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  #26  
Old 01-26-2005, 06:05 PM
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I have two daughters one 22 and the other 26. The 22 y/o has been abused by several boyfriends,the worst was the one that punched her in the stomach when she thought she was pregnant. This same (so called man) also inticed her into stealing a prescription pad from a dentist office so he could go on a forgery spree to get the drug Oxycontin. When she was caught she bore the full brunt of the charges and is now serving time in state prision because she wouldn't implacate him in the crime. I guess there is all kinds of justice in this world though. Just before this past Thanksgiving he supposedly was so wrought with guilt because of her being in prision the he blew his own brains out. I found out later though that his ripped off a drug dealer and was so scared of the dealer killing him that he did it himself (one of the few things he ever did right). My 26 y/o pld is married to one of the most useless men I have ever known. The man is 30 years old and has not worked a total of 6 months his entire life. Over the past 6 or 7 months the DV between him and my daughter had escalated to the point that I am afraid for her and my grandchildrens lives. He has been arrested about 4 times in the past 6 months but the court system keeps letting him out and my appearently near brain dead daughter(jk) keeps taking him back because he swears to never do it again. I've talked to her time and time again about his problem but she believes that he will change. Any advice On what I might be able to say to her to get her to wake up and smell the coffee would be greatly appreciated. As for myself I don't understand why a man feels that it is neccesary to beat the woman he supposedly loves. Not once did I ever strike thier mother or them for that matter.
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  #27  
Old 02-03-2005, 01:28 PM
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Ohhh...that poem sent chills running throughout my entire body-what a poem...im speechless...
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  #28  
Old 02-03-2005, 01:35 PM
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WVdaddy-IM SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT ALL THE DRAMA YOUR DAUGHTERS HAVE HAD TO DEAL WITH DUE TO THIER B/F, HUSBAND. THIER ARE HELP LINES OUT THIER THAT YOUR (MARRIED) DAUGHTER MIGHT WANT TO CALL-THE WOMEN HAVE ALL BEEN IN THE SAME SITUATIONS AND CAN HELP HER 2 UNDERSTAND WHATS GOING ON-AND THEY CAN HELP HER GET OUT BEFORE ITS TO LATE. SHE IS LUCKY TO HAVE A MOMMA WHO IS AS CARING AS YOURSELF-SOME WOMEN DONT HAVE THAT IN THIER LIVES, AND DUE TO THAT THEY CAN FEEL "STUCK" OR EVEN HELPLESS. IM GOING TO LOOK UP SOME WEB-SITES 4 U, AND ILL GET BACK TO YOU ON THIS ONE-UNTIL THEN...
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  #29  
Old 02-04-2005, 07:24 AM
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That is such a beautiful, but sad, poem.........
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  #30  
Old 03-07-2005, 05:18 PM
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Wow, that poem hit me hard. I am currently leaving that kind of relationship right now. I have been with my bf for 4 yrs and have been dealing with the abuse for about 3 yrs. After the second attack I had had it. I now have a restraining order on him and I am sooo relieved. I have 2 kids and as hard as it is I am on my own. My thought is I don't want my daughter to think its ok to let some one beat and verbaly abuse her and I don't want my son to think is ok to treat a woman like that. For all the woman who are going throuh this, I pray for you.
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  #31  
Old 03-11-2005, 04:50 PM
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U Have All Been Through Soo Much Drama...my Hugs And Prayers Go Out To U All!
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  #32  
Old 03-12-2005, 11:24 AM
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Growing up I believed women who stayed in violent relationship's were either stupid or insane,until I turned 17 and found myself in their shoes and I felt the same fear that all victim's do,I finally understood why they stay.

Official figures say women usually endure an average of 35 beatings before they find the courage to leave for good.

My ex spent a long time wearing me down with emotional abuse first to the point I was grateful to him for everything,simply because I was stupid,fat,useless,ugly,nobody would want me,all the things they want us to believe.From then he could do whatever he wanted and boy was he good,he even had my family believing he was the victim in all of it.

I got beaten for smiling at someone,or wanting to get a job,he never let me out of his sight 24/7 for a 7 year period.We lived in one room of a shared house for 7 years and he never let me speak to anyone else unless he was there,if I cooked,he sat in the kitchen with me.
I had 7 miscarriages because he wouldn't let me have birth control,but would beat me as soon as I got pregnant,for me it came to a head when he was becoming sexually violent and threatening to slit my throat during sex.
Suddenly the light finally went on in my head and I knew that I was better than that,I'd done nothing to deserve his violence and he was sick.

