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Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison For everyone who has a husband, boyfriend or male partner incarcerated.

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  #126  
Old 05-06-2012, 08:36 AM
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Originally Posted by JonsBabyLola View Post
I miss him so much it hurts me deep inside... He has been locked up for ten years. I can't believe it's been that long, and I still would drop everything and run to him if i only could... I met another guy after he had been locked up for four and a half years. Please understand, we were only 18 yrs old when he was sentenced...to a twenty year sentence. I loved him so much even though we were young...we grew up together and he is and was my world. my best friend...

So I met the other guy, and he cheered me up, but he wasn't Jon... But I ended up having a daughter with the other guy, my only child... And now six years later, I sent Jon a Christmas card and we have been writing and talking and picked right back up, the love is still there.... I went to visit him three times and we talked and talked and laughed and cried, and we are back together! It feels so wonderful to have him back in my life, I am so grateful! But it has opened up this emotional can of worms. I miss my Jon so bad, I can barely take it. I have to function for the sake of my daughter, but lately all I want to do is sleep and cry and write letters to him. But his words are so encouraging and kind hearted, it has deepened our bond so much. He has to serve mandatory 7 and a half more years. Because in our state (MO) you must serve 85%. Even though he hasn't had a write up in 5 yrs, this was his very first offense, and he was only 18 and had gotten into drugs.... We are now 27 and still very much in love and want to get married, but want to have a nice wedding and not have our celebration in prison because we want all of our families there.

Sorry this is so long, I am missing him so much... I hope he can call soon just so I can hear his voice... :::::Tears::::

His Wife 4 Life
Cheer up girl! I am happy that Jon was still in your heart and you in his. Just write him whenever you feel sad from missing him. That bond does get stronger over time. Try to stay focused, no matter what! How about your daughter's father is he out of the picture? I wish you and your Jon peace and blessings and your daughter as well.
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  #127  
Old 05-06-2012, 06:25 PM
Hisbabygurl0409 Hisbabygurl0409 is offline
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oh wow just when I thought I couldn't be stressed anymore, I was proven wrong. I told my man that I wasn't going to have calls this weekend and he just tried to call me and I couldn't accept the call because I don't have enough money on the phone I am hoping to be able to go see him tomorrow but his mom is my ride and she's pissed off (not at me) but now she might not be taking me. Like I stated before he is still in county but may be getting shipped this tuesday to Elmira and then I won't be able to see him until he is in their for at least 2 weeks God all I wanna do is cry but I am so sick of crying UGH! I miss my baby so much it hurts literally.
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  #128  
Old 05-07-2012, 03:49 AM
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[COLOR="rgb(75, 0, 130)"]So my boyfriend has been sentenced. It isn't that long, but he shouldn't be there in the first place. He was sentenced on the 4/5/12 so only a couple of days ago and to say im in shock would be an understatement. I have tried to speak to friends about it all and they have no idea what im going through, yet they say they understand. I feel lost and so alone. I live alone now and really struggling to cope. I miss him so much, I just wish I could lay in his arms and tell him how much I love him. He was in remand for a month prior to the sentencing and since he was taken away from me I have been crying and drinking myself to sleep. Everyone keeps saying you should cut down on the wine, I know that but it makes me feel a little better. I live over 400 miles away from the prison so it's 10 hours journey on the coach and it's expensive so I can only afford to visit once a month and even then it's a struggle, I will have to go without something I need in order to give him what he needs. I feel as if the whole world is on my shoulders, he said I am the only thing keeping him sane and stopping him from killing himself, Im flattered he loves me so much. But what if I cant do a good enough job to keep him going? Im going out of my mind, I watched him being sentenced and being dragged back to the cells. I ended up having a panic attack. He's a biker and every time I hear a bike now I cry or go into shock. I have locked myself in the house away from everyone because no one understands or even seems to care, they just say it's not too long but it is a long time for someone to be in there when they shouldn't be. I use the emailaprisoner every day and it takes 2 days to get to him, he writes but sometimes it takes 2 weeks to get to me, he doesn't get much chance to call me as there is only one phone on the block and you have to wait in line to use the phone. I feel guilty as many of you probably have to wait a lot longer but im in so much pain, I feel as if I dont have the strength to cope with this situation at all. [/color]
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  #129  
Old 05-07-2012, 04:01 AM
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Originally Posted by hisfemale View Post
So.... my man has been on box visits for 7 weeks now, until late May.
He came to his pa's funeral today, was the first time we were able to touch once he left this feeling of... I guess loss filled me, I felt like I lost him to prison all over again.
Like, a whole day of being able to kiss, hug, hold his hand (even though he was cuffed) plus him being out, so close to home but unable to come home. When he left I instantly felt lost, he only has 6 weeks left, but knowing this Friday when I visit him it will be back behind glass makes it really hard to visit. I'm not sure how to explain it, all I know is the whole feeling of him only having 6 weeks left, than getting to touch him for a day and back to no contact breaks me.

