Welcome to the Prison Talk Online Community! Take a Minute and Sign Up Today!






Go Back   Prison Talk > FOR FAMILY & FRIENDS > When the Relationship is Over...
Register Entertainment FAQ Calendar Mark Forums Read

Notices

When the Relationship is Over... This forum is about discussing your thoughts, feelings and issues now that you and your incarcerated (or formerly incarcerated) loved one are no longer together. (This forum is NOT for bashing - please read the rules before posting.)

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 07-19-2012, 07:33 PM
leekafreak leekafreak is offline
Banned
 

Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: no
Posts: 71
Thanks: 1
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default He got out, used me, went back in and now he's writing me again

So my now ex and I met years ago and decided to start a mwi relationship. I waited for him and he got out and stabbed me in the back by hanging out with people that didn't like me. Things went downhill super fast and we broke up 4 months after he got out. I supported him through everything, inside and out. He contacted me last month apologizing about how things ended and wanted closure. I told him I wasn't wasting my time writing him and if he has something to say he could call me. He wrote me a 3page letter about how he misses me and misses my genitals and all this crap that seems typical of a bored convict. I'm not in love with him anymore but I'm not over him. I really don't know what to do. I cant talk to anyone of my friends cuz they think the whole situation is pathetic, which it is. I'm so lost and confused.

Last edited by leekafreak; 07-19-2012 at 07:35 PM..
Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
  #2  
Old 07-19-2012, 07:51 PM
juss me6 juss me6 is offline
Registered User
Donation Award 
 

Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: ny, usa
Posts: 1,941
Thanks: 165
Thanked 637 Times in 425 Posts
Default

Well if you think you were better off without him then ignore him. And let me tell you something. You can't tell a grown ass man who he can be friends with. He's not a child. Just because you don't like them oh well. Time to put on your big girl panties.
__________________


Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to juss me6 For This Useful Post:
aprilp (07-29-2012)
  #3  
Old 07-19-2012, 07:53 PM
LoveYourself1st LoveYourself1st is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Michigan, USA
Posts: 622
Thanks: 517
Thanked 1,069 Times in 354 Posts
Default

You already know he is a user. Ignore him and he will go away.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to LoveYourself1st For This Useful Post:
MsPrettiJackson (07-21-2012)
  #4  
Old 07-19-2012, 08:16 PM
leekafreak leekafreak is offline
Banned
 

Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: no
Posts: 71
Thanks: 1
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by juss me6
Well if you think you were better off without him then ignore him. And let me tell you something. You can't tell a grown ass man who he can be friends with. He's not a child. Just because you don't like them oh well. Time to put on your big girl panties.
Its not me not liking them, they don't like me and started problems with us indirectly. I never said anything to him about it.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 07-19-2012, 08:19 PM
juss me6 juss me6 is offline
Registered User
Donation Award 
 

Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: ny, usa
Posts: 1,941
Thanks: 165
Thanked 637 Times in 425 Posts
Default

Smh. Well then they were losers with alternate motives. Look where he ended up. Probably because of them. Count your blessings and move on. You said he used you. There you go. Why would you want to talk to someone you personally feel used you?
__________________


Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 07-19-2012, 08:25 PM
herewithoutyou2's Avatar
herewithoutyou2 herewithoutyou2 is offline
So hopelessly in love <3
 

Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Illinois
Posts: 2,178
Thanks: 127
Thanked 502 Times in 382 Posts
Default

I say ignore him. He sounds just like my ex. I was with this guy who was locked up off and on for 2 years. He got out early but never told me he was getting out. He didn't contact me for a week! We hung out a few times n he got his pleasure (none for me) and then he disappeared. Then I saw he was in jail again so I wrote him thinking he might need a friend. Same old jail talk. I miss you, I love you, will you marry me, put $ on my books. I told him to get lost, that I found a good man.
__________________
This life would kill me if I didn't have you
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 07-19-2012, 08:37 PM
InmateLover67's Avatar
InmateLover67 InmateLover67 is offline
Does NOT Sugarcoat
 

Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Oregon
Posts: 4,075
Thanks: 872
Thanked 3,622 Times in 1,884 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by iamhuman View Post
So my now ex and I met years ago and decided to start a mwi relationship. I waited for him and he got out and stabbed me in the back by hanging out with people that didn't like me. Things went downhill super fast and we broke up 4 months after he got out. I supported him through everything, inside and out. He contacted me last month apologizing about how things ended and wanted closure. I told him I wasn't wasting my time writing him and if he has something to say he could call me. He wrote me a 3page letter about how he misses me and misses my genitals and all this crap that seems typical of a bored convict. I'm not in love with him anymore but I'm not over him. I really don't know what to do. I cant talk to anyone of my friends cuz they think the whole situation is pathetic, which it is. I'm so lost and confused.
I suggest you keep moving on and not get yourself wrapped up with him again. You aleady know he is using jail-yalk, so why buy into it? You deserve better than this.

I would tell him if he really meant those things he would do his time, get out and prove that what he is saying is true and genuine.

You will not get over him if you continue to converse with him, because he will say all the right things and you will sucker into it...be smart about this. You said you are not in love with him, so are you thinking of getting back together with him in hopes you will fall in love with him again?

Whatever you decide, I wish you the best!

Peace~
__________________




Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to InmateLover67 For This Useful Post:
BirdAndAlexis (07-21-2012)
  #8  
Old 07-19-2012, 09:06 PM
La Divina's Avatar
La Divina La Divina is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: new jersey
Posts: 406
Thanks: 221
Thanked 167 Times in 116 Posts
Default

If u get played again which u will if u go back with him then dont blame him u know the saying first time foolish him 2nd time foolish me!!! just saying
__________________
And i will never be the same foolish girl that fell for ur words and i will rise from this like never before!
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to La Divina For This Useful Post:
aprilp (07-29-2012)
  #9  
Old 07-19-2012, 09:10 PM
MRS.GRIFFIN's Avatar
MRS.GRIFFIN MRS.GRIFFIN is offline
TINYWIFEY
 

Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: HOUSTON,TEXAS
Posts: 1,454
Thanks: 241
Thanked 472 Times in 424 Posts
Default

Use? Girl let's start by looking at this,,, things went downhill very fast....you are better than that.
1. PRAY FOR HIM
2. FORGIVE HIM
3. DON'T RESPOND TO HIM
4. FORGET HIM
AS FOR YOU.......M-O-V-E ON
__________________
I TINY

Last edited by MRS.GRIFFIN; 07-19-2012 at 09:14 PM..
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to MRS.GRIFFIN For This Useful Post:
Forever&aDay (07-20-2012)
  #10  
Old 07-19-2012, 09:31 PM
blah8705 blah8705 is online now
Moderator

PTOQ Editorial Team Member Staff Superstar Winner PTO Moderator 

Donation Award 
 

Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Illinois, USA
Posts: 1,880
Thanks: 1,054
Thanked 1,621 Times in 848 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by iamhuman View Post
So my now ex and I met years ago and decided to start a mwi relationship. I waited for him and he got out and stabbed me in the back by hanging out with people that didn't like me. Things went downhill super fast and we broke up 4 months after he got out. I supported him through everything, inside and out. He contacted me last month apologizing about how things ended and wanted closure. I told him I wasn't wasting my time writing him and if he has something to say he could call me. He wrote me a 3page letter about how he misses me and misses my genitals and all this crap that seems typical of a bored convict. I'm not in love with him anymore but I'm not over him. I really don't know what to do. I cant talk to anyone of my friends cuz they think the whole situation is pathetic, which it is. I'm so lost and confused.