I recruited the help of a mutual friend(his boss),who herself had escaped a violent marriage,she found me a home across the country from him and I started my life over again.

It's been 10 year's since I escaped him and I am grateful for the life I have now.

It's all very well resources being made available to victim's of domestic violence,but by the time help is needed,the victim has usually been brainwashed in some way so they think either they are to blame for their partner's outburst's,or that things will get better,but they don't.

I wish I'd listened to my dad,he alway's told me,if a man hits you once,he will do it again,get out the first time.

Thankyou for posting the poem,I'd read it before,but it's alway's good to bring these subject's to people's attention.
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  #33  
Old 04-22-2005, 03:56 PM
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I got this poem in an email.. from my (extremely abusive) exhusband's new wife!

I wrote her back asking her straight up, WTF?... i think hse needsa building to fall on her head... and she knows how it was for he and i .. and she isnt some young twit, either, but a mature woman that should see the obvious... well now that he's hittin the sauce again.... I guess I can say a prayer for her, too.
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  #34  
Old 04-25-2005, 05:46 PM
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Excellent poem!! Thank you for sharing
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  #35  
Old 05-20-2005, 05:44 PM
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I used to work at a battered women's shelter. There is more truth than poetry to that poem.

Thank you for posting this.
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  #36  
Old 06-11-2005, 01:24 AM
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i am that person...in the poem... i was 15 when i got married. I had nothing, i was on the streets alone and broke. when i met him it seemed a godsend, he opened doors, made sure i had food and a roof over my head. flowers everyday and a proposal over a microphone at a pooldeck spring break party in front of hundreds of people.he had a house a car and a good job and so i said yes... he had told me he had hit his x wife one time because she tried to hit him with a frying pan. i believed it all, then we got married...
i found out his house was his friends that was away for 6 months. he had broken in and made a spare key. Same with the car, and his job was nothing more than running a gocart track for 5.15 and hr. the first time he ever put his hands on me was after i had found us a house and he was upset that he "failed" me.... so he through me accross a room and i hit my head on a lawnmowerblade. that kind of pushing shoving went on for about a month before he got drunk and wiped a parking lot clean with my face untill his best friend stopped him. after that it was like clockwork... every other night... a punch in the face...etc. then one night i guess i was talking in my sleep and i woke up to him punching me because i had said something about missing sombody.... of course then i had to stay up untill he feel asleep which was sometimes 2 or 3 days.once we moved to miami everything was ok again. no fighting no abuse nothing ... untill he lost his job.i remember waking up one night to him ranting about me cheating on himand being held against a wall for three hours with his thumbs pressed into my throat untill i was uncontious.well the same guy who stopped him before moved down with us and once again stopped him from killing me. 2 days later he was in jail for a year... when he got out. he found me and i went back... i was only 17 then and was still under the he does it cause he loves me and its all my fault cloud.we moved to CT 5 months later and he ended up paying somewomen to jump me. CT is a womans state so he wouldnt touch me there... untill he got drunk 4 days later and put a 5 inch deap dent in the side of a dryer with my head... so i finally left him. hes back in jail now. the sad thing is ...i still love him.... so hey who knows but for any women out there that are with someone.... love is suposed to feel god .. not hurt, so if he disprespects you in any way... leave dont think you are bad tell him to f... off you are way more meaning full that anything else... good luck
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  #37  
Old 06-11-2005, 09:49 AM
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Wow, inlifesshadow, I am so sorry for the pain you had to endure and very thankful that you're still here to tell us your story. I'm glad that you got out even if you had a broken heart. your life is more important! I wish you the best of luck. Take care, Karla
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  #38  
Old 06-11-2005, 01:50 PM
inlifesshadow inlifesshadow is offline
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Thank you
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  #39  
Old 08-02-2005, 02:56 PM
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this is a very powerful poem, I recieved a copy of it a few years back when I was living in a women's shelter. I kept a cop in my purse for almost a year and every time that I wanted to call him or see him it helped. Thanks for sharing this.
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  #40  
Old 09-08-2005, 06:28 PM
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This poem hit home for me. I can't wait to share it with my step-mom. She will now understand why she came to my house and found flowers in the garbage. I am so glad that I got out.

