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Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison For everyone who has a husband, boyfriend or male partner incarcerated.

View Poll Results: Would you stay with a cheating spouse?
Yes. I love him! 9 5.33%
Maybe we can work it out?? 55 32.54%
Nope! Absolutely not! 105 62.13%
Voters: 169. You may not vote on this poll

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  #76  
Old 05-09-2012, 08:40 AM
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Originally Posted by D's lady View Post
I've been with my guy for 8 years this month. We have two kids. I don't even have his name tattooed on me. I've thought about getting my kids names on me. But Facebook can be a bad place. I've had to block several men because of the extremely dirty things they would say to me. A lot of people are insecure. I can understand the concern. My man knows I go to lunch and movies with female friends....but will not go to clubs. I screwed up once because of Facebook and that's my fault; it was my vulnerability and low self esteem at the time. I let a so called male friend smooth talk me. It only went as far as a kiss...but it was enough to make me realize how stupid I was being. I love my man and I will never stray again. I don't understand why men can't just stay friends in Facebook...it seems like 90% start hitting on ya as soon as they find out that your man is locked up. Does this happen to u all? And how do u handle it...do u block the guy...do u tell your man about every guy that flirts?

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How about if you don't go to the bar, you may not be tempted to drink? I'm just saying...

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  #77  
Old 05-09-2012, 08:47 AM
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[quote=LoveMyMeche;6749837]In the words of Sweet Brown " I ain't got time for THAT"... If he chooses to cheat after all this time and ALL THIS.. I'm OUT and I ain't being fake, acting tough, or anything of the like.. THAT is my RELATIONSHIP killer. I would ACTUALLY leave and chunk him the dueces while doing so![/QUote





I am 100% with you how you going cheat on somebody who basically put there life on hold and basically wait for you and thry cheat on you ! They shows everything that they ferl bout you chunking up thrm deuces!!! Save yourself time and life!
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  #78  
Old 05-09-2012, 08:57 AM
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Originally Posted by Scotties_Girl21 View Post
I went through this when he was home once. I got the proof, confronted him then told him to get his shit and get out of my house. There was no sex in this cheating but he was chilling with the girl, his ex and didn't tell me . When I kicked him out he realized what he'd done and a few days after we worked things out. He knows I don't play that shit and if he ever does it again I'm done. No if's, ands, or buts about it.
Same things with me. I didn't trip til I saw the proof. When I did all hell broke loose & I let him go. He never had sex with anyone, if he did that would definitely be unforgivable! It was just ONE letter.. it hurt like hell but I made it perfectly clear that I would NOT go through it again.
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  #79  
Old 05-09-2012, 09:19 AM
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Well if this is the case then why isn't the pain only felt by the man. Why does his woman feel the pain also?

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Originally Posted by COMPLETElyhis View Post
When men cheat, it has nothing to do with their woman, it has everything to do with them.

Peace and blessings...
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  #80  
Old 05-09-2012, 09:47 AM
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Originally Posted by mariazaravinos
LADIES HELP!!! I'm having a problem with my pen pal who is now my boyfriend. He's paranoid that I'm talking to other men on facebook just because I told him a guy messaged me. He's saying thinks like " I just want u to be happy" & " Don't delete Facebook because then you can't message other men" I've given him my life. I don't know what else to do to show him I love him. I'm getting his name tattooed on me tomorrow. Is he just being jealous and hoping to get a reaction out of me or is he actually angry at me? Is our relationship ruined because of his fears that I will do him wrong like his ex did
are you SURE you two are at the level where you should tattoo his name on you? That is so permanent and honestly you met him as a pen pal... Those fears he's throwing at you could be game. Unfortunately you don't "know him know him" that is extreme to prove your live to someone who hasn't proved their love to you yet OUT HERE!
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  #81  
Old 05-09-2012, 09:49 AM
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Originally Posted by COMPLETElyhis

When men cheat, it has nothing to do with their woman, it has everything to do with them.

Peace and blessings...
You say that like its in the bible. What you just said is NOT fact, it's opinion. Men cheat for all sorts of reasons and so do women.
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  #82  
Old 05-09-2012, 09:52 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by COMPLETElyhis

I disagree for the following: If my husband cheats, that's on HIM! It is no reflection whatsoever of me. I am doing my job. If he's not doing his, then once again, THAT'S ON HIM. For a man to cheat, it doesn't mean that you were having any problems. It doesn't mean that you didn't do your job as his woman, it simply means that HE CHEATED. The end.