Also... is there a difference between missing your boyfriend and obsessively missing him?
This GIRL I thought was a friend of mine deleted me off facebook a month after he went in. I post the occasional so many months so many days until he is home status, the I miss him's, I love him's, Can't wait till he is home and what not status's... I messaged her and asked her why it was that she deleted me she said she was sick of reading my status's because there's missing your boyfriend and obsessively missing him which I couldn't understand, Fair enough she didn't want to read them, I get that. But for someone who has a boyfriend who she can see and talk to whenever she wants, to tell me that I'm obsessively missing my man who's imprisoned seemed, I guess silly. It's a big adjustment going from spending every day with your man to knowing you will be separated for 6 months with only so much contact, she wouldn't know this... does it seem like a stupid reason or a type of jealousy to you's?
Woohooo he is home soon if Your ticker is telling the time right!!!
As for the "girl" ... I honestly don't think you can understand what it's like unless you have been through or are going through it... and in part I guess this is way this site is so important.. who else would get it. I don't think she is jealous...but I do think any true friend would try to understand where you are coming from (even if she just unsubscribed from your updates if they were really bothering her). I think you are better off without her, I know that won't make anything feel better though.
Hugs to you, Jenni
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  #130  
Old 05-07-2012, 04:24 AM
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Well I am so new to this but I have been up all nite with my man on my mind I miss him so much it seems like its never going to end he has been in the county for 15 months and he has finally got sent to doc he got 26 months ! It really sucks not being able to talk to him and hear his voice I am waiting on my phone number to be approved (hopefully sometime soon) I can say I will be doing ALOT of overtime at work to make time go by faster and keep my mind off things. I hope things get better soon cause i dont know how much more cry and sleepless nites I can take !
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  #131  
Old 05-07-2012, 01:27 PM
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I went to go see my love this morning and today the CO's were being buttholes! Normally we get an hr and a half to 2 hrs to visit. Well today we only got about 55 min Now it's raining and thundering which is the perfect cuddle weather! I cannot wait until the day I can just lay in his arms and talk about anything and everything. This weather makes me miss him soo much more! 12 more months...

I am so sorry, but you know God is good and He sees everyhitng, be strong even it is not easy.
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  #132  
Old 05-07-2012, 01:33 PM
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I missed my husband every day!!! I cannot even describe how much I missed him. I will have a c-section tomorrow and he is not going to be there when our baby will be born. I am trying to stay strong, but it is not easy, but I try anyway I have mixed feeling, sometimes I feel anger @ him, that he put us in this situation and sometimes I am ready to forgive him for everything and have him next to us Of course I missed him more than I am angry with him God bless all of you!!!
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  #133  
Old 05-07-2012, 01:34 PM
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Default Blah...I miss him...