If there's anything I can go to help anyone going through dv, please PM me.
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  #41  
Old 10-04-2005, 12:30 AM
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my husband becomes very violent when he drinks.He has two d.v. convictions and a conviction for busting out a cops window, he is currently in jail on a probation violation and heading to chino for an evaulation before sentencing in jan.2006.the last conviction was he made a threat to commit body harm to his mother and she recorded it and turned him in.He has again promised to stop drinking this time for good .he begs me for another chance.i still love him after 12 years of marriage cause i see and know the goods things he is when alcohol doesnt touch his lips.Im financially setup due to a inheratence.He wants me to hire him an arrorney .i dont know what to do .i just know i miss him and his kids are missing him too.zach is 11 years old and julia is 5 .anybody have any thoughts on this ???
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  #42  
Old 10-04-2005, 01:48 AM
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That is an eye-opening poem for any woman....for those women who have been subjected to abuse and still question whether they should get out....getting out while you can leave on your own two feet is better than being carried out by six pair of feet....I think this poem needs to be recirculated again via e-mail for someone that may not have seen it ....God be with you all

To bullittgirl: I know his children may miss him...but they will miss you more....also I was always told that you can determine how a man will treat you by the way he treats his mother.

When I was in high school there was a poem that I thought was cute but it was also powerpacked with meaning in regard to affairs of the heart...I forgot who the author was but I always remember the poem:

"I placed my hand upon my heart

And swore that we would never part.

I wonder what I would have said
If I would have placed it on my head."
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  #43  
Old 10-09-2005, 09:40 AM
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Bullittgirl - It's a very difficult decision, I know I lived through it. He can still be a part of the kids lives and not be part of yours. There are some men that change, but it does require counseling and the will to change - much more than saying I will change. Make the decision that is truly best for you and the kids.
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  #44  
Old 10-09-2005, 11:12 AM
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it makes me want to cry.....
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  #45  
Old 10-09-2005, 04:46 PM
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I am printing a copy of this to send to my sister. She just recently left a bad and abusive relationship. He left her alone for the first couple of weeks, but now he is calling 20-50 times a day, he has broken into her apartment twice, and he is stalking her at work. She is afraid to go home to her apartment ( she rents a basement from a friend from work and her family) because she is afraid he will do harm to them. He sent her a dozen long stem red roses to her place of employment earlier this week. She went to talk to the police after he broke into her apartment again yesterday, and they said there was nothing they could do to help her. I'm afraid for her......She is going to try to get a PPO against him tomorrow, but I don't know what kind of concrete evidence they need. She has left him, and he won't leave her alone.

I'm going to send her a copy of this poem, it gave me goosebumps!!

Pray for us!
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  #46  
Old 10-09-2005, 05:07 PM
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That did make me cry and brought back memories of my beloved sister Cynthia who passed away this last jan3rd, but not from a beating altough thru out her marrage thats all she got. She no longer had any self asteam left and set out to distroy herself which she did. Evan after reaching out to her on many occations she still couldn't see the light. So on January 3, 2005 she over dosed on pain medications. I miss her so and wish life could of been better for her. I pray now that she has found her peace that she had looked for so many years. My love will always be with her. Thank you for sharing that poem. I just wish and pray women read and hear it for thier own sakes.
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  #47  
Old 10-09-2005, 05:17 PM
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Wow! that poem sent chills up my spine and gave me flashbacks from memories that ive been trying to bury....my sister is 20 and has been in an abusive relationship for 6 yrs now and i used to see him hitting on her all the time..this poem hits close to home!! very deep.
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  #48  
Old 10-10-2005, 12:12 AM
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thank you for letting me read this poem, its so hard cause i can be that woman in that poem right now, only difference is im still alive, please pray that God helps me and i be given better discernment on what to do, im on a dilemma right now.
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Old 10-10-2005, 08:05 AM
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Old 10-23-2005, 01:13 PM
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Exclamation In time, I begain to hate the flowers

Hello All,

I was in a very emotionally/verbally abusive relationship with a man I could not find the strength to leave, and I consider myself a very very strong woman with a very high self esteem and I AM STRONG AND I ALWAYS LOVED MYSELF EVEN DURING THE ABUSE. I KNEW IT WAS HIM WHO HAD ISSUES, BUT I DID NOT KNOW HOW TO HELP HIM WITHOUT HURTING HIS CAREER.