What a sweet-talker he is!! Am I the only one who noticed that part? I'm sorry, but that part made me laugh a bit. Anywho, move on from him, he's just a user. At least you know that already. It's going to be hard, I know, but you can do it!! Go out and spoil yourself, and when you're ready, find yourself a real man who will treat you right!
__________________




Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to blah8705 For This Useful Post:
lil peep (07-20-2012), Miss_A (07-19-2012)
  #11  
Old 07-19-2012, 09:56 PM
Miss_A's Avatar
Miss_A Miss_A is offline
Banned
Donation Award 
 

Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: IL
Posts: 5,278
Thanks: 2,725
Thanked 3,838 Times in 1,992 Posts
Default

He misses your genitals?!! Yeah, I'm with blah. What a sweet talk he is!!

Girl, leave that man where he is. Do not let him call you. Why would you tell him that if he has anything to say to you, he can call you?! He said plenty when he left you after he was released. All he's going to do is tell you what you want to hear so that you'll take him back and begin to support him. It's very apparent that the man only wants you when he's locked up. Why do you want to be with someone like that?

Last edited by Miss_A; 07-19-2012 at 09:57 PM..
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 07-19-2012, 10:13 PM
joetnymedic's Avatar
joetnymedic joetnymedic is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: northeast u.s.
Posts: 1,380
Thanks: 178
Thanked 1,385 Times in 609 Posts
Default

can I say something from an ex-inmates as well as a male point of view. actually leave the male out, just from an ex inmates point. I don't want to be brutal but I am going to be honest. many inmates "game" peole. To be honest that's what I see going on here. If he really cared about you, he would not have listened to those peole who "didn't like you" fact is, If I was lucky and had someone support me while I was in and then got out.... I'd be with them and be there for them as they were for me. Fact, he is now locked up and has nothing again. He knows you cared and may still care so you are going to be his bank while he's in there and he is going to make you think you mean the world to him while he's in there so you continue to support him. My marriage was screwed up when I went in and it crashed while in, but my ex stood by me until after my home confinement finished and then she left. She was completely honest with me that she didn't love me anymore and we still talk and on occassion are there for each other thru the hard times. not in a sexual way either. In fact, not to be an ass and I damned sure am not blowing my own horn, in fact i'm pretty ashamed of it but I haven't had sex since before I went in and that was 2006. Haven't had sex since getting out in 2008. I could have, but I don't use people and I wont be used anymore myself either. I want a relationship where I am with someone who cares as much about me as I do them and is someone I can grow old with and share my days and nights with. Some of my friends bust my chops because not in a sexual way but it's like I am a woman in a mans body in a sense. Most women want what I want as most men just care about getting a piece of tail and staying happy that way. That's not me. I want a relationship and I want stability. So when I read stuff like what you posted, I can see what's going on having been there. I think you deserve more and I think he's an ass for trying to use you yet again. Take care of yourself and find someone who really loves you and build a life for yourself.

Good luck

Joe
Reply With Quote
The Following 12 Users Say Thank You to joetnymedic For This Useful Post:
blah8705 (07-19-2012), Eternal Sunshine (07-19-2012), Forever&aDay (07-20-2012), hisbabygurl2014 (07-19-2012), Idreamofhim (09-01-2013), kevinmom (07-21-2012), Klewis (07-19-2012), lil peep (07-20-2012), mallafri (07-20-2012), MsPrettiJackson (07-21-2012), Tuesday123 (07-20-2012)
  #13  
Old 07-19-2012, 10:17 PM
hisbabygurl2014 hisbabygurl2014 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: somewhere he is not!
Posts: 675
Thanks: 639
Thanked 348 Times in 195 Posts
Default

Wow that part about missing your gentials is corny as hell. These men ( I use that word losely) do not know how to sweet talk. It gets on my damn nerves.,like,who,taught,you to talk like that.,and then I laughed because most guys who like to use girls say corny shit anyways.