The 1yr mark is on 5/15...cant believe we have made it 1 yr apart :/ With our two babies my time has been flying by yet his time in there is taking forever, he says. I just want 8/2013 to get here ASAP!!!!!!! Please God!!!! oh and Thank you!
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  #134  
Old 05-07-2012, 04:46 PM
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Originally Posted by Hisladiiforever View Post
Well I am so new to this but I have been up all nite with my man on my mind I miss him so much it seems like its never going to end he has been in the county for 15 months and he has finally got sent to doc he got 26 months ! It really sucks not being able to talk to him and hear his voice I am waiting on my phone number to be approved (hopefully sometime soon) I can say I will be doing ALOT of overtime at work to make time go by faster and keep my mind off things. I hope things get better soon cause i dont know how much more cry and sleepless nites I can take !

Sorry to hear that you are having to deal with all of this. My best advice to you is to remain busy and the time shall pass faster. I feel ya on the crying thing... it gets quite old and annoying( at least for me it does). I wish you all the best of luck in this time of trials. Just remember everyday that he is gone is one day closer to the two of you being back together.
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  #135  
Old 05-07-2012, 07:50 PM
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The 1yr mark is on 5/15...cant believe we have made it 1 yr apart :/ With our two babies my time has been flying by yet his time in there is taking forever, he says. I just want 8/2013 to get here ASAP!!!!!!! Please God!!!! oh and Thank you!


I'm sorry that his time is taking forever.... 8/2013 will be here before you know it
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  #136  
Old 05-08-2012, 12:42 PM
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Wow! I am so glad that I joined this community because you all know what I am going thru! I miss my husband so much. He's been in since October 2011 just about 7 months now. We knew when he was fighting his case that he was going to be doing some time but we got hit hard with an 8 year sentence. We were anticipating at least 3 years but a previous strike from when my husband was a teenager haunted us. We are still at the beginning of this journey. I have been able to have visits with him every weekend but we are still on a non-contact basis. I just yearn to feel my husband's touch. I admit I get jealous of all the women I see in the visiting room sitting with their men and walking around the room holding hands. I just wish to hug my man and be in his arms again. I know I will get there soon. My husband and I have been together for 6 years. It is so hard being away from him and just knowing how long he has to do. We have no children of our own yet. Thats another burden I hold in my heart. Our love is strong and I know together we will get thru this. He needs my support just as much as I need him. Thanks for letting me vent out my feelings!!
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  #137  
Old 05-08-2012, 04:15 PM
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I miss him so much it causes me physical pain. He was supposed to be released TODAY, but guess what...yep the AZ DOC has decided to pull the rug out from under us and now we have 77 more days. I know that doesnt sound so bad to those of you who have longer, and my heart goes out to you all, but when you are counting down the days after being apart for so long only to be told, oh sorry you have to wait even longer to be in his arms, it kind of crashes your world. Yes missing him is the worst, he is a good man and he loves me like crazy and I love him, its the waiting and not knowing if he's safe, or for sure when he will get to come home and what will the DOC pull next, what hoops will they require us to jump through next. I miss him and it hurts.
Kelly's Baby Girl
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  #138  
Old 05-09-2012, 06:19 AM
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What a blessing that this sticky was here, right as I was thinking I needed to come here and write about how much I missed my man. I miss my husband terribly. He's been gone now going on 2 1/2 months. I was okay at first, after the first week. The first week I felt like a widow, that he was dead, even though I knew he wasn't. After that I did okay for awhile. I mean, I missed him, but it wasn't this terrible ache that I've been feeling the last few days. I am really lonely for some physical affection- I miss the times of just sitting on the couch holding him and his holding me. How often I took that for granted! Our visits have been no touch allowed, so I haven't even held his hand since February 24th. I have another almost 6 months of this. I know so many of you ladies have much longer to go, but I just don't know how I can manage this for another 6 months. I suppose only with the grace of God, just like anything else, right?
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  #139  
Old 05-09-2012, 09:10 AM
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Dedicated to Fatty......
My Love , My man, My protector , My best friend, My world
My husband to be.....I cant wait to be Mrs. Cam Hepburn.
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  #140  
Old 05-09-2012, 09:11 AM
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This is is a blog to talk with women who can relate to what you are going through. Somewhere you can meet friends, or rant. A spot you can make your own voice heard in a non-judgemental place.
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  #141  
Old 05-09-2012, 09:13 AM
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If You Love a Convict, You Are Not Alone