It was my love for him that kept me in the relationship for so long. I could see that he was mentally ill and he took his anger and rage out on me for the stupidest things.

We are both in the military and were at the time of the abuse so the first time he tried to get violent, I threatened to turn him into our chain of command if he ever put a bruise on me and at the time I had a look in my eye like, "don't F_ck with me or else" so he believed it. The military would have eaten him alive and he would have lost his "Golden Boy" status so this was a real threat to him.

At the time, I was very fearful inside and I was only bluffing him hard, but I convinced him so he never did hit me. I knew that I could not turn him in because I loved him and I felt like I had to protect him from them because if they knew what he was doing they would take him away and I felt like I could never be happy without him.

He began pushing me around real hard, but made sure I fell on something soft like the couch or bed. It made me so angry I would immediately get up and stare at him and not say a word until he backed down or left me alone, which infuriated him that I NEVER cowered to him. I could always tell he ALWAYS wanted to rip my head off because I was so strong and I did not fear him because he wisely showed restraint from violence even when he was very very drunk which was became an everyday thing.


What he could not due in violence, he well made up for it in verbal/emotional abuse. If you think that it cannot physically hurt you, you are so very wrong. If you do not have that sick deep love for your abuser, than maybe the verbal/emotional abuse will not hurt you as much, but I as strong as I was I clinged to every word that came out of his mouth and he cut me to the core on a daily basis. He could see that he hurt me deeply as I would always break down in uncontrollable crying because the pain was so intense. How could someone who you loved so deeply say hateful terrible things just to cause so much intense pain? I never had been with another man and I never ever wanted to be with anyone else. Why did he call me a whore, slut, cunt, bitch...which was well deserved since I stood up to him...I felt like a bitch. He knew that was not me. He also knew he was intently hurting me and I wanted to divorce him.

He threatened to kill himself if I left him. With his intense outrageous fits he threw over silly stuff, I believed he fit the profile of a man who would take his life if I left him so I stayed....way too long.

Eventually, my body broke down and after each daily episode of abuse, as I was crying myself to sleep, I prayed to God and pleaded with him to make a way for me out of this. I was miles away from family and friends and had just moved back to the States from being overseas she the majority of the intense abuse occurred.

I ended up over the next months with Fibromyalgia which has been one of the most horrible physical conditions to manage. YES, THIS HAPPENED DUE TO THE ABUSE. I started having headaches, tight muscles in my neck and shoulders, that I thought were just stress related. Then my arms started going numb and I had spells of intense fatigue that forced me to fall asleep. He would call me a "worthless piece of shit" as I was passing out from the fatigue because I was not going to be available for a few hours to watch our year old daughter.

By the way, all of the verbal/emotional abuse happened right in front of her with no regard for the fact that I was the mother she loved and adored.

I suffered terrible anxiety attacks and I thought I was having a heart attack and I struggled with depression because I longed for him to see how much I loved him and how I was suffering inside because I did not want to leave him alone. He was my world at the time.

After many bad episodes, he would send me flowers. Although the flowers were beautiful, they represented a time when he was well aware that he had intently hurt me and knew what he was doing was wrong.

They began to lose their effect and I began to hate the flowers.

He raped me one time the night before I went on a business trip out of town with some coworkers. I tried to get him to stop, but he was very drunk and I am sure he was angry as well, but he was out of his right mind and would not stop so I angrily let him finish, but I hated him for it. I am sure he did not remember.

Not surprisingly, I got a dozed of the most beautiful roses delivered to my hotel room. I hated those flowers for what they represented. My coworkers could not understand why I hated them since they were so beautiful. I did not bother to tell them, because I had to protect him....right? After all, I loved him to death...right, that is what love and forgiveness is all about righ?....or so I thought at the time.

He made sure he sent them when someone else would be there to see that he was such a wonderful husband was so caring that he sent his wife flowers, "like when I was at work, or when I was at home visiting my Mother" who thought what a nice man he was.