Ok so back to the point. I always say if guy only thinks about,you while he is locked up isnt a guy I would mess up, because he had all the chance to be with you in the outside but felt you were not worthy of him in the outside but you are in the imside. I understand you have feelings for this dude still. But that feeling will fade away and you will also fade away.from his memories too once you stop writing him or dont write him at all. But damn girl check this out: YOU ARE BETTER THEN THIS. BUT BE A JAIL TALKER,GF BECAUSE YOU ALREADY KNOW THE GAME HE PLAYS. find yourself a good man,that will,treat you right.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to hisbabygurl2014 For This Useful Post:
MsPrettiJackson (07-21-2012)
  #14  
Old 07-19-2012, 10:20 PM
RubyRed77 RubyRed77 is offline
Go Niners!
 

Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: San Francisco, California
Posts: 350
Thanks: 53
Thanked 124 Times in 99 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by LoveYourself1st
You already know he is a user. Ignore him and he will go away.
LOL @ "ignore him and he will go away"

I needed that laugh!

Yes, definitely a user, not worth your time girl.
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 07-19-2012, 10:26 PM
Eternal Sunshine's Avatar
Eternal Sunshine Eternal Sunshine is offline
Living and Learning
 

Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 2,095
Thanks: 2,195
Thanked 1,735 Times in 1,022 Posts
Default

You have already gone down this path with him, so why do it again? Nothing has changed except he is back in prison again and looking to play the game on you again. Let that one go and keep moving on down the road of life. Why bother?

I have an ex who got out and left me two weeks after coming home. Good riddance to him. You know what? He went back to prison two months ago. He is back where he belongs. If he was to contact me, he wouldn't get anything, but ignored. I know what he's about and I don't have time for his games in my life.
__________________


Don’t make someone a priority in your life when you’re only an option in theirs.
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Old 07-19-2012, 10:32 PM
msgreenthumb67's Avatar
msgreenthumb67 msgreenthumb67 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: PO Box 7372 Tempe, AZ 85281 USA
Posts: 580
Thanks: 41
Thanked 200 Times in 126 Posts
Default

You know what....some Inmates/ex-cons feel just like Joetnymedic!! My man is that way. He just wants to settle down with me and have a solid, lifelong relationship. No more time to waste/throw away!!! We are so perfect for each other it's an obvious God setup!!!! Let go of the losers....there are REAL men out there (or currently incarcerated) who CAN and WILL love you for you when they see that you are 1 in a million and able to see and love them for who they ARE now vs who/what they once were!

1 Corinthians 1:25-29
__________________


Reply With Quote
  #17  
Old 07-19-2012, 11:21 PM
Klewis's Avatar
Klewis Klewis is offline
Registered User
Donation Award 
 

Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Texas, USA
Posts: 3,731
Thanks: 2,893
Thanked 4,052 Times in 1,721 Posts
Default

If you should waste your time and start writing him again you will be telling him that you are willing to play his sick game, so therefore you can not get mad when it hurts you again.
__________________





To the world you might just be one person, but to one person you just might be the world.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Klewis For This Useful Post:
#1AndOnly (07-20-2012)
  #18  
Old 07-20-2012, 12:10 AM
Patty's Avatar
Patty Patty is offline
WINNING! Admin

PTOQ Editorial Team Member 

Donation Award 
 

Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Rockford, Illinois
Posts: 38,223
Thanks: 16,081
Thanked 37,591 Times in 10,449 Posts
Default

People will treat you any old way if you allow it. What he is asking you now is will you allow him to treat you like shit in the free world after you support him through another bid. If you decide to do so then the answer is yes, he will have you in the palm of his hands and discard you when he no longer needs you.
__________________
For those who can, contributions to keep PTO up and running are most welcome HERE

THIS CORRESPONDENCE
IS FROM A WOMAN IN LOVE
WITH A FORMER INMATE OF
THE ILLINOIS DEPARTMENT
OF CORRECTIONS





Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Patty For This Useful Post:
BFFsupporter (07-20-2012), D4C (07-20-2012), sidewalker (07-20-2012)
  #19  
Old 07-20-2012, 12:35 AM
JKB's Girl's Avatar
JKB's Girl JKB's Girl is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: South Midwest
Posts: 3,620
Thanks: 1,540
Thanked 3,895 Times in 1,172 Posts
Default

You know what he wants, you know what he's about, so why even open his letters? You have the option of returning them unopened, do it.

