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  #26  
Old 06-26-2015, 01:53 AM
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It's official; ... we all said the same thing. So in a nut shell OP - time to face reality, turn yourself in, do your time and get your had on straight ... also while you are doing time your credit will fix itself. IF possible while you are locked up learn a trade. Upon your release you will have plenty time to establish yourself.
You did this got yourself into this mess, and you are the only person who can get yourself out of this mess. And if ya need some kind of will power - All those people who are talking crap about you - Prove them wrong.
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  #27  
Old 06-26-2015, 11:48 AM
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Oh, you're bipolar - another reason to drink. Keep using it as an excuse.

Dude - you have a DUI 4 - what do you think the chances are that you're going to stay out of police radar if you move 2000 miles away?

And, yes, they do come get you. DUI 4 isn't a minor felony. Your estimates are waaaayyyy wrong. Especially with a crime that has a lot of political attention.

Want to run and drink until you somehow find enough money to stick a gun in your mouth? really? Because of finances? Really? How stupid is your alcoholism making you?
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  #28  
Old 06-26-2015, 08:26 PM
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Ok. I just have to step in here. Most alcoholics are in denial and become defensive when then are being accused of being alcoholics. He is admitting to being an alcoholic (see Subject Line), and that is always the First and most important step to recovery. He is drinking now because he feels that it is helping him to deal with the stress. The first step is done: Admit you have a problem. Step 2 is to seek help with a counselor as you can not deal with this on your own. I am sure, there are places that will help at no cost. Running away is only a temporary solution and may sound good for now, but in the long run, it will not do any good. He has done great admitting a problem that a lot of people won't admit to. They live in denial. Addiction is not a choice, it is a serious problem. I hope he will get an attorney to see if he can get help rather than prison time. Prisons don't help with addiction, and if he is depressed on top of that, it will be devastating. I never agree that people should be incarcerated for addiction problems. The DUIs did not cause any injuries, so get him help, and not prison time. My two cents.
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  #29  
Old 06-27-2015, 12:49 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mtbfan View Post
Ok. I just have to step in here. Most alcoholics are in denial and become defensive when then are being accused of being alcoholics. He is admitting to being an alcoholic (see Subject Line), and that is always the First and most important step to recovery. He is drinking now because he feels that it is helping him to deal with the stress. The first step is done: Admit you have a problem. Step 2 is to seek help with a counselor as you can not deal with this on your own. I am sure, there are places that will help at no cost. Running away is only a temporary solution and may sound good for now, but in the long run, it will not do any good. He has done great admitting a problem that a lot of people won't admit to. They live in denial. Addiction is not a choice, it is a serious problem. I hope he will get an attorney to see if he can get help rather than prison time. Prisons don't help with addiction, and if he is depressed on top of that, it will be devastating. I never agree that people should be incarcerated for addiction problems. The DUIs did not cause any injuries, so get him help, and not prison time. My two cents.
Yeah all that sounds real good but thats not what the orignal post was about.
Addiction is a choice as far as Im concerned when it comes to alcoholism because it's your choice to continue to feed the beast that tears your world apart. Believe me my first drink was given to me before I could walk.
And everyone here understands the problem of addicts and mentally ill being incarcerated but I dont believe its correct to tell this fella its not his fault but his addiction that has him in trouble. I don't care how messed up you are or how depressed it makes a person you still have to take responsibility for your actions. Why do you think the whole board is on his ass to get an attorney and turn himself in? Maybe not being on the run will help him get the rehabilitation he needs before that 5th DUI becomes vehicular homicide while he'sfeeling sorry for himself for the first 4. That's pure luck no one was hurt actually.
And yep admitting you are an alcoholic is the first step but it is usuallyfollowed by entering AA, rehab, something- anything but not coming to PTO and asking people who have successfully ran to please give him guidance on it. That's not what this ssiteis about. I don't believe the administrators, moderators, nor the members condone or would give anyone that kind of help.
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  #30  
Old 06-27-2015, 05:02 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mtbfan View Post
Ok. I just have to step in here. Most alcoholics are in denial and become defensive when then are being accused of being alcoholics. He is admitting to being an alcoholic (see Subject Line), and that is always the First and most important step to recovery. He is drinking now because he feels that it is helping him to deal with the stress. The first step is done: Admit you have a problem. Step 2 is to seek help with a counselor as you can not deal with this on your own. I am sure, there are places that will help at no cost. Running away is only a temporary solution and may sound good for now, but in the long run, it will not do any good. He has done great admitting a problem that a lot of people won't admit to. They live in denial. Addiction is not a choice, it is a serious problem. I hope he will get an attorney to see if he can get help rather than prison time. Prisons don't help with addiction, and if he is depressed on top of that, it will be devastating. I never agree that people should be incarcerated for addiction problems. The DUIs did not cause any injuries, so get him help, and not prison time. My two cents.
Thank you for responding. You said exactly what I was trying to say.
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  #31  
Old 06-27-2015, 11:34 AM
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Addiction is a disease.