After leaving him over and over I started to develop positive relationships with other men at different times when I left and I learned I could be loved and accepted by someone else who was not so jealous, abusive, controlling, and disrespectful of a woman. I felt empowered to tell him about my male friends I had met so he could know what it felt like to be insecure after someone hurts you and violates your trust. Nothing happened, but I wanted him to feel like I was slipping away and I wanted him to finally accept that one day I would be out of his life for good.
-
I am in the military and so 85% - 95% of the time, my coworkers or friends are male so this is I do not have to hunt for someone to make him a little jealous so he would snap out of it. He had no reason to feel jealous before he hurt me, but he hurt me and the relationship was controlling and abusive from the first day after we were married. I have pictures of our honeymoon and my face was red with tears from him hurting me and making me cry......He just was not so intense in his anger until 5 years after we were married and he was forced by the he military to live in a cold climate he did to want to live in.....like it was my fault......
I had a few female friends before I married him, but he tried to sleep with all of them so I was too insecure to have female friends over to our home, unless they were married and their husbands accompanied them.

I never forgave him, but I wanted to marry him anyway since I was so deeply in love and he was my first.

He eventually got an assignment to Korea and he had to go by himself for a year. I was going to stay with the girls and move to Germany. He was going to move to Germany after he finished his job in Korea.

I divorced him right before he had to go so he could not fight me for custody.

He always threatened to take our 2 daughters from me and ruin my career if I left him.

I am just now after 12 years dealing with the pain, scars, and misery he left behind.

I am with my RD and hopefully final husband who I believe is my true "soul mate' that I never really knew existed until I met him and we talked. We knew we were meant to be together and it felt so very RIGHT.

I lived with my abuser for 7 years after the abuse and I had plenty of time to mentally start taking responsibility for my portion of the mistakes we BOTH made in our failed marriage. I discovered "Men are from Mars, and Women are from Venous." My boy was ALL MALE and he had no clue how to treat a woman since he was raised with 4 brothers, no sisters, and his mother was aggressive, controlling, and a gossiping busy body in the community. I have no doubt she caused a lot of his problems, or knew about them. I found out years later from him that she sent him to a Psychologist when he was a child because he was too hard to handle at home in his safe environment although he was an "Angel" in school and public.
I WISH I HAD KNOWN THAT ....BEFORE I MET OR MARRIED HIM.

HE MARRIED A STRONG WOMAN LIKE MOM AND HE TOTALLY REBELLED AND BECAME ABUSIVE TO ME AND WITH NO FATHER AROUND TO STOP THE ABUSE, IT GOT OUT OF HAND.

I WAS TOTALLY UNPREPARED TO HANDLE THIS MAN, BUT I DID ASK GOD FOR HIM .....BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU ASK FOR AND JUST BECAUSE YOU GET IT, DOES NOT MEAN IT IS GOOD FOR YOU.

My current husband is an educated man and yes, he has the brain to be abusive too, but he choses not to be abusive, and he never has been abusive to his ex wife or his mother who he treats so well. He has a BS in Psychology and a Masters in Social work. I am so proud of him for committing his life to helping children in abusive homes. He has helped convict many abusers and he knows what is inside of this sick ex husbands head and he has educated me so much.

I have also seen many therapist and I will continue therapy to deal with the trauma of abuse although my husband has been a tremendous help and ALWAYS takes the time to listen to me. It has been 12 years and it still hurts like it was yesterday. When will the pain of losing so much to a very sick man go away?

Do they deserve to go to jail when they emotionally abuse?

My ex has tried his best since our divorce to ruin my career through the "good old boy" system that is till alive and well.

He remarried quickly to an abusive female who had 3 other kids by 3 different fathers and she instantly took over the relationship with my girls when I had to deploy to Saudi Arabia for four months after 9/11 and treated them like I did not exist. Within two weeks of being in Germany after I left the country she was having my then 11 year old shave her legs and buying her a training bra and she was not ready for it yet. She wanted to be the one to give this first experience to my daughter as a Mommy/Daughter thing and he enjoyed telling me all about the experience on the phone like his new wife was so thoughtful.

I was sickened and u[upset and this was just the beginning of a ton of hurtful things they concocted for me. They moved within 300 yards of us even though I tired to stop it before I returned from Saudi.

Shortly after my return from the desert, he started telling my girls not to listen to me if they did not feel like it. He started having my oldest come to his home after school so I had to go to his house to get her or he would send her home when I got home in an attempt to know when I was coming and going. He told me he could hear my truck when I got home.