I started this blog because I thought I could not possibly be the only one trying to survive on the outside as a spouse of an inmate. I was looking to connect with other people who knew what it was like to visit your loved one in prison, deal with family and friends who did not quite understand what you were going through and seem to put parts of your life on hold while you just wait. And over the life of the blog, your responses have told me that I was right.

Have I met anyone directly because of this blog? No. But I have been privileged to talk, e-mail and chat with some of the finest people this world has to offer. They are people who know a deeper love than most people will ever get to experience. They have decided that they are willing to wait, endure the humiliation and offer all the support they can physically offer to someone who made a few bad choices in their life.

I wanted to offer a road map for others to follow since I would have loved a few sage words of advice, but instead I have been inspired by the strength that I see in these people and by the love that I feel in knowing that I am not alone in my experiences. We are all at different points of the journey and we all respond in different ways, but as a whole I would declare all these people to be the greatest role models that we could ever offer.

There is a strength within each one of them that gives me the confidence to know that we will all get through this, survive and even prosper. They have courage to get up every day and keep fighting, whether it be to just make it through another day or to stand up and fight the system that continues to lock up our loved ones because of ignorance and political gain. They all possess an awesome ability to look beyond the surface and see people for who they really are and see the inner kindness that others seem to miss. They refuse to judge other people based only on what they hear, learning to form their own judgments based on their own experiences and perceptions. Their capacity for loving another human being makes them someone that I would seek out and gladly call my friend.

Others may look at us and wonder what kind of person would choose to stay with a felon, prisoner, or convict? What is wrong with us that we do not leave? But I am here to tell you that I would seek out these people knowing that they would make the greatest friends anyone could ever hope to have. I have been blessed to meet some people in a similar situation and I will have you know that they have become wonderful friends to me in the short time that I have known them. The relationship that we share is similar to a relationship that has many years and experiences behind it. I lost some of those lifelong relationships in this process, but I am so much more confident in the new ones that I now have.

I wish that the on-line groups had a category called "Convict Lover" because I would reach out and make friends with all of them. You could do no better if you can claim even just one of us as a friend.
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  #142  
Old 05-09-2012, 09:57 AM
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My husband has been gone 3 days...we have not even had a hearing yet...Bail hearing is tomorrow. I hope we can get the bail down..right now its at $100,000. I barely sleep, eat or function. Our 3 year old daughter is absolutely missing her Father. I HOPE we can get him out on bail tomorrow. I have missed a week of work due to this and my breakdowns. I am screwed pretty much with bills. We will lose the apartment at the end of this month for sure. I moved in with his parents who are trying to be supportive as possible. As long as I am living with his parents all I need to worry about is our 2 car payments PLUS the car insurance. I can handle this....hopefully. All I want is for my husband to NOT be charged he is totally innocent. He is the rock in his who family and my life. I just don't know if I an go about this by myself. I am so scared.
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  #143  
Old 05-09-2012, 05:35 PM
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Default Missing my husband