OMG, unless you crave any kind of attention so bad that you are willing to put up with his bullshit. Then whatever happens is on you. Sorry, but this is in your hands.
__________________
Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to JKB's Girl For This Useful Post:
D4C (07-20-2012), lil peep (07-20-2012), nicenjazzy (07-20-2012), Patty (07-20-2012)
  #20  
Old 07-20-2012, 01:25 AM
Tuesday123 Tuesday123 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Laconia New Hampshire
Posts: 1,889
Thanks: 1,738
Thanked 1,897 Times in 891 Posts
Default

"the boys" will always come in between you and your man if he lets them.

So its not really about them, its about your man letting it be about them.










Quote:
Originally Posted by iamhuman View Post
Its not me not liking them, they don't like me and started problems with us indirectly. I never said anything to him about it.
__________________




Reply With Quote
  #21  
Old 07-20-2012, 01:45 AM
mrs.cervantes19's Avatar
mrs.cervantes19 mrs.cervantes19 is offline
Anything Is Possible &lt;3
 

Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Long Beach, California. US
Posts: 272
Thanks: 6
Thanked 24 Times in 20 Posts
Default

It's not pathetic, things happen ! You got to learn from your mistakes, honestly I wouldnt be there for him . By the way it's all about respect you don't have to let him know not to hang out with certain people I'm pretty sure he wouldn't like you hanging out with certain people he didn't like or people who didn't like him. It's all about RESPECT!
__________________
Hoy tengo ganas de ti y como no te tengo...Te pienso, te imagino y te sueño!(:

Last edited by mrs.cervantes19; 07-20-2012 at 01:47 AM..
Reply With Quote
  #22  
Old 07-20-2012, 02:54 PM
pisces317's Avatar
pisces317 pisces317 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: BKLYN NY
Posts: 2,362
Thanks: 4,487
Thanked 1,769 Times in 1,128 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by iamhuman View Post
So my now ex and I met years ago and decided to start a mwi relationship. I waited for him and he got out and stabbed me in the back by hanging out with people that didn't like me. Things went downhill super fast and we broke up 4 months after he got out. I supported him through everything, inside and out. He contacted me last month apologizing about how things ended and wanted closure. I told him I wasn't wasting my time writing him and if he has something to say he could call me. He wrote me a 3page letter about how he misses me and misses my genitals and all this crap that seems typical of a bored convict. I'm not in love with him anymore but I'm not over him. I really don't know what to do. I cant talk to anyone of my friends cuz they think the whole situation is pathetic, which it is. I'm so lost and confused.
this guy is crazy if he thinks that writing and pleading can help,first off sorry for you even being with this person you deserve more then a good sob story,he had his chance and was'nt very grateful and look what happen KARMA bit his butt and now he expects you to understand his story again and this time you do best by moving forward,i wish you lots of luck cause this one not going away fast and you may still see a future for you guys
__________________
:\i'm still here pto
Reply With Quote
  #23  
Old 07-20-2012, 06:59 PM
leekafreak leekafreak is offline
Banned
 

Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: no
Posts: 71
Thanks: 1
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default

Thanks everyone
Reply With Quote
  #24  
Old 07-20-2012, 08:28 PM
skellerton skellerton is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: MA
Posts: 678
Thanks: 553
Thanked 1,146 Times in 468 Posts
Default

You got a sh*t sandwich..... no need for seconds.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to skellerton For This Useful Post:
MsPrettiJackson (07-21-2012)
  #25  
Old 07-20-2012, 09:35 PM
Forever&aDay's Avatar
Forever&aDay Forever&aDay is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: CA/United States
Posts: 407
Thanks: 169
Thanked 299 Times in 161 Posts
Default

Here's a quote for you---"When someone shows you who they are, believe them!"
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 04:24 PM.
Copyright © 2001- 2013 Prison Talk Online
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Website Design & Custom vBulletin Skins by: Relivo Media
Message Board Statistics