I reported the disruptions of my life to my Chaplin and my chain of command and I was given a new job 20 miles away and I was ordered to move away from him.

Fearful of me moving 20 miles away and unable to stop me since I had custody M-F and he only had weekend custody, with his new wife's wholehearted support, he lied his way into getting a German judge to giving him temporary custody of our daughters by painting me as an uncaring unfit mother.....(far from the truth) and telling the Judge that I was moving away from him to minimize his right to be with his kids.

The German Judge did not have a copy of our Oklahoma Agreed Divorce agreement in German and the Judge did not read or speak English so he only did what the my exhusband German Attorney told him and he granted the temporary custody. I moved from him without my daughters and hired my own German attorney to fight the custody. One year later he was allowed to leave the country with my daughters although the German court found me to be a fit parent, the girls had lived with him a year and they refused to decide custody but only granted him the right to leave the country with him so the US courts could decide custody. I picked up my youngest daughter upon advice from an Oklahoma attorney before school started....Their father was not home and in front of witnesses I was physically attacked form step mom who tried to pull my 3 year old out of my arms.I took her back to NC, but he came back from a business trip and hired an Florida Attorney and lied to him and told the Attorney that Germany gave him custody of our daughters when in all actuality the German court only granted him the right to leave the country with the girls until custody could be determined in the US. I already had an approved US custody order from Oklahoma. Florida should have never gotten involved in this case.I cannot live happily without my daughters and the pain of being separated from them is and has been overwhelmingly painful for all of us. My youngest was 3 when he had her taken off of me and it tore her up. He did not care how she felt, he wanted to hurt me. With every visit she had with me her little heart ached when she had to return to his home, no one will hear the voice and words of a small child and I am in tears just thinking about how much she has been hurt by her own father who projects himself to the world as such a loving parent. My oldest remembers the abuse well, but is sickly bonded to her strong, protected loving father who has tried everything in his power to alienate me from my girls. He will not allow phone calls except sometimes when he feels like it. He has refused visitation many times in Germany and nothing was done about it....

When he came to NC to get my daughter, while he was waiting a day or so to get her, I called him on his cell phone to make arrangements. He was so drunk he put down the phone without hanging up to spite me. I overheard him trying his best to convince a woman to go upstairs with him to his hotel room. I could not believe I had caught him cheating on his new wife while he was out of town to pick up our daughter.

SOME FAMILY MAN HE IS .....BUT SHE DEFINITELY DESERVES HIM WITH HER EVIL HEART.

It has been over 3.5 years, 4 jurisdictions, 4 attorneys later, and I am still fighting for them in a Florida court. I have had an attorney in Florida for 2 years now and fortunately for me, my exhusband original attorney has just dropped him a couple of months ago. "Irreconcilable differences' is what she stated in the petition. The Judge granted it and he hired a male attorney who has just taken over the case.

You want to know why Florida has had so many hurricanes this year?

I have sent my wrath to Florida and I will continue until they let my little girls go..... just joking, but that is how my husband and I feel.

My current husband hates the fact that such an abusive man has been able to successfully manipulate the court systems German/American with smoke, mirrors, and lies and is able to raise our daughters after being so terribly abusive to their mother.We pray for JUSTICE in this on going court case......

I have been in the military for 20 long years and I am retiring to heal my mind and body and to focus fully on getting well and fighting for my daughters. I still live in their hearts and they see signs of him abusing his current wife and they know he is NOT a good man from what they have seen. My oldest daughter use to think she wanted to marry a man like Daddy, but I told her to open her eyes and realize that is the exact reason why I am divorcing him....so she would not marry someone like him. She has decided since growing up on her own accord that it is very important to find a man who treats you well and does not fight with you, but will be supportive and listen.....like her Step Daddy

Even though like females do....they love their father to death and are fiercely loyal to him . I have never done anything to interfere with their relationship with him since he is their father and they deserve some sort of relationship with him separate from my interference. I am convinced he will screw it up all by himself and it is not my place to do anything to destroy it. They need to know for a healthy self esteem they are loved by BOTH parents and the are well aware of that despite his vain efforts to destroy our relationship...it has only strengthened it as they see how much of a priority I make them and how hard I WILL continue to fight for them. They will be having my Grand babies and I love my children....they are our future and we will live forever through them.

