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  #20  
Old 03-13-2012, 08:55 AM
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A couple "friends" tried to talk me out of staying. I know my parents don't like the whole situation but they have been very supportive. For anyone who questioned why I'm staying my answer is"I love him end of story". I know that some people don't approve but they keep their opinions to themselves and I appreciate that because I have enough to deal with and don't need their opinions!!
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  #21  
Old 03-13-2012, 01:24 PM
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There's always going to be that one person giving us reasons why we shouldn't wait for our men, but you know i've come to realize that those people are usually the one's that are either disatisfied with their own relationships or don't like to see others happy. The only people i hear out are my parents only because it's normal for them to want me to be with someone THEY view as better. Other than them I don't let anyone try to talk me out of my Wonderfully unique relationship. This is the life i'm choosing and like your self i'm happy and perfectly content in waiting for my man.
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  #22  
Old 03-13-2012, 02:38 PM
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Sure. I understand that this relationship surprised and worried folks. Hell, it surprised and worried me for a long while. Those that are respectful about it are my friends. Those that aren't are out of my life.
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  #23  
Old 03-13-2012, 03:03 PM
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My dad is dead set against me being with my guy. He thinks its foolish of me to send him money when I could be saving my money or spending it on me. I don't really care though what anyone thinks because I have been in love with my man for a long time.

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Old 03-13-2012, 03:08 PM
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Nope.. actually we've had a lot of wonderful support lately .. very encouraging )
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  #25  
Old 03-13-2012, 03:12 PM
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Yes all the time. I hate when someone other than myself brings up the fact that my man is locked up. Their first reaction is always the whole..,"Why?" & "You can do so much better.."..I don't really let it bother me so much anymore. I realize that those closest to me will have their opinion be it good or bad.. I let them make their speech, hear them go on & on about how he's using me & how he doesn't really love me... I actually find it humorous when they assume they know exactly what my relationship is about when in fact they know nothing For me, the only opinion that matters is mine.
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