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It CAN mean you were having problems and it also can happen when you are having problems that "you" are not aware of. Or he could be a selfish jerk. Someone cheating on you isn't your fault, but IMO it also means the relationship you thought was so great "ain't so great" cause your man isn't LOYAL to you.
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  #83  
Old 05-09-2012, 09:54 AM
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Originally Posted by COMPLETElyhis

You're relationship doesn't have to be bad or in jeopardy just for him to cheat. Men cheat because they "can" and women cheat for some sort of emotional fulfillment.

Peace and blessings...
That is soooo not true! I know women who date and screw like a typical man! In fact I know a few who dump men when they become emotionally attached to them. Your making some BOLD generalizations!
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  #84  
Old 05-09-2012, 09:56 AM
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I would drop him on his arse so quick he wouldn't know what hit him. I have done the bids, I have dealt with the addictions and all of the heartbreak that comes with this whole "locked up man" scenario. One thing I will not deal with is him being unfaithful. I was married to a man one time who couldn't keep his zipper up and will not do it again. If my husband has so little respect for me that he would cheat on me then I do not want or need him in my life. I love him, he is my soul mate and very important to me, but he knows I would never in a million years tolerate this kind of disrespect again in my life. It would hurt and I would still love him, but I would never be able to live with him again.
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  #85  
Old 05-09-2012, 09:57 AM
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Originally Posted by LoveMyMeche View Post
You say that like its in the bible. What you just said is NOT fact, it's opinion. Men cheat for all sorts of reasons and so do women.
I never said what I say is FACT. But it is a reason. And what does the bible have to do with anything?

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  #86  
Old 05-09-2012, 10:00 AM
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Originally Posted by COMPLETElyhis

I never said what I say is FACT. But it is a reason. And what does the bible have to do with anything?

Peace and blessings...
When a person says "bible" it is just a saying like "it must be right" or "it's like a law" or it's like "a fact" ... It's just a saying. Not bringing God into this discussion at all. We know how he feels about cheating! Lol
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  #87  
Old 05-09-2012, 10:01 AM
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Let me ask you completely... If ur husband cheats would you rather never find out?
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  #88  
Old 05-09-2012, 10:01 AM
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That is soooo not true! I know women who date and screw like a typical man! In fact I know a few who dump men when they become emotionally attached to them. Your making some BOLD generalizations!
Why is what I say "sooooooooo not true"? Is it because your experiences are different than mine? Is it because your circle of friends/whomever is what it is and mine is at it is? Or is it because you don't know anyone personally? I know men who cheat because they "can" just as I've stated and I know women who've cheated for some sort of emotional fullfilment.

Let's be a little more open-minded here. The reality is that men and women cheat for a variety of reasons. But my original post was: would you stay w/your man/woman/other after finding out that they cheated?

Peace and blessings...
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  #89  
Old 05-09-2012, 10:05 AM
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Let me ask you completely... If ur husband cheats would you rather never find out?
My post wasn't geared towards me but since you asked...the truth is... I'll never know... So why worry myself over something I have no control over.

The rules are established in my house.. now if we choose not to follow the rules, then there are consequences.... need I say more?

Peace and blessings...
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  #90  
Old 05-09-2012, 10:06 AM
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Originally Posted by COMPLETElyhis

Why is what I say "sooooooooo not true"? Is it because your experiences are different than mine? Is it because your circle of friends/whomever is what it is and mine is at it is? Or is it because you don't know anyone personally? I know men who cheat because they "can" just as I've stated and I know women who've cheated for some sort of emotional fullfilment.

Let's be a little more open-minded here. The reality is that men and women cheat for a variety of reasons. But my original post was: would you stay w/your man/woman/other after finding out that they cheated?

Peace and blessings...
I'm being very open minded cause my posts actually say it happens for a VARIETY of reasons! Not just men are this and women are that... I don't want to offend you, I thought we could disagree in what we feel on this subject and kept smiling. I answered your original post and have answered some of the many sub discussions within the thread. But I can answer your question again if you like. No I would not stay with a man who was disloyal to me PERIOD. I deserve better and I will teach my daughters the SAME thing!
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  #91  
Old 05-09-2012, 10:07 AM
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When a person says "bible" it is just a saying like "it must be right" or "it's like a law" or it's like "a fact" ... It's just a saying. Not bringing God into this discussion at all. We know how he feels about cheating! Lol
I get it... but I'm not speaking any sort of "law". I am only speaking from my own observations.