Unfortunately, the apple does not fall far from the tree....the court must intervene.....and minimize give them back to me so we can re balance the relationship and he HAS TO BE REPRIMANDED FOR THE ACTIONS HE HAS TAKEN AGAINST HIS OWN DAUGHTERS VIA THEIR MOTHER.

HE MUST BE ORDERED TO GET LONG TERM THERAPY.

I AM A WONDERFUL MOTHER AND I LOVE MY DAUGHTERS WITH ALL OF MY HEART. THAT IS WHY I LEFT THEIR DAD SO THEY WOULD KNOW THAT A WOMAN CANNOT STAY IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP AND SURVIVE FOR THE SAKE OF THE GIRLS. A MOTHER MUST LEAVE HER ABUSER TO SEND THE STRONG MESSAGE TO THE CHILDREN AND LET THEM KNOW THAT THE BEHAVIOR OF THEIR FATHER IS UNACCEPTABLE AND IT IS HIS RESPONSIBILITY TO FIX HIMSELF, AND NOT MY RESPONSIBILITY ANYMORE.
IF HE TRULY LOVED HIS DAUGHTERS HE WOULD LOVE THEIR MOTHER WHETHER WE ARE DIVORCED OR NOT AND HE NEVER REALLY DID LOVE ME LIKE I LOVED HIM.


I PRAY YOU WILL FIND THE STRENGTH TO LEAVE YOUR ABUSER NOW, IF YOU ARE GETTING FLOWERS.

IF IT IS NOT POSSIBLE, PRAY, PRAY, PRAY, AND RELENTLESSLY FIND A WAY OUT.

HE WILL CHANGE.....He will get WORSE... ...and it is only a matter of time before you will wake up and realize you don't deserve to be treated like that, OR YOU WON'T WAKE UP AT ALL .

FORCE A CHANGE IN YOUR OWN LIFE AND DO NOT INVOLVE YOU ABUSER IN YOUR PLANS OR DECISION MAKING.

Go and see the movie, "SLEEPING WITH THE ENEMY"

IT HIT HOME FOR ME....

DO NOT LEAVE YOUR WEDDING RING IN THE TOILET FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE....TAKE IT WITH YOU AND WEAR IT UNTIL YOU HAVE HEALED ENOUGH TO LOVE YOURSELF AND INSIST ON BEING TREATED BETTER BY THE NEXT MAN IN YOUR LIFE...YOU DESERVE REAL LOVE....FIND IT INSIDE OF YOURSELF AND SHARE IT WHEN YOU ARE READY.

LEARN TO FORGIVE AND NOT HATE....HATE WILL CONSUME YOUR ENERGY SPIRIT, AND SOUL, NOT HIS....IT IS SELF ABUSIVE COUNTERPRODUCTIVE TO HEALING. DON'T WAIT UNTIL A CRIME HAS BEEN COMMITTED AND YOU ARE IN THE COURT SYSTEM WHICH WILL NOT ALWAYS WORK FOR YOU WHEN YOUR ABUSER IS HIGHLY INTELLIGENT AND MANIPULATIVE LIKE MINE IS.

HIS MISTAKE WAS HE MARRIED A HIGHLY INTELLIGENT WIFE , ...who is just a little too long suffering, stubborn, confused and unwilling to let go until it really really hurt...

Thank God I had a sister who convinced me life without him would be a lot better and that there were other men who would be good to me just like her ND husband was good to her beyond what she believed was possible. I longed for a love like that.....


DO YOURSELF A FAVOR AND CUT THE UMBILICAL CORD AND START LIVING AWAY FROM THE SICK ABUSER AND GET THERAPY TO HEAL FROM THE ABUSE OR IT COULD HAUNT YOUR FOR YEARS LIKE IT IS DOING ME.

GOD FINALLY HELPED ME RID MYSELF OF MY OWN DEMONS AND HE STEERED ME IN THE DIRECTION OF A REAL ANGEL, BUT IT WAS AT A VERY HIGH COST WHEN I HELD ONTO THE ABUSIVE ONE SO TIGHT.

LEARN THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING, IT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE.

LEARN QUICKLY TO LET GO of OF THE ABUSER and HATE THE FLOWERS FOR WHAT THEY REPRESENT.


Carla
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