My husband was convicted and sentenced to 2 years to a crime he did not commit. His daughter from a one night stand lied about him. We live in Maryland and is a disabled veteran. He's never been in trouble with the law, had no records whatsoever but still... the judge gave him the max of 10 years... all but 2 years is suspended. He has a lot of chronic medical condition and the medical care so far has been kinda terrible. I miss him so much. We've been together fro almost 14 years... has two daughters together. It breaks my heart when my little one says ' want to see Daddy" or I miss Daddy Mommy... when is he coming home. How can I comfort myself when I can't even fathom the situation we're in. I miss him so much it hurts. I've been so distracted at work since his sentencing 4 weeks ago... i have a support system at work and some family but they really have no clue as to what me and my daughters are going through. I miss his laughter... his jokes... his childhood stories. I just miss him!!!
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  #144  
Old 05-09-2012, 10:04 PM
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My husband and I were high school sweethearts, and as soon as we turned 18, we went and got our 1st apt together, the same day we were moving in he got arrested, that was Jan 2003, this is now May 2012, he has been there for 9years 5 months, he got sentenced to 12yrs so with good time he may be able to get out mid 2013, so 10yrs we've been hangin on to what he and I have, and I tell u, if there is a will there is a way, we decided to get married in 2010, and grant it, its not been easy but there is no one else I would spend my life with, we have learned so much more about EO and its nothing but good!!!! All im sayin is if u truly love someone then nothing will come between that! People will say oh u can do better and etc.. but noone knows how u feel but u, ive heard it all in the 10yrs hes been in there, and eventually u just laugh about it!!! Best of luck 2 u!!!
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  #145  
Old 05-09-2012, 10:08 PM
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Originally Posted by nikiholmes
My husband and I were high school sweethearts, and as soon as we turned 18, we went and got our 1st apt together, the same day we were moving in he got arrested, that was Jan 2003, this is now May 2012, he has been there for 9years 5 months, he got sentenced to 12yrs so with good time he may be able to get out mid 2013, so 10yrs we've been hangin on to what he and I have, and I tell u, if there is a will there is a way, we decided to get married in 2010, and grant it, its not been easy but there is no one else I would spend my life with, we have learned so much more about EO and its nothing but good!!!! All im sayin is if u truly love someone then nothing will come between that! People will say oh u can do better and etc.. but noone knows how u feel but u, ive heard it all in the 10yrs hes been in there, and eventually u just laugh about it!!! Best of luck 2 u!!!
Loved this post, somethin I needed to hear(: I hope he's able to get out so you two can spend the rest of your lives together! Best Wishes(:
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  #146  
Old 05-09-2012, 11:39 PM
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I miss my hubby soso much that theres days i wish i can walk in to my house and have him surprise me:/ i know what a dum day dream.. at nites i look out my window and look up at the moon, and wishing him a goodnite sleep and kiss his picture while I'm breaking down:-(. I ask god to watch over him each nite and to please oh please let time fly fast.
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  #147  
Old 05-10-2012, 09:22 PM
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I miss my hubby soso much that theres days i wish i can walk in to my house and have him surprise me:/ i know what a dum day dream.. at nites i look out my window and look up at the moon, and wishing him a goodnite sleep and kiss his picture while I'm breaking down:-(. I ask god to watch over him each nite and to please oh please let time fly fast.


Awww this is so sweet. I pray that your time you have to wait flies by. I wish you all the best of luck on this long journey!
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  #148  
Old 05-10-2012, 09:45 PM
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I miss my lovey more than anything. He has 5 years down and a lot more to go but I will stand by him forever and always. We grew up together. He tells me how strong I am, I just want to scream at him that I am only strong because I have to be, but I would rather be weak in his arms.
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Old 05-10-2012, 10:14 PM
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Default little things

wow. i feel like everything of him is slowly fading out. maybe its i just miss him too much but his clothes arent thrown on the couch mo more. his scent isnt on my pillows anymore *sighs* wow. i never thought i would notice the little things like that. i laid away last night thinking that and here i am now. i just want the little things back. thats all. ill be content with him being gone but damn it give me back my little things =(
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  #150  
Old 05-11-2012, 05:44 PM
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Default He is "The one I have been looking for"

I met my man during his incarceration. When I first started to write to him all I was doing was trying to lift him up and encourage him. I had no idea nor intentions of any of this happening the more we talked the more we got to know each other and we have. Now discovered that we are each others soulmates! I complete him and he completes me! I love him so much. He writes me everyday and I also do the same. We share scripture and pray for each other I post money to him when I can I just can't wait til we can be together! He is my heart!
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