Not dealing with it is a choice.

Getting into a car and driving while drunk is a choice. Doing it 4 times when you know you're going to be serving a few years in prison is a choice.

Society needs to be protected from somebody who insists on making such poor choices.

As for running away from the charges - who hasn't thought about it? Very few people do it for a huge number of reasons, including having the clarity of mind to realize that it just makes a bad situation worse.

As for suicide - how common is it for somebody facing their first real term of prison to think about suicide? Very few people do it because they have the clarity of mind to break down the problem of prison and realize that life isn't over just because you do some time. Hell, even LWOP and death penalty felons realize that life isn't over because you're in prison. Those are the people who hit the true realization of how important and precious life really is, even limited to prison.

This yahoo doesn't have the clarity of mind necessary to deal with his situation. Further, he's listening to his addiction as if the thoughts produced by his addiction are his own thoughts and are absolutely true. He's making up statistics about whether or not AZ will go after him if he's busted 2000 miles away for the sole purpose of bolstering the opinion of his addiction so he can stay in the addiction. He's not willing to challenge these assumptions, and instead is making up statistics as if they're true!

We're not going to be able to do anything for this yahoo. He's too far into his addiction and will not allow that sort of challenge. (Yet another reason society needs to be protected from the OP as his thinking is allowing him to pursue some very bad behavior).

Dude needs inpatient rehab. With bipolar, he needs a dual diagnosis track so he can also address his bipolar (he's not dealing with his bipolar - if he was, he wouldn't be drinking as the meds that help a person with bipolar are not to be taken with alcohol). But, he hasn't hit bottom. He's not going to bother. The only thing that could possibly save him at this point is outside intervention locking his ass up. Even if he never obtains clarity of thought and his addiction is still asserting itself, society will be safe from him. The only thing worse than an alcoholic who's so self important that he repeatedly gets behind the wheel after drinking is that same alcoholic with a gun.

OP, really? this sh!t makes actual sense to you? How self centered are you?
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  #32  
Old 06-27-2015, 09:55 PM
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Addiction is never a choice and unless someone has been addicted to anything, they really can't speak here. I don't think anyone wants to be addicted, but society looks at addiction as a weakness, when it really is a mental problem and can't be dealt with alone. All these accusations and blaming will not help one bit. I agree, he has to seek help and can't continue to hide behind his excuses, but noone seems to want to help, and the vicious cycle continues. Should he run…NO! Absolutely not!! Should he seek help! YES! Does it cost to seek help? YES! He is here and being judged so it does not look promising. Addiction is something nobody will understand unless you walked in their shoes. This is Prison Talk, and nobody understands more about what happened to us and our loved ones than those who walked in our shoes. Why is addiction any different? Do you really believe those who have never been involved in the criminal "justice" system would understand or even try to understand? The same goes for addiction. He is not a bad person, he just has a problem and no idea how to deal with it, and he IS reaching out for help in a round about way. None of us on this board are considered saints because we are involved in "crime" and "bad" things. How would you like it to be judged? Think about it!
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  #33  
Old 06-27-2015, 10:09 PM
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"yourself" didn't say that addiction was a choice. Most of us who have deal with addiction know that it is a disease. What she said was that dealing with the addiction is a choice.

Nobody here is judging this person. Almost everybody here has advised him NOT to run and to get the help he needs.