Peace and blessings...
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Old 05-09-2012, 10:10 AM
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I'm being very open minded cause my posts actually say it happens for a VARIETY of reasons! Not just men are this and women are that... I don't want to offend you, I thought we could disagree in what we feel on this subject and kept smiling. I answered your original post and have answered some of the many sub discussions within the thread. But I can answer your question again if you like. No I would not stay with a man who was disloyal to me PERIOD. I deserve better and I will teach my daughters the SAME thing!
No offense taken.

If I state my fact, then that's what it is. You can't question fact, but you can question opinion. We can agree to disagree. I stated my reasons, just as you stated yours. I did not object to your reasons...it's what it is. There are many reasons why people cheat, men and woman. I gave you my reasons...

If you cannot move on after being cheated on, that's cool. No judgment. You have to do what's best for you.

Peace and blessings...
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Old 05-09-2012, 11:14 AM
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Been there, done that. It gets easier as time goes on, but I'd still love to put a bullet through her cold blooded heart.

He was mine first, but I ended up being the other woman lol. She was rebound and got played when he started seeing me again. She seriously thought I was just there to be there, that nothing was going on. It hurt like hell that he hid our love when she was around, but I was never the fool. I knew everything that was going on. and I got him to myself in the end.
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Old 05-09-2012, 11:36 AM
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Originally Posted by LoveMyMeche
In the words of Sweet Brown " I ain't got time for THAT"... If he chooses to cheat after all this time and ALL THIS.. I'm OUT and I ain't being fake, acting tough, or anything of the like.. THAT is my RELATIONSHIP killer. I would ACTUALLY leave and chunk him the dueces while doing so!
I'm with ya on this one . Now normally I wld say marriage is a life long vow taking in front of God ,BUT,my hunny told me that is his line ,if I cheat he is gone no matter how hard it pains him . So there for I have adopted the same standards for his butt
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Old 05-09-2012, 04:23 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by COMPLETElyhis

How about if you don't go to the bar, you may not be tempted to drink? I'm just saying...

Peace and blessings...
Im not deleting communication with friends and family because of a few guys. I make it known to people that I am in a relationship.

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Old 05-09-2012, 07:42 PM
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Originally Posted by AllSmiless
I would like to think I would. but I'm not entirely sure I would. If we talked about it and I honestly felt like he regretted it and wouldn't do it again I would probably give him a second chance.

it's easy to say what you would do until your actually in the situation and emotions are involved.
I agree 110 percent... You took the words right out of my mouth!
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Old 05-09-2012, 07:58 PM
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Originally Posted by D's lady
That would hurt me. I have dealt with other women liking him. It's hard! I was prego with our 2nd child and this pretty and skinny girl was calling him nonstop. They both say it was for weed etc....I dunno for sure. I messed up once and me and a guy kissed (no tongue) 2 months ago. I cried afterwards. I was honest and told my man. He ended up forgiving me...but he won't forget it! He thinks I'm out here doing who knows what. He is slowly backing off. I just remind him that I put up with a lot of BS over him and getting in trouble. If he can forgive me....I could forgive him. Please stay faithful no matter what! Even though it was just a kiss, my guy was so hurt and still thinks more happened. He thinks kissing is more intimate than sex. I still feel horrible over it.

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  #98  
Old 05-09-2012, 08:08 PM
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If my man cheats out on me I'm done. I could never trust him again and I would kick the girl's ass. But I would have to have proof.
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Old 05-10-2012, 01:25 AM
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I've been through it with my husband. It was a serious shock and I was out of the door. I had a lot of questions and eventually heard him out. He came up with his own list of things to do what he could to assure me that it was a mistake fueled by his ego and nothing more and told me to add to the list. He did and is doing everything he vowed to show his commitment to this family and marriage. I have to tell you, I've never been the type of person to think once a ____ always a ____. People make mistakes. While I was fully prepared to leave initially, I had to remind myself that I would never just give up on my marriage at one sign of trouble. I had to evaluate my relationship, my husband and both his words and actions. My personal choice is that I won't put myself through it a second time because it is extremely difficult to deal with. I have my days but we are back on track and our love even stronger.
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Old 05-10-2012, 08:21 AM
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Have you seen Pretty Woman?
Hahaha yes lol! I forgot about that!

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