If we want to discuss the ins and outs of addictions, all of that is for another thread. The OP asked in his original thread for advice on how to run and be successful at it. That is the ONLY topic that we need to be discussing here. Anything else is topic for another thread.
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  #34  
Old 06-27-2015, 10:09 PM
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Quote:
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Addiction is never a choice and unless someone has been addicted to anything, they really can't speak here.
I don't see anyone claiming addiction itself is a choice...but the failure to seek out competent help and to continue acting in a manner that places others at risk IS a choice.

Quote:
He is here and being judged so it does not look promising.
He is being judged for his refusal/unwillingness to step up and deal with the consequences for his decisions. That is VERY different from judging him for claiming an addiction...
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Old 06-27-2015, 10:30 PM
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I said addiction is a disease - did you miss that first part of my post?

Sometimes it helps to look at it from the standpoint of a socially acceptable disease, like diabetes. Diabetes is a disease. The refusal to treat it is a choice. Similarly, ignoring the dietary component to diabetes is a choice. So, a person with type I diabetes who doesn't check his blood sugar and then eats half a dozen candy bars and goes into a diabetic coma - is that because of the diabetes? or because the person chose not to deal with his diabetes?

This guy is similar to a diabetic who's not monitoring sugar levels, refuses to eat right, won't exercise, and then wonders why they want to amputate his foot. Instead of dealing with a gangrenous foot and diabetic blindness, he's wanting to run away across country so he can continue to eat candy bars and ignore his diabetes.

Get the difference between choice and disease? He's not getting it. Then again, he hasn't been back - he's either in jail again, dead, or he's run. No way he's decided to man up and get into rehab.
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  #36  
Old 06-27-2015, 10:50 PM
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MTBFAN,

I want to thank you again for your replys. When I started receiving responses back about my concern that the post would turn bad (hostile) I was quite surprised that people thought I was "condoning " his actions and that "enabling" needs to stop. What??? I never said what he did was okay. I could see through the defensive combative words and the desperation that he feels, enough that he posted on a public forum for advice on how to run... lol. I know that yes he wants to hear it's possible but I believe he was looking for someone to understand and help him deal with the situation, reassurance that while he is in a self imposed bad situation, there is hope.

Instead from the get go it was man up, grow some, face the consequences. He just did what nearly every other addict would do... He threw a tantrum and acted out. I
What addict do you know hasn't done this?

I was especially offended with the "enabling " comment. I invite you to please search and read my replys to parents of addicts. I guess I have a little more empathy to the OP then most, I am currently watching a sibling self destruct, 6 DUI's, loss of a great career, so much guilt inside that he just can't cope, and the enabling from mom...I know what the outcome is going to be and it absolutely kills me.

I know that this is going to ruffle some feathers as well but I started to think how different the responses would be if he was someone incarcerated crying about how unfair his sentence was and yadda yadda. I know it would have been a lot more supportive then this. You bash this man and want him to pay his dues but see past others crimes enough to be able to ask "was the victim innocent"???

I am here to for support and to give support, I think somewhere this got overlooked in regards to the OP. Support + Understanding = Condoning? Not in my book
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  #37  
Old 06-27-2015, 10:57 PM
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I said addiction is a disease - did you miss that first part of my post?

Sometimes it helps to look at it from the standpoint of a socially acceptable disease, like diabetes. Diabetes is a disease. The refusal to treat it is a choice. Similarly, ignoring the dietary component to diabetes is a choice. So, a person with type I diabetes who doesn't check his blood sugar and then eats half a dozen candy bars and goes into a diabetic coma - is that because of the diabetes? or because the person chose not to deal with his diabetes?

This guy is similar to a diabetic who's not monitoring sugar levels, refuses to eat right, won't exercise, and then wonders why they want to amputate his foot. Instead of dealing with a gangrenous foot and diabetic blindness, he's wanting to run away across country so he can continue to eat candy bars and ignore his diabetes.

Get the difference between choice and disease? He's not getting it. Then again, he hasn't been back - he's either in jail again, dead, or he's run. No way he's decided to man up and get into rehab.
I have to point out one huge difference in the diabeye/alcoholic comparison. Diabetes does not impair your judgement and it does not lower your inhibitions.
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  #38  
Old 06-27-2015, 11:11 PM
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And, I'm going to add that the rest of this discussion is Off Topic. If we want to talk about alcoholism and the disease and all the other stuff, it's time to start another thread.

This thread was about the OP asking about how to successfully run. I think we've covered that AND some. Any more Off Topic posts will be removed.
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